Reply-To: DS5877@alf.appstate.edu
Okay, this is an incomplete draft of the fanfic I'm working on. This
represents about the first quarter of what will be the finished work.
If you were here a month or so ago, you probably saw a fair bit of this
already but I went back and tweaked many of the scenes here and there
to try to make the characters more realistic (Ranma was just too nice
in my earlier draft).
Anyway, any feedback you can give me is very welcome.
/= Ranma * Chacha * Futaba * DNA^2 * Greenwood * VGAi =\
" Dov "Dobu" Sherman "
| DS5877@Alf.Appstate.Edu |
` Visit the Futaba-kun Change Homepage at `
" http://www.acs.appstate.edu/~ds5877/fkc.html "
\= Tenchi * Ikkoku * VGAi * Tyler * Dragon/2 * Sailor Moon =/
Ranma 1/2 Elseworlds: "Bokken-Hearted"
* * *
Soun Tendou clutched the postcard in his hands and wept with joy. "At last!"
he cried. "Ranma is coming! And soon, in only a few weeks, Ranma will be
here!"
He turned the postcard over and read again the barely legible scrawlings of
his good friend Genma:
Training with Ranma. Will be in China a
little longer. Will reach Qinghai province
in one week. Returning to Japan after.
Genma
It was good of Genma to give him fair warning before arriving. While honor
dictated that both Genma and Soun abide by the promise they had shared over a
bottle of sake, Soun realized it would take a little while to explain this to
his daughters. Sniffling loudly and stifling his tears, he readied himself to
break the wonderful news to them. The families of Tendou and Saotome would be
united when one of his daughters married Ranma.
Soon, Soun had gathered Kasumi, Nabiki, and Akane in the living room. Kasumi
still wore her apron as she had been preparing dinner. Nabiki was dressed
casually in a blue sweater bearing the word "ON". And Akane, of course, wore
her gi, lightly sprinkled with the powdered remains of the concrete blocks
she'd been practicing with in the dojo.
"Engagement?!" Nabiki asked. "You can't be serious."
"Yeah, Dad. That stuff went out years ago," Akane protested.
"Oh my," Kasumi said.
"He's the son of a very good friend of mine," Soun said. "We made this
promise many years ago when we trained together."
"What kind of boy is he?" Kasumi asked.
"Is he cute?" Nabiki grinned.
"I really don't like this idea," Akane grumbled.
"I hope he's not younger than me," Kasumi added. "Younger men are so...
young."
"Yeah, what's this Ranma like?", insisted Nabiki.
"I don't know," Soun admitted.
"You don't know?" Nabiki frowned.
"I've never met him."
"Oh this is just great!" Akane blurted. "You've engaged one of us to some boy
you've never even met and whose father you haven't seen in who knows how long.
For all you know this Ranma could be some kind of cross-dressing, pervert
playboy!"
"Now, now, Akane," Kasumi soothed. "It's not nice to say such things about
someone you've never met."
"Yeah," Nabiki mused. "Who knows? He might be really cute."
"I don't care if he's cute! I really don't have time for boys right now
anyway," Akane said. "If he's getting engaged to one of us, it's definitely
NOT going to be me!"
"Maybe you should wait until you meet him," Nabiki suggested. "Anyway, he
won't be here for a few weeks so why worry about it now?"
"Okay, fine. Can we just drop it for now?" Akane crossed her arms
petulantly. "We'll worry about it when he gets here. Until then, nobody says
anything about it to anyone, okay?"
* * *
In school the next day...
"Engagement?!" Kunou blurted.
"Yeah," Nabiki said. "My daddy and his daddy decided. One of us is going to
be engaged to this Ranma Saotome when he shows up but it hasn't been decided
which one of us it will be."
"But, if the one chosen were my beauteous Akane... NOOOOOO!!!!!!" Kunou
slammed his fists angrily on his desk. "I shall not allow such an
unfortuitous happenstance to occur!"
"Well, there's not much you can do about it now, Kunou-chan. They're still in
China. Ranma won't be here for at least two or three weeks."
"In China, did you say? If this so-called Ranma Saotome thinks he can evade
the wrath of the great Tatewaki Kunou simply by hiding in China, methinks he
thinks wrongly indeed!"
"Kunou-chan, I'm sure he's never in even heard of you so it's not very likely
that he's hiding. Ranma's on a martial arts training expedition with his
father. They're going to the Qinghai province before coming back to Japan."
"The Qinghai province?" Kunou mused. So, Ranma Saotome was training in the
Qinghai province. It would be a simple task to find the scalawag and show him
the folly of threatening the eternal love betwixt Kunou and Akane. "If you
will excuse me, then." Kunou rose from his desk and turned to the door.
"Kunou!" The teacher shouted as he bounced a chalkboard eraser off Kunou's
head. "Where do you think you're going?!"
Kunou sat down again. "My apologies, sensei." He turned to Nabiki. "After
class, then. The wretch has won himself a half hour's reprieve. But when
this class has ended..."
* * *
One week later...
"Here, sirs, we come to Training Ground of Cursed Springs, Jusenkyou."
Ranma looked around and smirked. "Ah, this place ain't near as bad as I
thought it'd be."
"Oh, sir, you very strange one, no? This very dangerous place. Nobody use
now because more than one hundred spring here and each one have own tragedy
happen there."
"Ready, Ranma? Follow me!" Genma leapt high into the air to land on the tip
of a bamboo pole sticking out of a spring.
Ranma leapt toward another pole. "Right behind ya, Pop!"
The Chinese guide gasped. "AH! Sirs! What you doing?! I not finished my
tragic story!"
"I won't go easy on you, Ranma!" Genma warned.
"That's just the way I like it!" Ranma replied.
"Wait, sirs! Very bad you fall in spring!"
Genma and Ranma leapt at each other, exchanged blows, and landed nimbly atop
different poles.
The Chinese guide winced. "Sirs! You not know what you doing!"
The Saotomes leapt at each other again. Genma swept his leg low but Ranma
pulled himself up and planted his foot squarely into his father's face. Genma
sailed backward and disappeared below the surface of a spring with a splash.
Ranma landed on a pole. "Gotcha." Ranma looked down at the spring his father
had fallen into. The surface of the spring bubbled but there was no sign of
his father yet. "Hey, Pop! What's up? Are we done already?"
With a roar, a huge panda broke the surface of the water and flew into the air
to land on a bamboo pole. It assumed a fighting stance, facing Ranma.
"YOW! Wha... WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!!"
"That one Shonmaonichuan, Spring of Drowned Panda. Very tragic legend of
panda who drown there two thousand year ago. Now, whoever fall in spring take
body of panda."
"What?!" Ranma blurted. "You never said anything about that!"
Behind the guide, Kunou staggered up the track to the training grounds, his
bokken clutched tightly in his hands. "At last, Saotome. Kunou has found
you."
Genma, oblivious to his ursine transformation, launched himself at Ranma.
"Hey!" Ranma leapt over the panda to land on another pole.
Kunou charged toward them, pushing the guide aside. "Out of my way, peasant!"
It had taken him days to track down Ranma Saotome. Oddly, no one had made any
mention of this panda but Kunou would not allow himself to be distracted in
his quest by such triflings. "Ranma Saotome! PREPARE TO DIE!!!"
Ranma blinked in surprise at the stranger running toward them. "Who the hell
are you?!"
Kunou leapt into the air, sweeping his bokken in mighty arc.
Genma leapt toward Ranma.
Ranma, surprised by Kunou's mysterious appearance, leapt to the side.
Genma, seeing Ranma dodge, rebounded from the pole Ranma had been standing on.
Kunou, seeing the panda in his way, swung his bokken to remove the pest from
blocking the path of righteousness.
Genma noticed Kunou for the first time and swatted him out the air with a paw,
then kicked another paw toward Ranma, hitting him squarely in the chest.
Kunou and Ranma splashed down in different springs and Genma executed a
perfect double somersault to land lightly on a bamboo pole.
* * *
One week later still...
"I have told you! I want no part of this! Now put me down!"
Soun's head snapped up at the sound of the voice coming from the foyer. Nabiki
dropped the manga she'd been reading. "Ooooo! It must be Ranma!"
Soun and Nabiki sprinted down the hallway. "Saotome! My friend! We've been
waiting!"
Kasumi stepped out of the kitchen as Soun and Nabiki ran past. She smoothed
her immaculate apron. "Oh my, do we have company?"
Akane poked her head out of the kitchen, flicking a suckered and slightly
luminous tentacle from her sleeve. "What's going on? Are they here?"
Kasumi and Akane peered down the hallway expectantly. Soun and Nabiki
disappeared around the corner. "Saotome-kun! My frie--- WAAAAARRRRGGHH!!!"
Soun and Nabiki tore back down the hallway to join Akane and Kasumi. They
were overtaken by a small boy and joined by a huge panda carrying someone over
its shoulder. The person in the panda's grasp squirmed and shouted, "Come on!
You're scaring them! Now put me down!"
"So, Daddy," Nabiki began. "This is your friend?"
Soun shook his head fervently, sweat beading on his brow, tears of panic
welling in his eyes.
"Oh, so this panda just decided to drop in, huh?"
The panda set down the person it'd been carrying who stared embarrassed at the
floor, her wavy red bangs shielding her eyes.
Soun peered at the red-head. "You wouldn't be...?"
The red-headed girl shuffled her feet and fumbled with the belt holding
together her loose-fitting clothes. "Well, uh..."
Nabiki peered at the visitor. "Ooooo... he IS cute."
Soun grasped her by the shoulders. "Ranma! At last, you've come!" He threw
his arms around her and started to cry. Soun paused, thought about the feel
of the body he held, then, a look of panic on his face, held her back at arm's
length.
Nabiki stepped up beside her father and extended a finger. She poked the girl
in the chest, experimentally. "Hmmm...." With the palm of her hand she felt
the visitor's chest. Definitely a B cup, at the least. It would probably be
a C by the end of the series.
The girl blushed and mumbled, "Er... could you please not do that?"
Nabiki looked back at her father. "Ranma's not a boy. He's a girl!"
"A... a girl?!" Soun gasped.
The girl waved her hands. "No, wait! Hold! I'm not! I mean, I'm not
Ranma!"
Soun, on the edge of fainting, blinked in surprise. "Oh! Oh, thank heaven!"
"Wow," Akane added. "For a minute there I thought... Never mind. It was too
ridiculous to even consider."
"Yes," the girl said. "They just, uh, asked me along to clear things up."
Pointing a finger past Soun, she said, "THAT's Ranma."
Soun turned to look. There was no one behind him but Akane and Kasumi. Then
he looked down a little lower and noticed a small boy, possibly five years
old, peering from behind Kasumi. With a loud wail, Soun fainted dead away.
Ranma 1/2 Elseworlds #?:
"Bokken-Hearted"
or
"Ranma 1/2-Pint"
*
Story by Dov Sherman
Ranma Elseworlds Discontinuum
and Robes-stuff
by John Walter Biles
Ranma 1/2, characters, places, and related stuff
by Rumiko Takahashi
The Tendou sisters sat by Soun's futon as he slowly regained consciousness.
"Poor Father," Kasumi said. "He's so disappointed."
"He's disappointed?" Nabiki asked. "He's not the only one! Some fiance!"
