[Snip!]

*slam*
[door slams shut]

KC: ...ryouga-sama...

Ryouga: ...*AIIEEEE*

*splash* 
[A splash is heard]

KC: ooh!  Ryouga-sama - you ARE an animal!

P-Chan : BWEE!?!

HG: heheheh

Kun-chan does a number of hot and cold water experiments on Ryouga, in
the closet. All of them too illegal to write on the ML due to a lot
of your ML readers being American.

P-chan: Bweeeeeee!

Ryouga: Aaaah! Ku...Kun-chan!!!!

P-chan: Bukiiiiiiii!!!!

Ryouga: OohHhhhhhhHHHHhhh!

Kun-chan: Ohohohohoho! Mmm...!

Kun-chan...

[Somewhere in here, Robma gets dragged into this... But that's irrelevant for
  Akari]

A horrified girl with pigtails listens to all of this...

Kun-chan . o O ( Since when has Akari had pigtails????? )

Akari points at the door, her eyes ablaze with firey hatred.
Akari: Katsunichi-san.... Charge.

Kun-chan . o O ( Don't you mean 'Katsu-nishiki'? Sheesh... some people! )

This, of course, sends the now terrified pig into the closet, knocking 
the door 
down and away... Akari kicks the cold water over onto Ryouga, and takes him out 
of the closet, walking away somewhere where the two of them can be alone.

Akari: And you're going to be a good little piggie, nee? *sweet smile*
P-chan: [Dazed and Confused] Bkwiii? @_@
Katsunichi-san walks slowly after them, covering their retreat.

Kun-chan growls, and teleports to the fake Akari and the fake
Katsu-nishiki and grabs P-chan, and snuggles him to her breasts, and
teleports off to the Church of Ryouga. The Church is set up with
Anti Akari and anti fake Akari and anti fans/hitmen/etc of Akari
so that none of them can get inside the holy shrine to steal the
god away from Kun-chan.

She get out the karma sutra, turning Ryouga back to normal with the
kettle held by one of the many members of the Church. Then she and
Ryouga get on with what's in the book....

Kun-chan...