Chinese Samurai
				By Jack Ji
			Part VI: Loki, the trickster
	I sank down into the tub until the water reached my chin. It 
was very relaxing to soak in a warm bath while hearing rain fall on the 
roof. Having two friends just get out of the tub made it a little icky, 
though.
	I thought about what I'm going to do with Ranma-chan on our 
date. She'll probably back out at the last minute but I'm not going to let 
her do that. I started making a plan in my head.
	I got out, dried myself and changed back into my clothes. 
Hanny and Mike were in the changing room taking their time getting 
their clothes on.
	"You guys left an icky mess in the tub," I said to them.
	"So, why do you believe that story of Dr. Tofu's?" Mike asked 
me, ignoring my comment on the tub.
	"You see..." I sat down. "I don't know how to begin. He told 
you about the curse, right?"
	"Yeah," Mike replied.
	"How do you know about them?" Hanny asked.
	"Shampoo told me about them," I answered. "Being from 
China, and having Cologne for her Great-grandmother, she knows all 
too well about Jusenkyo. She told me about Saotome-san's curse."
	"I still don't believe it," Hanny crossed his arms.
	"Fine, then," I shot back, "I'll show you guys. Come on." We 
walked out of the changing room, heading towards the kitchen. We saw 
Kasumi there, finishing making dinner.
	"If you boys are hungry," she began, "dinner will be ready 
soon." She smiled.
	"Oh, we're not here to check up on food," I said, looking at 
what she already prepared. It looked wonderful! Our tongues started 
hanging out. I came back to my senses. "I need a glass of warm water."
	"Oh, what do you need that for?" she asked. I had to think of 
something quick
	"Mike needs some warm water to... uh... get some... grease off 
his shoe," Hanny lied. "You know how impossible to get grease off 
with cold water."
	"Yeah, that's it," I nodded in agreement with him.
	"Well, that's OK then," she smiled to us again. She got a glass 
out of a cupboard, filled it with warm water and handed it to Mike. We 
left to kitchen quickly.
	"Good thinking, Hanny," I congratulated him. "It was a little 
corny though."
	"Hey, that clueless Kasumi fell for it," Hanny said. We walked 
over to Saotome-panda.
	"Hey, Mr. Saotome," I began, "could you come over here for 
a second?"
	<I'm just a regular panda!> he wrote on a sign. I got behind 
him and pushed him over towards the door to the back yard.
	"Oh, really then?" I asked. I grabbed the glass of water from 
Hanny's hands and splashed it on his face. Instantly, he changed from a 
panda to a man. A very naked man to be exactly.
	<Ack!> he popped out another sign, forgetting that he's a man 
again. He quickly jumped outside into the rain.
	"See, I told you so," I turned around at them. Their chins were 
practically on the floor. I guess I should have been a little more subtle 
about this.
	"That-that-that-," Mike stuttered. "I-I guess Dr. Tofu was 
telling the truth.
	"Yeah, he was," I nodded.
	"I don't believe it!" Hanny rubbed his eyes. "Can we do that 
again?"
	<No!> Saotome-panda whacked him with his sign. He flipped 
it around, <Promise to keep this a secret.> He was begging. Luckily, no 
one was in the room except for the four of us. It was a horrible sight 
seeing a grown panda begging on his hands and knees.
	"Of course we won't," I answered for the still shocked Mike 
and Hanny. "Why would we make this go public?"
	<Do you three swear on warrior's honor?> he held up a sign 
again.
	"What warrior's honor?" Mike questioned. "We aren't 
warriors."
	<Just promise not to tell anyone, especially my wife!> he spun 
the sign around again.
	"Dinner's ready!" Kasumi called from outside the kitchen.
	"Yeah, yeah, whatever," I babbled. "We'll keep it a secret 
from your wife." I was eager to get something to eat, as was Saotome-
panda, Mike and Hanny. We all went to eat dinner.
			******
	Mara finally woke up. If it wasn't for that big storm in Tokyo, 
she'd still be asleep, resting from her little incident with Jack's dream. 
Even with the storm many miles away, it still helped her recover a little.
	"Down to business," she said, getting out of her coffin. She 
was still a little groggy from a few days ago. She conjured up her usual 
clothes and began to make a new plan. Not for tonight, for she was too 
weak, but the next night, when she'd be fully recovered from her shock.
	"You'd better be ready, Jack!" she shouted. "Hahahahahaha- 
Ow. My head. I think I'd better lie down a little bit longer."
			******
	"This sure is some storm," Hanny mentioned while drying a 
plate.
	"I kind of like it," I said, receiving the same plate and putting it 
on the drying rack. "It reminds me of home; of when I'd go to bed 
listening to the rain drops on the roof. It relaxes me so much."
	"Thank you for helping me with the dishes," Kasumi said, 
getting another pile of dishes from outside to us.
	"It's nothing," Mike responded. "You made a great dinner 
tonight." It was true. She had made a great dinner. Even though, I 
couldn't pronounce half the stuff she cooked, nor did I know what it 
was. It still tasted great.
	Dinner had gone uneventful, other than Saotome-panda and 
Ranma getting a fight over the last piece of just about everything. 
Akane sat a little bit away from the table, feeding P-Chan. It disgusted 
me a little seeing her use her chop sticks to feed a pig. I had taken some 
of the pills Cologne gave me. My back felt even better; like I just got a 
massage.
	"Hey, shouldn't you take off your ring?" Hanny asked me.
	"I totally forgot about it," I said, taking a look at it. It was 
green still and was not even one bit wet. "This is strange, my ring is 
firmly on my finger but it feels very loose and comfortable."
	"Ring?" Mike peeked over Hanny's shoulder. "When did you 
get a ring and from who?"
	"I got it from Cologne," I answered. "She told me never to 
take it off. It's some sort of a good luck charm. Speaking of things from 
Cologne, how come you don't take off your wrist bands? You don't 
want one of those gems to fall down the sink."
	"Wrist bands?" Mike started getting jealous. "She gave you 
wrist bands and you a ring? Why don't I get anything special?"
	"There, there, Michael," Kasumi assured him. "I'm sure you'll 
get something from Cologne soon."
	"Well, my wrist bands are a little hard to get off," I looked at 
them. "Besides that, I hardly feel them on. It's as if it has become 
another body part or something."
	"Oh, my, you have a very lovely ring, Jack," Kasumi 
complimented me. "What does that say on there?" She pointed to the 
Chinese inscription on my ring.
	"I don't know," I shrugged. "I'll ask my nanny tomorrow."
	The three of us finished the rest of the dishes a little while 
after. Every had already gone to bed. Kasumi showed us the spare guest 
room. Well, spare is the right word for it. It had NOTHING except three 
futons and three pillows.
	"Don't forget to wake us up around eight or eight-thirty 
tomorrow," Mike reminded Kasumi. "We have to get to work early in 
the morning."
	"At least two of us," I added. "Hanny doesn't have to go to 
Ucchan's until the afternoon."
	"Shut up!" Hanny smacked the back of my head. "Ukyou has 
to go to school, that's the reason." Mike looked up and started 
daydreaming after hearing Ukyou's name again.
	"I won't forget," she said. "Good night." She shut the door.
			******
	"Yo! Wake up you three!" a rude voice shouted. I opened my 
eyes. It was Ranma.
	"Huh? Just five more minutes, mom," Mike mumbled.
	"I ain't your mom!" Ranma shouted. He grabbed a bucket of 
water and poured it on Mike and Hanny. I was fortunate enough to get 
sit up and roll out of the way.
