Well, I have returned to this ML after having been gone the better
part of the semester.  And what a coincidence, my grades have dramatically
improved. ^_^ Anyway, this time I'm here not only to comment and critique,
but to be commented on and critiqued(note: critiqued NOT criticized). This
is Part One of my fanfic, so read it and like it.  I suppose this is the
beta version, depending on if the need to change it arises.  Like it says
at the bottom, all flames praises, etc.  welcome(see Roy, I told you I'd
post it). 

Duane L. Pinnock  	
LOR

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
	It was a (a)typical day in the district of Nerima. Two people
could be seen running at a pace that would make a certain young woman at
Graviton High proud. However no one blinked an eye as these two tore
through the suburb. 

	"C'mon Ranma we're gonna be late," Akane yelled as she made her 
way toward Furinkan High. It seemed to her that they never could make it 
to school on time, no matter how early they left. Something always 
delayed them; Shampoo parking her bike on the head of some innocent 
bystander to ask Ranma for a date, Ryoga challenging Ranma to a fight, or 
one(perhaps even both)of the Kunos attempting to do all of the above. And 
let's not forget Ranma getting wet(that always seemed to happen)and 
requiring hot water from Dr. Tofu. The more she thought about it, the 
more she realized that it was Ranma that always made her late. She had 
never been late before he had shown up. Why do I put up with it, she 
thought. She looked up at him as he ran on the fence. As she regarded 
him, she knew instantly why she put up with it. He was smiling. Akane 
smiled to herself; is he thinking about me, she wondered.

	For his part Ranma, was thinking about the breakfast he had wolfed
down earlier this morning. Thankfully Kasumi had beaten Akane to the
kitchen and cooked. It had been excellent, as usual. And before that, he
had taken it to the old man in their morning workout. And on top of all of
that, Happosai hadn't been seen for over a week. If they were lucky some
women's group had finally caught up with the old lech and he was doing
hard time for all of his exploits. The day was looking up, even if he did
have to go to school. That was when he noticed that Akane smiling at him,
and the good feeling he'd been experiencing flew from him on wings of
uncertainty.  What is she smiling about, he thought. And why isn't she
looking where she's going? 

	This particular issue was soon resolved as Akane ran into 
someone. Ranma jumped off of the fence to help her up, as she apologized 
to the stranger.

	"I'm sorry," she told the stranger, "I should have been watching 
where I was going."

	"Yeah," Ranma added "You gotta excuse her, she's just naturally 
clumsy. She--ughf!" Ranma failed to finish his sentence because he was 
having trouble speaking around the fist in his mouth. The owner of that 
fist was apologizing again.

	"I'm sorry," Akane bowed. It was then that she took notice
of the stranger into whom she had bowled. He could have been described as 
handsome if his features hadn't been quite so angular. It instead give 
him a rather cold, fixed visage. He smiled at Akane. A smile that made 
her shiver.

	"Beautiful young women who run into to me needn't apologize. As a 
matter of fact, I thank you for the chance to make your acquaintance." He 
smiled again, with similar effect. "My name is Maru Omu. And yours is?"

	"Akane Tendo," she answered.

	Ranma, who seldomly picked up on subtlety, noticed Akane's 
unease. "Yeah well, that's great but we've got to get to school so we'll 
be seeing you. C'mon Akane." Ranma grabbed her hand and started off.

	"Well, I hope I 'run' into you again Akane Tendo," Maru called to
their retreating forms. He added one more thing before they were out of
earshot. "And your little brother too." 

	Ranma stiffened at the comment. He was about to turn around and
'correct' this guy's 'misunderstanding', but Akane kept a firm grip on his
wrist and practically dragged him away. 

	Maru smiled, as he noticed the effect his words had had on the
young man, and continued on his way. He had not really thought that that
had been her little brother. If Maru was correct, that young man was Ranma
Saotome. Had not the considerable aura emanating from him given it away,
the name of the girl with him and his protective attitude toward her
certainly would have. So far this morning he had met, if that was indeed
Ranma Saotome, two of the last three names on the list. The lovely young
Akane Tendo and her formidable fiance who was, if the report was to be
believed, the best fighter Nerima had to offer. His day was looking up. He
removed a notebook from his briefcase and perused it's contents as he
walked. He was exactly right; that young man _had_ been Ranma Saotome. 
Maru kept making his way to the whereabouts of the fourth name on the
list. It would take him a while to get there, navigating these unfamiliar
streets, but he was in no hurry. His day was looking up indeed. 

	Ranma and Akane were very late, and consequently residing outside
in the hall. Ranma had a frown on his face and(for once)looked to be in
deep concentration. 

