Well... my first fanfic for the list. I won't ask "Be kind," since I want 
honest criticism... but be gentle, OK? :)


Another Way to Travel, Part I 
=============================

Three people sat in an office. The first -- a young woman with a bushy 
shock of bright red hair -- sat casually, half sprawled across her chair. 
The second -- another young woman with long, straight black hair -- sat 
calmly, looking up with her hands clasped in her lap. The third -- an 
older man, with threads of grey in his brown hair and stress lines etched 
into his face -- sat behind a desk facing the other two, leaning forward, 
hands clamped on the desk in a white-knuckle grip.

"Hey, Chief, no problem," Kei was saying. "All we have to do is go to 
this planet, find this guy Keffer, and ask him about that funny ship he's 
supposed to have seen..."

"It's a lot more complicated than that, and you know it," the Chief 
growled, looking dyspeptic. "The planetary government is notoriously 
touchy, and it's going to take a lot of diplomacy for you to get in and 
interview him. Frankly, I don't know why..."

"Yeah, yeah," said Kei. "We know," Yuri said with a slight smile on her 
face. "Frankly, you don't know why the computer picked us to do this 
job," they finished in chorus.

The Chief exploded out of his chair, leaning forward and slamming his 
palms down on the desk. "I don't think you two realise--" he shouted, 
then stopped and took a deep breath. "I don't think you two realise," he 
said in a calmer voice, "just what position the fallout from your last 
assignment has put you in." 

"I know the last assignment didn't end well," Yuri said softly. She 
stared down at her feet for a couple of moments before meeting the 
Chief's eyes. "And I really wish there was something we could have done 
about it, but it *wasn't*--"

"I know, I know," sighed the Chief, waving a hand. "There wasn't anything 
you could do, it's never your fault and the Central Computer backs you 
up. But..." He broke off, then continued in a lower tone, looking 
directly at the Pair. "I probably shouldn't be saying this, but there's 
some reason for you to be worried. Some higher-ups in United Galactica 
have been asking some very pointed questions about you two. *And* asking 
for detailed mission reports from your last several assignments. I'd be 
very careful this time around."

Kei looked at him uncertainly. "But... we aren't under the direct 
authority of United Galactica. As a private organization, they can't 
dictate to us... right?"

"Officially, no," the Chief said. "But you know as well as I do what 
pressures United Galactica can bring to bear on the WWWA, if they really 
want to. And I hear the Chairman himself is taking a personal interest in 
this case."

"Would he be willing to override the judgement of the Central Computer?" 
Yuri asked quietly.

The Chief looked soberly back at her. "It'd be better for you if you 
don't have to find that out."


The Professor walked out of the Snow Entomological Museum wing towards 
the main Snow Hall entrance. He was halfway down the hallway when he was 
stopped by a voice in a moderately thick Sinhalese accent. "Professor! 
What are you doing here?"

The Professor turned around. "Kanishka! You're still hanging around here?"

"More or less," Kanishka replied with a smile. "I'm working for a local 
networking company... but I'm also taking some non-degree-seeking 
courses, and working for the university as a graduate assistant. A staff 
position keeps a few channels open, as you know." He grinned 
conspiratorally as he said that, then paused. "And there are certain 
advantages to being on-staff an educational institution." He turned 
around, and beckoned the Professor after him. "Come on, I'll show you." 

"So, just what is it you're doing at KU these days?" the Professor asked 
with a quizzical smile, as he turned to follow Kanishka.

"Many things," Kansishka said, smiling secretively as they walked through 
the entranceway and down another hallway. "Many things."


"There must be another way to travel,
    There must be another car to choose,
 I'll tell the story straight,
    I hope it's not too late
 For the Bright Street Beachhouse Back in Business Blues,
    Back in Business Blues!"
   -- "Bright Street Beachhouse Back in Business Blues," Cats Laughing, 
_Another Way to Travel_


ANOTHER WAY TO TRAVEL

A Dirty Pair fanfic by Travis Butler

Many thanks to the Undocumented Features crew for writing such wonderful 
stories; I freely credit them with the major inspiration for this story. 
But don't blame them for any mistakes -- those are mine alone, to hold. 
To cherish. To... all right, I'm laying it on too thick here, aren't I? 
<g>

Kei and Yuri created by Haruka Takachiho

Doctor Who created by Verity Lambert; Block Transfer Computation created 
by Christopher H. Bidmead

Copyright (c) 1996 by Travis Butler


One: Backward Message
---------------------

"There's a backward message hidden in this music,
    Designed to make your children lose control.
 There's a backward message hidden in this music,
    To get our talent we all sold our souls..."