"I assumed my friend Genma's son was much older," defended Soun. "They've
been on the training trip for so long!"
"Look at him!" Nabiki pointed to the little boy playing with the panda in a
corner of the room. "He couldn't be more than five years old!"
"I don't understand," Soun protested. "Genma and his son have been training
for at least ten years! Am I misremembering? Where's the girl who came with
them? Maybe she can explain."
"I was going to invite her to stay for dinner but she left just after you
fainted, Father," Kasumi said. "Who was she?"
"Whoever she was, she explained just fine, Daddy," barked Nabiki. "You've
promised to engage one of us to a five-year-old boy! You can't really expect
us to take that brat seriously?!"
"Oh, listen to you," Akane said. "Stop picking on Ranma-chan. It's not his
fault." She turned to the little boy and smiled. "Ranma-chan, come with me.
We can play outside while the grown-ups talk. Would you like that?"
Ranma hid shyly behind the panda. Akane crouched beside him, holding out her
hand. "I'm Akane. You want to be friends?" Ranma slid around further behind
the panda. "I can probably find some cookies or juice for you if you're
hungry." Shyly, the little boy took her hand and smiled.
* * *
Ranma sat beside Akane on the porch, eating a cookie and swinging his legs.
"You like the cookie, Ranma-chan? Kasumi made it."
"Yeah, it's real good. Thank you, Akane-oneechan!"
Akane looked out over the yard and the pond. "I guess you'll be staying with
us for a while until Daddy sorts this out. But, don't worry, you'll like it
here. And don't mind my sisters. Nabiki's a little mad right now but Kasumi
is very nice. I'm sure you'll like them."
"I like you, Akane-oneechan!"
"Thank you, Ranma-chan! That's very sweet. It's too bad I'm so old, though,"
Akane said teasingly.
"That's okay, you're real pretty, anyway."
"Oh? You want me to be your fiancee, Ranma-chan?" teased Akane.
Ranma furrowed his little brow in consideration for a moment. "Do I get more
cookies?"
Akane laughed. "I think you've had enough. You'll spoil your dinner."
"But I want another cookie!"
"Oh, do you?" Akane smiled. She reached over and gave him a little tickle.
Ranma giggled and pushed her away. Akane laughed and made a grab for him.
Ranma leapt into the air, flipped over Akane's head, and grabbed her in a hug
from behind. Akane blinked in surprise and laughed. "Wow! You're pretty
good for such a little boy. I'm just glad you're not my age. Boys my age are
so stupid. I can't stand older boys." She turned around and hugged little
Ranma. "But you're a very sweet little boy, aren't you, Ranma-chan?"
* * *
"But I don't wanna take a bath!"
"Now, now, Ranma-chan," Kasumi chided. "You've been playing outside all
afternoon and you have to take your bath now."
Akane helped Kasumi pull him down the hall. "Now, don't be such a crybaby,
Ranma-chan. Kasumi-oneechan will help you with your bath. Won't that be
nice? And I'll be just upstairs in my room."
"But I don't wanna, I don't wanna, I don't wanna! No! No! No! No!"
Akane sighed and dragged the little boy down the hall to the bathroom. So much
fuss over a bath! As they passed the living room, she noticed her father
sitting with an unfamiliar man who was wearing a martial arts gi and glasses.
"Kasumi, who's that man with Daddy?"
"Who knows?" Kasumi shrugged.
When they had finally gotten Ranma into the bathroom, Kasumi said, "Thank you,
Akane-chan. You can go on up to your room and finish your homework. I'll
call you down when we're finished so you can take your bath. I can handle
little Ranma-chan from here."
"I don't want a bath!" Ranma wailed.
"Are you sure you can handle him, Kasumi-oneechan? He's a real handful."
"Don't worry. I'll be fine. You were pretty difficult at his age, too."
Akane laughed and went up to her room. As she worked on her homework, she
thought about Ranma. He really was a sweet little boy. It was strange but it
would be nice to have a kid around the house. Everyone else took things so
seriously. And little Ranma-chan really was very sweet. `I like you,
Akane-oneechan!' Akane smiled as she thought of little Ranma's innocent face
and kept smiling right up until she heard Kasumi's scream.
* * *
Meanwhile, at the Kunou Residence...
Carefully, Sasuke crept across the lawn, darting quickly from shadow to
shadow, his keen ninja senses alert for movement. The yard was still and
empty but he knew that one of the newer pitfalls had captured an intruder and,
as a proud ninja servant of the Kunou family, it was his duty to check it out.
This particular pitfall was a four-meter deep circular hole filled with two
meters of water and covered by a concealed trapdoor. He'd only installed it a
few days ago and was happy to see that it was working so well. When Master
Kunou returned from his mission, Sasuke was sure he'd be pleased. Sasuke was
always eager for any chance to please his Master. Working for the Kunou
family had always been difficult. At least, when Kunou and Kodachi's mother
had still been alive, she'd managed to help to curb her children's behavior a
little but, without her influence, they did largely as they pleased. And they
were both very demanding.
Sasuke peeked over the edge of the trap and down into the hole. In the
moonlight, it was easy to make out the intruder, splashing helplessly in the
water. "So, you thought you could break into the Kunou Mansion, did you? But
you didn't count on the ninjaistic genius of myself, Sasuke, proud ninja
servant of the Kunou family!"
"SASUKE! You imbecile! Get me out of this hole immediately!"
Oh, no! Sasuke recognized the voice. "Mi... Mistress Kodachi! Please
forgive me! I thought you knew about the new traps! Stay right there while I
get a ladder." Damn, damn, damn, damn, damn! Upsetting Mistress Kodachi was
a major blunder. The last time he'd upset her, she'd more than doubled the
usual amount of poison she put in his meals. If it weren't for his ninja
poison-training, he'd have been in very real danger. As it was, it had still
been enough to cause him serious pain. She'd kept it up for three weeks!
Three weeks of sheer agony. And all because he'd tried to save a little money
by buying domestic alligator food for her pet instead of the deluxe variety
Midorigame preferred. And now he'd dropped her down a well. This was NOT
good.
Sasuke found a ladder in the maintenance shed and lowered it down to his
Mistress.
"It's about time," she called up.
Sasuke watched fearfully as Mistress Kodachi climbed up the ladder. Once out
of the pit, she stood over him shaking both with the cold air on her wet body
and the fury she didn't even try to conceal. Sasuke grovelled at her feet,
"Please forgive me, Mistress! Had I known you were not informed about the new
traps... it's my fault, I should have made sure. I am so, so sorry,
Mistress!"
"Do not call me that! I am NOT your Mistress!"
"Oh, no, Mistress! Please don't fire me! I'll do better! You'll see! Please
give me another chance! Please! And may I say that I think your new hair
color is very becoming."
"Sasuke! What is this noise?" Sasuke looked back toward the house to see
Kodachi glaring angrily at him. "To whom are you talking?"
Sasuke looked back at the red-headed Kodachi, still dripping wet, in front of
him. Two Kodachis? "Imposter!" he screamed and pushed the red-headed girl
back into the well.
"SASUKE!!!!!!!!!!!" she screamed as she splashed down.
"Ha!" Sasuke sneered. "Didn't think I'd see through such a pathetic disguise,
did you? Maybe next time you'll know better than to match wits against a
ninja of my caliber!"
The red-headed girl, doggy-paddled slowly in the water. "Sasuke..." she
growled. "The vengeance of heaven is slow but sure. For this injustice, my
wrath shall be epic!"
Sasuke stared down into the pitfall incredulously. "Ma... Master Kunou?"
* * *
"Kasumi!" Akane skidded to a halt in the bathroom and stared in shock at the
naked teenage boy sitting in the bath. Kasumi still knelt by the side of the
bath, a hand over her mouth, her eyes wide with surprise. Akane stomped over
to the side of the bath angrily. "Just who the hell are you and what are you
doing in our bath?!"
Ranma crouched against the side of the bath, blushing furiously and trying to
hide his nakedness. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I can explain!"
"It'd better be good!" Akane turned to her sister. "Kasumi, where's
Ranma-chan? Did he run out when you found this pervert in here?"
"Um," Kasumi stammered. "No, not exactly."
Nabiki, Soun, and Genma appeared in the doorway of the bathroom. Genma folded
his arms. "Hmmm... I was afraid this might happen."
"Wow, Kasumi!" Nabiki remarked. "In the bath with a naked boy? I wouldn't
have expected that from you."
"Nabiki!" Akane warned. "Knock it off! You know very well Kasumi wouldn't do
that!"
"Exactly my point," Nabiki explained.
Soun grasped his head in his hands and wailed, "Waaaaarrrrgghh!!! My little
girl is growing up too quickly! Kaaasuuuummiiii..."
"Father!"
Genma laid a hand on Soun's shoulder. "I think you might be overreacting,
Tendou-kun. Perhaps we should explain."
"And just who are you, anyway?!" Akane demanded of Genma.
"Um, excuse me?" Ranma mumbled.
Akane spun around and poked Ranma in the nose. "You stay out of this! I'll
deal with you in a minute."
"So, Kasumi," Nabiki began. "Aren't you going to introduce us to your friend
here?"
"I... I don't know," Kasumi stammered.
"Oh! My little girl.... waaaaarrrrgghh!!!"
Genma patted Soun on the back consolingly. "There, there, Tendou-kun. Let it
all out." He turned to Akane. "Your father will be fine. He's been like
that as long as I've known him. My name is Genma Saotome."
"You're Ranma's father?" Akane asked. "It's very nice to meet you. You have
a very sweet son but it looks like he ran out when Kasumi found this pervert
in the bath. My name's Akane and these are my sisters, Nabiki and Kasumi."
Genma laughed jovially. "I knew you were Soun's daughter the moment I laid
eyes on you, Akane. You've got your mother's looks, you know."
"Why, thank you!"
"Er, excuse me," Ranma hazarded.
"I said stay out of this, pervert!" Akane snarled. She turned back to Genma.
"So you knew my mother?"
"Yes," Genma nodded. "But it's been so long. I was very sad to hear that
she'd passed on. She was a very gentle woman."
Nabiki grinned. "I guess you have known Daddy a long time if you remember our
mother."
"Yes, Soun and I trained in Anything-Goes Martial Arts together under the same
master. Ha! The stories I could tell you!"
Soun, eyes red but recovering, patted Genma on the back. "That's right,
girls, Saotome-kun and I go way back."
"Well," Nabiki said as she sat on the edge of the tub. "Any friend of
Daddy's..."
Soun laughed as he sat beside Nabiki. "That's right, Nabiki! Kasumi, come
over here and meet my friend, Genma."
"Hajimemashite, Saotome-san," Kasumi said as she bowed.
"It's nice to meet you, too," Genma replied. "But, please, call me `Uncle.'"
Kasumi giggled, "Of course, Saotome-ojisan."
"Excuse me, please?" Ranma mumbled.
"Shut up already, you jerk!" Akane turned back to Genma and smiled. "I'm glad
that's cleared up. Will you be staying with us for a while, Saotome-ojisan?"
"Yes, both I and my son will be staying here. I hope we won't be too much
trouble for you."
"Oh, it won't be any trouble," Kasumi said. "You can stay in the guest room.
I've already straightened it up for you."
"Well, then," Genma said. "That was very nice of you, Kasumi."