	"...and Shampoo," Akane was saying in hushed tones "we can never get
to school on time. If you're going to continue to be so popular with the
girls AND the guys, then I'm going to start walking to school alone..."
Akane, in usual fashion, was holding Ranma accountable for things
completely beyond his control. It made her feel better to hold somebody
responsible. "....Ranma. Ranma, are you even listening to me? RANMA!!" 

	"Huh, what?" Ranma broke from his reverie and directed
his attention to Akane.

	"What's with you?" Akane asked. It wasn't often that one
could find Ranma in deep thought.

	"That guy we met today, you know, Maru Omu. Something
about him really bugs me." 

	Akane nodded her head in agreement. While it may have been true
that one didn't often find Ranma in deep thought, he was generally a very
good judge people. If something about Maru Omu bothered Ranma, then
something about Maru Omu was bothersome. 

	"I thin--" She was about to agree with him, when he pounded
his fist into his hand.

	"Akane, I've got to go," Ranma interrupted. "If you see that guy
again, don't talk to him," he admonished. "Turn around and go the other
way." 

	Akane, however, wasn't to pleased with being given orders. "I can
take care of myself, Ranma," she informed him. "Besides, I thought you
said you were leaving." 

	"What am I worried about, anyway?" Ranma asked himself audibly, as
he turned and started walking away. "He'd have to be crazy or stupid to go
after a tomboy like you."  Unnoticed by Ranma, Akane started glowing blue.
"Still," he added without turning "just remember what I said, all right?" 

	Akane's glow disappeared.  She watched as Ranma took off in his 
usual fashion(he jumped out of the window and on to the roof).  When 
Hinako-sensei came out to check on them and asked her where Ranma was, 
Akane told her that Ranma wasn't feeling very well and had gone to the 
nurse's office.  Hinako-sensei studied her intently and came to a 
conclusion.  Akane was a poor liar.  

	Ukyo looked up as the door to her restaurant opened. This wouldn't
have been any cause for concern on a normal day, except that today she
hadn't unlocked the door. She was closed for the day to do her books. 
That was why she wasn't in school. She reached up on the wall behind her
to grab the Big-Ass Spatula and teach this intruder the error of his ways,
however, before her hand reached the spatula, she noticed that it was only
Ranma. 

	"Ranchan," she called cheerfully "what are you doing here? 
Shouldn't you be in school? Wait, let me guess, Akane tried making you 
lunch again."

	"Not quite, Ukyo," he replied. "I need to talk to you about 
something though."

	"Well," Ukyo said "I guess I can take care of this later.  C'mon
let's go upstairs." Ranma looked uncertain. "Don't worry,"  she chided as
she turned and started to make her way up to her home above the
okonomiyaki shop "I won't hurt you." 

	Ranma smiled and followed her.

	Shampoo was wiping tables down at Nekohanten and getting ready 
for the early lunch crowd. She looked at the door and sighed. I wish 
Ranma would walk through the door right now, she thought. No sooner had 
she thought the words, than did Saotome come sauntering in.

	"I wish for us to get married right away," she yelled excitedly 
in Chinese as she jumped on top of him.

	"Huh??" was the response she got from a Ranma who had not 
understood a word she had just said.

	Shampoo sighed again, and got down off of him. "Guess, I no get 
three wishes after all," she told herself in her signature Japanese. "So 
Ranma," she asked "you here to take Shampoo to date?"

	"No!" Ranma replied emphatically. When he saw Shampoo's eyes 
narrow he thought better of his answer. "I mean, no not right now. I 
can't now; I have to talk to the old gho--I mean your great grandmother. 
Is she here?"

	"No, she no here," Shampoo answered. "She go back to China for 
few weeks. Some problem in village. And Mousse go to pickup supplies." 
The glint Ranma knew so well(it usually spelled poisoned food or disaster 
of some sort for him)returned to her eye, as she brushed his flank with 
her own. "It just us, Airen," she added seductively.

	"Damn!" Ranma said, oblivious(or faking it really well) to her 
advances. "I really needed to talk to her too."

	"Why you need great grandmother?" Shampoo inquired, curious as a
cat. 

	Ranma looked embarrassed. "Well, it's silly, but I've got to know."
When he saw the look of confusion on Shampoo's face, he decided to
explain, "I met this guy today and something about him, I don't know what,
is bothering me.  REALLY bothering me. I was hoping maybe Cologne could
help me understand what I was feeling." 

	Shampoo nodded her head in understanding. "Great grandmother say 
many time[A martial artist's instincts are usually his best allies]."

	This would probably have made Ranma feel better had Shampoo said 
it in Japanese instead of repeating verbatim(in Chinese)what Cologne _had_ 
said. Instead, Ranma fixed Shampoo with a blank stare.

	Shampoo sighed and translated it for him(to the best of her
ability anyway)"A fighter's gut is good friend." 

