Where no Ranma fic has ever gone before, I hope.


"War of the Leaves" Chapter 2

Prelude

     Genma held the shaking umbrella in front of him.  Even
within the confines of the house, he was badly frightened. 
"Saki," said Genma to himself as he shook again and couldn't
believe the chaos that was ensuing outside.  If only he could get
his hands on some saki, all would be better.  Unknowingly, he
walked in the direction of the room he and Luanma shared.  He
heard noises behind him.  Maids!!  He slipped into a room and was
surprised to find his belongings inside.  "A bucket!"  Genma
quickly tore his clothes off, grabbed the bucket and quickly
poured out the contents over him and soon was engulfed in
darkness.
     The panda sniffed, last remembering the nice girl in danger. 
It made a low sad sound deep within its throat and butted its
head against the door, which refused to move.  Then it scratched
its paw against it and made a small tear.  It butted its head
against it again, this time harder.  Then again.  Finally coming
to the conclusion that it was feasible, the panda roared and the
door exploded as maids screamed in terror.

"Plans"

     Hiroshi waited for the water to boil then poured some out
into a cup.  He dropped a couple of tea leaves in and then turned
around.  He looked between the thick wooden bars of the small
jail and stared almost in awe at the silent bent figure sitting
in the back of it.
     "Excuse me?"  Hiroshi said almost inaudibly.
     The man looked up at Hiroshi with dark unseeing eyes and
Hiroshi suddenly felt the room get colder.  Hiroshi gulped and
hoped his voice wouldn't crack then said, "Uh... tea?" then held
out the cup.
     The man just looked back down.
     Hiroshi shuffled his feet a little bit then said out loud,
"I saw what happened."
     The man looked up again quickly and saw that the guard was
still staring at his feet.
     "You were fighting all those horrible monsters.  I'm quite
sure Tendo-sama will reward you and release you once he realizes
you were here to help."  Hiroshi took a sip from the cup.  "My,
those monsters were scary.  You know, they finally found
Akane-san, she was safely hidden on the roof.  How did she get up
there?  Did you help her?  Wow.  Can you teach me to fight as
well as you do?  That would be great.  Just wonderful.  Then I
can be famous and be put in songs and some day have my own
estate.  You know, that China girl is missing?  I think she got
stolen away by those monsters and that black and white bear of
her's?  They had to chain it up, it was going mad!!  Tearing up
the room they were staying in."  Hiroshi continued talking,
getting louder and louder, never noticing the prisoner's slim
eyes getting slimmer.  Suddenly Hiroshi heard a noise, like an
arrow had cut through the air, and felt the cup jump in his hand,
making him spill the contents.  He looked at the cup and noticed
a small hole in the side and also a pebble lying at the bottom of
it.
     "BIE SHOU!!  SHUT MOUTH!!  Or next ROCK in your HEAD!!" 
Luanma held up another pebble and shot it with his finger and it
embedded itself in one of the wooden bars with a sudden sound
like thunder, putting a large crack down its length.
     Hiroshi squeaked like a mouse and dropping the cup ran out
of the small jailhouse.

     Luanma smiled a little then slumped over on his side,
breathing heavily.  He had reacted too harshly.  Some water would
have been very nice.  He sighed and then breathed in some of the
dust on the cold floor and coughed.  He was tired.  Very tired. 
That strange thing he did, whatever it was, had drained him
entirely.  It had taken all his will to stay sitting up, there
was no way he was going to pass out again and let these people do
what they want with him.  He looked at those silly wooden bars. 
With one kick he could break five of them at once.  But not now,
not in his condition.
     "I'm such an idiot," thought Luanma to himself rotating the
pebble in-between his pointer and thumb while he lay atop his
other arm.  "Why did I bother?  I should have just stayed in the
room or just took Ba-Ba and left.  Why did I get involved?  Well,
they would have all died if I hadn't... Damn it!!  This was a
perfect opportunity.  Right now I could be sitting with
Tendo-sama and eating a feast, like some visiting Chinese
official
would be treated.  No..." suddenly Luanma remembered Tendo Akane
and what she saw.  Right now she could be telling her father the
change she saw in her female guest.  Right now, Tendo could be
sharpening the blade of his sword and preparing to execute the
evil spirit that has invaded his home.  And right now, Luanma
couldn't even sit up, much less fight.  He closed his eyes and
pricked up his ears and listened for any approaching footsteps
and before he knew it, he was fast asleep.