	"Ack! Is this how you always wake up guests?" Hanny 
shouted at him.
	"Hey, Kasumi told me to wake the three of you up," he said, 
heading for the door. "But she didn't tell me how. I got to get to school 
now. See ya."
	"What an arrogant little punk," I mumbled under my breath.
	We got up, and went outside to get some breakfast. There were 
some empty plates on the table already. I could tell that everyone had 
already eaten their breakfast except the three of us. However, Kasumi, 
being the thoughtful person that she is, made some extra for us and 
kept it in the kitchen.
	"Good morning! There's still some more food left," Kasumi 
said.
	"Thanks, Kasumi!" I thanked her for Mike and Hanny. Those 
two were already sitting down and gulping everything down. I quickly 
joined them.
	"Oh, my," she said. "You three have the appetite just like 
Ranma and Mr. Saotome."
	"They're just healthy, growing lads, Kasumi," Mr. Tendo said 
while setting up a game of Go. He and Saotome-panda started playing 
again.
	"I got to go to Dr. Tofu's clinic now," Mike said. "Thanks for 
the food, Kasumi." He got up, put on his shoes and left.
	"So, Hanny," I began.
	"What?" he answered.
	"Why'd you get up so early?" I asked. "I mean, you usually 
like to sleep in till around noon or so when you don't have to go 
somewhere in the morning."
	"You're right," I nodded. "I usually don't. However, I want to 
go to Nekohanten with you today."
	"Is Ukyou not paying you enough or something?" I joked.
	"No, it's not to get a job," Hanny shot back to me, not 
amused. "I need to ask her about my wrist bands."
	"Oh, is that all," I blinked.
	Hanny and I finished our breakfast. We were ready to go out 
the door before nine. Hanny left his stuff here since he'll be back but I 
took my bag with me.
	"Don't forget to remind Ranko of our date tonight!" I told 
Kasumi.
	"Don't worry, I won't!" she waved.
			******
	Mike arrived at Dr. Tofu's clinic a little early. He helped Dr. 
Tofu do various chores and tasks. The morning was very busy but Mike 
handled it well. There was one small incident that happened a little 
before noon.
	Mike was outside the door, sweeping the floor. He looked 
around to make sure no one was watching him. He grabbed the broom 
and started using it like a jo. He did various kata with the jo that he 
learned in aikido, just to keep up with his skills.
	A big cloud of dust was chasing something. They were a little 
away from the clinic. Mike was too much in concentration to notice. 
They cloud of dust turned out to be a group of ladies chasing none 
other than Happosai.
	"Hahaha!" he laughed. "Silk panties!" He stopped in front of 
Mike to observe his kata. "Hum... Good, you're not too bad with that."
	"What?" Mike was startled. He looked down and saw the little 
man with a bag over his back. "Oh, I didn't know you were watching 
me. What's that cloud of dust?" He looked down the street at the 
approaching crowd.
	"Never mind that right now, m'boy!" he said. "Do me one 
small favor and I'll give you a gift."
	"What's the favor," Mike asked, a little suspicious.
	"It's not much," Happosai said. "Just hide me from that crowd 
of angry women. They're out to kill me!"
	"Oh, OK," Mike said, not really sure if he wanted to help him. 
"Hide behind this door." Mike pointed at the door in the clinic.
	"Thank you, m'boy!" Happosai sprinted inside the clinic. The 
crowd of angry women stopped in front of Mike. They were wielding 
mops, brooms, rolling pins and sticks.
	"Did you see a perverted old man carrying a bag run over 
here?" one of the women asked.
	"Yeah," Mike answered. "He went that way." Mike pointed  
around the corner."
	"Thanks!" she answered. They ran off to where Mike was 
pointing.
	"Thank you, m'boy," Happosai stepped out from behind the 
door.. "You saved an old man's life today."
	"Um, you're welcome, I think," I answered. "Why were they 
chasing you?"
	"I don't have time to explain, m'boy," he said, purposely 
ignoring his question. He grabbed a two meter long, golden metal staff 
from behind him out of nowhere. "I see you're pretty good with a jo. 
Here this is my gift!" He threw it to him.
	"Thanks," Mike thanked him. "I think it's a little too long for 
me. I'm used to something that is about 5 inches shorter." As soon as 
Mike said that, the metal staff shrunk 5 inches. "What the heck?!" Mike 
dropped it.
	"That's a magical staff," he said. "I... borrowed it from a 
monkey king a while ago in China. It'll shrink and grow to your liking. 
It can even shrink to the size of a toothpick. But I wouldn't do that if I 
were you, m'boy. It'll be hard to find. Go to go now!" He ran off down 
the street.
	"Thanks again," he said but Happosai didn't hear him. Mike 
picked up the staff again. It was very light for something that looks like 
it was made of steel. "Shrink to the size of a pen!" Mike commanded it.
	Sure enough, it shrank to the size of a pen. Mike put it in his 
pocket and went back to sweeping.
	"Monkey king in China?" he paused and mumbled to himself. 
"That sounds like the story from Journey to the West." He shrugged off 
the thought and finished sweeping.
	"Michael," Dr. Tofu peeked his head out the door. "Thanks for 
helping this morning. You can go on your lunch break now. Be back in 
an hour."
	"Thanks, Dr. Tofu," Mike let the broom lean against the door 
and walked down the street. This time, he headed for Nekohanten.
			******
	"It seems to me that Shampoo likes you," Hanny said as we 
walked down the street. The thought hit me. I forgot completely about 
Shampoo! What would she think about this date with Ranma-chan?
	"Uh, yeah, you could say she likes me," I answered.
	"So, do you like her also?"
	"Yeah, of course I do! She's a babe! Even with weird hair 
color."
	"Then why are you going to go on a date with Ranko? You're 
taking her to the restaurant she works at, for crying out loud!"
	"Hey, calm down," I started getting afraid of Hanny. "Are you 
like jealous or something?"
	"Jealous? Me?" Hanny said again. "Why would I be jealous?"
	"That's what I was wondering," I said.
	"I am very offended by what you said," Hanny clinched his 
fist. "I demand you apologize!" What happened next really caught me 
by surprise.
	Hanny's clinched fists now held two round, stick-like swords. 
The wrist bands expanded into bracers up to his forearm. It looked like 
two blue light sabres from Star Wars. I started walking away from him. 
He stared at the weapons in his hands now.
	"Hey, I'm sorry!" I backed away from him. Hanny released 
his fists and the swords disappeared just like light sabres do in Star 
Wars. His bracers also shrank back to wrist bands.
	"What the hell was that?" Hanny looked at his wrist bands.
	"C'mon," I said. "Let's get over to Nekohanten quickly and 
ask Cologne about this."
			******
	We arrived at Nekohanten. It was empty except for Shampoo, 
who was opening the restaurant up.
	"Nihao! Shampoo happy to see Jack!" she yelled as soon as I 
walked in. She glomped onto me immediately and, to my surprise, gave 
me a quick kiss on the lips. I started blushing.
	"If you say a word, Hanny..." I went on.
	"Hey, I'm not making fun," he smiled. "Come on. Detach 
yourself from Shampoo and let's find Cologne." Hanny got a whack on 
the head from a wooden cane.
	"You shall show respect and refer to me as Great-
grandmother, friend of young one," Cologne said. She appeared out of 
nowhere.
	"Good morning, Great-grandmother," I tried to bow.
	"Ah, I see your back has healed up," she greeted me. "Did 
those pills help?"
