Chinese Samurai
By Jack Ji
Part VII: Wanted: Fourth Horsemen
I had just finished breakfast, being mouth fed by Shampoo,
and was about to start working when Hanny walked in.
"Hey, Jack," he greeted me. "Thought you'd be working here
since you didn't come home last night. What happened?"
"Well, ah, after I left Ranko," I began, "it was, um, pretty late
so Cologne let me stay for the night."
"Oh, is that all?" he said. "Everyone thought you stayed at
Tendo Training Hall again. Anyway, I'm here to tell you that we need
you to help us move today. It isn't much other than packing the bags
and unpacking."
"Ah, I think it'll be OK if I take the day off after noon," I said.
I then turned to Cologne, "Is it OK if I take the day off at noon for this,
Great-grandmother?"
"Yes, but that means you will have little time to train today,"
she answered. "You two go out and practice with each other."
"But I didn't come here to train," Hanny said. "Besides, we
need someone to teach us."
"Teach yourselves!" she whacked Hanny over the head. "Now
go and practice. I must talk with my great-granddaughter."
"Yes, Great-grandmother," I bowed and quickly left out the
back door, pushing Hanny along with me.
******
"How was he?" Cologne asked her great-granddaughter.
"Shampoo no understand, Great-grandmother," she replied.
"In bed! How was he in bed?!" she almost yelled.
"Oh, um, Shampoo and Jack no doing," she looked down at
her feet.
"So, he resists well," Cologne nodded.
"No is that, Great-grandmother," she said. "Jack very shy and
nervous when Shampoo near. Strange, yes?"
"Hmm... It appears he needs a little `help,'" Cologne said. "I
suggest you use the Passion Spice next time you have the chance,
child."
"Yes, Great-grandmother," she agreed. "Shampoo do."
"I am sure it will work," Cologne said. "If Jack really lived by
what he just told Ranma, he wouldn't have played that joke on him nor
given him that lecture. He tries to hide it, but not very well."
******
There were two hitting posts covered with straw out back. It
appeared that Cologne wanted us to practice striking. We both found it
strange that she put out two, as if expecting Hanny's arrival.
"Hey, check this out," I said. I stood a few feet away from
Hanny and punched the air.
"Wow, it-it feels like two fingers tapping on my chest," Hanny
blinked and touched his chest.
"Yeah, Great-grandmother's been teaching me this," I said.
We then turned our attention back to the posts.
"Looks like she wants me to practice with my swords," Hanny
said. He made fists and the two glowing blue beams appeared in his
hands.
"You?" I asked. "I think she wants us to practice. Why else
would she put TWO posts up?" I summoned my katana and
unsheathed it.
"W-when did you learn to create weapons out of thin air?"
Hanny asked. I explained what had happened yesterday. "Oh, that's
cool."
"Let's begin," I said to him. I threw my sheath at the my post,
which cut a little part off the top, and charged in with my katana. It was
great having a projectile weapon like that. Hanny just stood there,
staring at what I've done. He soon joined me in hacking his post.
At first, I was a little uncomfortable and unfamiliar with the
sword. My mind had the knowledge from the ceremony but my body
wasn't used to it yet. Fortunately, it adapted quickly. Hanny looked like
he has been using his weapons for years.
His weapons only hacked chunks out of the post but mine
sliced through it. In fact, I accidentally cut it in half from my
inexperience.
"Man, this sucks now," I said, sheathing my sword.
"Yeah, now you don't have anything to hack at," Hanny
agreed.
"I wish these posts could reattach themselves," I said, turning
to Hanny. His eyes were widening and pointing something behind me.
"L-look behind y-you," he told me. I turned around and saw
the post back together in one piece. "I-it reattached itself just after you
wished it would."
"Maybe it's the wood," I blinked. "Here, you slice it off on my
post." He began hacking but it wouldn't cut. It was like bashing a
wooden stick against a tree. Only pieces of wood flew everywhere.
"You have it on the wrong setting, friend of young one,"
Cologne came out of nowhere. "There are three gems on each wrist
band. Each gem represents a different setting. The default setting is
crush. The one you need is cut."
"How can I tell what setting is what?" Hanny asked.
"How can you tell if your hand is above your head or below?"
she answered. "It is part of you now, you will feel the difference. The
wrist bands will tell you."
Hanny tapped one of the gems and the two beams turned a
darker blue. He began cutting and slicing the thick post and finally
sliced it in half.
"Ah, I wish you would reattach yourself," Hanny said, a little
unsure of himself. Nothing happened.
"You have wasted a good piece of wood!" Cologne hacked
him on the head. "Have you no control?"
"Ow! I'm sorry, Col- Great-grandmother," he apologized.
"Jack cut it and it reattached itself. We thought it was the wood."
"It reattached itself?" Cologne questioned his statement.
"Yes, it did, Great-grandmother," I answered.
"Do it on that piece of wood," she ordered. I summoned my
katana and did as she said. It reattached itself.
"This has never happened before," she said. "Your ancestors
must have sensed that you are not truly aggressive and thus gave you
the ability to heal anything or anyone who you have cut."
"So, I could, like, cut off someone's head and make it reattach
itself" I check with her.
"Yes, young one," she said.
"Rad!" a glint came to my eye. "Ah, come here, Hanny. He-
he-he."
"Oh, no you don't," he backed away.
"I was just joking," I assured him.
"You said there are three settings," Hanny stated. "What's the
third one?"
"That one, friend of young one, is the barrier setting," she
replied.
"Barrier?" we both questioned at once.
"Yes," she answered. "It is a one way barrier; anything that
comes towards you will bounce off. You can use it like a shield.
Anything that is thrown away from you will be enhanced with the
magical shielding."
"Huh? I don't get it," Hanny scratched his head.
"Just put it on the third setting," she ordered. Hanny did as she
said. The two beams shot up from his hands but they were much
thinner and a little darker. Between the two beams was a dark blue
barrier that was slightly transparent.
"Now, young one, throw your sheath at it," she told me. I did
and she said. Hanny raised the barrier above his head and I threw my
sheath, point first, at it. It bounced off harmlessly onto the ground and
disappeared in a small puff of smoke.
"I see now!" Hanny said. "But I still don't get the enhancing
part."
"Must I show everything to you!" she exclaimed. "Now,
young one, stand behind him and do the same thing."
Hanny raised the barrier above his head and I threw my sheath
from behind him. As it went through the barrier, it caught on the blue
glow and kept flying. When it hit the wall, it made a huge hole after the
smoke cleared.
"Ah, thank you for showing me this, Col- er, Great-
grandmother," Hanny bowed.
"You're welcome, friend of young one," she nodded. "Now, I
understand that you must go and get Michael."
"Uh, OK, Great-grandmother," Hanny said. "I'll be back in a
jiffy."
"Take your time," she said. "You don't need to get back till
noon, remember?"
"Uh, sure," he left.
******
"I believe you and your friends have chosen to be a team,"
Cologne said. Hanny had left a few minutes ago. Cologne had told me
to practice every basic move that I learned in the ceremony yesterday.
"Your mind is set but your body and spirit must adapt to your
newly acquired knowledge, young one," she had said. So, the best way
to get my body used to my new knowledge was to do those moves.
I did each kick, block, strike, stance and just about everything
else 25 times. I had everything down around the tenth time but I wanted
to make sure my body was ready. Then, she had me do all the kata I
learned also. That was VERY tiring, but it's all part of training.
"Yes, Great-grandmother," I answered her whiling still doing
my kata. "We even chose a name, the Four Horsemen."
"But there is only three of you," she stated.
"Yes, I know," I said, ending my kata. "I guess you could say
we're looking for a fourth one."
"Aiyah! Shampoo be fourth horsemen!" Shampoo jumped
out of nowhere and glomped onto me. "Shampoo be near Jack then."
"Uh, not to be sexist or anything, Shampoo-chan," I began,
"but it doesn't sound good to be the Four Horsepersons. Then again,
considering your case, it'd be the 3.5 Horsepersons and .5 Horse-cat."
"Jack no want Shampoo near him?" she frowned. I was
surprised that she didn't get mad at me.
"Ah, no-no-no-no, it's not that," I said. "It's, ah, it's because
most likely Mike and Hanny won't like it, yeah, that's it."
"Oh, that all?" she said. "Jack like Shampoo near him, yes?"
"Ah, of course, I do," I said and embraced her back. "I hope
it's OK now, right Shampoo-chan?"
"Yes, Shampoo go back working now," she said. Then she
gave me a small peck on the lips. I felt a small trickle of blood run down
my nose.
"Uh, yeah," I said, letting her go and wiping my nose with my
thumb. She went back into the restaurant and I started doing more kata.
I finished my last kata and Cologne immediately had me start
something new.
"Now that your body has started to adapt to your new
knowledge," she started, "we will start training on your chi."
"Great, more chi stuff," I threw my hands in the air. She
whacked me over the head this time, only because I was too tired to
really dodge or block it.
"I will start teaching you how to use your chi," she said. "But
you must first learn to use it up somehow or you will explode."
"Explode?" I cringed.