     Akane stared at the small mirror while her servant brushed
her hair.  She had found out what had been done with her "guest"
and as of yet, had not bothered telling her father exactly what
happened.  Father was of course ecstatic to find her unharmed and
had embraced her fiercely which had surprised Akane pleasantly. 
In fact, she was happy to still be alive from that horrible
nightmare.  Everywhere lay groaning warriors bandaged up all
bloody and outside lay the corpses of those who died.  With those
corpses lay the dead bodies of the monsters too, cold evidence
that indeed the nightmare had happened.
     "But what," thought Akane to herself, "should I do about
that Chinese girl.  Boy.  No, girl."  Akane wrinkled up her nose
and pointed at herself in the mirror.  "Well, first I'll sneak
over to the jail tonight and talk with her personally myself. 
Then I'll decide whether to tell father or not."  Akane looked at
her hands and began to hum contently.  "Maybe I can give father a
son.  That would make him very happy."


     "Unnnnnnnnn!!!"  Ryouga grit his teeth as the servant bound
his arm.  "Damn bear!!"  Ryouga had wrestled down the panda,
knocking it out, but not before it had sunk its teeth deep into
Ryouga's arm.  "Boy, I was scared though, eh, Sansuke?"
     The servant just nodded.
     "What's wrong, Sansuke?  Do you mourn the deaths of our
friends today?"
     "No, Ryouga-san, none of the servants were harmed."
     "Why do you keep using "san?"  You're my best friend, after
all."
     "Nevertheless, Ryouga-san, we are now separate people.  I
have already moved your belongings to your new room.  I do
believe my lord will find it adequate."  Sansuke suddenly stood
up, bowed and left the room.
     Ryouga frowned, unsure how to react, then smiled when he saw
his newly acquired blade lying on the ground.  "Its not a new
blade, but its my blade."  Ryouga picked it up with his good arm
and took a couple of clumsy swings.  He smiled broadly and slid
it in its sheath then walked out of the room.  He walked down the
thin hallway and came upon the ruined room where he had fought
the giant bear and nearly lost.  His smile disappeared as genuine
concern entered his face.  He stood in the dark ruined room and
remembered the events earlier that day, fondly.  They had
quarreled but he couldn't help but feel something in his chest
tighten everytime he pictured her eyes, whether they be glinting
in anger or twinkling happily as she instructed him in various
fighting stances and attacks.  Ryouga held his chest and
understood a little bit why the panda went berserk.  She was
missing, possibly dead, and Ryouga too, felt anger run through
him.  He knelt down, too tired to allow his anger to take over
his mind and instead picked up the bag she carried around and
looked through it.  He picked up the other stuff lying around and
put those is the bag too.  "I'll leave these in my room until she
comes back or I find her."  Ryouga got up and stepped out the
door then suddenly peeked back inside.  Lying in the corner was
her bamboo umbrella.  Ryouga picked it up and let it rest against
his shoulder, it felt comfortable there.  Suddenly Ryouga felt
lighter.  For some reason he was sure now that she was still
alive and that soon he would get to see her again.