	"Uh, Y-y-yeah," I stuttered on. Shampoo was still glomped 
onto me. I wasn't used to so much affection and her chest rubbing up 
to my ribs was not claming me down too much. "It-it-it felt like a-a-a 
massage when I-I-I took them."
	"Shampoo, get off of Jack," Cologne ordered.
	"Yes, Great-grandmother," she reluctantly got off of me. She 
went back to opening up the restaurant.
	"I knew those instant massage pill would help," Cologne said.
	"Yeah, enough about his back," Hanny interrupted but only 
got another whack on his head. "Will you stop that?" Hanny clenched 
his fists again. Once again, two light sabres shot up in his fists and his 
wrist bands expanded up to his forearm.
	"Ah, I see you have discovered the secret of those wrist bands, 
friend of young one," Cologne said. "Come back into the kitchen."
	Hanny calmed down and unclenched his fists. The sword 
disappeared and the wrist bands shrank again. We followed her into the 
kitchen. Mousse was in there cutting a few vegetables. Well, he was 
actually cutting a piece of wood but he thought it was some vegetables.
	"What are these, these THINGS?!" Hanny asked. Cologne 
whacked him again.
	"Must I remind you each time, friend of young one?" Cologne 
said again.
	"My apologies, Great-grandmother," Hanny said, rubbing his 
head. "What are these wrist bands, Great-grandmother?"
	"I have already told you the origins, friend of young one," 
Cologne said. I found a stool and sat down to listen to her. "These wrist 
bands will summon swords whenever you need it."
	"Hold it a sec, Great-grandmother," Hanny said. "You're 
saying that when I'm in trouble or just want these to appear, they'll 
appear?"
	"Yes, friend of young one," Cologne answered. "Use them 
wisely."
	"Ah, I can live with that," Hanny said. He clenched his fists 
and once again, the wrist bands expanded and two swords that 
resembled light sabres appeared in his hands. He let go and they went 
away. "Cool! Thank you, Great-grandmother, for this gift." He bowed.
	"You are welcome, friend of young one," Cologne said. "They 
will be very useful in the future."
	"I think I'll go home now, Jack," Hanny said. "Want me to 
take your bag home for you?"
	"Oh, thanks," I said and handed him my bag. "See you around 
six?"
	"Sure," Hanny said. "I'll check to see if they cleared that big 
tree out of the road yet. Thanks again, Great-grandmother. Bye!" He 
left.
			******
	"Hey, Shampoo-chan?" I peeked my head out the door into 
the restaurant.
	"Yes, Jack?" she ran up to me and glomped onto me again. I 
was getting uncomfortable again.
	"C-c-could I-I, um, have a talk with you?" I asked.
	"Shampoo happy Jack back is better now," she ignored me 
and hugged me tighter.
	"Um, Shampoo-chan?" I tried again.
	"Yes?" she looked up at me.
	"Could you let go a little bit?" I asked. "I'm not so used to 
being hugged so, ah, tight." She let go. "Thank you."
	"Why Jack so nervous when near Shampoo now?" she asked.
	"Well, I'm just not used to so much affection," I answered. 
"And before I was just too tired to really get nervous."
	"Shampoo help with that!" she glomped onto me again. I sat 
down with her still glomping onto me.
	"Sit down, Shampoo-chan," I asked her. She let go and sat 
down at a table. "OK, Shampoo-chan, I need to tell you something. 
Tonight, I'll be on a date with the female Ranma?"
	"Why Jack go on date with girl-type Ranma?" she asked 
firmly. "Jack no like Shampoo?" She started crying.
	"No, no, no," I answered. "It's not that. Of course I like you."
	"I so happy!" she jumped out of her chair and glomped onto 
me again.
	"Ca-can you sit down again?" I asked again. She did as I 
asked. "I only want to play a little trick on him, OK? Will you help me 
with this?"
	"Shampoo do to make Jack happy!" she nodded.
	"OK, this is what I want you to do..." I went on.
			******
	Hanny got home around 11. He forgot to get some bus fare 
and had to walk while carrying a bag. Jack's nanny was the only one 
home
	"Hi, Hanny," she greeted him. "They cleared that tree off the 
road this morning."
	"Hi," Hanny greeted back. He set Jack's bag down next to the 
couch. "You know, Nekohanten is a lot closer to Tendo Training Hall 
than here. In fact, I think that Dr. Tofu's clinic and Ucchan's is closer 
also."
	"It is, Hanny," she said. "A letter came yesterday from a 
friend. Most of it is in English so I thought it'd be for you guys." She 
gave him the envelope.
	"Ah, it's from Dan," Hanny said. "He's a friend of ours. Oh, 
he's coming to Japan also. Flight 477, 4:30 in only two days. Huh, 
wonder why he's coming."
	"That's nice that I'll get to meet another one of your friends," 
Jack's nanny said.
	"Hey, I have an idea," Hanny said. "Do you think it'll be OK if 
we stay at Tendo Training Hall for the rest of our stay here? I mean, it's 
a lot closer to our workplaces."
	"I don't know," she said. "You guys eat a lot and they already 
have two house guests."
	"Oh, come on," he argued. "We'll have jobs to pay rent!"
	She hesitated a litlle, "Alright."
	"Yes!" he cheered.
	"But you need to ask Tendo-san now."
	"And I also have to tell Mike and Jack. Oh, yeah, Jack isn't 
training at Tendo Training Hall anymore. He's going to train with 
Cologne now. So, you'll only have two of us to pick up tonight. Jack 
also has a date tonight."
	"A date?" she repeated. "He's awfully young to start dating."
	"Yeah, he never had a girlfriend before in America," he said.
	"Maybe being here had changed him a little," she said.
	"Who knows," he said and went into the kitchen to get 
something to eat. "Man, I should have ate something at Nekohanten."
			******
	The entire morning was pretty busy at Nekohanten. Cologne 
made me cook a few things. If I was too slow, she'd whack me on the 
head. If I was too sloppy, she'd whack me also. I can tell you, my head 
hurt very much when I began. Eventually, I made quick and neat 
ramen.
	Cologne then had me pass the orders to Shampoo and Mousse 
over the counter. If I spilled even one drop, she whacked me. If I was 
too slow, she whacked me also. I had a very large headache while doing 
this. Soon, I got the hang of it and started getting better. I didn't spill 
any ramen and I was getting fast in serving it.
	When things started slowing down, Cologne told me to go 
back outside again. Once again, the giant fan was there. I decided to 
stay quiet and not complain.
	"I will show you a move today," she began, "Can you make a 
hole in that wall?" She pointed to a wall.
	"Um, I don't think I can if you mean by punching or kicking it, 
Great-grandmother," I replied.
	"Very well," she said. "Watch carefully." She did a palm hand 
strike. Instantly, there was a hole shaped like her hand in the wall.
	"Ho-how did you do that?" I asked. I ran up to the wall. I 
examined the hole in the wall. The outline was exactly the outline of 
Cologne's hand.
	"Do you like that?" she asked me. "Would you like to learn 
that move?"
	"Y-yes, Great-grandmother," I answered.
	"Good, I thought you would, young one," she nodded. "Since 
you know Chinese, I will tell you the Chinese name. The move is called 
Fung Twei."
	"Wind push?" I asked. She whacked me on the head.
	"The proper name is Air Drill, young one." she corrected me. 
"It is the technique to push air molecules and move them in a straight 
line. They tighten together and move collectively instead of just flowing 
around your hand. It is simular to pushing a line of bowling balls down 
the gutter of a bowling alley; you only push one but they push each 
other."
	"Yes, Great-grandmother," I said.