   -- "Backward Message," Steven Brust, _A Rose for Iconoclastes_
   

Kanishka beamed as he opened the door, waving the Professor inside. The 
Professor went in, and a slow smile crossed his face as he saw the system 
sitting beside Kanishka's desk.

"Do you like it?" Kanishka asked.

"A PowerStorm 250 minitower," the Professor said, in an 
I-should-have-expected-this tone. "250 mHz PowerPC 604e, 64 meg RAM and a 
2-gig hard drive standard. Why am I not surprised?" He turned, and looked 
over his shoulder with a raised eyebrow.

"What, you don't get to play around with fancy toys like this any more?" 
Kanishka asked as they both sat down in front of the screen.

"Oh, sure," the Professor replied. "I'm always playing around with state 
of the art equipment." He grinned wryly. "Usually a minimum of two to 
three years *after* it was the state of the art." He picked up the mouse, 
opened a folder, and launched Photoshop. After loading a couple of 
images, he tried some complex filter operations, and whistled as they 
finished in a few blinks. "I like," he said in tones of undisguised envy, 
glancing mock-sourly at Kanishka.

Kanishka glanced down at an object the Professor had set down on the 
desk. "And what is this?" he asked, picking it up. It was about the size 
of a trade paperback, in a black vinyl sheath. "A Newton?"

"A MessagePad 100," the Professor said, taking it and pulling it out of 
its protective cover. "I picked it up when they were closing them out for 
about $150. Though this time I got something that was only about a year 
and a half behind the times when I found it, so perhaps I shouldn't 
complain too hard." He flicked it on with his thumb, pulled the stylus 
out of its side holder, grinned again with a raised eyebrow, and handed 
it to Kanishka.

Kanishka scribbled a few words on it, and looked intently at the screen 
as it translated his handwriting. "+ his ls u test," he read. "I think 
the handwriting recognition is about as good as I've been led to believe."

The Professor winced a little. "Well, it's certainly not perfect," he 
said. "I usually get about 80% to 90% accuracy... not superb, but good 
enough to be usable, given the Newton's other advantages. And it's still 
faster than it would be trying to type on a keyboard small enough to fit 
something this size."

Kanishka stood thoughtfully for a moment, looking inward. Then he nodded 
to himself and looked at the Professor. "I, uh... think I remember seeing 
a copy of the new OS update for this, on one of the beta sites I have 
access to." At the Professor's questioning look, he went on. "I could 
pull it down and install it for you, if you'd like. It should improve the 
handwriting recognition quite a bit... er, and it's supposed to be 
noticably faster."

"Isn't it supposed to be a ROM upgrade only?"

"Well, if it is, I happen to have a ROM burner in the back room." 
Kanishka smiled. "Don't worry, we'll make it work, somehow. And if worst 
comes to worst... well, I think I could scrape up $150 for a 
replacement." He cocked his head at the Professor, with a twinkle in his 
eye. "If you want to sit here and play around with this a little, I'll go 
into the other room and see if I can dig it up for you."

"Oh, great," the Professor said, burying his face in his hands before 
looking up. "All right, all right," he said, chuckling and waving his 
arms in surrender. "Go ahead and play with it, while I play with this new 
toy of yours."


Kei leaned back in her seat as the Lovely Angel set off for Drauzur. "All 
right, so it's a planet of hotheads. So what else do we know about it?"

"Hotheads." Yuri looked over at Kei for a moment, before turning back to 
the computer screen. "Only you, Kei..." She shook her head. "For those of 
us who weren't daydreaming during the mission briefing, the Drauzuri were 
originally a group of refugees from the PolitiCultur Purge on Rushelms, 
about a hundred years ago--"

"*Real* bunch of winners they are," Kei broke in disgustedly. "Not a 
single decent bit of nightlife on the entire planet."