     Luanma sat straight up suddenly and then held his head as
everything began to spin uncontrollably.  Slowly things came into
focus and eventually Luanma was able to pry his fingers away from
his face.  Nothing had changed and it was still night.  The guard
had left the fire going and a pot containing boiling water. 
Luanma berated himself again.  How could he have fallen asleep,
especially when he was in so much danger!  At least he was
feeling a little stronger, even though he could not have possibly
have been asleep for longer than ten minutes.  Luanma stretched
out his legs and slowly got up.  He still needed to support
himself against the walls.  He looked out the small window of his
jail and noticed the nice bright moon and sighed.  But what was
that moving speck against the moon!?  It has wings!!  Like a bat
and it was getting bigger!!  Luanma stumbled back and fell down,
still staring at his window and suddenly something flew through. 
Indeed, it was like a bat.  In fact, it was a bat!!  Luanma held
his chest and breathed heavily.  The black furry creature chirped
at him from the ceiling of his jail.  Luanma said to it, "Little
creature, scaring me like that," and then stuck out his tongue.
     The bat dropped from the ceiling and flew between the bars
and suddenly crashed into the pot, splashing hot water everywhere
and putting out the fire.  The jailhouse turned dark.
     "Ah, stupid bat!!"  This was the last thing Luanma needed
now.  "Great, what worse can go wrong," and Luanma went quiet as
he realized that there was something else making noise in the
jail.  He was not alone in the jailhouse.  He could hear someone
else breathing heavily.  It was getting louder.  Luanma began to
shuffle backwards, unsure and scared but before he could retreat
further, something grabbed his leg and pulled him back to the
wooden bars.  Luanma was so weak and scared, he couldn't even
scream.  He flinched when a hand appeared in front of him and
covered his face and Luanma held his breathe.  The hand did
nothing else except feel around his face and then it retreated. 
Luanma finally breathed deeply and then stopped again when a
strange low voice questioningly said, "L-Luanma?"
     Suddenly strength returned to Luanma and an even greater
fear made him scramble to the back of his cage.  "No," he said. 
"NO!"
     "Luanma!!  Its me!!  Its me, Mousse!!"
     Luanma shut his eyes and demanded that the dream be over. 
"No, leave me alone!!  You're not here!!  You're not HERE!!"
     Again that soft voice, "Luanma, I've looked for so long!! 
And here you are, in some jail?  Come back to China with me." 
The voice broke a little at the end.
     Silence.
     Finally Luanma spoke.  "What happened?"
     A pause, then a reply.  "Jusenkyo."
     "What you do?  Walk in?"
     "Yes."
     Harsh laughter.  Then Luanma spoke again.  "You're an idiot. 
Go away."
     "I can't.  I refuse.  You ran away before and now I have you
caged."
     "Then give me some water."
     "Here."
     Luanma could barely see a faint outline of a gourd and a
white hand.  He slowly reached out and grabbed the gourd and
opened it and began to gulp down the water.  "Where did the gourd
come from?"
     "I brought it."
     "As a bat?"
     "Luanma... you know I did it.  Its why I'm fully clothed
right now.  Its why I can give you a gourd full of water.  Its
why I'm...I'm blind.  The old man told the truth."
     More harsh laughter.  "Yeah, I was there, remember?  And you
were dumb enough to listen to that old fool.  "Sacrifice your
eyes and gain power."  And you fell for it.  I guess it doesn't
matter though, your eyes stank anyway."
     "Does that matter, I can still see the one I love."
     "The one you love isn't here."
     Silence.
     Suddenly Luanma felt cold water splashing across him and
Mousse's hand suddenly dragging her forward and felt something
wet, warm and moist connect with her lips.
     Silence.
     Luanma scrambled as far back as she could go and sat there
shivering.  "Go AWAY!"
     "I remember when I thought you were just a beautiful girl
and I could only see you clearly when you were up close.  How
wonderful I thought you were.  And the night before I lost my
weak eyes, you gave me my wish.  A kiss..."
     "and then I turned myself into a man before you and left." 
Luanma laughed harshly again.
     Silence.
     Then Luanma could hear frightening thuds and clashes and
horrible sounds.  And as suddenly, it stopped.  After a second,
Luanma realized that it was Mousse, attacking the bars and
sobbing in pain.
     "I can't reach you," said Mousse quietly when he was
finished.
     "I don't want you to," said Luanma just as quietly.
     "What use were my eyes!!"  Mousse yelled so loud and
suddenly that Luanma jerked and banged her head against the wall. 
"I could not see the truth!!  What use was my fortune!?  What use
were my servants!?  What use was anything if I could not see it!? 
My old master... saw that I was finally ready for the last step. 
Indeed, you were what persuaded me toward that final step."  At
this Mousse began to shake the bars and moan so miserably that
Luanma held her ears tightly shut.
     Mousse stopped shaking the bars and stood there, panting in
the dark.
     "And you know the ugly truth.  So why are you here?  Leave
me alone."  Luanma hugged herself.
     Mousse sighed and then said, "Why?  Why did you turn into a
man, Luanma?  The wild girl whom I found nearly dead on my door?
Where is she?   The one I lived a year with in perfect happiness? 
Was it all fake?  Are you even human?"
     "No."
     Silence.
     "I don't care," came Mousse's voice from the dark.
     "What!?"
     "I came all the way here, to Re-Ben, to find you.  And I
have.  I want my Luanma back.  Please, come back with me."
     Torchlight streamed through the window and Luanma could hear
light footsteps approaching the jailhouse.
     "No," said Luanma.  "No."  Then Luanma splashed the water
toward the front of her cell and could hear Mousse's surprise and
then a squeak and the soft flutter of tiny wings and then felt a
slight wind as something flew by her and out the window.