	"Today, I want you to push against the fan," she motioned me 
to stand in front of the fan.
	"Of course, Great-grandmother," I said. I stood with my back 
against the wall so I wouldn't slam into it with full force again. She 
started the fan on the low setting again. I waited a little bit for it to reach 
its peek. I started punching against it with all my might. At first I 
couldn't do it.
	"Don't think of using strength," she told me. "Think of using 
your chi to align the molecules together."
	I listened to her words. I started ignoring whatever cramps 
there were in my arms or legs. I tried to concentrate on one thing: the air 
coming against me. I started punching against the wind. My arm could 
only extend half way but that was a big step considering I couldn't even 
extend at all before.
	"That is enough for today," Cologne said. She turned the fan 
off. "You need to do something else now."
			******
	Cologne showed me a small room with a shrine. It had some 
names written in Chinese on three tabs of wood on them. I was a little 
tired from my short training session.
	"These are the names of your dead three grandparents," she 
said.
	"How do you know them, Great-grandmother?" I wondered.
	"I have many ways of finding out, young one," she answered. 
"Do you not trust me?"
	"Oh, no, it's not that, Great-grandmother," I said. "I don't 
even know the names of my grandparents."
	"Sit down," she ordered. I sat down. "Close your eyes. Ranma 
has been training all his life, you will never catch up to him in training. 
This ceremony will make things a little more fairer. I believe you are 
better than him if you have the correct information. Your body will 
adapt quickly."
	"How, Great-grandmother?" I asked. She whacked me on my 
head again.
	"Let me finish, young one," she said. "This ceremony will give 
you all the information that all the spirits of your ancestors have ever 
experienced in their lifetimes."
	She did a few things and chanted a few words. I had my eyes 
closed so I had no idea what she did exactly. I did, however, feel the 
presence of something. I felt energy flow through my body. The feeling 
was indescribable. In my mind, I saw images of battles, brawls, training 
sessions, tournaments and one-on-one fights; images of punches, kicks, 
people getting hit and people hitting others. I saw images of people 
using Air Drill; all sorts of techniques and special styles of fighting went 
through my mind. There were also many images of weapons; 
nunchaku, tonfa, swords, sai, bo, jo, bokken, spear, bows and arrows 
and even chopsticks! Hundreds of thousands of memories went into 
me. Unfortunately, they were only of fights and nothing more.
	"You may open your eyes now,  young one," she said.
	I opened my eyes. Everything looked the same but I had a 
different perspective. I jumped up on my feet and Cologne tried to 
whack me again. This time, I dodged it very easily. It was like I've 
dodged the stick thousands of times before.
	"It has worked," she smiled. "But I did not tell you to stand up 
yet."
	"My apologies, Great-grandmother," I said, sat down 
immediately and shutting my eyes again. "I got too excited."
	"I expected that," she said. For some reason my right hand 
went up to my head. I felt something hit it. "I did not tell you to close 
your eyes again, young one."
	"I'm sorry again, Great-grandmother," I opened my eyes to 
see that I had blocked her whack at my head while my eyes were 
closed. She had a piece of metal about a meter long, a centimeter thick 
and about four centimeters wide.
	"I have one more ceremony for you to do," she said. She 
pulled out a small knife.
	"Are you going to make me commit seppuku or something?" I 
started getting nervous.
	"No, I'm not," she replied. She handed me the knife and the 
block of metal. It was very heavy. "This metal was forged in China. I 
want you to cut both the palm of your hands and smear the blood on 
each side of the metal." 
	I reluctantly did as she told me. To my surprise, cutting my 
hands didn't hurt at all. The knife also had no blood on it after I cut my 
hands. I smeared my blood on the piece of metal. When I took my 
hands off the metal, my cut was fully heal. There was no scar.
	"Now, get up and set the metal on the shrine," she ordered.
	"Yes, Great-grandmother," I said. I did as she said, then 
handed her the knife. "May I ask what that last ceremony was for?"
	"You will know tomorrow, young one," she said.
			******
	Mike walked into the Nekohanten. He saw the place semi-busy 
with Shampoo waiting on tables.
	"Nihao!" she greeted him.
	"Hi, Shampoo," he greeted her back. "Is Jack around?"
	"Oh, you Michael, yes?" she asked. "Jack is back with Great-
grandmother. They almost finished."
	"Yes, I'm Michael," he answered. He looked around. 
"Where's Shammy?"
	"Shammy sleeping now," Shampoo answered. "You waiting 
here until Jack come back, yes?"
	"OK, I'll do that," Mike sat down at a table. "Could you get 
me a bowl of ramen also?" He took out his newly acquired jo, that was 
the size of a pencil and twiddled it in his fingers.
			******
	Dan Myrick yawned and stretched out in his seat. Just about 
another four hours and he'd be in Tokyo airport. He got up to go to the 
bathroom.
	He sat down on the toilet seat. Suddenly, a voice came on in 
the intercom.
	"Please remain in your seats," it said. "We are expecting some 
turbulence. Thank you."
	"Oh, no," Dan said. He tried to get up but the plane shifted 
wildly. He sat down on the toilet again. Suddenly, his seat came out 
from under him. He felt a big draft, then looked up to see the plane 
above him.
	"Ahhhhhh!!!!!" he yelled as he fell down into the middle of 
the Pacific. Not only was he yelling because he was falling, but also 
because there was no toilet paper with him.
	He landed on with a loud splash in the ocean. He survived the 
impact with the water and saw an island a little ways away. He swam 
for his life towards it.
	He reached the shore of the island, panting. He looked up to 
see a band of dark men around him pointing their spears at him.
	"Help me," he passed out.
			******
	I walked out of the kitchen to get a glass of water. The two 
ceremonies I just did wore me out. Plus, I didn't get any water after 
doing that short training session.
	"Here, Shampoo pour for you," Shampoo insisted.
	"Um, thank you, Shampoo-chan," I thanked her. "You really 
don't need to."
	"There you are," Mike said. I turned to him. He was playing 
around with a pencil and was eating a bowel of ramen. "I've been 
waiting quite a while for you.
	"Well, I was busy," I said.
	"Hey, is there some place we could talk?" he asked
	"Yeah, come into the kitchen," I replied. We walked into the 
kitchen. I took a gulp of my water. "What is it?"
	"It's this," he pointed to his unsharpened pencil.
	"So, it's a pencil without an eraser," I said. "What? You need 
money to buy a new pencil or something?"
	"No, watch," he said. "Grow one feet long." Before my eyes, 
the pencil grew one foot. My eyes shot wide. "See?"
	"Yes, I see," I said. "I think I've seen something like that 
before. Hey, I remember when my dad told me of stories from Journey 
to the West with the Monkey King, Sandy, that pig and that monk. He 
told me that the Monkey King had a big stick that could shrink and 
grow at one's will."
	"You are correct, young one," Cologne said from behind me. 
"That is the same staff that Monkey stole from the Dragon King at the 
bottom of the sea."
	"I always thought that that was just a myth," Mike said. "I 
mean, I remember reading it at school a year ago."
	"It is no myth, friend of young one," she said. "May I ask how 
you acquired it?"
	"This little old man with a bag gave it to me," Mike answered. 
"He was running away from a band of women. I helped hide him and 
he gave me this as a gift. Come to think of it, I think he's the same old 
man that was at Furikan that Miss Hinako wasted when we were there."
	"Happy!" Cologne said.
	"Why are you happy, Great-grandmother?" I asked.
	"I am not happy," she said. "That old man's name is Happy. 