"Excuse me..." Ranma muttered.
"Will you stop that?!" Akane yelled.
"EXCUSE ME!!!" Ranma shouted.
"Alright already! What is it?!"
Ranma huddled down in the bathtub. "Could everyone leave for a minute so I
can get dressed?! Please?"
* * *
Soun and Genma sat on either side of Ranma in the living room while the three
Tendou sisters sat facing them. They sat in awkward silence for a few moments
until Soun broke the silence, "As you know, this is my friend, Genma Saotome.
And this," he said, gesturing to Ranma, "is his son."
"Ranma Saotome," Ranma said.
"That's ridiculous!" Akane said. "We already met Ranma and he's a little
five-year-old boy."
"There's a very good explanation for that," Genma said. "Sort of. But it's
such a long story, I hardly know where to begin.... hmmm.... well, then...
let's start with this." Genma grabbed Ranma by the collar and threw him out
the back door and into the pond.
"YAAARRGGH!!!" Ranma splashed down in the pond and then resurfaced in his
little boy form. "Hey! What was that for?! You big bully!"
"Oh my," Kasumi said.
"He really is... uh..." Akane stammered.
Genma stood by the side of the pond and looked down at his little son as tears
of shame streamed down his face. "Oh, my son! How it breaks my heart to see
you like this!"
Little Ranma leapt out of the pond, landed behind his father, and then jumped
up to kick him in the back. Genma fell forward into the pond with a splash.
"Nyah! Daddy's a panda! Nyah, nyah, nyah!" he sang.
Genma growled angrily as his stood in the pond, water dripping from his fur.
"You certainly have some interesting friends, Father."
"They didn't used to be like this," Soun explained. "It was training in China
that did this to them."
After Ranma and Genma had had a quick bath, they returned to the living room
to finish their story. Genma explained how they had gone to Jusenkyou to
train. How, through no fault of his own, Genma had not realized the true
nature of the springs until it was too late and how he and his son had become
cursed in the Shonmaonichuan, Spring of the Drowned Panda, and the
Nanhaizinichuan, Spring of the Drowned Little Boy.
"And that girl who was with you earlier?" Akane asked. "Who was she? Ranma's
girlfriend?"
Ranma and Genma glanced at each other. "She, uh," Ranma blustered, "she's
just a friend. We asked her to come along and introduce us because, when
Dad's a panda, he can't talk and, when I'm a little boy, I have a little boy's
mind so we couldn't know I'd explain things right."
"A little boy's mind?" Nabiki asked. "So it's like a separate personality?"
"Not exactly," said Ranma. "Um, it's more like me when I was a little boy.
When I was five or something. I mean, it's still me."
"Well, then," Soun said. "Your problem isn't so bad, after all." He laid a
hand on Ranma's shoulder. "Look... my youngest daughter, Akane; she's
sixteen. My middle daughter, Nabiki; she's seventeen. And my oldest
daughter, Kasumi; she's nineteen. Pick any one you want, she'll be your new
fiancee."
"Kasumi would seem to be the wisest choice," Akane offered.
"I couldn't agree more!" Nabiki said.
"Oh my!" Kasumi gasped. "Me?"
"If Ranma's going to be turning into a little boy..." Akane began.
"What he really needs is a strong mother-figure," Nabiki finished.
"Me?" Kasumi blushed. "Engaged? Oh my!"
Soun laughed. "Well, that settles it, then!"
"Hold on, wait a second!" Ranma protested. "I don't got time for fiancees
right now. I'm going back to China. I have to find a way to change back for
good."
"But... but..." Soun wailed. "You just got here! You're not going to run out
on my little girl that quickly, are you?!"
"Hey! Look, I don't wanna sound mean or nothing but you can't really expect
me to just stay like this! I gotta find a cure."
"And how long will that take? A week? A month? A year? WAAAAARRRRGGHH!!"
"I don't know," Ranma answered. "But I have to try. There's gotta be a cure
somewhere."
Genma slammed a fist on the table. "Ranma! I thought I raised you to know
better than to run out on your obligations for your own selfish needs!"
"Obligations?!" Ranma spat. "You gotta be kiddin' me! This engagement thing
was your stupid idea! Don't go trying to pin this on me!"
"Ranma," Kasumi said. "I... I understand why you're doing this. I... I'm a
lot older than you are. If you don't want me, I... I'll understand."
"No! I mean, that's not it! Arrggh... okay, I'll stay for a while..."
* * *
Kodachi sat in the kitchen beside the soaking red-headed girl wrapped in a
blanket. She stared awestruck at the girl. It was amazing. Just like
looking in a mirror except for the shorter, red hair. How could this be her
brother? Such a thing was impossible! The girl was at least a foot shorter
than her brother, even if you discounted the obvious change in gender. Of
course, if the girl's claim was true, it was certainly an improvement.
Sasuke removed the kettle from the stove and began to pour the hot water into
the basin at the girl's feet. "Hold," the girl ordered. Taking the kettle
from him, she emptied its contents over her head and, by the curse of
Jusenkyou, she became Tatewaki Kunou.
Sasuke gaped as Kunou handed the kettle back to him. "Master Kunou..."
"Oh, my dear brother!" Kodachi gasped. "So it IS true!"
"Yes," Kunou admitted, his head hung low. "'Tis true."
"But, why," Kodachi asked, "do you look like me?"
"I can only humbly presume that this wretched curse causes a change in gender
only whilst retaining all other traits. Had I had the misfortune to have been
born female, thus would have been my visage. It is only natural that there
should be a similarity between my accursed form and your own appearance, dear
sister."
Sasuke nodded. "That does make sense, Master Kunou. But why red hair?"
"I have no idea." Kunou held his head in his hands and wailed dramatically.
"Waaaaarrrrgghh!!! How shameful that one such as I, a man among men, should
be cursed so hideously! I can barely endure mine own reflection. Oh, what
agony is this!"
"`Barely endure your own reflection'?" Kodachi asked archly. "But, Brother
dear, you look like me! How dare you insult me so!"
"No, no, Mistress Kodachi!" Sasuke soothed. Much of his job was taken up
simply by trying to keep the two Kunous from killing each other. "I'm sure he
didn't mean it in that way. Master Kunou's female form is very beautiful.
Though not as beautiful as you, my Mistress."
"Silence, Sasuke!" Kunou barked. "Beautiful? I? Oh, to be changed from a
mighty warrior to a weak and helpless damsel at the touch of water! How cruel
fate is! Oh, the humanity!"
"Now, now, Brother dear. I do believe that you're taking this far too hard."
"Truly, dear Sister?"
"Of course, Brother dear. You really do make such a sweet girl. Maybe you
should transfer from Fuurinkan and enroll at St.Hebereke's Academy for Girls
with me! HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO!!!"
"You wench!" Kunou yelled angrily. "How dare you mock your own brother!"
"Tut-tut, Brother dear, or perhaps that should be `Sister dear', there's no
need for such feminine hysterics."
"I shall not stand for this insolence!"
"Keep your tone, Brother. You know you're no match for me."
"Ha! Your arrogance does not become you, Kodachi. 'Tis thou who art no match
for I!"
"Please!" Sasuke intervened. "Master Kunou! Mistress Kodachi! There's no
need for this! Mistress Kodachi, Master Kunou needs our support now. Please
remember your family honor!"
"Family honor, indeed!" Kodachi sneered. "This is no family! Our late mother
is long dead and our father abandoned us years ago. Now dear Kunou here
spends his time mooning over that Akane Tendou leaving you and I to manage all
the housework! Does my dear brother ever offer even the slightest help? HA!
This? A family?! What a joke!"
"Kodachi!" Kunou growled. "You forget your place! Since our father left, I
am the master of this home. For the great Tatewaki Kunou to be reduced to
such menial tasks would be a betrayal of honor! As woman of the house, that
task must naturally fall to you."
"Oh, but, Brother dear," Kodachi countered. "I'm NOT the only woman of the
house anymore, am I?"
"I ORDER YOU TO CEASE MOCKING ME!!!"
"You're in no position to order anyone around, dear Brother." Kodachi poked
him in the chest with a finger. "From now on, YOU will be handling my share
of the housework around here."
"Preposterous!"
"In that case, maybe you'd like your peers to know about your cute little
curse? Or maybe I'll just tell that girl you like so much. What was her
name? Akane? She attends Fuurinkan High School with you, doesn't she?"
Kunou gasped. "You... you wouldn't dare!"
"Oh, wouldn't I? Just try me. You'll be front page news by tomorrow morning.
Oh, and you'll be so popular with the boys, too! You'll have so many suitors
that I'm sure your dance card will be absolutely full!"
"Oh, sweet mercy," Kunou wept. "You... you demoness! How could you do this
to your own brother?!"
"How? Very easily, Brother dear," snapped Kodachi. "Frankly, I don't care at
all if anyone finds out your little secret. But I'm sure you do. I suggest
you do as I say or I won't hesitate to share your little secret with your
schoolmates." Kodachi frowned distastefully. "You've left me to tend house
for far too long. Now it is time my dear brother tasted a little of that
burden."
Kunou slumped forward in defeat. "Very well, then, I... I will comply. For
now."
"HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO!!! I just knew you'd see things my way,
Brother dear. I'm so glad we could come to an agreement. And you'll look so
cute in your little maid's uniform!"
"Don't push it."
* * *
Early next morning...
Ranma, Nabiki, Akane, and Kasumi walked toward Fuurinkan High School, the
Tendou sisters on the sidewalk and Ranma on a fence top.
"Uh, Kasumi," Ranma said. "It's nice of you to walk me school and all but, I
mean, it's not really necessary."
"It's your first day at a new school, Ranma."
"Well, yeah, I guess so."
"Besides, I have some shopping I need to do and I'll pass by the school on the
way so it won't be any bother."
"Well, I mean, as long as it's no trouble or anything."
"Anyway," Nabiki added. "She IS your fiancee, Ranma."
"Oh, er, yeah. Um."
"No offense, Ranma," Akane said. "But I'm glad it wasn't me. I still think
this whole arranged marriage thing is a stupid idea."
Ranma shrugged as he considered this engagement business. It had come as
a real shock and he couldn't really get used to the idea right away. He
glanced over at Kasumi. She seemed cute enough. If you liked older women.
And why not? He was a mature guy, right?
Still, it was all very disorienting. He'd always figured he'd get to find
a fiancee the normal way. Meet some nice girl and just sort of hit it off or
something but, an arranged marriage?
"So, uh, Kasumi," Ranma started. "I mean, uh, you seem like a nice girl and
all that but..."
"But what, Ranma?"
"Well, I mean, isn't there anyone else you like?"
Kasumi smiled. "I don't really have much time for a social life. I guess I'm
something of a homebody. I don't really have much opportunity to meet
people."
"What about Dr.Tofu?" Akane asked.
"Dr.Tofu? Oh, he's just a friend. I meant someone I could think of as more
than that."
"Who's Dr.Tofu?" Ranma asked.
"Dr.Tofu is our family doctor," Kasumi explained. "He's a very nice man but
he's so silly sometimes."
"You might not believe it, Kasumi," Nabiki said. "But he's completely
different when you're not around."
"Oh?" Kasumi asked. "Why is that?"