     "Hm... no guard.  That's strange," thought Akane as she
walked into the dark jailhouse.  The torch she carried easily lit
the entire small building and she saw a figure lying in one of
the cells.  She walked closer.
     The figure hid its face when Akane got close enough to
brightly light the cell.
     "Oh, you're a girl again!  Show your face, Luanma.  I know
its you."
     Luanma lifted her face and glowered at Akane.  "What you
want?"
     "Tell me.  Tell me how you changed into a man!"
     "What!?"  Luanma was shocked at first, then she smiled and
said, "Well, what you do for me?"
     "Father doesn't necessarily have to know anything..."
     "Hot water."
     "Huh?"
     "Hot water how I change into man."
     "No, tell me how I can change into a man."
     "Ah-ah.  That a secret.  Open door and one day I can take
you to magical water that change you into a man."
     "Really?"
     "Really."

     Akane seemed to think this over then said, "What about those
monsters?"
     "What about monsters?"
     "What do you have to do with them?"
     "I do know nothing about them."
     "So why did they attack when you were here?"
     "I do know nothing!  I have nothing to do with them."
     "You swear?"
     "I swear."
     "OK."  Akane pulled out a key and opened the cell door. 
"Well, come on!"  Akane waited impatiently.
     Luanma just lay there.
     "Well!?"
     "I can no move!!"  Luanma looked like she was going to add
something else but then just turned away.  "You help me," she
said after a bit.
     "Oh, all right," said Akane and she slowly walked in,
holding the torch in front of her, as if Luanma was going to
suddenly jump up and attack her.  When she got closer, she
realized how weak Luanma looked, despite her strong voice, and
Akane could feel something change within and when she spoke next,
it was not as cold and to the point.  Something else added to
that and that was the clean paths on Luanma's dirty face that
were left behind by tears.  Akane helped her up and together they
were soon stumbling towards the Tendo main hall together.
     "Don't tell anyone," they both said to each other and then
smiled.
     Luanma then turned serious and said, "Remember, you found me
behind house, OK?  Chinese guy escaped prison and you know
nothing, OK?"  Akane nodded.  "Hao," said Luanma.
     "Are we going tomorrow?"  Akane looked at Luanma.
     "Go where?"
     "To the magical water."
     "No."
     "Why not," said Akane, stopping and looking down at Luanma.
     Luanma turned her face away and breathed deeply and then
smiled, wiped it off her face, and turned around and said
seriously, "Only during certain mysterious time can you use it
and find it.  So we no leave until that time."  Luanma looked so
serious when she said this that Akane couldn't help but nod in
agreement.  Luanma continued, "I tell you when, but it no be for
long time.  Until then, I stay with you and your father."
     Akane nodded again.  She wanted that magical water so bad,
she was willing to agree to do and believe anything.
     They reached the Tendo main hall.

