Once again, C&C on a story posted days ago. :P
   This appears to be another "Ranma-gets-split" story, never really one
of my favorite premises. That's just personal preference, nothing wrong
with writing one. The killing off of the male Ranma would seem to set the
stage for a darkfic.
   To counterbalance this, the story is written in script format. While
there's nothing wrong with script fics, they tend to work better for
comedies than serious pieces. Script pieces aren't really able to
effectively portray detail and emotions as well as story format; not a
problem for comedy but a serious handicap for emotional pieces.
   Also, the end of part 1 seems to suggest that some sort of happy ending
is possible, after the appropriate amount of angst is dealt with.
   Ranma's female form in the fic is refered to as Ran-co, something I
found a little odd. Should this be "Ranko" (the normal form of spelling),
or was it spelled this way on purpose?
   I found the bit with the wizard to be a bit weak....some additional
information about him would help. (Like why he and Ranma were having it
out in the first place.)
   I still feel that this would, IMHO, be stronger in story format. You
might want to consider changing it to that. Or you might not. :)
   Overall, not bad. Keep it up.

- Mike of No Particular Title or Handle
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  /  \    l   Mike Loader - Lincolnite, Amberite, Illuminatus, Discordian,
 / () \   l      Journalist, Author, Traveler, Historian, Java Fiend.
/      \  l        Trier - LA - LV - Kiev - Reno - Hong Kong. Fnord.
--------  l                    mloader@scs.unr.edu
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