Magical Interludes: December's End
Fanfic by J.K. Hayashi
Chapter 6: Negotiations - Part III
Secretary: "I'm sorry Inspector, Principal Kuno is not expected back
until the next school year."
Inspector: "What do you mean?"
Secretary: "He's been on sabbatical in Hawaii for two-and-a-half
years."
Inspector: "Since when does a principal go on sabbatical?"
Secretary: "Look, he's rich and he's got connections. Who's going
to stop him?"
Inspector: "I see. Is there a way that I can get in contact with the
family? It's of greatest importance."
Secretary: "His son attends school here. Room 2-E."
**********************
Junior Class Teacher: "Kuno."
Kuno: "Yes, teacher?"
Junior Class Teacher: "Go with this policeman, here."
Various Students: "Did you hear that? I knew Kuno was a
delinquent. Hah! He's finally getting arrested! Good! I
can't believe how many times he skipped class."
Nabiki was glad that she and Keiko expanded their selling base as it
looked like Kuno was getting arrested with his sister (thereby losing
her largest market).
Kuno: "My honor has been impinged! 'Reputation, reputation,
reputation! O, I have lost my reputation! I have lost that
the immortal part of myself, and what remains is bestial.'"
Inspector: [to teacher] "Why is he quoting Shakespeare?"
Kuno: "You have taken my good name and cast it down. Prepare to
be vanquished, cur!"
Inspector: "Are you some kind of dim bulb?"
Kuno brings his bokken down on Inspector Muramoto's head, only
to have it miss when the inspector quickly dodges the blow; the
bokken digs into the concrete floor. He jumps when the inspector
attempts to sweep his legs out from under him, then realizes his
mistake of not releasing the bokken when the inspector uses it as a
lever to smash him into the blackboard.
Nabiki watches the scene with interest. The inspector, she reasons,
must be the same person (from what Kasumi said) that her father
attempted to engage her to last night. She takes a quick inventory:
not too old, pretty good looking, pretty good fighter... and a potential
source of information. She decides to keep him in mind for the
future.
Feeling eyes on him, the inspector looks up but can't find the source
as Nabiki has already turned away from her study. The inspector
shrugs to himself, then drags the unconscious Kuno from the room.
**********************
Cologne: "Hello. This is Cologne. Give me the General. Hello
General? I accept your offer. I will start evaluating all
known martial artists starting with the local Nerima
fighters tonight. Very good. I will meet with you
tomorrow to start planning out strategy. You'll send over
your investigator with a report of the known local district
fighters? Very well, Good-bye, General."
**********************
Kuno wakes up when Inspector Muramoto dumps a bucket of water
on him. They are both in the hallway outside of the classroom.
Inspector: "Now, are you ready to talk?"
Kuno: "What is it, sirrah?"
The Inspector whacks Kuno in the head with the bokken.
Inspector: "Didn't anyone teach you respect?"
Kuno sulks, but listens.
Inspector: "Now, your sister has been seen stalking around the
Tendo Dojo. I've positively identified her from newspaper
photographs, but would like to resolve the situation
quietly."
Kuno: "How?"
Inspector: "Well, if your sister will swear to keep away from the
dojo, then all can be resolved peacefully. I will get a judge
to quietly draw up a restraining order, and everything will
be kept quiet. Otherwise, I'll have to arrest her and its
almost guaranteed that your family name will be brought to
the public."
Kuno: "Very well, I'll talk to her."
Inspector: "You will get her to agree. I will come over to your
house tomorrow night to finalize our arrangement."
***************
Cologne came hopping into the Tendo Dojo followed by a young girl
with long, brown hair in a (very loose) military uniform, meeting
everyone in the dojo.
Cologne: "Captain Ninomiya, report!"
The girl starts jumping up and down happily while reading from a
small pocketbook.
Hinako: "Yay! The Tendo Dojo: Known martial artists - Soun
Tendo, Akane Tendo, Genma Saotome, Ranma Saotome,
Keiko Saotome, Midori Saotome, and Ayuki Saotome.
Associated martial artists - Ryoga Hibiki, Ukyou Kuonji..."
Ukyou peeks her head in the door in curiosity.
Ukyou: "Hello? I received a note to come here?"
Ukyou suddenly screams as Happosai latches onto her breasts. She
quickly scrapes him off her body with her giant spatula and flings
him across the dojo, but before anyone else can react the little girl
pulls out a five-yen piece and holds it with her fingers between
herself and Happosai.
Hinako: "Bad Man! You need a lesson! Happo-Five-Yen-Drain!"
The air becomes heavy and oppressive as Happosai's chi-energy
flows from his body into Hinako's. When it is over Happosai lies
withered on the ground and Hinako has become a curvaceous
woman whose uniform is suddenly body-hugging. Her voice is
lower and more throaty.
Hinako: "...and Happosai."
Everyone's eyes widen in surprise. Ryoga spouts another nosebleed
and faints.
*******************************************finis Chapter 6
[Author's note #1: I don't know the ranks for the Japanese Self-
Defense Forces, so I just used the American equivalents in the case
of the General and his officers.]
[Author's note #2: The "Inspector" character was a totally
spontaneous creation when I realized I needed a martial artist
policeman in order to not have Kodachi just beat him up when he
attempted to arrest her. Unfortunately, I couldn't use an already
established character as none of the known (unintroduced)
characters seemed to fit the story.]
[Author's note #3: My cut-off for stories is the end of (american)
volume 5, and Kuno's father (the principal) hasn't been introduced
in the storyline yet. So how do Ranma and Akane know that he is
the principal? Since as of this point (in the manga) there has been
no mention of Kuno's family or the principal of Furinkan High
School, I'll make the change that the principal has just been on a
sabbatical to Hawaii for three years and that his appointment is
common knowledge (though no one will see him for another month
or so); meanwhile the school is run by a temporary principal.]
[Author's note #4: The mysterious watcher in Chapter 4 was Hinako
Ninomiya in her adult form as she investigated them for the army -
the feeling of danger passed when she reverted to child form. The
army started (secretly) investigating martial artists not long after
The Chaos started while discussing how to best protect the populace,
which is how they found and finally settled on Cologne to head the
training program as the premier (or one of them) martial artist in
the country. Hinako just left a trail of drained civilians along the
way. In this altered history, Hinako's reputation as a teacher was
already known and she was promptly recruited (as Cologne was) by
the General.]
[Author's note #5: I couldn't think of a more imaginative english
expression for Hinako's energy drain than "Happo-Five-Yen-Drain"
(well, I did think of the "Happosai Power Suck" but rejected it as too
sexually suggestive). Unfortunately it can't all be as easy as
"Chestnut Punch" or "Tiger Roar".]
[Author's note #6: I had intended for this story to be compatible
with the Ranma 1/2 (american) manga series up to the end of
Volume 5 (see Introduction at the beginning of Chapter 1 - Lost
Lives), but the Viz translators slipped me up. Since I began writing
the storyline before Volume 5 started, I used the standard fanfic
spelling for the character of Ukyou, using "Uk-chan" to denote
Ranma's nickname for her and "Uc-chan's" to denote her business.
However, the Viz translation has her name as "Ukyo" and the
nickname as "Ucchan"; but it is too late to go back and change it, so
the spellings I have will be correct for this and all subsequent
storylines in the series.]
Next:
Chapter 7: Tests
Cologne fights! Semester exams! Getting ready for the New Year's!