"Well, can't stand around here all day chatting! I better run or I'm going to
be late!" Nabiki sprinted off down the street.
"Hey!" Ranma called after her. "Wait for us!" He leapt down from the fence
just in time to be hit in the face with a ladleful of water being spread onto
the sidewalk by an old woman. Little Ranma blinked the water out of his eyes
and then plopped down in the middle of the sidewalk. "I don't wanna go to
school! You can't make me!"
"Oh, dear," Kasumi said. "Akane, could you give me a hand with him?"
"I really should go or I'll be late, too."
"Please, Akane?"
"Oh, um, okay."
* * *
"Kasumi! What an amazing coincidence that we should meet here of all places!"
Kasumi smiled at Dr.Tofu. "Um, yes, I guess so. I really only came by to
borrow some hot water."
"Some hot water? Why of course, Kasumi!" Dr.Tofu turned around and walked
directly into a wall. "Whoops! Now where did I leave that door?" After a
few more bumblings, he managed to find the door to the kitchen.
Akane sat on a couch with little Ranma who fidgeted anxiously. "I don't wanna
go to school!"
"Don't be that way, Ranma-chan," Akane said. "There will be lots of other
children in your class for you to meet. Won't you like that?"
"No! I won't know anybody!"
Kasumi sat down on the other side of Ranma. "That's alright, Ranma. Akane
will be in your class."
"Akane-oneechan is in my class?" Ranma asked. "Can I sit beside you,
Akane-oneechan?"
"Uh, of course, Ranma-chan," Akane smiled.
"Okay," Ranma said. He hopped off the couch and took Akane's hand. "Let's
go."
"Wait, Ranma-chan," Akane said. "We still need to get you some hot water."
"Don't wanna!" Little Ranma protested. "Ranma-oniisan no baka!"
Before Akane had a chance to ask little Ranma what he'd meant, Dr.Tofu
returned with a steaming kettle. "Kasumi, here's that hot water you asked
for."
"Thank you, Dr.Tofu," Kasumi said as she accepted the tea kettle from him. She
emptied the contents over little Ranma's head, aging him eleven years in the
space of a few seconds.
"Wow!" Dr.Tofu remarked. "That's some trick! You must be a very interesting
person, Ranma."
"Tell you the truth, Doc, I wish I wasn't."
"Would the three of you like to join me for some tea?"
"We'd love to," Kasumi said. "But Akane and Ranma have to get to school.
They're already late as it is."
Dr.Tofu walked Akane, Kasumi, and Ranma to the door. "Well, it was certainly
nice meeting you, Ranma," Dr.Tofu said, patting Akane on the head. "You'll
have to come back again sometime. Are you a friend of Akane's?"
"Actually," Kasumi said. "He's my fiance."
"Fi.. fiance?"
"Yes," Kasumi explained. "Our fathers arranged it."
"Fiance?"
"Dr.Tofu? Are you alright?"
"Uh, Kasumi," Akane said. "I think we'd better get going."
"Oh," Kasumi said. "Alright. Goodbye, Dr.Tofu! Have a nice day."
Akane hurried Ranma and Kasumi out of the door and away to school. Dr.Tofu
stared dumbstruck at the open door for several minutes.
"Fiance?"
* * *
Ranma and Akane ran along the road to school, leaving Kasumi behind. The
detour to Dr.Tofu's clinic had really put them behind schedule and they didn't
want to be any later than they already were. This came as something of a
relief to Ranma since being around Kasumi was making him uncomfortable. It
might have been easier if he'd wound up engaged to one of the other Tendou
sisters but Kasumi was just so gentle. He felt so awkward when he talked to
her. Besides, he was glad to have a moment alone with Akane. He had a few
questions he wanted to ask her.
"So what was that all about at Dr.Tofu's?"
"What do you mean?" Akane said, feigning ignorance.
"You know what I mean. When Kasumi called me her... uh, fiance and all. He
looked awful. Is there something I should know?"
"I don't think it's really any of your business, Ranma."
"Hey! I'm supposed to be her fiance, right? If there's something going on
between them I think I oughta know about it."
"You're not going to let this go, are you?"
"No."
"Alright, if you must know, Dr.Tofu has been in love with Kasumi for as long
as I can remember."
"They're lovers? Then what's she doing engaged to me?"
"No. They aren't lovers. Dr.Tofu likes Kasumi but he's never told her."
"You mean she doesn't know? Oh, come on! I only just met the guy and I could
tell he liked her. You only had to see the way he started weirding out when
she showed up. It was so obvious!"
"You don't know Kasumi. She's a very innocent person, Ranma. Kasumi always
accepts things at face value. She's not stupid, just very trusting."
"Huh." Ranma ran along in silence for a moment, considering the situation.
"Well, why doesn't he just tell her he likes her? He's more her age than I
am. Wouldn't they make a better couple?"
"I don't know. Maybe he's afraid she won't love him back. I don't know why
she wouldn't. Dr.Tofu is so kind and sensitive. He's been our family doctor
ever since I was a little girl. Whenever I had a problem, he's always been
there for me."
Ranma glanced over at Akane suspiciously. "Wait a second. I thought you said
you hated boys."
Akane frowned. "Yeah, so?!"
"Well, to hear you talk, it almost sounds like you're in love with the Dr.Tofu
yourself."
"What?! That's... that's ridiculous!"
"Why not? If he's so kind and sensitive and all that stuff. Maybe you should
go out with him yourself."
"Don't be stupid. Dr.Tofu is in love with Kasumi. Not me. Besides, the last
thing I need right now is a boyfriend."
"You mean because of the guys at school?"
"What? What do you mean?"
"The way all the guys attack you every morning."
Akane skidded to a halt and grabbed Ranma by the collar. "What?! How do you
know about that?!"
"Oh, uh, I think Nabiki mentioned something about it or something."
"Well, Nabiki needs to learn to keep her big mouth shut."
"If you want my opinion..."
"I don't!"
"...I really don't think it's very fair to you."
Akane blinked. "Wh... what?"
"I... I could help you out."
Akane sighed. "Listen, Ranma. That's nice of you to say but this is my
problem. I'll deal with it in my own way, alright?"
"Are you sure? I mean, I could help you fight these guys off, you know."
"Um, that's very generous but it's not really necessary. Besides, I don't
want people to get the wrong idea about us."
"How's that? Can't a friend help out a friend?"
Akane looked into Ranma's eyes for a few moments. "You know, you're really
not all that different from your little boy form, are you?"
"Wha... what do you mean?"
"Ranma, that's a very sweet thing to say. I appreciate it. But let me handle
this on my own, okay?"
"Uh, okay. If that's what you want."
"That's what I want. I fight my own fights."
* * *
As they arrived in the schoolyard, Ranma and Akane were met by a horde of male
students dressed in various extra-curricular garb. Ranma broke off and hopped
onto the wall surrounding the schoolyard to watch. He was already late so a
few more minutes wasn't going to make much difference. Besides, once Akane
had dealt with these students, Ranma had a feeling he knew what would be
coming next.
Akane blasted her way through the amorous mob, hurling hormone-addled boys
left and right, powing, socking, and ker-splatting her way through half the
student body. Ranma watched appreciatively. Akane was pretty good for a
girl. Nowhere near as good as he was but still very good. Of course, he'd
been on a training expedition for nearly ten years so it was only natural that
he'd be better trained. Who knew? If Akane had gone on a similar expedition,
she might have been the greater skilled.
As the last body joined the heap, Akane relaxed and picked up her schoolbag.
Something suddenly flew through the air inches from her face and she snagged
it with reflexes that would make a cheetah jealous. It was a single perfect
rose. Akane groaned inwardly.
"Such a boorish lot. They sought the pleasure of your company, if they could
manage to defeat you, that is."
"Kunou..." groaned Akane.
"And now, Akane Tendou," Kunou said, drawing his bokken. "Wilt thou spar with
me?"
That was his cue. Ranma hopped down from the wall to join Akane and Kunou.
"So, Kunou-kun. At last we meet."
Kunou turned to Ranma. "Saotome-kun!"
Akane blinked at Kunou. "Do you know each other?"
"NO!" Ranma blurted. "Of course not! How could we know each other? We've
never met before in our lives! Right, Kunou-kun?"
"Uh, ah," Kunou stammered. "Yes, quite right. Where would one such as I meet
such a common man as Saotome-kun?"
"Er, exactly, Kunou-kun. Why would I hang out with an arrogant jerk, like
you, right?"
"Arrogant?! Why you... uh, I mean, yes, yes. Fate has deemed that our paths
have ne'er crossed before."
"Uh, yeah," Ranma agreed. "What he said. Total strangers. That's right.
Yeah. Um, anyway, we should get to class, right? I mean, we're all late as
it is, right? Nice meeting you, Kunou-kun. Douzo yoroshiku and all that.
Come on, Akane." Ranma grabbed Akane's hand and pulled her toward the school.
As he passed Kunou, he whispered, "Meet me at lunch. We gotta talk."
Kunou gave Ranma a brief nod. Watching them enter the school, Kunou breathed
a sigh of relief. It had been a close call. Were Akane to learn that Ranma
and himself were acquainted, Kunou's secret might also have been revealed. For
such a thing to happen would be grievous indeed. Kunou put away his bokken
and glanced around at the students who lay groaning in pain around the yard.
It would not have done to let anyone know of his secret now or ever. But it
seemed he was safe for now. Kunou sauntered toward the doors of the school,
only realizing then that he had completely forgotten to fight Akane himself.
* * *
"Class, today we have a new student joining us. His name is Ranma Saotome and
he's just returned from a journey to China so let's all be sure to give a warm
`nihao' welcome. However, that doesn't excuse the fact that both he and Akane
Tendou were late today. Go stand in the hall."
Ranma and Akane stood outside their classroom, a bucket of water in each hand.
"Oh, well," Ranma sighed. "I guess we knew this was coming."
"I wouldn't be out here if it wasn't for you, Ranma."
"Oh, come on, it's not like it's my fault."
"I wouldn't have been late if we hadn't had to stop at Dr.Tofu's to get you
some hot water."
"And you're blaming that on me? Okay, jeez, I'm sorry. Happy now? Why do
you have to be so moody all the time? Relax a little, why doncha? You don't
have to prove anything to me, you know."
Akane frowned. "Okay, okay. Forget it. It's just been a weird morning."
"You can say that again. By the way, good technique you used in the yard.
Very impressive."
"Oh, uh, thanks."
"Not as good as me, of course. But not too shabby."
"Oh, ha ha. Why don't you try me for real some time?"
"Sorry, but I don't fight girls."
"Oh, afraid of me, are you?"
"What?! Don't be stupid."
"I think you're just afraid of me. You big baby."
"HEY! Now take that back!"
"Baby! Baby! Baby! Baby! Baby!"
* * *
Morning classes ended with lunch and Ranma met Kunou on the roof of the
school. Kunou ate slowly from his bento box. Today, his lunch was a bit
simpler than his usual gourmet meal since he'd had to make it himself. It
wasn't as elaborate as Kodachi's lunches since he lacked her experience with
cooking but at least it was free of toxins. Kunou observed Ranma's lunch. It
appeared much more appetizing than his own. He considered offering to trade
lunches but decided it would be beneath his dignity, even with such a close
friend as Ranma.
"That, uh, your lunch appears quite well made, Saotome-kun."