     "BA-BA!!"  Luanma ran into the stable where they had her
father all tied up.
     The panda moaned and snorted and as soon as Luanma untied
it, it knocked her over and began to lick her face.  "Ba-Ba!! 
Stop it!"  Luanma laughed and pushed the giant panda away.
     Akane had explained everything to her father and didn't
react strangely at all when word arrived that the prisoner had
escaped.  Luanma and her panda were given a new room.
     Luanma entered the room and found all her belongings in it
except for the umbrella, but this hardly bothered her.  She was
tired and actually happy.  A second chance has reared its head
and this time, Luanma was going to catch it.  All thoughts of her
visitor and her unhappiness disappeared in the brightness of a
hope of a new future.  The feelings have at last been submerged
and Luanma found herself breathing normally again.  Rolling out
the futon, she covered herself in a blanket and promptly fell
asleep, digging her feet into the thick warm fur of the panda.
     Outside the door, Ryouga stood.  When he heard her light
snoring he peeked in and smiled sadly.  He had found his heart
soaring when he heard that she was found and immediately had
Sansuke put all her stuff in her new room.  Except for the
umbrella.  He wanted to give it to her personally.  All the way
down the hall, he followed her, trying to gather up the courage
needed to present it to her, but had failed.  Then he had hoped
that she would notice it missing from her belongings and would
step back outside and discover him there.  But she had not done
that either.  Shaking his head, Ryouga laid the umbrella against
his shoulder again and walked back down the hall towards his
room.  After a while, Ryouga realized that he no longer knew
where he was again, but didn't mind.  His mind was cluttered with
various images of the strange Chinese man and the strange Chinese
girl.  One, he knew that an inevitable confrontation with would
change his life and the other, he hoped would someday be his
life.
     Eventually Ryouga began to randomly open doors.  It was so
late that most of the servants were asleep.  He opened one and
closed it immediately.  He had instantly recognized the curtains
belonging to Tendo Kasumi, who lay lightly sleeping behind them,
covered from all eyes.  Which meant that his lady, Akane-san, was
sleeping nearby and Ryouga was suddenly hit with an overwhelming
shame.  The many times that he and Akane-san had talked together. 
The many dreams he had had of her.  All this he brought back up
and tried his best to cover over the images of the China girl. 
Eventually Ryouga found his way to his room and after much
tossing, finally fell into an uneasy sleep.


     And travelling the main roads out of Ise Taira and towards
the Tendo Estate was a large body of a hundred warriors, all atop
of horses.  Leading this vast body stood a white stallion ridden
by a tall handsome man dressed in flowing rich battle garments
that lay over his impressive yodai.  At the moment, they were not
moving and their leader seemed to be waiting for something. 
Something, or more appropriately, someone arrived.
     "Yes?"  The leader hardly looked at the new arrival.
     "The Tendo Estate is still standing, Kuno-sama."
     "Oh, good!!  Off we go!!  Hi-YA!!"  With that, Kuno hit his
stallion into a gallop, leaving his men to scramble and hurry to
catch up.