Everyone else calls him Happosai. You are very fortunate that he gave it 
to you."
	"Well, he saw me do some kata with a broom stick," he started 
getting a little embarrassed.
	"Well, now you don't have to complain about not getting 
anything," I told him. "You have a magical weapon, Hanny has a 
magical weapon and I just got this ring for a lucky charm." I pointed to 
the ring.
	"Hanny has a magical weapon?" Mike asked.
	"I'll explain later," I said.
	"Take care of it, friend of young one," Cologne told him. "It 
will be very useful later on."
	"I got to get back to Dr. Tofu's clinic now," Mike said. "See 
you around like six when you come to pick up your date, Jack."
	"Uh, yeah," I said, a little fearful of what Cologne might think.
	Mike went out the door, heading outside to go to Dr. Tofu's 
clinic. I turned to Cologne to see what she was going to say to me. She 
wasn't there. She just pretended she didn't hear anything about a date.
	"Hey, Great-grandmother," I said, walking towards the stove. 
That's where she was; making an order of ramen.
	"Yes, young one?" she asked.
	"Is it OK if I stay over here tonight?" I asked. This is was part 
of my plan. "I don't think they cleared the road that goes to my 
nanny's house yet."
	"You are welcome here anytime, young one," she said, not 
asking anymore questions.
	"Thank you, Great-grandmother," I bowed.
	The rest of the day was not too busy. She still made me cook 
everything quickly and handed me the orders very quickly. She did not 
threaten me with her stick anymore, however. It came to be 4:30 before 
I knew it. She let me go at that time.
			******
	I walked to the nearest hotel. I signed in but had a bit of a hard 
time with he receptionist.
	"Please sign your name in the guest book," he asked. I signed 
my name in Chinese. "Uh, sir, how do you pronounce your name?"
	"What?!" I shouted at him. "Are you that uneducated as to not 
know how to read my name? What an illiterate! I'm going to make sure 
you lose your job after I find another hotel."
	"My apologies, sir," he said. "You just have... an unique name. 
I will give you a discount for my error. Enjoy your Honeymoon Suite."
	"Thank you," I said. I turned around and headed out the door. 
I started laughing as I started walking over to my nanny's house. So far, 
so good for my plan.
			******
	I reached my nanny's house. I walked in and took off my 
shoes.
	"I hear you have a date," Ken greeted me.
	"Oh, hi, Ken," I said. "Yeah, I do. Hey, does Furikan have a 
good computer lab?" I tried to change the subject.
	"Yeah, it's a pretty good one too. Why?" he asked.
	"I want to check my e-mail," I said. "Can you take me there 
tomorrow?"
	"Sure," he nodded. "Oh, here's a letter from a friend of 
yours."
	I took the letter and read it. It was from Dan, saying that he's 
coming to Japan also. I gave back the letter to him and wondered why 
Dan's coming. I sat down on the couch to relax a bit from my long day 
after putting the bag that Hanny just left by the couch in my room.
			******
	Mike and Hanny reached Tendo Training Hall at the same 
time. They each had a long day at the work place. Hanny tripped and 
almost burned his face on the grill while Mike got in the way of Dr. 
Tofu when Kasumi came for a visit.
	"Man, you wouldn't believe the day I've had," they both said 
together. "Look what I got." They did it again and pulled out their 
weapons.
	"Cool," Hanny said, putting his swords away.
	"Yeah," Mike agreed, shrinking the staff. "Jack said something 
about you having some cool weapons. After you." Mike and Hanny 
went inside Tendo Training Hall.
	"How was your day at work?" Hanny asked.
	"Good," Mike said. "Dr. Tofu let me do some simple pressure 
points because I've been reading that book. I even paralyzed someone 
for him."
	"That's cool," Hanny said. "Ukyou let me cook more 
okonomiyaki. I even made it more circular than oval!"
	They changed quickly and started warming up. Mike had the 
staff under his belt. Tendo was a little startled and surprised to see Mike 
with a pencil under his belt.
	"Why do you have a pencil under your belt?" he asked.
	"Oh, this?" he picked it out and extended it to his liking. "It's a 
gift."
	"Want to spar?" Hanny clenched his fists and the light sabre-
like swords appeared in his hands.
	"Wh-what are you doing?" Tendo asked. "What are those 
things?
	"What's it look like we're doing, Sensei?" Hanny asked.
	"You haven't even bowed in yet," he started weeping. Mike 
and Hanny started fighting. Their fighting skills were much better with 
the weapons. It looked like they had used them for years.
	"No, you're going to make more holes in my dojo," he started 
going nuts now.
	"Hey, you know, I have an idea," Hanny said, while swinging 
at Mike.
	"What's that?" he asked, blocking it with his jo.
	"Don't you find that it's easier to walk over to work from here 
than taking the bus from home?" he asked, jumping out of Mike's 
sweep.
	"You know, you're right," he said, lunging in.
	"You want to live here from now on?" Hanny suggested.
	"Sure, why not," he said. "Just got to tell Jack now."
	"What?!" Tendo shouted. "No, no, you can't. I can't afford to 
feed three more people. Please don't move in." They stopped fighting.
	"No need to worry about funds," Hanny assured. "We have 
jobs, remember? We'll pay for the food and even help cook, and do 
dishes."
	"And you'll pay rent also, right?" Tendo stopped crying.
	"I guess we could," Mike said.
	"Wonderful!" Tendo started weeping again. "You can move in 
tomorrow! Now, line up and bow in!"
	"Yes, Sensei!" they boy said together and put away their 
weapons.
			******
	I took a shower and a change of clothes. My nanny went to 
pick up Hanny and Mike from practice so I took a ride to Tendo 
Training Hall with her. I had a small bouquet of flowers with me. We 
arrived just as Mike and Hanny were finishing up.
	"Hey, Mike," I said. "Did Hanny tell you about his wrist 
bands?"
	"Yeah," Mike answered. "I also told him about my jo. Hanny 
thinks we should move here. It's a lot closer to work but we'd have to 
help cook, do dishes and pay rent. What do you think?"
	"Sounds fine to me if Tendo-san and my nanny says it's OK," 
I agreed.
	"Then it's settled!" Tendo-san cheered. "You can move in 
tomorrow!"
	"You know," Hanny began, "I think we should be a team and 
have a name for ourselves. Something like the Three Musketeers!"
	"I don't think so, Hanny," I frowned. "That's really dorky."
	"How about the Purple Axemen?" Mike suggested. "What 
about Teenage Mu-"
	"Shut up, Mike," Hanny and I said together.
	"What about the Awesome Threesome?
	"Nah, that's stupid," I said. There was dead silence from the 
three of us for a while. "I know! How about the Four Horsemen!"
	"Wasn't that from the bible or something?" Mike asked.
	"I don't know," I answered. "I've heard it somewhere."
	"Sounds good," Hanny said. "But we only have three of us. 
Who are we going to get for our fourth person?"
	"We'll talk about it later," I said. "You guys go. I'm here to 
pick up Ranko."
	"I told you already!" shouted Ranma-chan's voice from 
somewhere in the house. "I'm not wearing a dress on no date!"
	"Just put this on," Nabiki argued. I walked over to where all 
the commotion was.
	"Ah, Ranko!" I said. She was struggling in her dress. I tried 
not to laugh. It was dark blue, a little like Akane's hair, and a tight skirt 
that reached just below her knees. "You're looking lovely tonight. I 
assume you are ready."
	"She's almost done, Jack," Nabiki blinked. "Hey, I'll give you 
some flowers for 1000 yen."