"Yeah, Kasumi made it for me." Ranma picked distractedly at his lunch. "I
think she's taking this engagement thing really seriously."
"So, you are not engaged to the beauteous Akane Tendou?" Kunou asked.
"Nope," Ranma confirmed. "So you can stop worrying."
"Ah, sweet fortune! From the belly of despair I am raised to a great
precipice of hope!"
"Your lunch doesn't look so hot, Kunou-kun."
"No, well... it is... adequate for my needs."
Ranma took a sip from his thermos. "How did things go at your place?"
Kunou frowned. "Not well. My sister has seen fit to compel me to perform
menial chores about our mansion in exchange for her silence."
"You mean she's blackmailing you? Wow. You told me she was pretty sneaky but
blackmailing your own brother is really low."
"Hold your tongue, Saotome-kun! I will not have you speak ill of my sister."
"Hey! I was just trying to sympathize with you. Don't get all bent out of
shape!"
Kunou folded his arms. "My sister's actions may not be the most honorable but
she is still a member of the house of Kunou. Surely you can appreciate family
honor, Saotome-kun."
"So, what then? You're just gonna go along with her?"
"It's not as if I had any choice, Saotome-kun."
"That really sucks. Let me think about it some. Maybe I help you find a way
outta this without either of you having to sacrifice honor. Anyway, I still
want to talk to you about Akane."
"Yes, what is it?"
"It's this thing with all the guys attacking her every morning. I want you to
make them knock it off."
"What?! That I cannot do, Saotome-kun. To retract my declaration would do my
family dishonor. I will not sully the name of Kunou through such an act."
"But having every guy in school attack her every morning?!"
"It is a gesture of my confidence in her battle skills."
"Couldn't you just send flowers like a normal person, Kunou-kun?"
"I am no normal man, Saotome-kun."
"You said it, not me. But, look, I'm serious, get them to leave her alone."
"I shall not. And now I forced to wonder why you should take such an
interest, Ranma-kun?"
Ranma shook his head. "Kunou-kun, we're friends, right?"
"Of course, Saotome-kun. Our mutual resentment toward your father creates a
strong bond. Furthermore, you saved my life in China and Tatewaki Kunou is
not one to forget a debt of honor. Yes, we are friends."
"Well, Akane is my friend and I don't want her to get hurt."
"Nor do I but this is necessary, Saotome-kun."
"Necessary? No, it's just stupid."
"You dare call Tatewaki Kunou stupid?"
"If you act stupid, yeah, I'll call you stupid, Stupid."
"Truly you test the limits of our friendship, Saotome-kun."
"Then get them to knock it off!"
"I will not."
"Then you're stupid."
"Silence!" Kunou drew his bokken and rose to his feet. "I will not be
insulted, even by you, Saotome-kun!"
"Oh shut up, already, Kunou-chan!" Ranma splashed Kunou with the contents of
his thermos, raising Kunou's voice by half an octave.
Kunou blinked in surprise at her female body. "How... how dare you!" Kunou
dropped to her knees. "Curse this body. Now what will I do?"
"Oh stop whining, Kunou-kun. If you'd just be reasonable I wouldn't have had
to do that."
"But look at me! To be seen in public so horribly transformed..."
"Oh, it's not so bad. You're really kind of cute, actually," snickered Ranma.
"If I wasn't already engaged, I'd ask you out myself!"
"Oh, very amusing, Saotome-kun. Now, if you are quite through with your
juvenile antics, would you be so kind as to fetch the necessary hot water that
I may regain my masculine form?"
"Sure," Ranma said, rising to his feet. "Stay here. I'll be right back,
cutey."
Kunou growled inwardly as Ranma headed for the rooftop door. Ranma reached
for the doorknob just as the door opened of its own accord.
"Ranma!" Akane said. "So this is where you got to. I thought we were going
to have lunch together."
"Oh, uh, hi, Akane," Ranma said, moving around to try to block Kunou from her
view. "Sure, go on back downstairs and I'll meet you in the schoolyard in a
few minutes."
"Why don't you come with me?"
Ranma took her by the shoulders and turned her toward the stairs. "I'll be
there in second."
"Oh, okay." Akane glanced back and noticed the red-headed girl. "Oh! Hello!
I'm sorry. I... I didn't mean to interrupt anything."
"No, no, you weren't interrupting. I'll be down in a minute."
"Don't be rude, Ranma. Hi there! Nice to see you again. Ranma, aren't you
going to introduce me to your... uh... friend?"
Ranma groaned. There didn't seem to be any easy way out of this. "Yeah, uh,
okay. Uh, Akane, this is... uh... uh..."
"Hitomi," Kunou said.
"Yeah," Ranma stammered. "Hitomi. Right. Hitomi. Hitomi, meet Akane
Tendou."
Akane walked up to Kunou and bowed to her in greeting. "I'm glad I finally
got your name, Hitomi. Are you a student here, too?"
"Er," Kunou mumbled. "Yes, yes. I have just transferred here."
"Great!" Akane said. "I always like making new friends. Come on, I'll
introduce you around."
"I'm sure she'd love to, Akane," Ranma interrupted, "but Hitomi's got some
stuff she's gotta take care of right now."
"Er, yes," Kunou said. "Very urgent. Mayhap another time."
"Okay," Akane said. "Say, I'm going to be having a slumber party this
Saturday. It'd be a great way for you to meet some of the other girls."
"A... a slumber party? Why... thank you, Akane. How very generous of you to
offer. I would be most honored to attend."
"Perfect! Ranma can tell you how to get to our house."
"Uh, yeah," Ranma mumbled. "If Hitomi can make it this Saturday. She's
usually pretty busy." Ranma gave Kunou a meaningful look and added, "Isn't
that right, Hitomi-chan?"
"Nothing comes to mind, Ranma."
Ranma narrowed his eyes. "Oh, really?"
Akane headed for the stairs. "Then I'll see you on Saturday, Hitomi. Bye!"
Once Akane had gone, Ranma turned to Kunou. "Don't even think about going to
that slumber party, Kunou-kun!"
"And why not? Akane herself has invited me. It would be a most grievous
insult to fail to appear, Saotome-kun."
"Oh, of course it would!" Ranma said sarcastically. "And I'm sure you'll look
just darling in your little nightie, too!"
"It would be worth it to spend an evening with the beauteous Akane Tendou."
"You're unbelievable, Kunou-kun."
"I am simply a man in love, Saotome-kun."
"Oh, forget it! I'm gonna go get your hot water although I don't know why I
even bother doing a favor for a jerk of a friend like you, Kunou-kun."
"The sentiment is appreciated, Saotome-kun."
"Whatever." Reaching the door to the stairs, Ranma turned back to Kunou. "And
just forget about the slumber party, okay?"
"Alright," Kunou lied. "It is forgotten."
* * *
Akane and Ranma sat together under a tree in the schoolyard eating their
lunches. Ranma had already eaten most of his on the roof with Kunou so he
picked distractedly at the remaining rice.
"Um, Akane... about Hitomi. There's, uh, something maybe you oughta know..."
"It's okay, Ranma," interrupted Akane. "I already know."
"What?!" Ranma panicked. "But... but... I mean, how did you..."
"Oh, come on, Ranma," Akane said, rolling her eyes. "Anyone could see it.
It's so obvious."
"Oh, man..." If Akane already knew about Kunou's secret, there's wasn't much
he could do. Ranma knew how prideful Kunou was and how crushed he'd be if
Akane knew about his curse. Ranma and his father had tried to keep Kunou's
experience with the Nuannichuan a secret because they both worried that, if it
became public, Kunou would feel so humiliated that he'd commit seppuku.
"This... this is not good."
"Oh, don't make such a big deal out of it, Ranma."
"Don't make...? Of course, it's a big deal!"
"No, it's not, Ranma. Anyway, you're not that great at keeping a secret."
"But this was important! Oh, man, what am I gonna do?"
"Don't worry about it, Ranma. If you and Hitomi were already dating before
this engagement thing, that's your own business."
"Jeez, if Kunou finds out... er, what?"
"Ranma, this engagement was our parents' idea, not yours. You shouldn't feel
so obligated by it. It's ridiculous."
"Oh. OH! Oh, yeah! Yeah. Er, I totally agree with you, Akane."
"Good. I'm glad. Uh, what was that about Kunou?"
"Kunou? Kunou who? Oh! That guy from this morning? Er, uh, what makes you
bring him up?"
"I didn't bring him up. You did. What were saying about Kunou just now?"
"I wasn't saying anything! You, uh, must have misheard me. Anyway, I'm glad
you brought up this engagement thing. I've been wanting to ask your opinion
about it."
"Oh, okay. What is it?"
"Well, look, I don't mean any offense to your sister or nothing but, it just
feels really weird."
"What do you mean?"
"What I mean is, she's nice and all but she's so much older than me."
"That's not all that strange. Besides, it's only three years."
"But it's not just that. She's so polite and stuff. I keep worrying I'm
going to blow my nose on the wrong sleeve and offend her or something. You
see what I'm saying?"
"I guess so."
"I don't know. Maybe it would be different if she was your age. I mean, our
age."
"Like Hitomi?"
"Er, uh, yeah."
"Don't worry, Ranma. I won't tell Kasumi about you and Hitomi."
"No, no! There's nothing between me and Hitomi!"
Akane winked conspiratorially. "Exactly."
* * *
After school, Ranma headed toward the Kunou mansion. There was no way he was
going to let Kunou sneak into Akane's slumber party. It just wouldn't be
right. It might be Kunou doing the sneaking but Ranma couldn't just stand by
and let it happen when he knew what was going on. Kunou was his friend but
Akane was... also his friend. She really was a very sweet girl. But it
wasn't that. Ranma would have done this for any friend. Wouldn't he?
Kunou greeted him at the door and led him into the garden in back. The two
sat facing each other by the small pond. "Kunou-kun," Ranma began. "Hitomi
is NOT going to that slumber party. Don't even think about it."
"And why not, Saotome-kun?"
"We've been over this before, Kunou-kun. Look, I feel bad for you, I really
do. Akane's a nice girl. I can see why you like her. But you can't go
taking advantage of your... uh... situation like that. It ain't right."
"Dost mine ears deceive me or is my dear friend jealous, Saotome-kun?"
"J... jealous?! Me? Hey, you got the wrong idea there, Kunou-kun. Akane's
just a friend. Sheesh..." Ranma shook his head in frustration. "I got enough
problems just worryin' about Kasumi. I keep feeling like I took her away from
that Dr.Tofu guy or something."
"Dr.Tofu?"
"Yeah, he's this guy who's supposed to have liked Kasumi for a really long
time. On top of that, Akane somehow got it into her head that me and
`Hitomi-chan' are... uh... dating."
"Saotome-kun! You fiend! Two women at once? Is there no respecting person,
place, or time for you?!"
"BAKA! YOU'RE Hitomi-chan or did you forget that already?"
"Oh! Yes, of course I would not forget. I... WHAT?! ME?!"
"Yeah, and it's your stupid fault for starting up this whole slumber party
business in the first place!"
"Date... you? That's... that's absurd! Hear me, Saotome-kun, you shall not
mislead Akane in such a way. I have no intention of asking you out!"
Ranma rolled his eyes sardonically. "Oh, I'm sooo disappointed."
