-Richard

Like someone else already said, a nice 3d view of Nabiki and Kuno.

You still kept Nabiki as Nabiki but gave us a fuller explantion of her
motives.  I like the bit about the ledger at the end.

When Mrs Tendo shows up, you might want to add some dialog/thoughts for
Nabiki, does she "see" her mother often?  Did she have it alot just after
the death but less as time went on and this is the first in a long time?
Just suggestions to consider of course.

Keep of the series, who is next, Akane, Kodochi and/or Kuno, Ukyou, or Ryouga.
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Ben L. Harrison - HM1(FMF)/USN/RET
Harriso3@ix.netcom.com
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Anime Excuse #212: Went  on a  mission with the  Lovely Angels
Anime Excuse #213: Tried to help Linna start her car