Yuri nodded. "You're telling me! Going around swathed in robes from head 
to foot the entire time we were there was not *my* idea of fun." She 
caught herself, stopped, and glared at Kei. "To get back to the 
subject... The original settlers left Rushelms, for reasons *some* of us 
can understand, and were looking for a planet to settle on. The UG gave 
them Drauzur, and for the first 70 or so years, they were quite happy 
building their own little paradise and not-so-cordially ignoring the rest 
of the galaxy."

"All right, so then what happened? It's not as if this hasn't happened 
before, you know." Kei yawned. "I fell asleep in history class somewhere 
around the fifth example. So what's different here?"

"*Here* they managed to settle on one of the galaxy's biggest deposits of 
vizorium," Yuri said. "Surely they covered the location of the major 
vizorium deposits in your galactic astrography courses," she added 
disapprovingly.

Kei looked back angrily. "Yeah, so? Just *who* did I have to explain 
vizorium processing to in the first place? Seems like someone wasn't 
paying attention in her Materials Physics course..."

"Why, you--"

Mughi woke up from his nap, gave a mournful howl, and looked back and 
forth between the two. He stood still for a moment, then began backing 
away slowly and carefully. The Pair stared at him, then looked at each 
other, and broke out laughing.

A couple of minutes later they both ran down. Kei sighed, and wiped her 
brow. "Whew. I needed that."

"Me, too," said Yuri. "Sorry about that, partner." She smiled 
apologetically at Kei. "To get back to the briefing... They discovered 
vizorium on Drauzur, and that inspired half the planetary governments in 
the area to try a land grab. The Drauzuri fought back, and finally United 
Galactica had to step in to prevent a bloodbath. They worked out an 
arrangement: the other planets would keep their hands off Drauzur, but 
the Drauzuri would have to mine and make the vizorium available to the 
galaxy at large -- instead of maintaining isolation, as they no doubt 
would have prefered. United Galactica was more or less volunteered to 
monitor the agreement and make sure all sides followed through. That 
hasn't made anyone associated with the UG real popular on Drauzur."

Kei snorted. "I can believe that. How would *you* like to have someone 
watching over your shoulder when all you want is to be left alone?" She 
stopped, and looked worried for a moment. "I can really see that now," 
she said in a softer tone. "Anyway, so what's happened now? This guy 
Keffer saw some wierd alien ship, and we're sent out to debrief him?"

"Michael Keffer is a Drauzuri, one of the few who's gone off-planet. He's 
the captain of the explorer ship Jason Celestron," Yuri began.

"Well, at least his name sounds cute."

"Ahem... *Captain* Keffer saw some kind of unidentified ship after the 
Jason Celestron had a major accident with their engines. According to the 
reports that have filtered out, this ship not only didn't match any of 
the known ship profiles..." Yuri fell silent for a moment, brooding. She 
looked up at Kei. "It wasn't even recognizable as human workmanship. So 
alien that the source of the rumors claimed it gave him nightmares for a 
week."

"Nightmares?" Kei sounded skeptical. "Right. Probably someone trying to 
make it sound more important than it really was. Ten to one it'll turn 
out to be nothing when we get there." She sighed in frustration. "Well, 
ours not to reason why."

"We could use an easy one, after last time," Yuri said. 

"Uh-huh," Kei grunted. "So we need to find this Captain Keffer and ask 
him about this strange ship, without upsetting the Drauzuri government. 
Sounds pretty straightforward to me."


Kanishka walked back into the room, holding up the Newton. "I'm back. 
Enjoying yourself?"

Sounds poured from the computer, as the Professor waved his left hand 
without looking up from the screen. "This is amazing! It's incredible how 
well Marathon IV runs on this system. Smooth full-screen animation, 
stereo sound, the works!"