* * *
Later...
Kunou trudged disgruntled along the darkened halls of the mansion. To think
that Akane could believe that he and... and Ranma were dating! The very idea
was revolting to say the least. Kunou shook his head in disgust and opened
the door to his bedroom. Ranma stood in the center of the bedroom, his back
to Kunou.
"Saotome-kun! How do you come to be in my bedchambers?!"
Ranma turned to face him, a bouquet of roses in his arms. "Kunou-chan, I love
you."
"You... you fiend! How... how dare you mock me! I am outraged!" Kunou began
to reach for his bokken as the floor fell away beneath him. With a splash, he
landed in the large, clam-shaped bathtub filled with hot, steamy water. Kunou
thrashed to the surface, grasping desperately for the edge of the tub. With a
roar, Kodachi's pet alligator Midorigame broke the surface of the water and
lunged toward him. Kunou whimpered in terror. He reached for his bokken but
it was nowhere to be found.
The door of the bathroom flew open and Ranma leapt across the room. In
moments, Ranma and the alligator were locked in mortal combat. "Flee! Flee,
Kunou-chan, my darling! Your lover shall protect you!" Ranma and Midorigame
tumbled in the bath as Ranma tried to wrestle the beast into submission.
"Saotome! Desist! I... I can see after myself!"
As Ranma and Midorigame crashed about, the alligator's tail thrashed wildly,
landing a solid blow to Kunou's chin. Kunou spun about with the impact and
disappeared below the surface of the water.
He fought his way back to the surface to find himself in the bathtub of an
unfamiliar bathroom.
"Hitomi-chan..."
Kunou turned to see Akane kneeling beside the tub. "Hitomi-chan," Akane said.
"You have such a beautiful body. You and Ranma were made for each other."
"Akane!" Kunou protested. "There is nothing between Ranma and myself! I'm...
I'm a man!" Kunou pressed a hand against his chest in emphasis and discovered
his sudden development of breasts. Kunou blinked at her female body and
shrieked, "NOOOOOO!!!"
"Kunou-chan," said Ranma.
Kunou turned and saw Ranma in the tub with her.
"Kunou-chan," said Ranma. "I love you...."
With a start, Kunou awoke screaming. It took him a few moments to get his
bearings. He was in his bedroom, alone. It had been a dream. But what a
horrible, horrible dream. It was... horrible. He simply couldn't find the
words to describe how horrible it had been. Horrible! He realized he was
hyperventilating and fought to control himself.
Sasuke burst into the room, "Master Kunou! I heard your shout. Are you
alright?"
Kunou felt his heartbeat coming back down to normal and sighed. "Yes, good
Sasuke. I... I am fine."
But what a horrible dream! Kunou could not allow Akane to continue to labor
under such misapprehension. He would see to it that Akane knew that Ranma and
`Hitomi' were not dating. It was imperative that this misunderstanding be
resolved. And the slumber party would provide the perfect opportunity.
* * *
A few days later...
Ranma, Genma, and the Tendous sat around the breakfast table. Ranma, as
usual, gulped down his breakfast like a ravenous wolf.
"Ranma," Kasumi said. "Please try to watch your manners."
"Hmmm?" Ranma asked through a mouthful of food.
"And don't speak with your mouth full. It's not polite."
"Yeah, Ranma," Nabiki agreed. "Just because you turn into a little kid
doesn't mean you should eat like one."
"Sorry. Yeah, I, uh, sorry."
"By the way," Kasumi said. "Akane, could you stop by Dr.Tofu's on the way
home from school? I borrowed this book from him and I'd like you to return it
for me." Kasumi held up a book titled, Human_Pressure_Points.
Akane took the book from Kasumi. "Uh, sure, I guess so."
"Thank you, Akane."
* * *
After school, Akane walked to Dr.Tofu's clinic. Ranma had offered to come
along but she hadn't thought that would really be such a good idea. She'd
been meaning to visit Dr.Tofu all week but hadn't found the courage. Returning
Kasumi's book was a good enough excuse though. When she reached the clinic,
she found the front door shut and the sign on the door read, "Closed Due to
Illness." Knowing Dr.Tofu's medical skills, illness seemed pretty unlikely.
He must have been taking Kasumi's engagement pretty hard.
Akane knocked on the door. "Dr.Tofu? It's... it's Akane. Can I see you?"
She waited but there was no answer. She was about to give up and leave when
the door opened a crack. "Akane?" It was Dr.Tofu's voice but he sounded so
weak, not at all his usual amiable self.
"Dr.Tofu. Hi. May I come in?"
The door opened further and Akane stepped inside. She turned to see Dr.Tofu
close the door behind her. It was fairly dark inside the clinic. Dr.Tofu had
left the electric lights off and the only light was the diffused sunlight
coming in through the paper curtains in the windows. The air was very still
and the overall effect was very somber and depressing.
Dr.Tofu shambled to one of the couches and sat down heavily. His appearance
was shocking. His hair was greasy and Akane could tell he hadn't shaved in
several days. From the redness of his eyes and the dark circles beneath them,
it looked like he'd been crying a lot. Akane moved over to sit beside him.
"Um," she began. "Kasumi asked me to return this book." She held up the
book. "But I was hoping for an excuse to come over here. I... uh... I wanted
to see how you were holding up."
"I'm okay."
"No, you're not. You look terrible."
"Okay, you're right. I'm not okay. I just... I don't know what to do, Akane.
I always thought that... that Kasumi... I mean..."
"I know."
"What am I going to do, Akane? I love her! What am I going to do?" Dr.Tofu
buried his face in hands and began to cry.
It was frightening to see Dr.Tofu like this. He was usually so strong. Akane
couldn't even remember how many times he'd given her a shoulder to cry on over
one thing or another. But to see him like this, so broken, so destroyed...
Akane put her arms around him and drew him toward her, resting his head
against her shoulder. "It's okay, Doctor. Go ahead. Let it all out." Akane
held him as she felt Dr.Tofu's body shudder with his sobbing. They sat that
way for several minutes, Akane stroking his head and making soothing sounds.
Dr.Tofu was beyond listening to her words but the soothing rhythm was
comforting. After a few more minutes, Dr.Tofu pulled back, wiping his eyes
and nose.
"I'm... I'm sorry, Akane. I shouldn't have let you see that."
Akane took his hand. "It's alright. I knew the engagement must have hit you
pretty hard."
"It did." Dr.Tofu shook his head. "I... I guess I always thought that... that
deep down... she knew how I felt about her. I always thought that one day..."
"That one day...?"
"Oh, I don't know. But she must have known. She must have!"
"But you never told her."
"And now it's too late, isn't it?"
"I don't know. The engagement wasn't their idea. Ranma's father and mine
arranged it. It could have just as easily been me or Nabiki. But Kasumi's
sort of taken to it now. If she did know, maybe she just got tired of
waiting. But, if it's any consolation, I don't think she ever knew how you
really felt about her so it's not as if she really rejected you."
Dr.Tofu wrung his hands tensely. "But what do I do now? All this time I'd
always hoped that one day Kasumi and I would be together. Now that's all
changed. What am I supposed to do?"
"Dr.Tofu," Akane said. "I don't know if you've really lost her. If you're
going to be honest about it, you never really had her. Maybe you should just
get on with your life. Start thinking about other girls. You're a very
handsome man, Dr.Tofu. I'm sure there's lots of girls who'd like to go out
with you." She almost added, "like me," but decided better of it.
"That's nice of you to say, Akane. But I don't think I'm ready to let go of
her yet. It's going to take some time to get over this."
"Of course it will. But you can't just stay cooped up in this clinic in the
dark with the shades drawn. It's bad for your health, Doctor."
Dr.Tofu chuckled sadly. "Shouldn't that be my line, Akane?"
"Not today. Dr.Tofu, Nurse Akane prescribes fresh air and sunshine. Get out
of this clinic for a few days. Keep it closed a little longer. Just go out
and have fun. And that's an order."
"Yes, ma'am!" Dr.Tofu looked at Akane and, for the first time in several
days, smiled. "Thanks, Akane. I... well, thank you."
Akane gave him a warm hug. "Of course, Dr.Tofu. What are friends for?"
Akane cared deeply for Dr.Tofu. She'd had such a crush on him for so many
years and seeing him so broken now, she couldn't help but reach out to him.
If only it had been her that he'd fallen for...
She broke the embrace and stood up. "Now, come on. We need to get you out of
this stuffy old office for the afternoon. Let's go grab a couple of burgers
or something."
* * *
As Kasumi walked along the street, a vendor called out to her with a smile,
"Good afternoon, Kasumi! Going to Dr.Tofu's?"
Kasumi smiled back. "No. I'm just running a few errands."
Ranma, loaded down with grocery bags, staggered along behind her, grumbling to
himself. "I still don't see why I gotta carry all this stuff..."
* * *
"Preposterous! I shall do no such thing!" Kunou stomped angrily down the
hallway in the Kunou mansion, Kodachi and Sasuke trailing close behind him.
"Now, now, Brother dear. Don't make such a fuss. Is it really too much to
ask?"
"Ask?!" Kunou stopped short and spun about to face Kodachi. "Ask, you say!
'Tis a poor choice of word, my Sister. You do not ask, you order and I say I
must refuse such an order! Have you no respect for the honor of the name of
Kunou?!"
"That tired line again?"
Sasuke hopped nervously from one foot to the other. It was a wonder that he
had never gotten used to these fights after all his years of loyal servitude
and, whenever the Kunous fought, he dreaded his role as peacemaker.
This particular fight had begun when Kunou had discovered that the mansion's
larder had gotten low and there was not enough food in the house to prepare
the standard twelve-course dinner. This was due largely to the fact that
Kunou's inexperience with cooking had resulted in a lot of badly charred meals
going to waste. Kunou had announced that he was going out to purchase
supplies for dinner when Kodachi had made her demand.
"But, Brother dear. How else can I be sure you won't dally? You know I have
to keep a close eye on you since you seem to resent your chores so much and I
can't be with you every minute of the day."
"You insult me! Did I not say I would procure the victuals and return without
delay? Do you not trust the word of your own brother?"
"Frankly, no. Now be a good boy and do as you're told."
"You go too far, Sister. The great Tatewaki Kunou shall not be ordered
thusly!"
"Please, Master Kunou," Sasuke soothed. "It won't be so bad. I'll go with
you."
"No, Sasuke," Kodachi countered. "You're staying here. I need to practice my
ribbon targeting for the upcoming match against Kolhotz High School." She
turned back to her brother. "Now, are you going to agree to my request or
need I send certain revealing photographs to certain people you know?"
Kunou fumed angrily. "Very well. Let us get it over with."
Kodachi led Kunou back toward her bedroom. "Wonderful. I just knew you'd see
it my way, Brother dear."
* * *
Akane and Dr.Tofu sat on a bench in the park, eating from the bag of
hamburgers between them. Dr.Tofu picked disconsolately at his burger.
"Akane," he started. "Thanks for trying to cheer me up. It's really very
sweet of you."
Akane, mouth full of burger, swallowed and looked down at her half-eaten
burger. This was turning out to be harder than she'd thought it could be.
She'd been carrying a torch for Dr.Tofu for years now and she'd never told
him. She'd always held back because of his love for her sister Kasumi. And
now it seemed as if a match between Dr.Tofu and Kasumi would never happen.