"Yes, but do not worry," she said. "I believe you can handle
what I'm going to teach you. Remember, think about your heritage and
your ancestors. That will help you bring out your chi."
"Yes, Great-grandmo-" I started standing up but she whacked
me over the head. "Ow! What are you do-"
"Keep quiet, young one, this is part of your training," she
started whacking me furiously. It felt like she hit me hundreds of
thousands of time and not just on the head. I tried to block and dodge
but she was just too quick for me.
Then I began to think about my ancestors and China. I thought
of all the hardships my parents and grandparents have gone through. I
thought of all the dynasties and what I knew about Chinese history.
"I've had enough of this!" I shouted and stood up straight.
She hacked me once more but I didn't feel anything. There was only
pressure on my chest.
"You have taken a small step today, young one," she smiled.
Her cane was pressed against my chest. Rather, it was pressed against a
transparent blue shielding just an inch away from my chest.
"W-what is this?" I asked, looking at my chest.
"You have learned the chi shield," she said, taking her cane
away from my chest. "It converts chi and battle aura into a shield that
will protect you whenever there is another battle aura present that tries
to attack you. However, it will wear down since it is taking power from
your chi."
"Uh, thanks, Great-grandmother," I said. I headed back into
the restaurant, thinking she excused me.
"We are not done yet, young one," she poked my back but my
chi shield automatically prevented it from touching my body. The only
thing I felt was a slight pressure from her pushing.
"I'm sorry," I apologized. "I thought we were done for today."
"Not yet, but almost, young one," she said. I turned around
and saw that huge electric fan again. "I want you to learn Air Drill
today."
"Yes, Great-grandmother," I sighed. I was tired and really
didn't want to do this but it would help my stamina.
I stood in front of the fan again, this time a little closer than the
last time. Cologne hit the ULTRA HIGH switch, which I had never
noticed before. The wind hit me in a big gust. I somehow managed to
keep my footing and started to push into the wind.
Amazingly, I could do full extensions with my punches. I then
tried to do with my palms against the wind and did it again.
"Yes!" Cologne exclaimed. "Use your chi!"
I did as she told me and tried to channel it into my punches. I
didn't know exactly how I did it, but I did. It felt like I've done this
before. Then I realized that I have memories of training to learn Air
Drill. I used those memories and the knowledge to my advantage and I
soon was punching and kicking without any trouble into the wind. My
balance was even improving and I had no problem breathing against the
it.
Then, I did it. I started moving the fan with my strikes. It
budged a little. Then I did two punches and it tipped back slightly.
Then, I did a full kick and punch combo with knocked it down on it's
back. It came down with a loud crash.
"Yes!" Cologne exclaimed again. "Your body has learned how
to do the Air Drill, young one."
"Yes, Great-grandmother," I panted. "Am- am I done for
*pant* the day?"
"Yes, you may go back into the restaurant," she said. "I
believe your friends will be coming soon. I'd take a shower first,
however."
******
I half walked, half crawled into the restaurant. I went into the
bathroom and took a shower. I was EXTREMELY tired. It was nice to
feel the warm water down my back.
"Man, I'm going to be sore tomorrow," I said to myself. When
I opened the shower curtain, I found a naked Shampoo in front of me. I
immediately grabbed a towel and wrapped it around myself.
"Great-grandmother tell Shampoo Jack taking shower," she
said and glomped onto me. "Shampoo join you!"
"Uh, I-I don't think that's a good idea, Shampoo-chan." I said.
I then reached down for the faucet and turned on the cold water.
"What you doing?" she looked at my hand. "Shampoo only
wan- meow" I splashed a little cold water on her.
"Sorry, Shampoo-chan," I apologized, holding her in my arms.
"I should have known Cologne would have told you to come up here."
******
I sat down to eat some ramen with Shampoo-neko in my lap.
Hanny and Mike had arrived already and joined me in eating lunch.
"So, we're going to move to Tendo Training Hall today,
right?" I checked with them.
"Right," Hanny answered. "We'll do all the moving around 3
or so."
"Oh, but I get off at noon," I said to Hanny. "Just as well, I
think I'll take a short stop at Furikan to check my e-mail there."
"They have access to the Internet there?" Mike looked up from
his bowl of noodles.
"Yeah, want to come along?"
"OK."
"Hey, about this name stuff," Hanny changed the subject.
"What about it?" I asked.
"I still think something like Mighty Morph-" Mike began.
"No, Mike," Hanny and I both frowned at him.
"The least you could do is NOT copy stuff from television
shows," I said.
"Fine, then," he did his usual frown. "I guess the Four
Horsemen sounds OK. Just where are we going to get the fourth
Horsemen?"
"Meow," Shampoo-neko hopped onto the table.
"Aw, isn't she so cute," Mike said. "Come here, Shammy."
Shampoo-neko only hissed at Mike and dropped back down to
my lap.
"Guess she doesn't like you, Mike," I smiled at him.
"Hey, isn't Mousse some kind of martial artist too?" Hanny
asked.
"Yeah, but I wouldn't choose him to be on our team," I said.
"He and I aren't exactly on good terms. Besides that, he has horrible
eye sight." I pointed at Mousse, who was talking to a plant.
"I'm sorry, sir," he said. "But I need to know what you want
to order."
"I see," Mike nodded. "More like Mousse doesn't see."
"What about Ranko or Akane?" Hanny suggested.
"Ah, alright, this is as good as a time as ever," sighed. "First
off, it doesn't sound good to be called the Four Horsepersons. That's
why I didn't choose Shampoo when she `applied.' Second, remember
how Saotome-san is cursed?"
"Yeah," the both answered, slurping more noodles.
"Don't you guys think that Ranma might also have a curse
since his dad also got one?" I questioned them. "I mean, he is his son!"
"You know, I thought about that for a little," Hanny nodded.
"You mean that..."
"Yup," I said.
"Ranma is also a panda?!" Mike jumped out of his seat.
Shampoo and I both smacked our heads. It was funny how a
cat can do that.
"Sit down, Mike," I ordered. "Ranko IS Ranma."
"Huh?" Mike still didn't get it.
"You mean that Ranko turns into a guy when splashed with
cold water?" Hanny asked.
I put my head in my hands. I got to find some friends that at
least had some clue.
"No, you idiots!" I shouted. "Ranma is a guy and turns into a
girl when splashed with water." I got a napkin and drew a picture on it,
showing them what I meant.
"Oh, now I get it," Mike nodded.
"You mean you knew this and you still went out with him last
night?" Hanny asked. I then explained why I did it to him.
"That's not very nice, Jack," Mike frowned at me. "How
would you like it if someone did that to you?"
"Well, I..." I turned my head. "I guess you got a point."
"Why can't we have Ranma as the fourth Horsemen then?"
Mike asked.
"Well, he and I aren't on the best terms yet either, especially
considering my little trick on him," I replied, a little ashamed now.
"Besides, we'd be the 3.5 Horsemen and .5 Horsegirl!"
Hanny took another bite from his ramen and said, "You got a
point again, Jack. You know, it seems wherever you go..."
"I know, I know. I always seem to make enemies somehow," I
sighed.
"I guess we'll just have to find the fourth one sometime later,"
Mike sighed.
"I suppose Shampoo told you this," Hanny said, finishing up
his ramen.
"Oh, almost forgot," I said. I finished my last bite of ramen.
"Come back into the kitchen with me. I want to show you something."
Mike left his bowl of noodles half eaten and followed me. I set
Shampoo-neko down and fill a glass with warm water.
"I hope you don't mind, Shampoo-chan," I said.
"Shampoo-chan?" Mike questioned. "I don't see Shampoo
anywhere."
"Just wait, I hope you don't guys overreact," I said and
poured the warm water on Shampoo. She instantly changed back into
her nude human form.
"W-wow," Hanny stared at her. Mike's eyes grew large and he
turned around. I had to push the staring Hanny out the door.
"You guys wait here until I come back," I said. "Finish your
ramen, Mike." I went back to Shampoo.
She was a little mad with me, "Why you doing that? Jack want
share Shampoo with friends?"
"No-no-no-no, it's not that," I stuttered. She still hadn't gotten
any clothes on yet. "I just wanted to show them your curse."
"Oh, only that?" she asked.
"Yup, nothing more," I said.
"Come with Shampoo," she said. "Shampoo need Jack's help
with something." I followed her into the storage room where the spices,
flour and ingredients are kept.
I walked in but didn't see Shampoo anywhere. Suddenly, the
door slammed behind me. I turned around and Shampoo, still naked,
was standing in front of the door. She then locked it and slid the key
under the door, out of anyone's reach from this side. I wondered why
they locked the door from the inside and not outside.
"Now, Shampoo and Jack alone," she brought out a glass of
water and put some strange powder in it.
"Wh-what do y-you mean, `alone?'" I asked. She only giggled
and came up to me. I backed away from her in my nervousness. Then
my back hit the wall and I had no more places to go. She came up close
to me and her hand went for my zipper.
"Whoa, I don't think you should go there," I grabbed her hand
and pulled it away.
"Jack is thirsty after training, yes?" she asked me. "Want to
drink water?"