	"Hmph," Ranma frowned, "that sounds almost like something pop would
say.  Anyway, thanks for your help Shampoo." 

	Shampoo grinned at receiving such sincere gratitude from Ranma. 
She pushed the envelope, "Ranma can repay Shampoo for her kindness." She 
winked suggestively and waved toward a doorway Ranma knew led upstairs.

	"Sorry," Ranma voiced quickly, "gotta run!" He was out of the 
door and on a roof in under a minute.

	"Aiya," Shampoo murmured softly. She had been so close. So it 
goes, she thought and went back to her work, humming as she did so.

	Ranma contemplated his next move as he ran along the rooftops. If 
his feelings about this guy were right he should warn the friends with 
whom he hadn't yet spoken. As he was thinking about where to go 
next, he realized that he hadn't even told Shampoo who this guy was so 
that she could look out for him. He turned around and headed back toward 
Nekohanten.

	I wish Airen would come back, Shampoo thought as she worked alone 
in Nekohanten. Again, no sooner had the thought been formed than Ranma 
walked right back through the door. Shampoo jumped on him and said as 
quickly as she could in Japanese, "I wish we married right now!"

	"What??" was all she got from a flustered Ranma, as he tried to 
free himself from her enthusiastic embrace.

	Shampoo sighed. The gods were truly testing her. To Ranma she 
said, "Airen, you back. You change mind about repla-repra-repya-debt?" she 
asked.

	Ranma smiled.

	Mousse smiled as he tried to see over the bags of supplies he was 
carrying. Soon he would be home and near his precious Shampoo. Couple 
that with the fact that the old hag was out of town and expected to be 
gone for a few weeks. He had Shampoo all to himself for a few weeks. A 
few WEEKS! They would be running the restaurant, and living together, on 
their own. Almost like they were married or something. Mousse laughed 
maniacally as he thought of the untold bliss that awaited him in the near 
future. His day was looking up indeed. As he made his way to the 
Nekohanten, he saw Saotome entering. Hah! So, Saotome thought he could 
fool around with my bride to be while I'm away, Mousse asked himself 
mentally. Well he was wrong, Mousse thought, answering his own question. 
Crushing Saotome, in front of Shampoo would be the first step on the road to
happiness for he and Shampoo. Mousse set the bags down by the door and 
prepared himself for the rest of his life.

	"RANMA SAOTOME, PREPARE TO DIE!!" Mousse cried as he burst 
through the door, chains blazing. The look of shock on both of their 
faces made the moment worth Mousse's weight in gold. Mousse had the 
advantage of surprise on Ranma and succeeded in wrapping him up in chains 
before anyone else in the room could move.

	"So now what do you say, Saotome? Do you relinquish your hold on 
my darling Shampoo?" Mousse asked, flushed with success.

	"Stop stupidness, right now Mousse," Shampoo scolded from the 
other side of Ranma.

"This is for your own good Shampoo," Mousse told her.

	Meanwhile, Ranma had seemingly gotten rather angry at being tied 
up by Mousse. He flexed his arms and, in a feat that might have been more 
suited to Ryoga, broke the chains.

	"Whoah." was the joint response from the other occupants of the room.

	"Airen," Shampoo said "you never do that before."

	Ranma ignored her and grabbed what was left of the chain attached
to Mousse and pulled. Mousse, caught unawares, came flying at him only to
meet his fist in mid-air. There was a cracking sound and some blood made
is way to the floor, with Mousse following close behind. 

	Mousse knew his nose was broken and he knew something was 
terribly wrong. In the many times he and Ranma had fought, neither of 
them had ever been this injured. Something was different about him. 
Mousse looked up in time to see Ranma pull a sabre out of seemingly 
nowhere and prepare to swing a deadly arc.

	"Airen, what you doing?" Shampoo called out, as she raced to 
tackle Ranma and stop him from relieving Mousse of his head.

	She succeeded in delaying him, as he had to turn his attention
away from Mousse to deal with her. He caught her flying tackle, with one
hand, and used her momentum against her. He propelled(actually it was more
like threw)her forward using her own momentum and some he added when
applied the change of direction. The wall on the other side of the room
stopped her flight with bruising force. She struck the wall and crumpled
to the floor below her point of impact. Ranma then turned his attention
back to Mousse. 

	As he swung his blade in a downward arc, Mousse blocked with the
claws with which he had had so much success on Tougenkyo. Mousse rose to
his feet and the two squared off. It was plain to see from the outset that
Mousse was overmatched. But this really wasn't any surprise to Mousse.
What was shocking though, was that for the first time since he had
encountered Saotome, Mousse felt that he was fighting for his life.  Mousse
knew his life could be measured in minutes. Ranma smiled as he saw the
realization of his impending doom dawn on Mousse's face. 