     And up north travelled a lone woman, using a long bamboo
pole to support her.  The dirt around her was all torn up and
here and there were easily identified marks of horses and men. 
The woman walked on and then stopped.  All around her were the
dead bodies of men.  Barbarians, evident from the myriad of
different rusted armor they wore and the darkness of their skin
and hairy bodies.  "I'm getting closer," said the woman tiredly
and then went quiet and stopped.  Danger.
     Four ugly heads peeked out from the top of a dune to the
woman's right side.  All the barbarians were not dead.  The four
talked loudly in a language the woman did not understand.  For
the thousandth time that day, the woman wondered why she left her
grande city back in China and then held her staff up in warning. 
The four said something obviously lewd and ran up to surround
her.  One in front, one in back, one to her left, and one was
supposed to be to her right, but he was intercepted by the staff,
that shot out from the woman's hand, bounced off his forehead and
returned back to the woman's hand.  The remaining three were
shocked and the woman took advantage of this.  And now only the
ones to her left and front stood shivering in fright.
     They were barbarians, raised in the cold and harsh
conditions of the northern mountains.  They have seen
and done all horrible things and have survived all horrible
things done to them.  All of their particular clan had just been
wiped out an hour ago and after this the remaining four weren't
even shocked.  Instead, they calmly began to loot their dead
brothers and then took cover when they saw the lone person
heading their way.  A lone girl, perfect for the moral of four
lonely barbarians.  But now, there was only two.  Moral had hit
bottom.
     The woman held her finger out to the both of them and
motioned them toward her.
     Looking at each other nervously, they nodded and slowly
approached her and stopped a safe distance away from her. 
Suddenly she stepped forward and smacked both on the head lightly
with her staff.  Wincing, they stumbled back, rubbing their head,
quickly looking at their recently dead companions.
     The woman pointed at herself and said slowly,
"Coooo...loooogne."  Then pointed at the barbarian to her left
and said, "Ee-Ben-Ren," then pointed to her right and said,
"Er-Ben-Ren."  Smiling, she walked past them continuing on her
way. The two barbarians looked at each other confused, unsure how
to react.  The woman turned around to them and said, "Eebenren,
Erbenren, LAI!!  Lai-lai!!" waving for them to follow her.  The
two barbarians shrugged their shoulders and followed her.

     Out of sight to the west of her, lay a giant army setting
camp.  In the middle of this vast array of warriors and horses
stood a humongous tent of silk the color of gold.  In this tent
sat a strange and exotic woman being waited upon by two other
women, who were at the moment feeding her as she sat on luxious
cushions.  Upon first sight of this woman, one would instantly
notice her strange cat-like golden eyes, and then the strange
colors of her hair, gold and blue.  Only after recognizing the
strange beauty of this woman, does one then recognize that she is
clearly pregnant.  At the moment, something seemed to be
bothering this royal female and she was upset visibly, eyebrows
slanted downward, eyes slimming then staring widely at the air in
front of her, and her lips were in a constant frown, once in 
while pulling back revealing straight white teeth, and the two
teeth to the sides of her most front top teeth were pointy and
sharp, like those of a wolf.
     "Wang Herb."  A mild voice called clearly from outside.
     The face brightened and the woman said in a low feminine
voice, "Cai-Yung!!  Come in!"  The gloom that surrounded her
seemed lifted as a thin, muscular man, dressed in blue silks,
entered the room.  His eyes were bright blue and matched his
dress, and had straight black long hair, which cascaded down
around his beautiful elegant face.
     "Your highness," said Cai-Yung as he bowed.
     "Old friend..." Herb smiled at Cai, "any news as of yet?"
     "I'm afraid not."  Cai-Yung seemed intent on keeping his
head to the floor.  "It is not here.  We will have to head
south."
     Herb sighed and closed her eyes then waved at the women
tending her to leave.  She waited until they had closed the tent
door behind them before letting the tears drop.  Cai kept his
head to the floor, well aware of the stifled sobs, but knew that
as much as Herb needed his presence, she didn't need his eyes. 
So Cai stayed bowed, head to the cold floor, and waited.

     Hiroshi woke with a start.  Something had hit him on the
head.  He started again as a little pebble bounced off his head. 
He turned to his window, which lay open and a shadowed figure
waved at him.  Hiroshi got out of bed and walked a little closer
and then recognized who it was.  "Hey!!  Its you!!  Did you know
I'm getting punished harshly tomorrow for not watching you?"
     "Ah!  I'm sorry about that.  Listen, you said you wanted to
learn from me," said the man with the long bound hair.
     "Yes!!"  Hiroshi nearly jumped in happiness.
     "Good, then follow me."
     Hiroshi climbed out his window and closed it behind him,
then followed quickly after the man, who didn't make a sound as
he seemed to glide across the ground.  Quietly they walked
through the building, avoiding the night guards, and somehow they
had reached the outside.  Hiroshi didn't quite see when they had
reached the walls and how they had gone through, but he was too
excited to care.  At last, they reached the outskirts of the
nearby woods and the man turned to him and smiled.
     "Hiroshi, do you admire me?"
     "Yes," said Hiroshi, bobbing his head up and down.
     "Would you like to become powerful?"
     "Yes," said Hiroshi, this time nodding his head once.
     "Will you accept me as your master," said the man, his eyes
glowing.
     "Yes," said Hiroshi inaudibly, his body still.
     "Then listen as I tell you my brothers' horrible tale," said
the man, his pig-tail unraveling as he grew taller and more
muscular.
     Hiroshi was covered in shadows as monsters appeared around
him as he listened to the hypnotic voice of the tall dark man.