"Ah, well, I-I've already, um, drank some water," I said. Her
head came up to my cheek.
"Drink for Shampoo, please," she whispered in my ear.
"Uh, OK," I gave in and took the glass. I examined it; it
seemed like normal water. It was a bit warm but I suppose she didn't
want me to splash it on her and get away from her again. I took another
look at it, then at Shampoo. She was smiling very happily.
"Here goes," I smiled to her. I put the glass up to my lips. My
heart was pounding, wondering what she had put in it. *BA-BUMP*
*BA-BUMP* *BA-BUMP* I began to tilt the glass so that I could drink
it.
"What are you doing in there with Shampoo, Jack!" I heard
Mousse's voice yell from outside the door. "Don't worry, Shampoo,
I'll save you from him!"
I heard a chicken cluck and something drop. The door flew
open in a huge explosion. When the smoke cleared, Mousse was the
only imagine that could be seen.
"Get away from her, you wretch!" Mousse yelled and threw
out a chain at me. It hit the glass and broke it. Water was all over my
arm and hand. Shampoo did not look happy.
"Mousse so stupid!" she walked up to him.
"Oh, Shampoo I'm so glad you're safe!" he went to hug a bag
of flour. Shampoo started to pound him into the floor.
"Mousse ruin moment!" she shouted and uppercut him
through the roof, making a huge hole.
"I love you, Shampoo!" he yelled as he went flying through
the air.
"What was in the water?" I asked.
"Oh, is nothing," she said and went out the door to get some
clothes. I shrugged and went to dry off my arm and hand.
******
We walked over to Furikan. Fortunately, it was lunch time. We
went into the cafeteria and saw Akane and Ranma arguing over
something again. We spotted Ken and sat down with him.
"Glad you remembered to come," he greeted us. "Want
something to eat?"
"No, thanks," Hanny answered. "We already ate."
"I suppose you want to go straight to the computer lab then,"
Ken reasoned.
"Yeah," I smiled.
He finished his lunch and showed us to the computer lab.
Mike and I took a computer next to each other. The keyboards had
katakana and hiragana as well as English keys on them. Ken had left to
do some homework or something.
We telneted to telnet.efn.org and got on. We hadn't checked
our e-mail for about two weeks. Mike had a few things from the
Highlander Mailing List. I had only two messages.
"Oh, yeah," I said, reading the first message. It was from Dan,
saying that he'd be coming to Japan also and that he already sent a
letter via air mail. "I almost forgot that Dan's coming tomorrow."
"Yeah, we're going to need to pick him up, aren't we?" Hanny
said, reading the message Dan wrote over my shoulder.
"No, we'll have my nanny do it," I said. I hit the N key and
read the second message. "Strange, this message is from
Mara@demon.net.666. I didn't know that you could have numbers as
the domain name."
From: Mara@demon.net.666 <Mara>
To: jackji@efn.org <Jack Ji>
Sub: Dream a little dream
Remember me, little Jacky? We've met in your dreams, just
wait till we meet in real life. C-ya.
Mara,
Demon, first class
"What the hell is this about?" Mike asked me. I was still
staring at the screen, ignoring the two heads above my shoulders.
"This may be more serious than I thought," I mumbled.
"What? What is this all about?" Hanny asked me. I explained
to them about my dream and what Cologne had told me.
"Wow, so ghosts really do exists," Mike said.
"No, not ghosts, DEMONS!" I shouted at him.
"Oh, sorry, I meant demons," Mike slouched in his chair again
and frowned. "So, does Cologne want us to battle demons or
something? Maybe this guy's playing a trick."
"Trust me, guys," I began, "this isn't a trick. I think we should
all be on the cautious side from now on. This demon might try to harm
you guys as well."
"Right, I guess we'll have to use our new skills when he comes
up," Mike said, a little skeptical. He then went back to reading his mail.
******
We were back in my nanny's house again. Mike got the rest of
the day off, just as I did to move our stuff to Tendo Training Hall. We
were packing our suitcases.
"Hey, I found my CD's!" I cheered. "My dad did remember to
pack them for me! Yes, now I can pump up NIN!"
"Oh, my ears hurt already," Hanny complained.
"Hanny, why is it that you hate stuff that's popular but like
stuff that sucks?" I asked.
"You like Sliders, just like me, don't you?" he shot back.
"Does that suck?"
"I guess you're right," I turned back to packing my stuff.
******
It only took us an hour to pack and get to Tendo Training Hall.
Kasumi, as always, greeted us with a smile and showed us the way in.
"I guess I'll see you boys tomorrow when we pick up your
friend," my nanny waved. "Behave yourselves here!" She drove off.
"C'mon, let's put all our luggage in our room," Hanny said.
We started carrying our heavy suit cases into our room. It
seemed so far away. I was tired from my training session earlier and
could hardly make it on the first trip. I went back, slowly to pick up my
last two suit cases. I picked them up and headed for our room again.
This time, I tripped and almost fell due to my fatigue but someone
prevented my fall.
"You should be a little more careful next time," they said. I
looked to my left and found Ranma taking one of my suit cases.
I smiled at him, "Thanks, Ranma."
"Well, I thought about what you said this morning and..." he
began.
"And?" I wanted him to continue.
"And I guess you're right," he looked away. "Partially,
anyway. I guess we could be friends, seeing how I ain't got too many
right now. I guess that is my thanks for getting Shampoo off my back."
"I hoped you would see it my way," I smiled.
"Just do me a favor and don't go spreadin' stuff about my
curse, alright?" he said.
"Sure, what are friends for," I replied. He then helped me carry
one of my suit cases to my room.
******
Dan Myrick awoke in a small room with a fire lit in the center.
He put on his glasses and saw that it was a hut built with wood and
leaves. A middle-aged man, looking like he was almost 50 years old,
was tending to the fire.
"Where am I?" he sat up.
"Ah, you are awake," the man said. "Lie back down, you still
need rest."
He did as he was told, "But where am I?"
"You are in a small island in the Pacific Ocean," he answered.
"You have been out for five hours now. You had a rather bad fall."
"Fall?" he asked. "That's right, I was on my trip to Japan and
then... I knew I shouldn't have bought that ticket on a discount airline!"
"Yes, I remember a similar thing happening to me," the figure
said. "Oh, my apologies. I have not introduced myself. I am Doug;
Doug Microsoft."
"Microsoft?" Dan looked at him strangely. "Same as Bill
Gate's Mircosoft?"
Hearing that name, a shimmering blue appeared around his
body and he replied, "Yes, Bill Gates. I remember him all too well."
"What's the history with you and him?"
"Bill Gates, Paul Allen and I were the original team that started
Microsoft," he answered. "I wanted our company to not only offer
software but martial arts as well."
"Martial arts?" Dan was starting to think he having a dream.
"Yes, but they both thought that it was unnecessary and
unuseful. I found it strange that one day they wanted me to go to Japan
and give a demonstration of my martial art."
"Your martial art? Did you make up your own?"
"Yes, I did. However, those two always thought it was stupid.
When they sent me to Japan, they had a private plane. The only other
person on it was the pilot and he was a hitman. They paid someone to
drop me in the middle of the ocean." He clenched his fists and pounded
the palm of his hand.
"Well, why didn't you just get a plane ticket and fly back?"
He was getting more upset, "Don't you think I would have if I
could have?"
"What do you mean?"
"This island is not on any map. No explorer has ever
discovered it. The natives have never seen a white man before except
me. There is no western influence here, no technology, no poverty, no
money or even guns."
"You mean I'm stuck here forever?"
"No, I'm not saying that. There is one way you can leave but if
you do leave I suggest you head for your original destination."
"OK, I want to prepare to leave now," Dan got up.
"You may leave only on one condition," he stated.
"What's that?"
"You will train in Microsoft School of Martial Arts for seven
days and seven nights and then you may leave and only after you take
an oath to seek vengeance for me."
"Sounds not too bad," Dan agreed to it. "But I don't have any
experience in martial arts but some of my friends do."
"Very well, you will start at sunrise, get a short break for
lunch, another one for dinner and then you will train deep into the
night."
"Ah, that's a lot of training," Dan's jaw dropped. "I think
staying here for the rest of my life doesn't sound too bad."
"If you do not train, you will be sacrificed to the volcano," he
said with the volcano in the background rumbling.
Dan swallowed the spit in his mouth, "OK, I think I'll start
tomorrow. Oh, I haven't told you my name yet. It's Dan; Dan Myrick."
"Good, nice to meet you, Dan," they shook hands. "Now, I
will show you a few weapons I developed for my martial art."
"You developed your own weapons?"
"Yes. I assume you are good with a computer?"
"Well, yeah, I am. Most of my friends always ask me question
regarding their computer problems. In fact, one of them always says
that if I don't know the solution, no one does."
"Excellent, you will make up for the lack of martial arts
experience with your computer knowledge."
"How will I do that?"
He smiled and opened a trapdoor in the floor, "This way"
In the little hole was a keyboard and three computer mouses.
They weren't normal computer accessories, however.
