This is my first real C & C on a fanfic on this ML, so please be 
patient with me, as I know no real rules and regs when it comes to 
advice, and since I seem to be able to find at least ONE person on the 
MLs who takes offense at what I say.

	Anyway, I like the idea for this one.  I think it has some 
serious potential, except for one small thing. . .I don't honestly think 
that Ukyo would throw in the towel quite so easily.  Although my only 
exposure to her has been at the whims of Great Viz, Machine of Life and 
Controller of my Soul, I have noticed that Ukyo tends to be a bit more 
lively when it comes to a challenge.  Unless this particular disease is 
so debilitating that it could batter her psychological 'defenses' to almost 
nothing in three days, I just don't think she'd give in so quickly.  A 
little more grit in her part and this would be a really WICKED story.

	Just a bit of advice, not a flame or anything.  Who am I to 
argue?  Part 1 of my own fanfic still isn't complete, and I have no idea 
when it will be, so I am certainly no expert.

                                          Nathan
                             Guard of the Church of Ryoga
                Filling in for the comatose Ryoga Hibiki, WBB, FP-Chan

	PW:  <I liked it as well.  Waste the tramp.>
	SHUT UP!!