	Then Mousse caught a glimpse of his love lying against the wall
like a broken doll. A red haze filled his vision and he pressed his attack
with renewed vigor. He forgot where he was, and to some point who he was.
He certainly forgot that he couldn't defeat Ranma Saotome. All he could
think about was that this bastard had hurt the woman he loved. The one
pure thing in his life. He had hurt

	"SHHAAAMMPOOO!!!". 

	Mousse hadn't even realized that he had yelled that last bit out
loud. He attacked Ranma savagely, with no thought for his own safety or
well being. He received numerous reminding slashes from the sabre of its
razor sharpness, but he shook these off as a bear does bee stings. An
annoying occupational hazard, for sure, but certainly not an impasse. 

	Ranma gave ground readily as Mousse advanced. He nodded his head 
approvingly at Mousse's rage, as if impressed, but not surprised. He 
seemed quite content to weather the storm as it were and let Mousse's 
rage play itself out. For all of his power and anger Mousse had not 
landed one real blow on Ranma yet. What Ranma had not counted on however, 
was a bonbori blow to the ribs. He had seen Shampoo rise and hurl 
something out of the corner of his eye and moved just in time to roll 
with the blow. Had he been a second slower his chest would have been 
caved in.

	Shampoo grabbed two more bonbori and moved to help Mousse. Her 
ribs hurt like hell and a few of them were probably broken, but that 
wasn't going to stop her. She was the greatest warrior from a tribe of 
warrior women and it would take more than a throw and a wall to keep her 
down. Not a hell of a lot more, she thought, as sharp pains laced her 
side, but more nonetheless. She jumped into the fray.

	It was lucky for Mousse that Shampoo entered when she did, for
Mousse's rage(and adrenaline)had seemingly played itself out and Ranma was
moving from defense to offense. That coupled with the blood loss from the
numerous cuts that had been inflicted upon him made almost ineffective.
And while Shampoo was a great fighter even at half or less strength, all
she was currently accomplishing was to prevent her and Mousse from getting
killed. Neither of them, separately or combined had enough strength to
defeat Ranma and from the feral grin on his face he knew it as well.  He
started pressing his attack, beating both Mousse and Shampoo back until
their backs were to the wall into which he had thrown Shampoo. 

	"Run Shampoo!" Mousse yelled as he threw himself in front of her.

	"Don't bother," Ranma laughed as he raised his sabre for a killing 
blow, "you're both finished either way."

	Ring-a-ling-a-ling. The bell on the door chimed as Ranma Saotome 
walked in.

	"Shampoo, I forgot to warn you about this guy--" Ranma stopped in 
mid-sentence as he surveyed the the scene around him. It didn't take him 
long to act afterward. He leapt at his double and immediately tore into him.

	"Kacchu Tenshin Amaguriken!" Ranma called as 403 of his 714 
punches got through his doppleganger's hastily erected defense.

	The other Ranma broke off and sneered at his adversary. "You 
don't want to fight me, 'little brother'."

	Ranma's eyes widened as his suspicions were confirmed. He assumed a 
fighting stance and prepared to continue the fight. A weary but determined 
Shampoo joined his side.

	The other Ranma however sheathed his sword and drew six daggers,
three in each hand, held by their tips. Ranma watched him curiously. If he
knows anything about me, Ranma thought, he must know that he can't throw
those and hope to get me. But throw them he did, not at Ranma however. One
hit Shampoo in her shoulder but the other two aimed at her were struck
aside by something. All three aimed at Mousse on the other hand, hit
Mousse. He could barely move enough to nod his head much less three dodge
knives.  Somehow, though, he had found the strength(and speed)to throw a
training potty and catch two of the three knives headed for Shampoo. 

	"Now little brother," the knife thrower offered, "you have a 
choice. You can continue to engage me in battle or aid your fallen 
friends. Oh, did I forget to mention that those daggers are poisoned? Silly 
me, where has my mind gone?"

	"Who are you?" Ranma yelled in anger. "What do you want?"

	"Don't worry," came the answer. "you'll know soon enough. Right 
now, I'm Ranma Saotome and I'm gonna go to school and get my fiance. I've 
got a date with name number two." He laughed, jumped through the window 
and took off down the street

	Ranma started off after him, when he felt a heavy weight fall on 
his shoulders.

	"Airen," Shampoo said weakly. "I knew he not you. I knew you come 
help Shampoo." And with that statement she collapsed in his arms.

______________________________________________________________________
	
	Well, the fact that you had the patience to get through this 
impresses me.  All comments, praises, and/or flames are welcome. 

Duane L. Pinnock
LOR
---
"Every so often we encounter the unexplainable---Menudo, Stonehenge, 
Madonna's pregnancy."
		---Dan Patrick, Sportscenter