"What?" Kansishka walked over, and looked over the Professor's shoulder 
in time to catch him blowing away a string of Pfhor scouts. "Ah. I see. 
Where did you manage to find this... no, never mind," he said, as the 
Professor's shield failed and the viewing window dimmed out. "Here's your 
Newton. I think you'll like it."

The Professor took it and flicked it on. "Hmmm... seems to be quite a bit 
faster," he said, flipping quickly through the Extras drawer. He stopped, 
and scribbled something. "The handwriting recognition doesn't look much 
better, though."

Kanishka looked embarrassed. "Well... nobody's perfect." He tapped his 
chin for a moment, as a thought seemed to strike him. "Are you still into 
that British series... Doctor Who? I remember you doing that HyperCard 
stack back when you were working here."

"I still watch it from time to time," the Professor said, looking 
puzzled. "What brought that up?"

"Well, the other night I happened to see one of the shows that looked 
rather interesting. The one where they had an entire city set up as a 
living computer?" He looked inquiringly at the Professor.

The Professor thought for a moment. "Ah, Logopolis! That must be it. The 
last of the Tom Baker episodes." He smiled fondly. "One of the best."

"Yes, I think that was it," Kanishka said, tapping his chin again. "Where 
they were creating things out of pure mathematics."

"Right." The Professor chuckled. "Let's see... 'The essence of matter is 
structure... and the essence of structure is mathematics.' Just create a 
sufficiently detailed mathematical model, apply it with the Logopolitan 
methods of calculation, input energy, and volia! 'You can model any 
space-time event in the universe!' Unfortunately, it wouldn't run on a 
regular computer -- something about needing a living brain..."

"Hmmm... it was written in the early 1980's, wasn't it?"

"1981."

"Yes, and that was before they had parallel processing, or pipelining, or 
a distributed computing system... Perhaps they could get it running on a 
machine today."

"Perhaps. Assuming block transfer computation worked, of course." The 
Professor sighed wistfully. "Some days, wouldn't you like to have 
something like that running on your machine?" 

Kanishka looked nonplussed for a moment, then quickly recovered. "Some 
days I would," he said. Then he looked at his watch. "Whoops! I've got to 
go. There's a meeting I have to go to. You can stay around here and play 
if you like, but--"

"Don't worry. I need to get going too. I've got to try and get back up 
here again sometime."

"Yes, it's been fun." Kanishka smiled, and gestured him out the door. 
"I'll see you later on, perhaps."


Two: Amaryllis
--------------

"Amaryllis at my back door,
    Swear to God it wasn't there before.
 Growing tall from the cold hard ground,
    Red and green,
 What's a hothouse flower like this
    Doing in the land of winter's kiss?
 I do believe I've seen a sign...
    I do believe it."
   -- "Amaryllis," the Flash Girls, _Maurice and I_
    

Kei touched down gently on the roof, Yuri landing a moment later. The two 
shed their lifting harnesses and rolled into cover in one smooth motion, 
before peering across the landing stage to the entryway.

She looked over at Yuri; Yuri lifted her gun and gestured at the 
entranceway with her chin. Kei sighed, tensed, and sprang out into the 
open, darting and weaving as she sprinted over the giant red cross for 
the next bit of cover. A couple of laser blasts sang over her shoulders, 
answered by covering fire from Yuri. 

"These people believe in the sanctity of the human body?!?" Kei exclaimed 
as she scrambled behind a small structure labeled Emergency IV Units. She 
leaned forward as a shadowy figure appeared in the entranceway, and 
tensed again as it raised an arm holding a minigrenade --


"Kei, wake up!"

"Mmrfmph... huh?" Kei sat bolt upright in her seat.

"Are you okay?" Yuri asked. At Kei's nod, she continued. "I'm just about 
to take us into the Drazuri system. Could you check for the beacon?"

Kei bent over her console for a moment. "Just a minute...almost there... 
got it." She flicked a switch, and an angry voice came through the 
speaker.

"Attention, unidentified ship!" the voice snarled. "You have entered the 
territory of the People's Freehold of Drazur. We have been authorized by 
United Galactica to use deadly force in defense of our homes, and we will 
do so at the slightest provocation! You have five minutes to leave 
Drazuri territory, or you will be fired upon." A steady, measured beeping 
began, suggesting a timer counting down.