	"Ah, no thanks, Nabiki," I said. "I brought my own. Here you 
go, my pigtailed redhead." I handed her a bouquet of flowers from 
behind my back.
	"Ahh, thanks, I think," Ranma-chan said. "I think I'm ready 
now."
	"Alright, let's go then," I hooked her hand with my arm and 
left.
	"I'll get you back later, Nabiki!" Ranma-chan shouted behind 
her.
	"What's this all about?" I asked.
	"Oh, it's nothing," she answered.
			******
	"Did Ranma really go on that date with Jack?" Kasumi asked.
	"Yes, she did," Nabiki answered. She brought out a small 
piece of paper with some names and numbers written on them. "Looks 
like I made quite a good profit in the betting pool. Now I just owe 
Ranma 20%"
	"How nice of Ranma to actually go on a date with someone," 
Kasumi smiled.
	"Don't patronize him," Akane shouted. "Bad enough he has 
all these girls going after him but now another guy going after him! 
Ranma, you jerk!" She stomped outside.
			******
	We walked into the Nekohanten, arm in arm. Ranma-chan did 
not say much during the walk to the restaurant, even though I tried 
many ice breakers. Shampoo seated us without making a big deal of 
everything. It was a good thing I told her earlier today. We sat down in 
a small, private table where we wouldn't be bothered too much.
	"Don't forget, Shampoo-chan," I whispered into Shampoo's 
ears as I walked by her.
	"Shampoo no forget!" she blinked.
	"How dare you take another!" Mousse shouted and jumped at 
our table. He tried to slam at me with a metal pot that he got out of his 
sleeve but, since his glasses were off, he aimed at Ranma-chan again. 
Ranma instinctively got up and kicked it out of his hands. The pot hit 
him square on the head.
	"Mousse so stupid," Shampoo came over and brought two 
glasses of water and a pitcher for us. She picked up the unconscious 
Mousse and dragged him into the kitchen. "Shampoo get rid of 
Mousse."
	I popped two pills in my mouth, telling Ranma-chan that they 
were anti-acids that I have to take before eating. They actually were pills 
that counter act the effects of alcohol.
	We ordered whole fried chicken and hot and sour soup. I had 
told Shampoo earlier to make the order a little extra salty so that 
Ranma-chan would drink the water. She didn't say much other than 
thanking me for the free food. After about 10 minutes, Ranma-chan 
was drunk.
	"...and you see, mah dath tuk mie ta Cina an we..." she passed 
out.
	"I see," I smiled. I got up to go to the bathroom. With both our 
appetites, we ate everything. We also drank a lot of water due to the 
saltiness of it.  Shampoo did drug the water, as I asked her earlier today. 
I had to go to the bathroom really badly now.
	I got back and picked up Ranma-chan. She was very light, but 
then again, I didn't have much experience picking up girls.
	"Be back in about half an hour, Shampoo-chan," I blinked at 
her. "Thanks again."
	"Shampoo happy to help Jack!" she shouted. I swear I thought 
she was going to glomp onto me again while I had Ranma-chan in my 
arms.
			******
	I walked outside and headed for the hotel. A door man opened 
the door for me. The receptionist greeted me with a smile.
	"Ah, sir, you're back," he said. "I'll get a bell boy to help you 
and... you're other... to your room."
	"That's OK," I said. "Just give me the key and don't bother 
us."
	"Yes, sir," he agreed. "It's on the second floor." He handed 
me the key. I went into the elevator, pushed the button and took a peek 
at the key.
	"Hum... Room 69" I smiled. *BING* The elevator reached the 
second floor and the door opened. "Let's see, 66, 67, 68, ah here it is, 
Room 69."
	I unlocked the door and walked in. It was a small room with a 
fireplace and a bed. The view was wonderful. The lights of Tokyo 
astonished me. Then, I remembered I had Ranma-chan in my arms.
	"Here you go," I said, dropping her on the bed. I took off her 
dress and set it on a chair. She didn't have a bra on, but I wasn't too 
surprised at them. She had boxer shorts on with the letter R imprinted 
all over.
	I took a look at her chest. She had a nice figure but that's just a 
curse. I took off her boxer shorts and set it on the chair also. I then 
tucked in the naked Ranma-chan in the bed. I also undid her hair. I then 
put the note that Shampoo helped me write next to the pillow.
It read:
		Dear Ranko
	So sorry that I couldn't stay. You screamed very loudly.

					Love,
					Jack
	I wrote my name in English. The rest was in what simple 
hiragana I knew. I then left the room and put a "Do not disturb" sign on 
the door knob and went down to the main floor.
	"Leaving already, sir?" the receptionist asked.
	"I forgot something at a restaurant," I lied. I went out through 
the double doors towards Nekohanten.
			******
	"I have to WHAT?!" I shouted. Cologne swung at my head 
again for yelling but I dodged it again, just like earlier today.
	"You heard me, young one," Cologne said. "You will sleep in 
Shampoo's room."
	"I shall not let you do such an act, Jack!" Mousse shouted and 
jumped at me. I immediately dodged, just like in an image downloaded 
from my ancestors, but found out I didn't need to because Cologne had 
poked a sleeping point on Mousse's neck.
	"Good night, Mousse," she said and poured some cold water 
on him. Instant sleeping duck. "Now, you will sleep in Shampoo's 
room or not sleep at all."
	"Yes, Great-grandmother," I sighed. I was too tired from 
helping her cook and closing the restaurant to argue anymore.
	"Good night, young one," she said. "Sweet dreams." She 
opened the door and left. Shampoo jumped out just before the door 
closed.
	"Aiyah! Shampoo sleep with Jack tonight," she smiled. She 
then started to unbutton her shirt.
	"Wh-what are y-you doing?" I asked, turning around.
	"Why you so shy?" she asked.
	"I'm just not used to this," I answered. "Why are you doing 
this anyway?"
	"Great-grandmother say best way to keep man happy," she 
replied. "Is what every man want, yes?"
	"Yes, I mean no," I stuttered on. "I mean it is what most men 
want but I don't want i-it right now."
	"Jack no... no..." she started.
	"Of course I'm not," I said, turning around.
	"Good," she smiled and continued to unbutton her shirt. I 
immediately turned around again.
	"Cou-could you keep your clothes on?" I asked.
	"OK, Shampoo do for Jack," she said. I slowly turned around 
to find that she had buttoned her shirt again.
	"Alright," I started, "y-you can have the futon, and I'll just, 
uh, just sleep on the, um, floor."
	"Shampoo want Jack and Shampoo sleep in same futon," she 
said.
	"I, uh, I-I don't know," I said. "I'd feel much more 
comfortable if you, um, could change into a cat and sleep in the futon. 
Then we'd bother get what we want."
	"OK, Shampoo change," she slightly smiled. She went 
outside. I heard a splash and then a pinkish cat walked in. I shut the 
door.
	"Thanks, Shampoo-chan," I said. I began taking off my shirt 
and pants. I'm used to sleeping in a white tank top and boxer shorts. 
"Sorry, Shampoo, I don't sleep in the nude. Good night." I turned out 
the lights and slipped in the futon. Shampoo-neko found a nice spot 
next to my ribs.
			******
	Mara was watching Jack since the beginning of his date. She 
had big plans for him except she couldn't get to him. Something was 
blocking her.
	"Damn it, old ghoul!" she cursed her. "Why did you have to 
give him that jade ring! Oh well, I'll just do something to your great-
granddaughter in return. Hahahahaha"
	She started preparing in the basement. This time, she went 
after Shampoo. Someone that was close to Jack.