"This keyboard is actually a tonfa, or you might know it better
as a piton," he explained and gave handed him the larger than usual
keyboard with a handle at one end of it. He began again, "These
mouses are actually bolos." He brought them out also. The ends were
attached to one cord.
He swung them over his head, "These aren't regular mouses or
bolos. They'll wrap around the victim's entire body, not just their feet."
He threw it at Dan. Its cords extended and wrapped around him
entirely.
"I see, now could you free me up?" he struggled like a worm
on the ground.
Doug tapped all three mouse buttons and they contracted to
their original length, freeing Dan.
"Thanks," Dan said.
"No problem," he smiled. "All you have to do to release your
opponent is tap all three buttons."
He handed Dan the bolos also and he took a better look at
them. They had the MS insignia of Microsoft but with a Yin-Yang
symbol behind it.
Doug brought out a black 3.5 inch disk from the bottom of the
hole and shut the trap door, "Now this is something that I discovered
on this island. Is it made from a material the natives call GWANO." He
handed the disk to Dan, who almost cut himself on it.
"Be careful, it's very sharp," he warned. "This element is like
none I've ever heard of. It is made only by the volcano ants that live in
the volcano."
"There are ants that live in a VOLCANO here?"
"Yes, I don't think they can be found anywhere else in the
world, however. The properties of this element is very unique,
especially the disk you are holding in your hand."
"How is that?"
"Well, first off, it is from the nest of the queen. One of the
young warriors got a small amount of it during an initiation ceremony
and gave it to me as a gift. He is a very brave warrior."
"How does it coming from the queen make it more unique?"
"Well, it can duplicate itself," he answered rather bluntly. Dan
just stared at him and blinked blankly. "You don't believe me." He
smiled.
"Nope," Dan shook his head.
Doug took the disk from Dan and said, "Here, I'll show you."
He took the disk in his hand and with the other pulled out 4 other disks,
exactly the same as the other from it. "See? This disk will even work in
a computer since I put a few parts of a disk I had with me in it."
Dan was blinking in surprise, "Y-yes, I see. Thank you for
such a gift."
"I should be thanking you for learning. Now I am assured that
Microsoft School of Martial Arts will be passed on with you."
"Well, it's not like I have any choice here," Dan mumbled to
himself.
"We'll start tomorrow morning," Doug handed the original
disk back to Dan, who put it in his back pocket of his jeans.
******
Mike and Hanny were training with Tendo. I lied down in the
back yard and watched the clouds. It was another lovely day and,
fortunately, not too hot either.
Akane then joined me, "I heard about what you did."
"Oh, hi, Akane," I sat up. "I didn't notice you."
"Did you and Shampoo... Really..." she trailed off.
I smiled back at her, "No, I only lied to get rid of Ranma."
"Ranma sounded really jealous when he got home."
"Well, I'm not surprised. Did he tell you about my little
lecture?" She shook her head.
"Well, I gave him a lecture about his ego and what being a
martial artist is really about. Then Shampoo glomped onto me again
and he left immediately. I'm really glad that he wants to be friends
now."
"He doesn't have many real friends here, except maybe
Ukyou. Everyone else just wants to kill him or marry him."
"What about you? Aren't you his friend?"
She hesitated, "Well... I..."
"It's OK, I get the same way when Shampoo glomps on me.
Say, where's P-Chan?"
"Oh, he disappears sometimes but he always returns."
"Better hope he didn't get turned into bacon or a sandwich."
"Don't even say something like that!" she stood up
"Sorry. Well, I think I'll do some training also." I got up also.
"Want to spar with me today?" she offered. "I won't go easy
on you again."
I thought about it, "No, thanks, Akane. I think I'll just practice
my kata today."
"Can I watch you?"
"Ah, I'm not comfortable when people are watching me when
I'm doing a kata solo. Besides, you might want to observe my moves to
get an advantage when we do spar."
"Fine then, have it your way." She went back inside the dojo. I
decided to change into my gi to do my kata.
******
"Where are those CD's?" a miniature Mara looked through
Mike's bag. "Damn! This isn't the right bag either."
Mara had been spying on Jack all day. When she found out
about his CD's, she got an idea. She may not be able to mess with him
directly due that that old ghoul's ring but she could still do it indirectly.
"Ah! Here it is," she found them. "Nice selection: Aerosmith,
Nirvana, NIN and The Crow Soundtrack. Looks like Jack does have a
dark side. Ha-ha-ha-ha." She put a little symbol next to the company
logo on each CD.
"No one will ever notice or recognize this," she grinned.
"Jacky-baby, I'm gonna bring out your dark side!" She disappeared
after re-placing the CD's.
******
It was the next day and we were at the airport, waiting for
Dan's plane to arrive. When it did, we waited for a long time for him to
come out. When he didn't, we got a little worried.
Then, a man in a suit came up to us, "You must be Dan
Myrick's friends."
"Yes, we are. Who are you?" Mike asked.
"I am a representative from the flight company Mr. Myrick
took to his trip to Japan. I'm sorry, Mr. Myrick fell off the plane during
his trip to Japan.
"What?" the three of us shouted.
"How could have this happened?!" I grabbed him by the shirt.
"You people are so incompetent!"
"I'm sorry, sir," he said. "The toilet seat was loose and he fell
through while the plane was experiencing some turbulence. Please keep
this out of the newspapers. We'll be more than happy to compensate
for his family's loss. Please tell his family we'll pay $25,000 a year for
the rest of their lives for this accident if they decide not to sue or go
public about this. Have a nice day." He then left.
I was shocked. A flutter of emotions went through me. I never
lost a friend before. I sat down and started sobbing a little. I just sat
there, staring at the floor for the next few minutes.
"There, there, Jack," my nanny assured me. "Take it easy."
"Dan; he's gone," I said. "He'll never be back. Now w-who is
going to solve my computer problems!"
"You're unhappy because you won't have anyone to solve
your computer problems?" Hanny asked. He didn't care too much
since he didn't know Dan all that well.
"That's because you didn't know him!" Mike shouted at
Hanny. "I've known him for over 5 years!"
"I'm sorry, guys," Hanny said. "Come on, life goes on for us.
Let's go get something to eat."
"Yes, I'm sure eating something will help you two feel better,"
my nanny nodded.
******
"Here's three deluxe okonomiyaki, on the house," Ukyou
smiled and put down the three pans on our table.
"Thank you, Ukyou," Mike said. He was feeling a little better
now that he was near Ukyou. I think the loss of Dan hit Mike hardest
since he's known him longest. "You are such a nice person."
"No problem, Mike," she smiled again.
I ate my food almost as slowly as Mike did. Hanny was
helping Ukyou with cooking and serving. I had no appetite to eat.
******
"I think you should cheer Mike up," Hanny whispered.
"How?" she asked back.
"I think you should ask him out or agree if he asks you," he
suggested.
"What? I'd never cheat on my Ranchan," she said.
"Fine then. Think of it more like a get together," he said. "I'll
be there and probably Jack and Shampoo."
"Shampoo? Why are you bring that bimbo?"
"Jack will probably take the chance to ask Shampoo out," he
replied.
"Jack and Shampoo?" she asked.
"Yeah, I think Shampoo and Jack are... Good friends," he
answered.
"Fine, then," she agreed. "But it's only a get together,
remember that. It's only friends between him and I."
"That's fine with me," he smiled.
******
"Hey, Mike," I said to get his attention. "I think I'm going to
ask Shampoo to go ice skating with me this weekend. Maybe you
should ask Ukyou out and join us."
"I don't know, Jack," he frowned. "I'm not exactly in the
mood since... Dan is..."
"I know, Mike," I sigh slowly. "This will help you recover a
little. It'll be fun."
"That's right, you two," my nanny agreed. "You need to cheer
up and that's a good way to do it, especially in this summer heat."
Mike thought about this for a second, "Alright, I'll do it."
"And you'll do it right now!" I ordered.
"What?! Now?! No, way!" he protested.
"Yes, way," I smiled. I grabbed him by the arm and dragged
him to Ukyou.
"Do you two need something?" she smiled at Mike.
"Uh, yes, Mike wants something to ask you," I answered.
"U-Ukyou, would, ah, w-would y-you l-" he stuttered.
"I think Mike's ate a little too much okonomiyaki," I smiled. "I
think he wants to know if you'd like to join him at the skating ring this
weekend. I'll be there with Shampoo probably."
"Why are you bring that bouncy bimbo?" she asked,
clenching her fists.
"Shampoo is not a bimbo," argued. Ukyou was right about
Shampoo being bouncy, however.
"Oh yeah, every five minutes she says, "Shampoo no
understand,'" she said.
"That's because her Japanese isn't all that great," I shouted at
her. "She could kick your ass in speaking Chinese."
"You guys have been here for just a little while and look at
your Japanese," she shouted back at me. "It's really good for gaijin.
Even better than hers."
"You two stop it now," Hanny separated us. We were face to
face. Our noses were practically touching. "I think I'd better join you
four this weekend also." He looked at Ukyou and me.
"Then it's settle," I said. "The five of us will go ice skating and
meet at the local ice rink."