"Nice people," commented Yuri.

Kei stared at the communications board, with an expression that suggested 
smoke pouring out of her ears. "Who do these people think they are!?!" 
she shouted. "Even Rushelms doesn't threaten to shoot on sight!"

"No, they just subject you to two hours of ideology every day," Yuri 
said, deadpan.

"I'll give them a lecture on ideology they'll never --"

"Don't." Yuri reached out and stopped Kei's hand as it reached for the 
controls. "You heard the Chief. We're not to antagonize the Drazuri; the 
situation's delicate enough now." She reached out and tapped the control 
herself. "Drazuri Control, this is the WWWA ship Lovely Angel, requesting 
permission to enter Drazuri space."

The screen fuzzed with static, then cleared to show a scowling, bearlike 
man. "The WWWA," he said, in a near-twin to the voice from the beacon, 
sounding like he'd found a refugee from the sewage pit in his chili. 
"What the hell are you doing here?" he demanded insultingly. "Looking for 
another way to poke your noses into our business?" 

Yuri sighed, took a deep breath, and looked into the screen with a sober 
expression. "No, sir," she said calmly. "We're simply here to ask one of 
your residents a few questions, and then leave. We're not here to 
interfere with your government in any way."

"Right," the offical said sarcastically. "We've heard that one before. 
Every little tin-plate dictator says they're never there to interfere..."

Kei, never that good at keeping a cool head in the face of 
*un*intentional insults, had had enough. "What did you say?" She shot out 
of her chair, pushed Yuri aside, and slammed her hands down on the 
console as she leaned into the screen. "Listen, buster, we couldn't care 
less about your planet *or* your government. All we want to do is ask 
this guy our questions, and I'll be *glad* to get out of here!"

Dead silence came from the speaker, as Yuri stared at Kei in shock. Then 
she looked appalled, while Kei looked slightly embarrassed. Then a 
crackle from the speaker drew their attention back to the screen. 

"All right, Lovely Angel," the official said, in a tone of grudging 
respect. "You're cleared for landing. A Freehold volunteer will be there 
to meet you when you land."

The Pair looked at each other. "HUH?!?"

"I said, you have permission to land!" The screen cut off abruptly.

Yuri looked at Kei again, and shrugged. Then she turned to her control 
board and started landing procedures.


Three: Death on Jayhawk Boulevard
---------------------------------

"'My name is Death, so come along,
    It's getting late, we haven't long.'
 And up and down the avenue,
    Was empty as at half past two,
 Although the evening was still new."
   -- "Death on Hennepin," the Flash Girls, _The Return of Pansy Smith 
and Violet Jones_

After he got home from work, the Professor plugged in his laptop and 
dialed in to check for mail. Aside from the usual mailing list posts, 
there was one item from Kanishka waiting in his mailbox. He opened it to 
find a puzzling message:


Prof:

Get your Newton, enter "Adric activate", and tap Assist. Hurry. There 
isn't much time.

K.


He looked up from the screen, puzzled. With a mental shrug, he pulled out 
the Newton, flicked it on, and wrote "Adric activate". After correcting 
the inevitable mispelling, he tapped Assist.

<<"Escape from the Atmosphere," Mannheim Steamroller, _Fresh Aire V_>>

The screen flickered for a second, and went out. It came back on with the 
usual Reset chime, but at an impossibly high resolution. He blinked, and 
took a closer look -- 300 dpi at least. His examination was interrupted 
by a status dialog that popped up, quickly flashing a series of messages:

<<"Powerhouse," Raymond Scott by way of Carl Stalling, _The Carl Stalling 
Project_>>


Activation Check Proceeding...
Checking Environment
Checking Communications
Activating Ether Link...
Connection Established
Checking for messages...
Receiving one video message...
Disconnecting.


The dialog went away, and a new window popped up on the screen. He nearly 
dropped the Newton as Kanishka's face appeared in the window, in 
phtorealistic color, and began speaking.

"Hello, Professor," the image of Kanishka said. "I'm running out of time, 
so I'll have to make this quick. Block transfer computation is *real*. 
They've been experimenting with it here at the lab for several months 
now."