Part of her had always hoped something like this might happen. That she'd
have her chance to be with Dr.Tofu. But it wasn't turning out as she'd hoped.
He was so sad, so dejected. How could she take advantage of a situation like
this? She couldn't, not with a clear conscience. She looked up at Dr.Tofu
and forced herself to smile for him. "That's okay. I... I know what it's
like to... to love somebody from afar."
Was that too much? The last thing Akane wanted to do was take advantage of
Dr.Tofu's situation. No, that wasn't true. That was exactly what she wanted
to do. But, as hard as it was to accept, she knew that it would be wrong to
do so. It might be possible to get close to Dr.Tofu now that Kasumi was out
of the way but, if she did, she'd still only be a substitute for Kasumi and
she wanted Dr.Tofu to love her for her own sake. But it was so hard to keep
her feelings to herself now.
Akane glanced at Dr.Tofu. He seemed so downcast. So lost and dejected. What
he really needed now was her friendship. Maybe, someday, she could give him
more than that but, for now, friendship would do. She'd been quiet too long.
She should say something. "Dr.Tofu..."
"Akane!" Kasumi called out. "And Dr.Tofu! Hello!"
"Ka... Kasumi-oneechan!" stammered Akane. Akane looked toward Dr.Tofu who sat
slack-jawed beside her. Akane looked back toward her sister. "Uh... uh...
hi, Kasumi."
Akane fumbled her burger wrapping back into the bag and stood up nervously.
Glancing at Dr.Tofu again, she could see his neck turning red with discomfort.
Kasumi smiled happily at them both.
Ranma staggered up beside Kasumi under his pile of grocery bags. He was about
to offer a friendly "Yo!" when he noticed Dr.Tofu and sensed the tension in
the air.
"So, uh," Akane mumbled, "Out shopping, huh?"
"Yes," Kasumi said. "With the extra company, we were running out of some
things."
"I... uh... yeah. Um."
Akane glanced nervously at Ranma. Ranma grimaced and eyed Dr.Tofu worriedly.
Dr.Tofu gritted his teeth as he stared longingly at Kasumi. Kasumi smiled
happily at the pleasantness of the day.
"Well," Akane said. "I... I guess we better leave you to it, then." She took
Dr.Tofu by the arm, hoping to lead him away quickly before anyone said
anything they might regret. "Come on, Dr.Tofu."
Akane pulled him around by the arm, ready to lead him away and came face to
face with Hitomi in a short, floral print dress and carrying a pair of
shopping bags.
"Akane!" she blurted. Kunou stared at Akane for a moment, then her hand on
Dr.Tofu's arm, then at Dr.Tofu himself. She narrowed her eyes a moment then
seemed to come back to herself. "Konnichiwa, Akane! Out... uh... out on a
date?"
"Oh my!" Kasumi said. "You're on a date?"
Dr.Tofu looked back at Kasumi, his eyes narrowing slightly. Slowly, he
removed Akane's hand from his arm and then placed his arm around her
shoulders. "Yes, that's right," he said. "A date."
Akane broke out in a sweat.
"Oh, how nice!" Kasumi smiled.
Kunou's smiled became strained.
Ranma stumbled over to Kunou. "Uh, Hitomi... can I talk to you for a minute?
Excuse us, folks."
Kunou frowned at Dr.Tofu and Akane and followed Ranma off to the side. Ranma
glanced back fretfully at Kasumi, Akane, and Dr.Tofu then turned back to
Kunou.
"Kunou! What the heck are you doing in that dress?!"
Kunou glanced down at the dress she was wearing and blushed. "This... this
was... at my sister's insistence. She claimed that it would encourage me to
return home as quickly as possible. I have... never been so... so..."
"Uh, well, if it's any consolation, you don't look that bad, actually."
"Shut up. And why is my dear Akane on a date with that man? Can I not leave
her to your care for even a minute?!"
"That's Dr.Tofu. I... uh... I don't know why they're dating. I thought he
liked Kasumi but it looks like he changed or something."
"I see. So now that Kasumi is taken, his love has changed to Akane? How
impermanent his heart is."
"I'm not sure he's really switched or not. It's pretty sudden. Um, look, we
better talk about this later, okay?" Ranma tilted his head toward Kasumi,
Akane, and Dr.Tofu. "I don't want a scene or nothing."
Ranma and Kunou rejoined the others. Kasumi smiled at Kunou. "Ranma, aren't
you going to introduce your friend?"
"Oh, uh, sorry. Yeah, this is... uh, Hitomi. Hitomi, this is Kasumi and
that's Dr.Tofu and, uh, well, you've already met Akane, right?"
"How nice to meet you, Hitomi," Kasumi smiled. "Are you a friend of Ranma's
from school?"
Kunou glanced at Dr.Tofu and his arm on Akane's shoulder. How dare he! This
was Ranma's fault. If he hadn't taken Kasumi away from Dr.Tofu... Kunou's
usually approach to a problem was the hit it very hard and hoped that made it
go away. Well, actually it was to pose, make long incoherent speeches, then
hit it very hard and hoped that made it go away. But she could hardly fight
in a dress and, something in the way Dr.Tofu carried himself warned Kunou that
he would not be an easy opponent. Brute strength wouldn't work here. She'd
have to rely on other means. Slowly, gears long disused in Kunou's mind began
to turn. Kunou narrowed her eyes as an idea occurred to her. Turning to
Kasumi, she smiled and said, "Yes, that's right! Ranma and I are very close."
She set her bags down and put an arm around Ranma's shoulder.
Ranma gulped and broke out in a heavy sweat.
"Oh," Kasumi said. "That's... that's nice."
Dr.Tofu glared angrily at Ranma. "Come on, Akane. Let's go."
"O... okay." Akane glanced back at Ranma, and Kunou's arm around him. She
turned with Dr.Tofu and walked away.
Ranma turned to Kunou and whispered angrily, "What the hell was that about?! I
thought you didn't want Akane to think there was anything between us, you
freak!"
"Ranma," Kasumi said. "Um... we'd better... um, let's go home."
"Oh, uh, sure, Kasumi." Ranma glared at Kunou and whispered, "We'll talk
about this later."
Kunou watched them leave. Deceit was not her usual mode. That was more
Kodachi's style. Had she gone too far? As long as no one knew that she was
Kunou...
* * *
"Kunou, you jerk! Just what the hell were you trying to pull?! Are you
trying to make me look bad or something?! I got enough problems without you
going all weird on me like that! And another thing..."
Kunou held the telephone receiver away from his ear for a few moments while he
waited for Ranma to finish ranting. "If you are quite through, Saotome-kun?"
"Yeah, what?!"
"You know well the depths of my love for Akane Tendou. While acting a tryst
with you may cause me discomfort, no pain is too great that I shall not endure
it to win the heart of my dear Akane."
"What about me?! After that scene you pulled, I'll never convince them that's
there nothing between us! And if anyone founds out who `Hitomi' really is,
they're gonna think I'm kinda freaky pervert!!"
"Then 'tis best not to tell them."
"ARRGGH!!! I can't believe... the next time you pull something like this,
clear it with me first, Kunou-kun."
"You have my word, Saotome-kun. Now, if you will excuse me, I... uh... have
to do the laundry."
"Yeah, I'd better go before anyone notices I'm on the phone. Ja ne."
Ranma hung up the phone and stared at it, fuming. That Kunou was really
pushing it. He really wanted to clear this stupid mess up. Things were
already awkward enough as it was but now Akane and Kasumi thought he was
dating "Hitomi" and Ranma couldn't figure out anyway to make it clear that he
wasn't without exposing Kunou but Kunou was still his friend and Ranma knew
how horribly embarrassed he'd be if anyone knew but, then again, it would
Kunou's fault if it came to that... ARRGGH!!! This was just going in circles.
There just didn't seem to be any easy way out of it.
"Ranma, who was that on the phone?" asked Kasumi.
Ranma jumped with surprise. "Wha?! Oh! The phone? Oh, uh, nobody. Just,
uh, a wrong number, I think. Yeah. Hmmm."
Kasumi frowned.
* * *
Saturday night...
"Akane," Kasumi said. "Hitomi-chan's here."
Akane opened the door of her bedroom. "Hitomi-chan! I'm glad you could make
it!"
Kunou smiled, "Of course, Akane-kun. I wouldn't dream of missing your party!"
Ranma bolted up the stairs from the living room. "Ku... I mean, Hitomi!"
Ranma leaned in and whispered, "What are you doing here?! I thought I told
you not to come!"
"And who are you give me orders, Saotome-kun?" Kunou whispered back.
Ranma turned to Akane and Kasumi. "Um, I'm sorry. Will you excuse us for a
minute. I gotta talk to Hitomi alone."
"Uh, okay," said Akane. "We'll be in here. Hitomi-chan, just come on in when
you're finished." She glanced at Ranma, shook her head, and closed the door.
Kasumi looked at Ranma and Kunou the turned away. "I have some things I
should be doing in the kitchen," Kasumi said and headed for the stairs. Ranma
watched her go and then turned to Kunou.
"Alright, what's the big idea coming here?!"
"Saotome-kun, I shall do as I please. You are not my master."
"You're really pushing our friendship, Kunou-kun."
"Be that as it may, I am attending Akane's party and you shall not stop me."
Ranma shook his head. "Okay, fine. Go ahead. But I'm gonna be keeping an
eye on you, you got that? You try any funny stuff and you'll regret it. And
you better tell Akane we're not dating or you're gonna get me in trouble!"
Ranma glanced toward the stairs where Kasumi had left.
"We shall see, Saotome-kun," Kunou said and turned to Akane's door.
"Akane-chan! I'm coming in."
Ranma put his hand on the doorknob. "Tell her we're not dating."
Kunou grunted and opened the door. "Konbonwa, Everybody!"
Ranma watched as the door closed behind Kunou. From inside he could hear
girlish giggling. That jerk Kunou. No way he could trust him alone with
Akane. He put an ear to the door and could hear muffled conversation but
couldn't make anything out. He'd have to resort to more extreme measures.
Ranma hopped down the stairs and headed for the backyard. As he passed the
kitchen, Kasumi glanced up from the tray she was setting. Ranma and...
Hitomi? She frowned and finished setting her tray with tea, cups, and some
rice crackers. Sighing, she took the tray up the stairs.
* * *
"Hitomi-chan, this is Yuka and Sayuri. They're in my class."
Kunou bowed. "Hajimemashite."
Yuka smiled. "Nice to meet you," Sayuri said.
"And this is my sister, Nabiki."
"Hajimemashite."
"Hiya," Nabiki said.
"Don't be shy. Come on, join us," Akane said, pulling Hitomi's arm.
Kunou began to sit cross-legged on the floor, remembered herself, and tucked
her legs beneath herself like the other girls.
Nabiki said, "We were just talking about boys."
"Ne, ne," Sayuri said. "Hitomi, are there any boys you like?"
"Ah, er," stammered Kunou. "Me? Um, oh, I don't know..."
There was a knock at the door and Kasumi came in with a tray of tea and rice
crackers. Kunou looked at her, looked at Akane, steeled her nerve and said,
"Well, there's Ranma, of course."
Kasumi placed the tray on the floor between the girls.
