Chapter III
Learning to Let Go

	Ranma sank to the floor against the wall and thought, "Wow."
	*drip* *drip*
	Ranma looked down at the floor and noticed a bright patch of of red on the
white tile floor.
	"What the...?" he wondered, than realized, reaching up to his nose and
feeling the wetness, that his nose was bleeding. He began to laugh quietly.
	"Oh man..." he thought... "Now I am turning into RYOUGA....?!"
	With that thought of Ryouga, he grimaced and clenched his fists.
	He thought, "Damn that pig! If he hadn’t interrupted....!" Ranma paused
mid-thought, realising the direction his thoughts had turned. "If he
hadn’t... then what?" he wondered.
	Ranma wondered again how he felt about Akane. This, this, KISS, changed
everything. With the two of them before, it had always been a forced
engagement. Most situations and relations they experienced were what other
people had wanted for them, or not wanted for them, and they never got to
think about what they, Ranma and Akane, wanted.
He had admitted (to himself), when he held her in his arms after fighting
Saffron, thinking he had lost her forever, that he thought he loved her.
Whatever love was.
	He still couldn’t tell her how he felt… or how he THOUGHT he felt… he had
tried... and tried. Every time he tried to talk to her about his thoughts
and feelings, someone or something interrupted, and sadly most of the time
it was his or her own pride. They were both so clumsy with words.
	"It is so DAMN hard!" he yelled. And he knew the real reason why he was so
afraid. It was partially because he was so unsure; if he did admit that he
loved Akane, it would mean that he would be wedded and bedded within
twenty-four hours of the "happy" event.
It would mean Shampoo, Ryouga, and Ukyou would be after him wanting his
hide. Ranma was scared of losing his freedom and his pride, not to mention
people he cared about as friends. After all, that was all he really had now.
In fact, this was the first time in his life that he had a group of friends…
he had been too busy before training all over Japan and constantly changing
schools to stop and have time to meet, much less make solid friendships with
people.
	Although they were sometimes frustratingly overbearing, and irritating, he
cared about Ukyou, and Ryouga, and even Shampoo! Half the time his thoughts
were garbled because he knew that if he made certain decisions, he would
have to lose friends. Yet…. When it came down to it… the feelings for his
friends were nothing in comparison to the feeling he had for Akane. More
than anything else... more than he could understand, he wanted to protect
Akane... to keep her  safe... and if that was love, he guessed he was in it.
After all, he had never felt like that for anyone else before. He knew he
felt a tearing at his insides whenever another male got too close to her.
The memories of Kirin, Toma, Kuno, Ryouga, Mikado, Gonsungki, Shinnosuke
(that guy had come WAY too close to making Akane like him), and others, ate
at him. He wanted to beat the hell out of anyone who got too near to his
fiancee. She was HIS.
	Ranma leaned his head back against the bathroom wall and stared blankly at
the ceiling. He had to admit it. He wanted to be able to have Akane with him
as long as he lived. He couldn’t imagine life without her. He never wanted
to lose her. Because he loved her... He loved Akane.
THAT was what love meant, he decided.
	Someone who was a part of you that you couldn’t give up. Someone who made
you feel terrible when you hurt their feelings, someone who looked at you as
if you were their hero. Someone, who, when you kissed, made you feel as if
you could do anything; light-hearted and dizzy and ready for more.
	But there was one problem still. He was half-girl.
He had thought that his curse wasn’t important any more. But it was
important; he couldn’t feel completely comfortable if he didn’t know when or
where the change was going to happen. ESPECIALLY if he wanted to be able to
give Akane what she seemed to want most- a normal life.
	Before he could love, he needed to find a cure.

