Perhaps if there were hyphens where the words were cut off, more people 
would know it was cut off intentionally.  I thought it was a file error at 
first too, but even then it wasn't a problem.  There was one major 
inconsistency, though.

     Yeah, something to let us know that they were in the middle of thought,
while helping us see that this was simultaneous.

Otherwise, it's a good story.  Mike, don't explain why the dojo gets blown 
up; you might even want to take out the bit about the snipers.  The 
explosion is a lot darker if nothing gloomy happens ahead of it.

     I don't agree, here. If that were to happen, the story wouldn't make
any sense. We wouldn't have an explanation for the events (espeically why
Dr. Tofu was at the dojo).
--
Ben Kosse bmk7411@cs.rit.edu
BGC Otaku and worshipper of the Red-Eyed Goddess and her music.
Anime, RPG's, computers, poetry (read/write), music (listen/compose).
Author of the Bubblegum Crisis theme pack (see the homepage below).
Homepage with anime and other interests. (http://www.rit.edu/~bmk7411)