The Professor sat for a second, not really hearing. Block transfer 
computation? That explained Adric, all right, though he suspected some 
hard-core Whovians would still lynch Kansishka for that codeword...

"...but I'd really begun to worry about what's going on at the Labs, and 
some of the plans management is beginning to talk about." Kanishka was 
saying. "So I gave you a copy of the computation engine just in case, 
along with a prototype AI modelling program for feeding it data. I'm not 
really sure how it'll run on your Newton; this is the first time anyone 
has tried putting it on something that small, and there could be some odd 
interactions with the distributed processing system the NewtOS uses. I 
had enhance your Newton quite a bit to get it to run. As I'm sure you've 
noticed," he finished, chuckling a little.

"Not bloody likely I'd miss it," the Professor said out loud, even though 
he knew the recording couldn't hear him.

Kanishka's recording continued. "When you entered this mode, all of the 
artificial limits I put on it, to simulate a normal Newton, were turned 
off. You should now find it a much faster machine!" He smiled, then shook 
his head. "Anyway, back to the point. I'm giving you this key because 
things have gotten dangerous around here in the last few days. The whole 
office is tense, and there's been a lot of running back and forth between 
the older building and the new office on West Campus. Yesterday one of 
the directors announced that--"

There was a loud <Whumph> in the background, and the video went to 
static. A soft voice announced, "Transmission unexpectedly cut off by 
sender. Partial transmission sent as received." Then the video window 
disappeared. 

The Professor sat staring at the blank screen for a moment, then shot out 
of his seat. "What the heck -- that looked like his Snow Hall office in 
the background..." His voice trailed off as he grabbed his jacket and 
rushed out the door.

As he approached Snow Hall, he saw the fire truck sitting out in front, 
with lights flashing. He quickly pulled over, got out, and ran over to 
one of the firemen standing on the sidewalk. "What happened?" he demanded.

"There was a small fire in the west wing," the fireman replied. "Looked 
like it was started by some kind of electrical short or explosion."

"In the computer labs?" the Professor asked, with a sinking feeling in 
the pit of his stomach. "I was supposed to meet a friend down there -- do 
you suppose..."

The fireman looked sympathetically at him. "The fire's out now, and we're 
just starting to go in and examine the burned area. You can come down and 
wait out of the way, just... in case we find something."

"Thanks." The Professor followed the fireman into the building.

The smoke got thicker as they approached the area around Kanishka's 
office, and two firemen were just forcing the door to the office open 
when they arrived. Thick clouds of electrical smoke boiled out the door 
as it was opened. Coughing, one of the firemen put a respirator on and 
entered the room. "There's someone in here!" he cried. A moment later: 
"He's dead."

A moment later, they carried out Kanishka's body.


Acknowledgements:
-----------------

"Bright Street Beachhouse Back in Business Blues," copyright (c) 1990 
Steven Brust and Emma Bull
"Backward Message," by Steven Brust, copyright (c) 1993 Beer & Pizza, Inc.
"Amaryllis," copyright (c) 1995 Emma Bull
"Death on Hennepin", copyright (c) 1990 John Van Orman


Well... there are two or three things I'm specifically worried about:

* I'm not quite sure I've got Kei and Yuri down just right; I'm afraid I 
may have overdone their bickering a little bit.

* I haven't seen that much DP canon (the Streamline movie dubs, and three 
of the Viz-translated film comics), and I'm not sure if I've got the WWWA 
command structure quite right. Can anyone fill me in?

* I think the end to part one moves a little too fast... I know basically 
what I wanted to do, but I wasn't exactly sure how. Conversely, does any 
of the rest of the story move too slowly? Is it too "talky?"

Thanks in advance for any C&C!




Travis Butler
(The Professor, formerly of Myth and Magick!, Lawrence, KS;
 tbutler@tfs.net, now from the Wandering Powerbook;
 <http://www.tfs.net/personal/tbutler/>;
 Mac page <http://www.tfs.net/business/tbutler/>)

..Cats are the proof of a higher purpose to the universe.