*****

*2 hours later*

	Ranma sat on the deck looking out on the pond. The day had been clear
earlier, but clouds had crawled up in the sky and turned the blue dome to
grey. Ranma was still thinking about the kiss, Akane, and a plan that was
beginning to develop in his mind. He wondered what Akane was thinking- it
had been over two hours since the incident and she still hadn’t come out of
her room. Was she waiting for him to come upstairs to talk to her?
	Should he go up and check? What was Akane....
	Ranma’s thoughts were suddenly interrupted by the glomping of a bubbly,
cooing, purple mass of Chinese girl that was Shampoo.
	"Nihao Ranma!" Shampoo said, smiling.
	Ranma stood up, quickly, Shampoo still attached to him, and abruptly pushed
her off. Shampoo landed on her behind and looked up at Ranma with surprised
eyes. Ranma looked REALLY upset. Not just irritated like usual. He obviously
did NOT want to be hugged.
	Shampoo asked quietly, "What wrong, Ranma?"
	"I just don’t want you hanging on me, OK? Why can’t you leave me ALONE for
once? I can’t deal with you today, OK? You are just going to get me into
trouble..." Ranma paused. Trouble? He frantically began to look around,
hoping that Akane had not seen Shampoo’s hug. He didn’t see any mallets
coming at him, so he figured he was safe. For now.
	"I have GOT to get rid of her," Ranma thought, and began to say, "Shampoo,
we need...."
	"RAAAAAANNNNNNMMMMMMAAA!!!" someone shouted, and Ranma looked up to see a
-very- angry Ryouga storming toward him.
	Ranma grunted, "Talk about being between a rock and a hard place!"
	When Ryouga came close enough, Ranma surprised him by giving Ryouga a
western-style punch-in-the-nose... which knocked Ryouga into the pond again.
Ranma went over, picked up the squealing P-chan, grabbed Shampoo’s hand, and
dragged them both out the Tendo gate to the streets outside.
	"Where you take us Ranma?" Shampoo asked, curious.
	"Just be quiet until we get there, OK?" Ranma growled.
	Shampoo was pretty dense at times, but she got the hint this time and said
nothing until they arrived at a grassy park.
	Ranma sat down and Shampoo followed suit. Ranma plopped P-chan down on the
table in front of them.
	"Look, guys," Ranma began, "It is about time I said something to the both
of you."
	Ranma turned to Shampoo and said, "Shampoo... I have to tell you that I can
never return your affection or care about you the way you want me too....
I....I....." Ranma shut his eyes and clenched his fists. Finally he got out,
"I care about Ak....err...someone ELSE too much to ever marry you."
	Ranma opened his eyes. Shampoo was looking down at her hands. Finally, she
tilted her head up and looked at Ranma with tear-filled amber eyes. She
said, quivering, "The law says... Ranma... you MUST...."
	"That isn’t my law! It is your stupid law! You can’t force me to feel the
way you want me to! I can’t! I’m sorry!" Ranma shouted at her.
	Shampoo stood up and said, "Shampoo will never give up. NEVER!"
	Shampoo was about to turn around and run off when Ranma grabbed her hand
and pulled her back.
	"Whatever Shampoo. But I am not done yet. Can you stay for a minute
longer?" Ranma asked her, still holding her arm.
	Shampoo sniffled, but sat down again.
	Ryouga, surprisingly, had sat quietly through Ranma and Shampoo’s
conversation. Ranma finally turned to him, picked him up, and handed him to
Shampoo. Both the pig and the Chinese girl looked confused.
	Ranma stared at both of them, a fierce look in his eyes, and then said, "I
am going back to China. I want both of you, and Mousse, and probably Pop, to
come with me if you want to get cured. I know the springs are gone, so that
option is out, but I want to ask the Guide and the elders of your village,
Shampoo, to see if they know of any other legendary springs."
	Shampoo’s eyes grew, as did Ryouga’s.
Ranma finally concluded sharply, "It is TIME we go find what weneed."
	Shampoo squeaked out, "Ranma want go back to China with Shampoo? But..."
	Ranma shook his head and said, "For the SPRINGS, Shampoo. I want to be a
whole guy again." He looked down at the black piglet and added, "Ryouga…
come with me, I know you could never find Jusenkyo without me."
	Ryouga had closed his eyes, obviously thinking.
	Ranma put his hand on Shampoo’s shoulders and looked down at her. He said,
firmly, "Shampoo... I can’t marry you. I just can’t. Even if I wanted to… my
family honor makes me have prior engagments."
	Shampoo looked a little hopeful… family honor… ?
Ranma saw the glint and added, "But I DON’T want to… I don’t love you,
Shampoo. Not as anything else but friend. But I DO want you to find a cure
too… if you want one."
	Shampoo hung her head. Finally, she looked up into Ranma’s eyes and said,
"I love you Ranma."
	Ranma shut his eyes, sighed, and then said,"I know you do, Shampoo. I like
you, a lot, but… I haven’t ever tried to lead you to believe that I loved
you back. You KNOW that. I am… I am so sorry..."
	Shampoo pulled away from Ranma slowly, and sat P-chan on the bench. Ranma
opened his eyes and saw Shampoo walking away. She called over her shoulder,
"Shampoo think about it. Shampoo talk to Mousse. Shampoo will talk to Ranma
later."
	Ranma couldn’t tell from her voice what she was thinking. He supposed he
would have to wait until later to find out. Ranma sat down on the bench next
to Ryouga and said, "Well, P-chan?"
	Ryouga growled, and then sighed. Finally he nodded. Ranma smiled and said,
"Cool, man! OK... let’s go get you some hot water... there are some things I
want to talk to you about."