			******
	Shampoo was in a dark room lit by candle light and nothing 
more. Jack was the only other person in the room.
	"Aiyah! Jack!" she glomped on to him. "Wo ai ni."
	"Wo ye ai ni," Jack said "I love also love you" in Chinese.
	"I so happy!" she exclaimed.
	"And why should you be so happy?" Ranma said. Shampoo 
looked up to see that she was now glomped onto Ranma.
	"So, you unfaithful slut," Jack shouted a few feet away. "I 
knew you couldn't resist Ranma."
	"What? You cheated on me?" Ranma said. He detached 
himself from Shampoo.
	"No, Shampoo no- meow," she started but cold water 
splashed out of the darkness above her. She turned into a cat. Ranma 
caught her and put her in a bag.
	"Let's head for the dam," Ranma suggested.
	"Yeah," Jack agreed. "She'll learn not to cheat on us from 
now on."
	The bag was thrown in the air. It fell into the cold, winter 
water. Shampoo-neko felt the bag soak up freezing water. She could 
sense her life ending soon. Jack and Ranma were laughing merrily 
above her.
			******
	"Meow!" Shampoo-neko awoke. It was late at night. The bad 
dream was too much for her. She hopped outside and went to get some 
warm water. She came back in human form. She slipped in with Jack, 
ever so carefully, while still naked.
	"Shampoo faithful to Jack," she whispered and fell asleep.
			******
	I woke up listening to the birds chirping. It felt like I slept with 
a pole tied to my back and like I had my arms wrapped around a warm, 
firm pillow with two rather large and warm water balloons. Wait, water 
balloons don't have nipples.
	I opened my eyes. My arms were wrapped around Shampoo's 
naked body. I was about to scream but what she said stopped me.
	"Jack no leave Shampoo," she mumbled. I then decided not to  
scream but to enjoy this for a bit. I even thought about experimenting 
but two reasons stopped me. One, I didn't have her permission and 
two, I REALLY had to go to the bathroom. When her hand reached 
down to my boxer shorts, I decided to pick that moment to get up and 
go the bathroom.
	I got up, half awake and not really knowing where I was going. 
Now I know how Mousse felt. I kept bumping into walls while getting 
to the bathroom and getting back. I quickly slipped back in with 
Shampoo. My back still felt like it was tied to a pole but fell asleep again 
quickly.
			******
	Ranma-chan awoke around 9:30 and screamed. She was 
naked, in a strange room and in her girl form. She looked over to the 
note on the pillow next to her.
	"What the hell..." she said. "I don't remember a thing. That 
damn Jack, he got me drunk and..." She screamed out and crumbled the 
note in her hand. She quickly got up, got dressed, tied her hair and ran 
out the door.
	"Wait till I get my hands on him!" she shouted, running down 
the street towards Tendo Training Hall. He had a hard time running in 
high heels and wearing a dress.
	"Why hello, Ranma," Kasumi greeted her. "How did your 
date go?"
	"Where is he?" he shouted.
	"Where is who?" Nabiki said. "Oh, here's your 20 percent." 
She handed him some money but it was really 15 percent.
	"Jack! That's who. Where is that bastard!" he said, taking the 
money. 
	"You two didn't come back last night," Nabiki answered. 
"You're dad got a little worried that... something happened to you. 
>From the looks of it, I think something did."
	"Yeah, well something's going to happen to Jack now," she 
stomped into his room, changed into his boy form and dressed in guy's 
clothes.
	"Hey, where were you last night," Akane said as Ranma ran 
out the door. Ranma didn't answer and ran off. "If you're looking for 
Jack, he's probably working at Nekohanten right now, BAKA!"
			******
	"Where is he!" I was awakened by the same voice two days in 
a row. I opened my eyes to see Ranma stomp down the door. Shampoo 
was behind me so Ranma didn't see her. He was carrying a bucket of 
water. Cologne followed behind him. "Alright Jack, time to die!"
	"Hey, what did I do?" I smiled. I tried to sit up but Shampoo 
glomped on to me harder.
	"This is what you did," he said. He dumped the bucket of 
water on himself and instant Ranma-chan appeared. "See now, you 
jerk. I'm really a guy! Now die!"
	"Airen," Shampoo mumbled, sat up and rubbed the sleep out 
of her eyes.
	"What?!" Ranma-chan shouted. "First you get me drunk and 
then you seduced Shampoo? You womanizer! Now you die!" She 
jumped at me.
	"Ranma no hurt Jack," Shampoo pulled a bonbori out of 
nowhere and pointed it at Ranma's face.
	"What's goin' on here? Why are you defending him?" she 
asked.
	"Shampoo have more honor if marry Jack," she started, 
"Shampoo no have honor if marry Ranma now but Shampoo still get 
honor if kill Ranma!" She jumped up and pulled out another bonbori to 
proceeded to attack Ranma-chan in the nude.
	"Ahh! What are you doing?" he dodged. "You have to marry 
me by Amazon law."
	"Shampoo have choice," she said. "Either marry Ranma or 
kill. Shampoo chose to marry first but now have new choice for groom. 
Die!" She swatted her but Ranma-chan ducked.
	"Stop it, Shampoo-chan!" I shouted. They both stopped and 
looked at me. "Look, Ranma, first off, Shampoo snuck into my futon."
	"Oh, OK, then," she said in a very understanding way, as if 
she knew exactly how I felt.
	"Look, everyone just sit down and I'll explain," I said. 
Cologne still just held on to her stick there and watched everything 
quietly.  I got on my pants. Shampoo got some clothes on and sat down 
glomping onto me. Ranma-chan sat in front of me and looked a little 
surprised that Shampoo was glomping on to someone else now.
	"OK, just stay calm and let me finish everything," I said.
	"I'll try, but not very hard," she said.
	"Shampoo-chan here, told me about your curse," I said.
	"What's with this Shampoo-chan thing?" he asked.
	"Shampoo want airen to call Shampoo Shampoo-chan," she 
answered for me.
	"Anyway, I didn't do anything to you." I explained.  "I'm 
surprised that you, being such a good fighter, didn't notice a little 
difference down there. I mean, wouldn't you expect it to be a little 
looser?"
	"Looser?" she shouted. "You pervert, of course you would 
know!"
	"Well, I'm pretty sure I'm right," I said. "Right, Shampoo-
chan?" I then said, in Chinese, "Play along with me."
	"Yes," she nodded and smiled. "Is feeling so loose now."
	"What?!" Ranma-chan shouted again. "Y-you mean,  you and 
h-her..."
	"Yup!" I lied and smiled. "Back to m-"
	"What about me, Shampoo?" Ranma-chan interrupted. I could 
tell she was getting jealous. "Aren't I your airen?"
	"Will you let me finish?!" I shouted at him. At this point, 
Cologne snuck behind her and tapped her on the neck. She then 
stiffened up and fell back.
	"You will listen to him, son-in-law," Cologne said and hopped 
back.
	"Thank you, Great-grandmother," I said.
	"Shampoo already told Ranma," she said, still glomped onto 
me. "Shampoo had choice of kill or marry. Shampoo chose marry over 
killing because Ranma is strong groom. Now Great-grandmother help 
find new, stronger groom."
	"You see, Ranma," I started again, "I find you an arrogant, 
conceited, egotistical little punk that is a good fighter. You aren't a 
martial artist, you're just a super street brawler. I've only observed how 
you act around Akane for a little while but I can already tell that you 
have too big of an ego to admit your feelings for her."