I looked at Mike. His eyes looked empty. He must have been
staring at Ukyou all this time. I didn't see what he saw in that chest-less
masculine chick. Heck, I don't think she can be even called a chick!
"Thanks for doing that for me, Jack," Mike thanked me.
"Oh, no problem," I said. "Even though, I don't know why
you were going to argue with Ukyou. Oh, you mean asking her out.
Sorry."
******
Dan's week had been pure hell. He had to go through rigorous
training with those ridiculous weapons. He even had to hunt down and
wrestle an alligator. When it ended, it was even worse.
"You have learned well, Dan," Doug said. "You may leave
now and return to your friends in Japan."
"Thank you for teaching me, sir" Dan faked a smile. "Just how
will I get to Japan?"
"Why, by raft, of course," Doug answered.
"Raft?" Dan's face faulted. "You want me to bring all these
weapons with me and raft to Japan. That'll take weeks!"
"Not really," Doug disagreed. "It'll only take two or three
days."
Dan was still not believing this, "How's that possible?"
"Well, the natives say that a little while off the shore of this
island, there is a portal. It's suppose to be magical and will take you
anywhere you want but it'll take a few days to get to the portal."
"A portal?" he shook his head. "Well, since it's been an
unbelievable week here so far, I might as well believe you. Good-bye."
"Don't forget to get revenge for me somehow!" Doug smiled
and waved Dan off.
The raft had some food and water on it as well as Dan's
weapons. The natives helped push the raft into to ocean and Dan was
off towards the portal.
A few hours after he left the island, Dan realized something,
"Hey, why didn't Doug use this portal in the first place and get the
revenge himself?!"
******
I got to Nekohanten a little earlier than I usually did. I did it not
just to hang out with Shampoo but because I was walking slower due to
the loss of Dan.
"Nihao, Jack!" Shampoo greeted me.
"Nihao, Shampoo-chan," I said back to her in a low depressing
voice. She had a concerned look on her face.
"Why Jack not happy?"
"I-I lost a friend yesterday," I said. I grabbed Shampoo's
hand. "It's the first time I've ever had to face anyone's death since my
grandfather died but I was too young to really remember or understand
what was going on."
"Shampoo sorry," she wrapped her arms around me. For
once, I didn't push her off or get nervous. The sweet sent of her hair
and the warmth of her body was so nice.
"I'm glad I have someone like you for times like these," I said,
a tear dropping down my cheek.
Shampoo wiped it from my cheek, "Jack no cry. If you cry,
make Shampoo cry also."
"You're right," I nodded. "I-I got to cheer up."
"Shampoo cheer Jack up," her head started going towards
mine. I backed away a bit, unused to this. Our lips touched and we
entered a deep passionate kiss. Her lips were so soft, moist and full of
warmth.
I ended the kiss, "Would you like to go ice skating this
weekend?"
"Aiyah! Jack take Shampoo on date!" she jumped in the air.
"Ranma never offer Shampoo to date. I so happy!"
"Yeah, Hanny will be there and Mike will be there with
Ukyou," I smiled.
She frowned, "Why you bringing Ukyou-baka?"
"Why not? It's not like you two are going after Ranma still,
right?" I reasoned.
Her frowned changed into a smile again, "Jack right again." I
then started work after Cologne yelled at us for loafing off.
******
"Today's training exercise will be a sparing match for you,"
Cologne said. I was out in the back again beginning my training session
after a busy lunch crowd.
"Great, am I sparring against Shampoo?" I asked.
"No, not yet," she shook her head. "You'll start with a lesser
opponent: MOUSSE!"
Instantly, Mousse jumped out of nowhere and threw a few
chains at me, "You shall pay for what you did to Shampoo!"
The chain wrapped around my right arm. Then he jumped up
and hit me over the head with a cookie sheet that he brought out of his
robes. He didn't even give me a chance to get my weapon. Everything
started getting black.
"Aiyah! Mousse hurt Jack!" was the last thing I heard.
******
I woke up, staring at the ceiling. Then a beautiful image of
Shampoo came in my view.
"Jack feel better, yes?" she asked.
"I feel fine," I sat up. I looked around and found out that I was
in Shampoo's room. My head was a little shaky but there were no
bumps.
"Did you beat up Mousse after I passed out?"
"Yes, Shampoo get vengeance for Jack."
"Thank you, but you didn't need to do that. He'll probably
blame it on me. Hey, how long have I been out?"
"Almost five hours now."
"FIVE HOURS?!"
"Jack have hearing problem?" she looked in my hear. I would
have taken this opportunity to cuddle up with Shampoo but I had to get
back to Tendo Dojo. "I got to get home, Shampoo-chan. Can you walk
me home?"
"Shampoo do what Jack say," she nodded. We walked outside
to see Cologne and a bandaged up Mousse.
"I see you are awake, young one," she said. "You recover fast.
That is good."
"Yes, Great-grandmother," I said. "I will be prepared next
time, however. I must leave now."
"Shampoo walk Jack home, Great-grandmother," she waved
as we walked out the door.
******
We were walking down the street towards Tendo Training
Hall. The sun was setting and we were holding hands. I don't know if I
had gotten used to Shampoo's affection or if it was the loss of Dan that
caused it.
<Jack, what is your name in Chinese?> she asked me in
Chinese. <I mean, Jack can't be your Chinese name.>
<Which one do you mean?>
<The one your parents always call you by,> she answered.
<Oh, that one is Jing-Jing. As in Tianjing.>
<A lot of people have that name> she sighed. <Do you
remember Tianjing?>
<Not much since I was only five when I left.>
<I miss China a lot. Do you ever wish you could go back?>
<No, I don't> I replied to her shock. <I can ALWAYS go back
but never have the funds or the time. If you mean if I ever wanted to go,
yes then. I miss it a lot.>
<If you go, will you take me with you?>
I thought about this for a second, <Of course I will.>
We reached the doors to Tendo Training Hall.
"Well, here we are," I turned to her. "Guess you'll have to go
now. See you tomorrow. Thanks for walking me back."
"Not problem. Shampoo enjoy more," she gave me a semi-
long good night kiss and left.
I sighed, "What a nice girl."
******
The next was quite
normal, for Nerima, anyway. After the lunch crowd, Cologne once
again had me go back to train.
"Today, I will teach you something new if you can prove
yourself ready," she said.
"Prove myself ready?" I repeated. "Is this a test of some sort?"
"It is more like a check point, young one," she replied. She
raised her hand, "Mousse!"
Instantly, Mousse popped out of nowhere and jumped at me
with chains, "You shall pay again, Jack!"
This time, however, I was ready for him.
******
Mousse's chain once again wrapped around Jack's arm. This
time, he made the mistake of not following up with an attack. Instead,
he tried to pull Jack towards him.
Jack grabbed his katana out of thin air and sliced the chain in
two. Mousse fell down but was quick to get up. Jack was already in the
air and his sword was pointing directly at Mousse's chest. He rolled out
of the way just in the nick of time.
"You have improved a little since yesterday," Mousse taunted.
He threw all of his chain, hooks, fishing lines and yo-yo's at him,
hoping some will wrap around him while some would cut him. Only a
few hit him since he dodged the majority of them while the others
either bounced off his chi shield or wrapped around his sheath that he
threw at the projectiles.
"Yesterday was a fluke!" he shouted at the surprised Mousse.
He had not known much about what Jack has been training in, let alone
his chi shield.
"W-when did you learn to do th-" he was stopped short by a
punch thrown by Jack, literally. He used the Air Drill technique to
attack from a distance.
"Now you'll see just how well I really fight!" he grabbed the
sheath out of thin air and threw it like a spear at the stunned Mousse.
Fortunately for him, Mousse was able to get out a pizza pan from his
robes to block the incoming attack. Mousse looked at the pizza pan,
which had a hole in it now. The sharp tip of the sheath came less than
an inch to his nose. When he tried to grab it for his own use, it
disappeared.
"I will never let you have Shampoo!" he shouted at Jack. He
grabbed out a chicken and threw some egg bombs at him. "Ha! I have
more surprises than you do."
Jack was engulfed in the smoke and dust. He couldn't see
anything and he could hardly breathe. He felt his shield wear down and
disappear. At the same instant that his chi shield disappeared, he felt
much weaker.
"Show *cough* yourself, Mousse!" he hacked into the smoke
with his sword. He felt a sharp pain in his left shoulder. A cold, hard
steel claw ripped.
"Now I have you!" Mousse shouted. Jack jumped out of the
smoke. While in the air, he punched many times at the cloud of smoke
and dust, trying to hit his blind opponent with the Air Drill again.
Suddenly, a chain from the smoke wrapped around Jack's leg
and pulled him down on his back. The smoke cleared and Mousse, now
without his robes, was holding on the other end of the chain.
"No more distant fighting," he said. "I finish this now." He
pulled the chain and dragged Jack to him, scarping him on the
pavement.
When Mousse stopped pulling, Jack cut the chain and stood
up, "Very well. Let's do it!" He pointed the sword at him. It had a glow
of a shimmering blue around it.
Jack sliced downward only to be block by Mousse's naginata,
a staff with a blade at one end. They each slice, hacked, spun, blocked,
dodged and kicked each other for several minutes.