*****

	A few minutes later, after a quick stop by a nearby tea-shop, for hot
water, Ryouga and Ranma were walking down an unnamed street in Nerima.
	"So you really mean to do this, eh Ranma?" Ryouga asked.
	Ranma nodded.
	Ryouga stopped and leaned against the wall that bordered the street.
Finally he said, "What about Akane? Are you just going to take off and leave
her after what you DID today?"
	Ranma stepped right up to Ryouga and put his fist in Ryouga’s face, saying,
"Ryouga... Forget about Akane, OK? I don’t care if you want to be her
friend, but she was never and will never be anything more than that to you.
What you saw today... that is our business, OK? Back off. I....you know
I...." Ranma flushed.
	Ryouga sighed, feeling his heart of glass break, and muttered, "Love her?"
	Ranma grunted something that was probably a yes.
	Ryouga turned away from Ranma and punched a -very-large hole in the street
wall. Ranma just looked at him for a moment, knowing that Ryouga had to
accept this, but also understanding it hurt him. Finally Ranma said, "I’m
sorry, Ryouga... Akane and me just ain’t good at this stuff... but I think
that we..." Ranma broke off.
	Ryouga was nodding. He turned to face Ranma, a little pale, but at least
not getting depressed enough to do his depression blast. Ranma was surprised
to see Ryouga finally smile a crooked smile, one fang poking out over his lip.
	"What?!" Ranma asked, getting worried.
	Ryouga just clapped Ranma on the shoulder and said, "I am just surprised,
Ranma. I didn’t think you had it in you. It is about time."
	Ranma went through 30 different shades of red.
	Ryouga added, "But I want you to know… I WILL always love her… even if she
is with you. She is the kindest soul in the world, and if you ever treat her
harshly…" he clenched his fist, "….Know that I will not forgive you! I care
only about her happiness!"
"Um... yeah... whatever. HEY!" Ranma suddenly thought of something. He
shouted at Ryouga, "I don’t care what you feel… or if you continue to
protect her… just as long as her ‘hapiness’ that you are protecting is her
relationship with me! And one more thing… no more advances and NO more
‘P-Chan’ either, ya hear?"
	Ryouga frowned and said, "Well I can’t exactly help that.... but I will do
my best to stay out of Akane’s way when it happens, OK? We will be cured
soon, so..."
	Ryouga noticed Ranma still looked ready to throttle him.
	Ryouga backed up and added, "Uh... and I will stay out of her bed. I
promise. OK?"
	Ranma nodded, lowering his chi energy and relaxing.
	Ryouga thought up a question for Ranma. "Hey Ranma... how are we going to
GET to China? Do you have any  money?"
	Ranma frowned and said, "Are you kidding? With Nabiki ‘the extortionist’
around all the time?"
	"Ranma, you idiot! What are we going to do now then?" Ryouga yelled, baring
his fangs.
	"Cool it man!" Ranma said, putting his hands out to stop Ryouga. "I have an
idea.... let’s go to Ucchan’s....I think we might be able to get jobs there!"
	Ryouga frowned. "What about Konatsu?"
	"You didn’t hear?" Ranma asked.
	Ryouga shook his head negatively and said, "Hear what?"
	"Oh, I forgot you were lost...."
	Ryouga growled.
	Ranma sighed. "Oh stop it, jerk. Well, Ucchan told me that Konatsu got a
job as a ninja for this really rich family.... what was their name? Mendai?
Menda? OH YEAH! Mendou. Fighting aliens and perverts and guarding octopi or
something like that."
	"Really?" Ryouga asked, surprised, "I thought he was totally in love with
Ukyou?"
	"Yeah. No kidding!" Ranma nodded (having secretly hoped that Ukyou would
like Konatsu back so that he could write off one of his several fiancees),
adding, "I was surprised too. I talked to Ucchan though, and she told me she
had finally told Konatsu that she just wasn’t, and would never be,
interested in him like that."
	Ryouga’s eyes widened at that.
Ranma continued, "He thought it was because he was so poor, or because he
was too feminine, so he got this job to try and prove himself. I guess he is
set for life now guarding the Mendou Mansion... but it wasn't the money, she
just didn’t like him like that."
	"Poor guy." Ryouga said, understanding how Konatsu felt.
Ranma suddenly grabbed Ryouga’s hand and started to drag him toward the
Okonomiyaki Restaurant. Ryouga sputtered, "Stop that, it is embarrassing!"
	Ranma stuck out his tongue at Ryouga and said, "More embarrassing than you
getting lost?"
	Ryouga flushed.
	Ranma added, "So, anyway, Ucchan is looking for a couple of waiters! And it
is better than working at the Nekohantan!" Ranma shuddered, remembering
working for Cologne.
	Ryouga tried to pull his hand free from Ranma’s, saying, "Lemme GO, Ranma!"
	Ranma just kept dragging Ryouga along, saying over his shoulder, "Oh c’mon,
P-chan! You would never make it to the bathroom if someone didn’t lead you!"
	Calling Ryouga a pig and insulting his direction sense in one sentence was
not a good idea.
	"RANNNNNMMMMMAAAAAA!"
	Ranma let Ryouga go and began to run toward Ucchan’s, letting Ryouga stay
close enough behind him not to get lost, but just enough ahead to stop
Ryouga from catching him. Ranma felt more relaxed than he had in a long,
LONG, time. He smiled.
	Ranma turned around, pulling down the bottom lid of one eye and stuck out
his tongue shouting, "Biiiiiiiiiiahhhh!!!!" and then began to laugh.
	"RANNNNNNNNNNNMMMMMMMMMMAAAAAA!"
	Ranma chuckled, and kept running.
Marisa Price
marisa@gladstone.uoregon.edu
Anime Page!!! includes my Ranma and MI picture pages!!
http://gladstone.uoregon.edu/~marisa/
Mermaid Saga Web Page!!
http://gladstone.uoregon.edu/~marisa/mermaid.html
Member of COR and UDIC.
Anime otaku forever! Medieval Studies and English major.