	"Y-you have n-no sense... of h-honor," she managed to say.
	"And you have no common sense!" I shot back at her. "In my 
dojo, if we say `yeah' we have to do push ups. It's so that we think 
before we talk so that we avoid fights and don't have to use our skills 
except in the most extreme of circumstances. The way I see it, you 
deserve that curse."
	"I-I can k-kick your a-ass," he said again.
	"I would not be so overconfident, son-in-law," Cologne said. 
"I have been training him. He has more potential than you do. I must 
check on Mousse now." She unparalyzed Ranma-chan and left.
	"I'm going to kick your ass now!" she jumped up and went 
into a fighting stance.
	"That's exactly what I mean," I said. "You use fists instead of 
words to work out things. A true martial artist will only fight as a last 
resort."
	"I don't care about what you say," she jumped up and began 
to attack. Shampoo shifted her weight so that I fell down on my back 
and into a position where she was on top of me. It felt like I fell on a 
pipe. "Shampoo, what are you doing?!"
	"Ranma leave now," she said. "We busy again." Her lips 
started coming closer to mine.
	"Yuck!" she said. "I don't want to watch you guys do your 
perverted stuff. I'm outta here." She landed gracefully and started out 
the door.
	"In spirit of being a martial artist, I hope we can be friends 
after this," I managed to shout at him with Shampoo on top of me.
	"Nothin' doing," I heard her yell back at me.
	"Ah, you can get off of me now, Shampoo-chan," I said. She 
wouldn't budge.
	"Shampoo like it here," she started to unbutton her shirt with 
one hand and unzip my pants with her other. I chose that time to get up 
and hop away from her. "Why Jack always stopping Shampoo when 
she want make him happy?" She started crying. I haven't seen many 
girls cry but, man, the way she cries is just so cute, it hits you right in 
the there.
	"Oh, I'm sorry, Shampoo-chan" I said and embraced her with 
big hug. She immediately stopped crying and embraced me back. "It's 
not that I don't like you or anything. I'm happy just, um, hugging you. 
I, uh, think you are very pretty but I just don't think it's a good idea 
right now, is th-" I stopped short. Something didn't feel right on my 
back. I felt one hand and something like a stick pressing against my 
back.
	"Um, could you tell me what is on my back, Shampoo-chan?" 
I asked her.
	"You have sword on back," she said. "Shampoo wonder why 
Jack wake up with sword."
	"Sword?!" I jumped up on my feet. I was so into lecturing 
Ranma that I hadn't even notice that a sword was strapped to my back. 
No wonder my back felt like it was tied to a pole all night. "C'mon, let's 
find Great-grandmother downstairs."
	I took off the sword that was strapped on my back and put on 
my shirt. The sword, which was really a katana, was in a black sheath 
with a long golden dragon on one side whose tail reached to the tip of 
the sword and with its head to the left of a jade ball towards the opening 
of the sword. I found it a little strange that the jade ball had my family 
name inscribed  in Chinese on it. I flipped over to the over side and 
found a picture of a flying crane with long tail feathers reaching to the 
tip of the sword and its beak to the left of another jade ball but with my 
given name inscribed in Chinese on it.
	We walked downstairs, hand in hand, to find Mousse doing a 
lot of chores.
	"Hey, Mousse," I said. "Good morning."
	"What's so great about this morning?" he asked. "I had to do 
all my work plus Shampoo's because YOU were asleep with her and 
Cologne didn't want you two to wake up too early." He got whacked 
on the head by Cologne.
	"You shall refer to me as Great-grandmother, Mousse," she 
said and went back to her cooking.
	"Great-grandmother," I said. "What is this?" I held out the 
sheathe with the katana in it. It had a leather strap attached to it.
	"Ah, I'm glad you finally noticed," she smiled. "Remember 
that block of metal yesterday?"
	"Yes," I nodded. "Is this what it turned into after the 
ceremony?"
	"You're smart, young one," she said, even though, it was kind 
of obvious. "This magical sword is your sword. Rather, it's your 
ancestor's sword. The spirits of your ancestors forged it and gave it to 
you. Only you and your direct descendants may use it."
	"If my ancestors forged this, why is it a Japanese katana," I 
asked.
	"For one thing, your ancestors knew that you always wanted 
to learn how to use a katana," she said. "Another thing, unsheathe it 
and look carefully."
	I did what she told me to do. The blade was beautiful. I looked 
carefully and saw a small inscription just below the handle. "Made in 
Japan" it said.
	"OK, so it's a katana because it's made in Japan," I sheathed 
the sword again. "So if I did the ceremony in China, it'd be a Chinese 
style sword?"
	"That is correct, young one," she said. "I will start training you 
in weapons combat starting today."
	"Uh, Great-grandmother," I began, "I find a problem with this. 
Hanny and Mike and easily hide their weapons. Won't I get arrested on 
the street for this?"
	"Very well," she said. "I will tell you a little bit about it. That 
sword, strap, sheathe and blade, can only be used by you and your 
descendants. It cannot ever fall out of the sheath nor can anyone else 
unsheathe it. You can make it disappear and summon it whenever you 
want to. This way, it will not be of any burden on you. Also, do no 
think of the sheath as a carrying case. Once unsheathed, the tip of the 
sheath is very sharp and can be used very well as a projectile weapon. 
Try what I have told you."
	I did what she said; I held the sheathe by it's tip and the sword 
didn't fall out. I shook it and it still did fall out. I unsheathed the sword 
and had Shampoo throw a cutting board in the air while I threw the 
sheath at it, true enough, the sheath went right through it. I then handed 
the sword to Shampoo. Before she could touch the handle, the sword 
disappeared and reappeared in my hands. I then sheathed it and threw it 
to her but it did the same thing. I set it on the ground to have her pick it 
up but the sword disappeared and reappeared in my hands as soon as it 
hit the ground.
	"Uh, Great-grandmother, how do I make it disappear when 
I'm not using it?" I asked her.
	"Just think about it being put away and it will be put away," 
she answered. "It is now a part of you just like an arm or a leg. Think of 
it coming to you when you need it."
	I did as she said. The sword disappeared easily and reappeared 
just as easily in my hands. I fiddled around with the strap and found 
that it was also magical. I could move it around and rotated it without 
any extra buckles or anything. It could be strapped on my back or I 
could carry it like a belt. I could even make it disappear by itself, leaving 
only the sword and sheath.
	In 24 hours, the three of use found three magical weapons to 
use. I had a feeling that there were a lot of big things with more 
surprises in for me during my trip to Japan. I could only imagine what 
was in store for my friends and me next.

			End Part VI
			Finished 5/21/96
Author's Notes:

Geez, this is really long. So, what do you think of this part? Kinda 
dorky? Dan Myrick is another friend of mine. He talked me into putting 
him in the story. I originally didn't really plan for him to be in there but 
then as I made further detailed outlines, I found that he fit in really well.

I got the gems, wrist band and light sabre idea from Star Wars and 
Tenchi Muyo. You know, from Ryoko's gem powered swords. I got 
the staff idea for Mike from none other than the Monkey King's stories. I 
got the idea for Air Drill from myself buy probably the manga where 
Kuno fights Ranma and his bokken's air pressure destroyed a statued 
influenced me sub-consciously. Hope I'm doing better with the 
descriptions.

Preview of Part VII: We're movin'...




                            
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______________________________________________________________________________
 Member of the #ShAS#: Shampoo Appreciation Society - Our favorite femaline!
	  jackji@efn.org - Jack Ji - http://www.efn.org/~jackji