"This ends now," Jack stated, nose to nose with Mousse. He
grabbed his sheath out of thin air and swatted Mousse's glasses off
while his other two hands where busy holding the naginata in a
blocking position.
"That was a dirty underhanded trick!" Mousse shouted. Jack
walked back a few feet. Mousse swung frantically in futile. Jack felt
some pity for this love-stricken fool but had to finish this now.
He punched at Mousse's nose using the Air Drill, drawing
blood. He then charged Mousse and kicked him in the stomach. He
dropped his naginata, went to one knee and held his stomach.
"Do you yield?" Jack asked, pointing his sword at Mousse's
head.
"I shall never give up my Shampoo!" he shouted.
"You fool, I have no other choice then," Jack shook his head.
He brought the sword up and swung it down, cutting off Mousse's
head in one swift swing, ending the match.
******
"Aiyah! Jack kill Mousse!" Shampoo yelled and walked over
to the headless corpse.
"You have fought well, young one," Cologne congratulated.
"Thank you, Great-grandmother," I said, panting. I sheathed
my katana and looked at Shampoo, who was looking over Mousse's
body.
"Why you doing that?" she asked me. I could tell she was
holding back a few tears.
"Because he didn't submit," I reasoned.
"But-but now Mousse never coming back," Shampoo
frowned.
"Yes, he will, child," Cologne said.
"Yeah, just watch," I smiled. "Mousse, heal up." Instantly, like
on slow motion replay, every drop of Mousse's blood went back to
where it was before. Every hair, drop of sweat, tear and molecule went
back exactly as it was. And then, Mousse's head reattached itself.
"How you doing that?" Shampoo pondered.
"Wh-what happened?" Mousse said, looking up at the sky
"You lost, that's what happened," I said, letting my weapons
disappear.
"I thought you cut off my head," he looked at me. "But I must
have only passed out."
"Mousse so stupid," Shampoo stood up and walked over to
me. "Come inside. Shampoo help patch you up."
"I did decapitate you," I said. "You wouldn't give up so I
ended the fight that way. You're lucky I can undo the damage I've
done with my swords."
Shampoo then walked me inside and applied anti-infectants,
band aids and patches on my wounds. Then, Cologne summoned me
outside again.
******
"You wanted me to come out again, Great-grandmother?" I
asked, peeking my head out the door. Mousse was still out there.
"Yes, young one," she nodded. "Since you have taken a small
step today in beating Mousse, I will teach you another chi technique."
"Thank you, Great-grandmother," I bowed.
"You noticed how your shield disappeared after many hits to
it, ne?" she asked. I only nodded my reply. "That is because it wore
down and used up all your internal chi supply. Did you not feel a little
weaker and more tired afterwards? I will teach you a way to recharge up
your chi quicker by draining it from someone else."
"Draining someone else's internal chi?" I questioned.
"Yes, now watch carefully," she spread out her arms and
looked at Mousse. Then, Mousse had a blue-green aura over him and it
began to move towards Cologne.
"What are you doing, you old ghoul!" Mousse charged up to
Cologne but stopped after one step, too tired to go on. "I need *pant* a
little rest." He fell flat on his face.
"Hey, that's a lot like that Hinako thing with the Happo-go-en-
sa-tsu thingy," I said.
"It is similar but not exactly the same," she turned to me. I
could see a slight shimmer of the same green-blue color going off
around Cologne's body. It looked like heat loss. "Her technique needs a
certain metabolism and a circular object. Not only that, but there is a
difference in what she drains. This technique drains their main chi; their
essence of life, to be exact. If you drain too much, they will pass out. If
you drain more, they can die."
"Wow, that's dangerous," I said.
"Not only is it dangerous for your opponent," she went on,
"but yourself as well if you drain too much. That is because you might
explode. You can take a little more chi than your chi/body mass ratio
can handle but not too much."
"Uh, yeah, Great-grandmother," I scratched my head. "So
how do I do this?"
"Well, you first, have to find a point on your opponent," she
explained. "The chest is the preferred place. Then you have to focus on
that point as well as one on yours. You then spread your arms, and
concentrate on draining their chi. Just think of sucking juice out of a
squirt bottle."
"That's a good analogy, Great-grandmother," I praised her.
"May I try on Mousse?"
"Oh, yes, of course," she smiled. "He's expendable." She then
shot back a little of the chi she took and gave it to him. "You can even
transfer chi but that's too complex for you to learn right now, young
one. Now try it."
Mousse started getting up. I focused on a point between his
nipples, in that valley-like dent in his chest. I then shut my eyes and
spread out my arms. A squirt bottle appeared in my mind, with the label
of "Mousse" on it. Then I pictured myself squeezing that bottle and
getting as much water out of it as possible.
Then, I felt it. It felt like a second wind had come to me. I felt
so energetic and so lively. It was like I just drank Gaderaid or
something. I opened my eyes to see Mousse lying down on his face.
There was a small steady stream of blue-green aura coming to me.
I lowered my arms and the stream stopped. I felt so much
better. I looked at the cuts and wounds on my arms. They were all
healed up now.
"You have learned well, young one," she smiled at me. "I shall
tell you more in detail of chi draining and their effects another time."
I picked up Mousse, and dragged him back into the restaurant
with me. He was mumbling "Shampoo" the entire time.
******
"Nice to have a day off, eh?" I asked Mike, who was sitting
next to me. We were sitting in the cool waters of the pond in the back
yard to get away from the heat.
"Yeah," Mike just frowned. He hadn't smiled much since the
loss of Dan. It was hard on both of us but more on Mike than me.
"Well, it was nice of our employers to give us all the same day
off," Hanny said.
"Yeah, I think they all think we needed time to let... Our loss
sink in," I looked down at my feet.
"RANMA NO BAKA!" Akane shouted.
"Incoming," Hanny said as all three of us got out.
"Ahhhhhh!!!!" Ranma fell into the pond.
"Man, that's the sixth time today!" I said to Ranma-chan.
"It's not my fault that macho chick is so violent," she said.
"Maybe if you didn't make her, she wouldn't be so violent," I
reasoned.
"Say, Ranma, doesn't it really suck to have breasts in this
heat?" Hanny asked.
"Ah, well, you get used to it," she said. "I'm going to change
back into a guy." He stomped back into the house.
"Man, we need to go to a pool or the beach," Hanny said.
"Yeah, that'll be nice," Mike smiled a little. "I wouldn't mind
seeing Ukyou in a bathing suit."
"I wouldn't care," I said. "There's probably nothing to look at
if she did."
"Shut up," Mike frowned at me. "At least she won't turn into
a cat when she goes swimming."
"Eek!" Ranma-chan screamed. "Get away from me, you old
lech!"
Ranma booted someone or something into the air and it
landed right in the middle of our pool. It appeared to be a really small
old man.
"Hey, this guy is the same guy that gave me my staff," Mike
picked him up with one hand. "That's Happosai!"
"You pervert!" Ranma stomped out. "I'm gonna-" He stopped
short due to a bucket of water hitting him.
"Ah, my Ranma-chan," Happosai glomped onto Ranma-chan
and fondled her everywhere.
"Wow, I didn't even feel him get out of my grasp," Mike
looked at his empty hand.
"Ahh!" she booted him towards us. Hanny shot up the barrier
between his beams and Happosai's head hit it, HARD.
"Now I got to take another bath!" she stomped out again.
"So you're that Happosai we've heard about," I said.
"M-must h-have panties," he said. Hanny was pressing him
against the ground with his barrier
"Let me correct myself, you must be that PERVERTED
Happosai we've heard about," I said.
"Yeah," Hanny said. He flipped him on the barrier, like it was
okonomiyaki and threw him high in the air. When he started coming
down again, I used my Air Drill technique and uppercut him into orbit
without even touching him.
"Oh, you have bashed our master," Tendo came up to us with
Saotome-panda.
<Thank you so much,> he wrote on a sigh.
"We are very grateful!" he started weeping.
"Uh, yeah, you're welcome," I said, looking at them strangely.
"Anytime," Hanny smiled. We went back to the pond.
******
"I want you to prove yourself once again, young one,"
Cologne said to me. It was another normal day at Nerima and work and
she was training me again at the back of Nekohanten again.
"Yes, Great-grandmother," I sighed.
"Do not be so unhappy," she told me. "You will be fighting
Shampoo today."
"Shampoo?" I summoned my sword and sheath.
"Shampoo no like to lose," she appeared out of nowhere and
pointed her bonbori at me.
"Very well, Shampoo," I bowed to her, showing my respect.
"I'll try not to hurt you too much. Let's do it!"
******
"Why you not using blade?" Shampoo asked Jack about why
he didn't unsheathe his sword.
"I told you, I really don't want to you hurt you," he said. He
jumped in the air and went for a jump kick, "I'm going to end this
quickly."
Shampoo brushed the attack away with one swipe of her
bonbori. Jack went flying to a wall but regained a little control so he
could hit the wall feet first and bounce back.
He went flying back at Shampoo, fist first only to punch a
bonbori. He landed on his feet and kneeled down, holding his now
broken hand.