"The new boy?" Yuka asked. "He's pretty cute. I hear he's really good at
martial arts."
"Yeah, did you see him at gym practice?" asked Sayuri. "He was wearing this
Chinese shirt with no sleeves. He's really well-built!"
"He's so cool!" Yuka said.
Akane cast a worried look at Kasumi.
"Ranma and I are quite close," Kunou said. "He's... uh, really cool."
"He's... he's not so special," Kasumi said.
"Kasumi..." Akane said.
"Sumimasen. I... excuse me." Kasumi quickly stood and left.
Nabiki cast a glance toward the closed door and sighed. "Oi, Hitomi," Nabiki
said.
"Er, yes?"
"There's something you're not telling us, isn't there?"
"Na... Nabiki Tendou, what do you mean?"
"I mean that there's something you're not telling us. About your relationship
to Ranma."
"What? Why would I..."
Nabiki peered at Kunou, menacingly calculating. Kunou was loathe to admit it
but Nabiki Tendou was not easy to fool. If she had worked out Kunou's true
identity already...
"Hitomi..." Nabiki began.
"Ye... yes?"
"I can get you a good deal on some pictures of Ranma, if you're interested."
* * *
Ranma crept along the side of the house. If he had the layout figured
correctly, he should be right below Akane's window on the second floor now.
Ranma carefully inserted his fingers into a crack in the wall, and slowly made
his way up to the window.
* * *
"So, uh, Akane," Kunou began. "What, um... how did your... date... with
Dr.Tofu go?"
"Ooooo! You went on a date with Dr.Tofu, Akane?" Nabiki asked. "You didn't
say anything about it before."
Akane blushed. "It... it wasn't really a date. We're not like that. I mean,
we're friends but that's all."
"Hmmm..." Nabiki scowled. "Boring."
"It wasn't a date?" Kunou asked. "But, he was certainly acting quite familiar
with you."
"Oh, look, I don't know. Why would Dr.Tofu be interested in me, anyway?"
"Who's Dr.Tofu?" Yuka asked.
Nabiki shrugged. "He's a local chiropractor. Akane's had this big crush on
him for years."
"Nabiki!" Akane growled.
"Wow, Akane," Sayuri said. "You and a doctor? That's pretty cool!"
"Yeah," Yuka agreed. "What's he like? Is he cute?"
"Dr.Tofu is..." Akane began. "He's... very kind and gentle. And, well, yeah,
I... I guess he is pretty cute, too. He's got the warmest smile and he really
cares about people. He's very sensitive."
"Hey, he does sound like a real catch," Yuka said.
"Yeah," said Sayuri. "If it were me, I'd go for it."
"Oh, forget it," Akane said. "Dr.Tofu isn't interested in me."
"He certainly seemed that way," Kunou smiled through clenched teeth.
"That's... that's just ridiculous!" said Akane. "Why would he be interested
in someone like me? I'm... I'm not so special."
"What?!" Kunou asked. "Akane! Of course, you're special! You're the most
attractive girl in Fuurinkan High School! Do you think so many of our fellow
students would pursue you so enthusiastically each morning if you were not?"
"She's got a point, sis," Nabiki agreed.
"That?" Akane asked. "You can't be serious. They try to beat me up every
morning."
"Of course, Akane," Kunou said. "Aren't you flattered that they compete so
arduously for your love?"
"How am I supposed to be flattered by that?! It just ticks me off."
Kunou gasped. "You.. you are... upset? By that?"
"Of course, it upsets me! How would you feel if people treated you like a
trophy in a contest?"
"A trophy?"
"They don't really care about how I feel. I'm not a comic book character; I'm
a real person. Why can't anybody see that?"
Kunou slumped forward. She'd never really thought about it that way. It had
always seemed so straightforward. Defeat Akane and she would submit to
dating. That was how you solved a problem, by conquering it. But now it
seemed that Akane had somehow been hurt by this approach.
"Akane," Kunou began. "I never... I mean, um... if it bothers you so much,
maybe I could try to get them to stop."
"Hitomi? That would the great! But how?"
"Um... I, uh, I know Kunou's sister. I... I could talk to her and see if she
could talk him into... ah... rescinding his order."
"Kunou has a sister?" Nabiki asked. "Yuck. One Kunou is bad enough."
Kunou turned on Nabiki angrily. "I will not allow you... uh... I mean, it's
not polite to talk that way about someone you've never met, Nabiki Tendou."
Akane took Kunou's hand. "Thank you, Hitomi-chan. If you could do that for
me, I'd really owe you one."
Kunou's heart melted. To hold hands with the beauteous Akane! What bliss!
"Akane, you are a warm and beautiful person. You should take pride in
yourself. You have grace and an inner beauty. If those fools can not see
that, they are blind as well as foolish. You have courage and compassion and
any man who sees that would be sure to fall for you."
"Hey!" Yuka shouted, pointing at the window. "What's that?!"
"Someone's peeping at us!" Sayuri gasped.
Kunou leapt to her feet, threw open the window, and grabbed Ranma by the
collar. "Saotome-kun!" she hissed. "What do you think you are doing?!"
"Ranma!" gasped Akane. "What... what are.. you were peeping at us?!"
"It's Ranma!" Yuka and Sayuri said, straightening their clothes and blushing.
"Kasumiiiii!" Nabiki called through the door. "Your fiance's a peeping Tom!"
"I'm so embarrassed," Akane said.
"It's not like that!" Ranma protested. "I was just, I mean, no! I was... I
only... It's not my fault!" Ranma frowned at Kunou and growled.
"Oh, really?" Kunou smiled and released Ranma's collar.
Ranma's arms pinwheeled wildly as he tried to maintain his balance.
"Now leave us, Saotome-kun," Kunou said and slammed the window shut.
Ranma folded his arms angrily and, just before he dropped out of sight,
silently mouthed the words, "It ain't over, Hitomi-kun."
Kunou turned away from the window. How dare Saotome-kun spy on them! Had he
no respect for privacy? Kunou would definitely have words with her friend
later. "Akane, I... don't know what to say. Ranma was..."
"It's okay," Akane said. "I know what you mean. Listen, thank you for what
you said a minute ago. I guess I don't have the best self-confidence in the
world. What you said means a lot to me."
"And I meant it, Akane," Kunou insisted. "Every single word."
"Thanks, Hitomi," Akane smiled. "You're a good friend. I'm going to take
your advice."
"That's the spirit!" Kunou smiled. "You really are a very special person."
"So you really think Dr.Tofu will go out with me?"
"Eh? Dr.Tofu? Uh..."
"I guess I'll never know if I don't try, right?"
"Er, ah..." Kunou stammered.
"I mean, if I just give up now, it's worse than losing. I'm going to go for
it."
"That's great, Akane," said Yuka.
"Yeah!" Sayuri agreed. "Go for it!"
"A.. Akane... I..." spluttered Kunou.
"Hitomi-chan," Akane said. "Thank you. You're a really sweet person. With
all respect for my sister, I... I hope things with Ranma work out for you."
"Ra... Ranma?"
A loud patter of feet running up the hallway outside sounded and the four
girls jumped in surprise as the bedroom door burst open. "Akane-oneechan!"
Little Ranma shouted then leapt across the room and threw his arms around
Akane protectively.
Akane blinked in confusion. "Ah... er..."
"Oh! What a cute little boy!" said Sayuri.
"Who is he?" Yuka asked Akane.
"Who? Oh, this little boy? Oh, uh, he's... uh..."
"I'm Ranma!" Little Ranma said.
"Ranma?" said Yuka and Sayuri incredulously.
"Hey," Yuka said. "He does kind of look like Ranma."
"Maybe he's Ranma's brother," suggested Sayuri.
"Sure," Yuka said. "I've heard of it happening, giving two brothers the same
name."
Kunou scowled at the little boy. More trickery, then? Kunou was already a
bit upset and now this? Anger and frustration swelled in Kunou's heart.
Didn't Ranma realize how important this was? Didn't he realize how fragile
and precious were each cherished moment spent in the company of the angelic
Akane Tendou? How dare he intrude like this! Every man had his limits.
Kunou stood up, straightened her skirt, and stomped angrily over to Ranma.
Plucking the little boy up by his shirt collar, Kunou turned to Akane and
said, "Please excuse me, Akane. Little Ranma-chan and I need to have a few
words alone if you don't mind."
Akane looked at Hitomi and Ranma and sighed. Why was Ranma behaving so rudely
tonight? He'd seemed like a pretty nice guy earlier. But peeping in on them
and now barging in on their slumber party? How embarassing it must be for his
poor girlfriend. "Sure, Hitomi-chan." Akane said. "We'll just wait for you
in here, okay?"
Kunou nodded and carried Ranma down the hall to the bathroom. A quick douse
of hot water from the tap and Ranma was back to his normal sixteen years.
Kunou, still in girl-form, and Ranma glared angrily at each other in the
bathroom.
"Saotome-kun," Kunou began. "What treachery is this?! I thought you called
yourself my friend!"
"Don't pull that friend crap on me, Kunou-kun," growled Ranma. "I AM your
friend but that doesn't mean I'm gonna put up with your stupid stunts, baka."
"Ha! If you were indeed my friend, you would not interfere! The opportunity
to spend an evening with the beauteous Akane is a rare and treasured thing.
Know ye not the depths of my love for her?! Or are you too much of a child to
understand such things?"
"Child? CHILD?!!!" Ranma exploded. "You take that back, Kunou!!!"
"The truth stings, does it not? I speak only as my mind perceives. I shall
not retract my judgement."
"You wouldn't know the truth if it bit you on the ass, you stupid jerk! If
you wanna know the truth, I'll tell you the truth! The truth is that sneaking
in here and pretending to be a girl just so you can get close to Akane is
about as low and dishonorable as a jerk like you could sink! And don't think
I didn't hear that crap you were feeding Kasumi! You like Akane, that's fine.
Whatever. But don't go making me a part of your lies, Kunou, because, friend
or not, at least I have some sense of honor!"
"You... you dare call the great Tatewaki Kunou... dishonorable?!"
"The truth stings, don't it?" sneered Ranma.
"Saotome, I will not tolerate such bile from the likes of you. Our friendship
is at an end!"
"Oh, yeah? Well, that's just fine with me!"
"Very well," Kunou growled. "If you'll excuse me, I believe Akane is awaiting
my return." Kunou spun about flounced furiously back down the hall to Akane's
room.
"Yeah, you just go ahead and have fun!" Ranma called after her. "Just don't
come crying to me when it all blows up in your face!" Ranma folded his arms
angrily and sat back against the sink. That Kunou. Dumb jerk. Why had they
ever been friends in the first place?
-------
Notes: Okay, that's what I have so far. The next scene is going to skip
ahead to the next day when Kunou is at home and will be about how Kunou
is still mad at Ranma for butting in but, the more he thinks about it,
the more he starts to notice a feeling he's never really been familiar
with before: guilt.
The way I see it, Kunou has no friends. His mother's dead, his father
abandoned him, his sister doesn't care about him, and nobody at school
likes him because he's such an arrogant prat. Ranma is his first real
friend. They became friends while on the way back from Jusenkyou which
is shown in a flashback while Kunou feels guilty. He decides to try to
make it up to Ranma which leads to some complications when Ryouga shows
up the next day.