Subject: Re: [FanFic] The Circe Project pt. 2 (beta), Blackadder
From: "David C. Yi" <ranmakun@welchlink.welch.jhu.edu>
Date: 4/21/1996, 3:07 PM
To: fanfic@fanfic.com

On Sat, 20 Apr 1996, Harold Ancell wrote:

   From: sysop@newberry.edu (Todd Hill)
   Date: Sat, 20 Apr 1996 17:46:20 +0000

   I have to wonder why Mackie went out to a prostitute to get laid.

Obvious a plot device to quickly get him out in the rain---you could
chalk it up to emotional rollercoaster he's been on.

Still, it does seem sudden and kinda odd to do it with a prostitute.  If 
he were to lose his viginity, I would have at least he were to make the 
occasion more special.  However, IMHO, I would rather that he not at all :)

   He had Nene in the shower with him (unless I misread that scene),
   and they've both indicated (mild) interest in each other in the
   episodes.

More like he could see her in the shower,   

   So they could've 'comforted' each other, letting it spill into
   celebration over losing their curses [in their eyes,
   anyway]... <feels angry glares from BGC fans> Hey, it's just a
   theory!

while everyone else was also watching....

Still, Mr. Hill has found another Lemon Departure Point :-)
Oh no!

(Or Rod Sterling could say something about entering the Lemon Zone.)

One thing comes to mind: would Nene get hurt and offended that Mackie
would see outside "comfort"?

I didn't get the sense that they were that close together for that.


Some other comments:

     "There are chains of DNA in each spring, protected by hydrogen
  bonding...

This doesn't make much chemical sense; hydrogen bonds are weak bonds
that (among many other things) give biological polymers like proteins
and DNA some of their 3D structure.  They couldn't actually *protect*
a DNA strand in water.

  When you are soaked with water from it, the chains enter your
  body and attach themselves to your own DNA.  In other words...when you fell
  in...you gained the DNA of a woman.  There...there are a few other things,
  but I haven't figured them out yet...It could be black magic, for all I
  know."

I'd advise dropping the mention of hydrogen bonding, and stick to
"black magic", at least until any of us can come up with an something
to explain how most every cell in a body could get semi-instantly
infiltrated with foreign DNA (without lysing the victims cells...).

I agree.

And there's the minor detail of how such major physical changes could
be triggered by hot and cold water, even with the added "DNA of a woman".

Nanotech could do it, but it is awefully powerful to realisticly
introduce into any universe.  Still, Jusenkyo could be the ancient
site of a crashed spaceship of an alien race that had nanotechnology....

Hmmmm, that would give Genom an additional reason to set up shop there.

It would be quite a plausible explanation, but it definitely opens up a 
new can of worms ... this would require quite a bit of thinking and 
planning so that you don't write yourself into a corner later on.  It 
would also leave open the possibility for a cure to the curse.

After the KSes figured out what happened, wouldn't they at least make
an attempt to find out if Linna had survived (or was held captive),
however unlikely (including the injuries sustained in breaking her
suit from the inside)?

I would have thought that Sylia would have thought that Linna got changed 
into some other form which they should go looking for.  But then, she 
would have to be careful of the trap.  It isn't like her to just give up 
on Linna.

I wonder if Mackie would have balked at the high heels....

Although the premise sounds interesting, I seem to get the idea that 
Mackie has to be a girl in order to use the hardsuit ... what's the 
rationale for that?  (as opposed as remaining a guy, after all, he had 
his own suit, albeit bulkier)

Also, these two line read like they're said by different people:

  her head.  "Just...don't make it a habit of dressing up like that, okay?"
Ranma might suggest that Mackie dress in unisex clothing


       "Why did you wear that, anyway?"

Ranma speaks both these lines; you ought to drop the first close
quote, or whatever.

Anyway, keep up the good work, I'm looking forward to more (and I' not
a BGC fan).
:)

<extra lines cut down by LRM-20's>

This story sounds quite promising.  It is still quite rough and needs 
more characterization (it goes too fast), but some hard work can remedy that

David ".sig char applied for' Yi :)

    \/\/ /___ /    ___             _       \/     v                  _  
     \/ /<')_><   <')_><        \ / \       o    /'>               ><'>  
      \/ / \/  ___              )(=(')       \/V #                  _  
       \/ \/  <')_><            / \_/         \/ \/   V ._. V     ><'>  VVV
        \\/            \\|//                   \ /     <(_)>             V
-,V-.;'./^\-='+-""+o-_#./^\_.='-=O'-=.w-.'~.*-.='-';=.'^^ ^^'O=.+-n.[-=*_'.,
David C. Yi's Internet Aquarium - Ranma 1/2-BGC-Porco Rosso-Laputa-MI-KOR