"Shampoo sorry to hurt Jack," she said. "Shampoo end now."
She swung the bonbori at Jack's head but he blocked it with his sword,
which was still in its sheath. She swung with other one but he swept her
off her feet.
"Like staring at the sky?" he asked.
"Shampoo no lose!" she kicked straight up. Jack easily moved
out of the way and grabbed her leg. Without a thought, he twisted it and
kicked her knee. Shampoo saved herself by sweeping Jack's legs.
She stumbled up to her feet and tried not to limp on her bad
leg. Jack simply rolled away and got up. When he looked up, there was
a bonbori flying at his face. Quickly, he unsheathed his sword and
threw the sheath to deflect it.
"Now Shampoo make Jack really fight," she pointed her other
bonbori at him.
"Very well," he only stared at her. He did a series of punches
and kicks toward her using the Air Drill again. He preferred fighting at a
distance but when it came down to it, he knew that the only way to win
was close combat.
Shampoo tried to block the invisible attacks but couldn't figure
out where they'd go. She didn't want to hurt Jack nor get herself hurt
but she did not want to lose in front of him and Cologne. She coughed
up blood and held her stomach.
Suddenly, Jack was in the air with a jump kick heading right
for her. She put up her bonbori in a futile attempt to block the attack
again but he split it in half. The impact of the kick to her stomach
wasn't as bad as it would have been if the bonbori didn't take the
beginning impact.
They went into a short melee. Shampoo was on the defensive
mostly but got a few good punches and kicks in but Jack had the
weapon, even though it was in his left hand due to the injury of the
other, and forced Shampoo to dodge and go where he wanted her to.
Not only did he have the weapon, he had his chi shield still up.
Shampoo would try to punch but only her herself more than Jack
because of the impact with the shield.
Then, he kicked her right in the stomach with a spinning
round-house kick and crush some of her ribs. Then he used the extra
momentum to kick the same knee he had injured before. Shampoo held
her stomach and dropped to one knee.
"Do you yield?" he pointed the tip of his sword at her.
"Shampoo *cough* never give up," she refused.
"You foolish little girl," she swung his sword up.
"No!" Mousse shouted. Jack pointed the sword downward
and held it with both hands in front of his chest. He then concentrated
on her chest area, which was a little hard at first, and thought about a
squirt bottle with the label of "Shampoo" on it. Then he imagined
squeezing that bottle and drinking it.
Shampoo had a blue-green aura appear around her. It then
began to move towards Jack and soon touched him. He could feel his
chi shield charge up back to full, he felt his energy and liveliness come
back and his wounds started healing up.
"Shampoo... never give... up," she passed out, most the chi of
her drained into Jack.
******
"Congratulation, young son-in-law," Cologne congratulated.
"No, you must die for this, Jack!" Mousse jumped at me. I
was still pumped up from the fight so I just thrust my sword into his gut
without even thinking. "N-not again." He fell down on the ground.
"Oops, sorry," I said. "Heal back up again, Mousse." Instantly,
the blood on the sword and the ground went back into his gut like on
slow-motion play back.
He stood up, "I shall get revenge for her some other time."
"You have done well, young son-in-law," Cologne said.
I turned to her, "What did you call me?"
"Young son-in-law," she said.
"SON-IN-LAW?!" I shouted.
"Yes, you have beaten Shampoo and you are an outsider to
our village so you must now marry her," she explained.
"Oh, come on," I whined. "Isn't all of China just one big
village?"
"Do not try to get yourself out of this, young son-in-law," she
said. "You are engaged to Shampoo now. It's right here in our laws."
She threw me a red book with Chinese written on it.
"Hmm... Two male outsiders something female something
something fight something for her?!" I read what I could read out loud.
"I have to fight Ranma and the winner gets her?"
"No, it only says it can be settled with a fight," she explained.
"The two males must make an agreement on who gets to marry her. If
there is no agreement, then they must fight. It could be that the loser
has to marry her."
At this point, Shampoo came to, "Aiyah! You I love!" She
glomped onto me and kissed me passionately on the lips. It seemed that
she healed up pretty quickly. "Jack now groom."
"No, I'm not," I said, pushing her lips away from mine. "This
law is ancient. I'm not following it. My parents would kill me if I did."
She began to cry, "Groom not like Shampoo?" She got to me
again with cry tears.
"Oh, I'm sorry, Shampoo-chan," I apologized. "OK, I'll talk
with Ranma about this and maybe we'll get an agreement."
******
"That's GREAT!" Ranma jumped in the air. "Finally,
Shampoo can get out of my hair!"
I chuckled, "You don't know how funny that sounds.
Anyway, do we agree that you'll give up Shampoo and that I'm her
official fiancee?" I reached out my hand for him to shake on it.
He grasped my hand and shook it, "Definitely! She's all yours,
Jack!"
"Oh, I'm so happy," Tendo came up to me in tears. "You have
beridden one of Ranma's fiancee's. You also bashed our master, how
can I ever repay you?"
"I'm still here!" Happosai, who was carrying a bag, zipped
across the room and whacked Tendo over the head with his pipe.
"Then it is settled," I turned to see Cologne. "Jack is now
Shampoo's official fiancee."
Akane walked in with P-Chan in her arms, "That's great!
Finally that Chinese bimbo can stop bothering Ranma."
I started getting mad, "Why does everyone call her a bimbo
just because her Japanese sucks?!"
"That's right, Akane," Kasumi said. "Ladies do not call each
other those words."
"But she's not a lady," Akane argued.
"If you ask me, neither are you," Ranma talked before he
thought. Instantly, Akane grabbed her mallet out of nowhere and
dropped P-Chan, who ran away, to bash him over the head. Then she
sent him flying.
******
"Wee!" Mike jumped up in the air, tried to do a spin and
landed on his butt. We were at the local ice rink. I was so glad since it
was about 100 degrees outside.
Hanny was just going all over the place since he didn't have a
date. Mike was having a good time being near Ukyou and seemed to
forget about Dan. I was surprised that Ukyou and Shampoo didn't try
to kill each other.
"Shampoo not having much practice skating," Shampoo held
my hand. It appears that Shampoo didn't skate much but she knew
somewhat how to skate.
"Don't be afraid," I assured her. "I'm right here to catch you."
"So cute! So cute!" a little girl with long brown hair skated up
to Ukyou and snatched her ribbon. Ukyou went spinning all over the
place. "Angelette! Angelette! Widdle Azusa take widdle Angelette
home with her."
Mike skated up to her and pointed his staff at her, "What do
you think you're doing, thief?"
Hanny skated up to her as well, swords pointing at her, "Yeah,
give that back."
I sighed and skated up, katana pointing at her also, "That's
right, it's not yours."
She didn't notice that she was surrounded by us and could
have been totally wasted. She was just into her newly found ribbon.
"Do you want to see widdle Angelette?"
"No, we don't!" Mike shouted. "Give it back to widd- I mean
Ukyou!"
"That's alright, Mike," Ukyou skated up to him. She had her
hair all the way down and around her body. Mike started drooling
again. She whipped out another ribbon, only to have Azusa try to steal
it too.
"I don't think so," Mike swatted her hand.
"What going on here?" Shampoo skated up to me.
"Widdle Azusa is trying to get widdle Robert," she pointed at
the ribbon.
"Why you talking like Shampoo?" she asked.
"Widdle Azusa isn't talking like Shampoo," she disagreed.
"Shampoo talks like widdle Azusa."
"Please forgive my partner," some guy skated up and grabbed
the ribbon out of Azusa's hands. "She has a habit of taking cute
things." He started to hand the ribbon back to Ukyou but Mike caught it
and finished the job for him.
"My name is Mikado Sanzenin," he informed us. "This is
Azusa-" A chair hit him over the head.
"Give widdle Azusa back her widdle Angelette!" she
continued to bash him over the head with the chain. After the chair
became unusable, she used a fire extinguisher.
"Oh well," I shrugged. "C'mon, let's get away from these
weirdo's."
******
I sat down to take a break from skating. Hanny joined me in
our little rest and brought two Coke's along with him.
"Sure is nice to cool off in this heat," he took a sip.
"Yeah, but it's too bad they don't have Pepsi in Japan," I
sighed. I watched Shampoo skate all by herself. She was so graceful, so
cheery and so, so, beautiful. That was the first time I realized how pretty
she really was.
"So how are you going to get out of your engagement to her?"
"I don't think I want to now," I said.
Hanny almost jumped out of his seat, "What?! Your parents
will kill you for getting engaged at this age! They don't even let you
date, for crying out loud!"
"I know, I know," I said. "But she has a lot of features they'll
probably like. For one thing, she's Chinese and speaks it. She's pretty
and she's a very nice person."
"Uh-oh. Sounds like you're in love, Jack," he teased.
I blushed, "No, I'm not. I only like her as a friend!"
"Oh, then how come you so easily accepted your
engagement? C'mon, Jack, we all know the first sign of love is denial."
I only kept silent after hearing that. Maybe it was true, maybe I
was in love with Shampoo now. Or maybe, it's just hormonal.