     And across the sea to the East, across many mountains and
deserts, stood a ruin castle amidst a ruin city.  Inside sat a
man on a tall golden throne in a large wide room.  Giant holes in
the walls let in just enough moonlight to see the outline of
ruined furniture.  His eyes were closed, yet he could clearly see
the boy, whose eyes were wide open, mouthing the word "yes" over
and over again lying still on his bed staring at the ceiling. 
"Good" said the man and watched as Hiroshi closed his eyes and
went back to sleep.  The man slumped over on the throne but then
stubbornly pulled himself back up.  He breathed heavily and
stared around the dark, ruined room, and smelled the putrid scent
of decaying bodies.  "Soon," he said and smiled as he leaned back
against the throne and fell into a deep contented sleep.

Notes on Mandarin:

Lai - come
Ee - one
Er - two
Ben - stupid
ren - person
Hao - Good; OK
Wang - King

blahblahblah (a.k.a. author's notes):  Well, finally I wrote the
second chapter to this amazingly fun, fantastic, great,
intelligent, stupendous, superb fanfic that everybody is going to
like and love and write long praising replies back to me saying
what a great writer I am and all that (hinthint).  Actually, this
fic, like most of my writing, forms as I write.  The plot is like
spam, taken from various things and slapped together, unsure
exactly how its going to turn out.  In other words, my brain is
doo-doo.  I sort of know how I want this thing to eventually turn
out and also know how I want every character to interact. 
However, I can spend pages on interaction alone and not have the
story move anywhere, which would be pointless and boring, no? 
Well, hopefully the next chapter ain't going to be as bad.  Oh,
as you noticed, there is a character named Cologne in this
chapter, however, that is obviously not the same Cologne of
Ranma1/2 that we all hate and loath and can shrink your manhood
merely looking at her.  This is sort of a young Cologne, who was
supposed to be very beautiful when she was young in Ranma1/2,
both manga and anime.  At first, I was going to use Shampoo, but
Shampoo isn't very intelligent and responsive, I needed someone
who was going to react well to new and alien surroundings and who
was also tough as all hell.  Also, I couldn't help but put in my
own character who also made an appearance in the Split
Personality side-story about Lili Hu.  I've gotten many questions
asking about Genma and what his problem is.  Patience and you
will see.  Have I not kept most of the characters true to their
nature?  Have I not kept most of the relationships between
characters pretty much true to the original (I hope)?  Soun and
Genma are friends, no?  This will works its way into the fic, as
you will find out, and I think it will work nicely.  And what's
up with Mousse?  Well, he's always obsessed with one girl, so I
just sort of centered it on Luanma and I've always wanted to
write about a blind-master.  But what about Shampoo?  Oh, she'll
come along as do all the major characters in Ranma1/2, such as
Ukyou... (more hinthint).  Oh well, I'm blabbing, see y'all
around, over, under, in or on the net.  It's 1996!!

Thanks go to:  Kristin Lauren Huntsman who has yet to find adequate net 
access.  John D. Great: old man and all over good guy.  Wendy K. 
Grunseich: My better half.  White Wolf: Whose fur will someday be my 
welcoming mat.  Xavier: for hating my fanfics.  Grouchy Bear: for keeping 
us in line over at the Ranma ML.  Francis Lewis: the only cool guy anyone 
can find in Europe.  And of course, I thank my overwhelming ego and 
incredible talent.

People I wish would go shut up and die:  Everybody else, including a 
certain someone by the name of Thomas E. Reed over on AOL.