******
Mara walked into a seedy looking bar. There were about fifteen
people in there, most of them drunk and out of work. The perfect place
for her to pick out a few "volunteers."
She stood on a stood, "Listen up, everybody. You're all under
my control!"
"Ah, go away, lady!"
She then sprayed some breath freshener into her mouth and
spoke again, "I said, you are all under my control!"
They all looked up at her with blank eyes, "Yes, master."
"Good," he grinned, "I want you all to do something tonight
for me."
"You command, I obey," they chanted.
Mara brought out a globe. It showed Jack and Shampoo
walking arm and arm with their friends to Ucchan's, "I want you to
steal either this girl or this man's ring. All of you shall do that, right
now!" She ordered them. They all left in a zombie-like order, out to do
Mara's bidding.
******
A small tea pot fell on a roof top. Ryouga put his clothes on
and sigh, "Sweet Akane, I will be remember only as your pet P-Chan.
Now that Ranma has one less fiancee, our chances of happiness have
been reduced. Please forgive me for leaving you."
He jumped off the roof, right into a group of kids having a
water gun fight, and turned back into P-Chan. Why did it always have
to happen to him?
*****
"Oh, look," I said, pointing to a little black piglet. We were
walking over to Ucchan's for dinner and passed by a few kids having a
squirt gun fight."Isn't that P-Chan?"
"I don't know," Hanny said. "There could be a lot of little
black pigs around here."
"I think it is P-Chan," Ukyou went to pick it up.
"Bwee!" he hunched its back.
"I think it might be rabid!" I screamed. I pulled out my sword,
"Mad pig! Kill it!"
"Wait! No killing that pig!" Shampoo called behind me.
I hacked away but it hopped away over a wall. I looked down
at my feet and found a backpack with a bamboo umbrella and some
wet clothes. Maybe that was someone who had been to Jusenkyou also.
******
We finished a great dinner at Ucchan's and started walking
home. Mike and Hanny headed back to Tendo Training Hall while I
walked Shampoo back to Nekohanten.
We turned what we thought was a corner but actually was an
alley. We turned around to find five men, all holding broken bottles or
baseball bats. We backed away to find more men carrying crow-bars,
chains and brass knuckles
"Hey, we don't want any trouble," I warned them
"Your girl, your ring or your money," they told us.
I looked at Shampoo and then at my jade ring. "You want my
girl or my ring or my money? You got it! You can have her, she doesn't
mean a thing to me!" I pushed Shampoo into the group of ten and ran
past the five and around the building.
"Why you leaving Shampoo!" she cried out for me.
******
"You're girl, your ring or your money," they had said. Mara,
who was observing this from the top of a building, smacked her head
and shook it. So incompetent, but they at least got the girl and ring part
right.
"You can have her, she doesn't mean a thing to me!" Jack
yelled and ran off.
"What the..." Mara looked up. Jack had really left Shampoo.
Now her plans were ruined. She looked at Shampoo, who tried to fight
off her attackers but they were too strong and too many of them.
"Good thing I used the strength adding spray to it," she
smiled. They now were all over Shampoo. Four of them pinned down
one each of her appendages. This would be fun to watch.
******
I ran as fast as I could. I hadn't had much practice running up
fire escapes lately. Finally I reached the top of a building and looked
down. Shampoo was pinned down by four of the thugs. It looked like
they were about to rape her.
"How come she didn't fight them off?" I mumbled to myself.
Then, I heard someone giggling. I looked across the gap and saw a
blonde figure; one that looked familiar.
"Yes!" he said to himself, loud enough for me to hear him. I
then realized this was the demon that was messing with me when I saw
the V shaped marking on his forehead.
"Die, demon!" I said to him. I threw my sheath at her, hoping
it was pierce through his heart, killing him.
"What the- Ack!" she dodged the weapon but it cut the top of
her arm. "Jack! I thought you ran off. Now is not the time for us to
meet. I am unprepared, I shall see thee later! Ha-ha-ha-ha!" She
disappeared before I could jump across to his building.
"Aiyah! Jack come back to help Shampoo!" she screamed. I
then realized I left Shampoo in her situation.
I spotted out some guy who was fondling her breasts and
starting to pull her pants down. I aimed carefully for his head and
punched, using Air Drill. It knocked him out.
I then started doing it to the next guy and the next.
Unfortunately for Shampoo and me, there were too many for me to
handle because one of them ripped her pants and pulled down her
underwear.
I jumped down back into the alley. I had no other choice if I
were to save her. I swooped down and cut off the guy's head with my
sword. Some guys pounded a chain into my hand and shattered the
jade ring. With a careful spin, I took him out along with the four guys
pinning Shampoo down. The rest ran away from me; fleeing for their
lives.
I caught my breath and turned to Shampoo. She was trying to
hold back tears but lost control of herself and started crying. I let go of
my katana and cuddled up to her.
<I-I thought you really left me,> she wept in my arms.
<It's OK. I'm back now,> I assured her. I rocked her in my
arms. <I only used the element of unpredictablity taught by my sensei
in America.>
<I-I was never mo-more afraid in my life,> she buried her head
my in chest.
<I know, I know,> I nodded. <I'm sorry I had to leave you like
that. I was going to surprise them from above but... Something
distracted me.>
<Promise me you won't ever leave me like that again.>
<OK, I promise. C'mon, let's go to Nekohanten.>
******
"Shampoo was WHAT?!" Mousse yelled at me.
"She wasn't anything, Mousse," I told him. "She was
attacked, I ran off to surprise them from above but that demon was
there and slowed me down."
"What has happened to your ring?" Cologne asked me.
"One of the thugs broke it," I answered.
"You must be more careful now," she said. "That demon
couldn't hurt you due to that ring. You are free and in the open now."
"How can you let that happen to Shampoo!" Mousse yelled at
me again. "I would never let that happen!"
"Mousse, shut up," I said.
"Shampoo want groom help her to her room," she said.
"OK, Shampoo-chan," I agreed. "I'll even stay over tonight if
you want me to."
"No! I shall not allow it!" Mousse protested.
Cologne tapped his neck, causing him to fall asleep, "Good
night, Mousse. Good night, young son-in-law."
******
"It very strange," Shampoo said, changing into her pajamas.
"They very strong. Shampoo not strong enough to fight them."
"I know," I said. "They probably got some spell from that
demon. Did-did they hurt you?"
"No, Shampoo alright now," she smiled. "I happy that Jack
save her."
I looked at a tray of cookies on the floor, "Hey, I didn't know
you knew how to make chocolate cookies. These are my favorite!"
"Wife make for groom," she smiled. "Shampoo show she
good wife."
I practically inhaled all of them, "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't leave
any for you."
"Is OK, Shampoo make all for you," she smiled again.
I burped, "Excuse me." The burp made me realize that they
tasted different. They still tasted sweet but with something extra in it.
"Shampoo put Passion Spice in cookies," she smiled. "This
help groom be less shy when near Shampoo."
"Passion Spice?" I repeated. I felt my heart pumping faster, I
felt myself needing to glomp onto Shampoo. *BA-BUMP*, *BA-
BUMP* *BA-BUMP* *BUMP-BUMP-BUMP* "Got to resist this." I
couldn't think of anything else to do except push ups.
"No doing that to floor!" Shampoo said. "Doing to
Shampoo!"
"Forget this, I'm leaving," I headed out the door but Shampoo
blocked my path. I glomped onto her, "Oh, Shampoo-chan! Help me!"
"No leaving," she ordered. "That Passion Spice is super lust
flavor. Only cooker of food can help victim.
"Help me, Shampoo-chan!" I gave in.
End Part VII
Finished 6/2
Author's notes: So, I don't know how to spell Gaderaid! Wow, this is
what? A 75k fanfic? So, I'm not going to put in what happened to Jack
and Shampoo. I'm going to start part VIII with what happens in the
morning. If you really, really want to read what happens between Jack
and Shampoo, e-mail me jackji@efn.org with a request. It's a hentai
lemon side story.
OK, so, do you think I over-did it with the mugging scene? Oh well,
what did you think of the fight scenes? Should I just do "So and so beat
so and so" instead of all that? Do you think I'm overdoing it with all
this training? Did I make it kinda obvious who the last Horsemen is
going to be? Did you guys think there would be a big confrontation
with Mikado at the skating rink?
If I'm right, a bolos is a thing that is used to wrap around people's legs
and Batman uses them. I looked in the dictionary but it didn't sound
like the same one I was thinking of. Do you think Dan's computer
weapons are a little stupid? Oh, well, thanks for letting me put you in
my story, Dan!
A note on the names that Azusa was saying. Angelette was the best I
could spell it. It's suppose to sound like AN-Hel-Leat and Robert was
suppose to be like the French version of it, more like Raw-Bear. Hey, I
take Spanish, not French, OK? ^_^ I got the idea of the slight similarity
of how Azusa and Shampoo speak from a post on the FF ML.
Part VIII: Gee, I wonder who the Fourth Horsemen is going to be?
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Member of the #ShAS#: Shampoo Appreciation Society - Our favorite femaline!
jackji@efn.org - Jack Ji - http://www.efn.org/~jackji