Before I get to the story, I'd just like to thank everyone
that wished me a happy birthday. :) I was hoping I'd get that as
well as cooments on my story, but idea pretty much flopped. (Yes,
it really was my birthday yesterday)
Enough talking.
Chapter 18
[Nameless roof, Late morning]
Ranma-chan: (Staring at P-Ran-chan) You ARE insane.
P-Ran-chan: Why?
Ranma-chan: Who on earth would want to kill themselves because one
uncute, clumsy tomboy died?
P-Ran-chan: Tell me, who made you so upset this yesterday
and today?
Ranma-chan: ....
P-Ran-chan: (Looking up to the sky) You oughta start considering
her feelings, Ranma. Even if she doesn't die, she only has so much
patience.
Ranma-chan: Tell me about it! She gets mad all the time, thinks you
can cook something in two seconds,-
P-Ran-chan: (Annoyed) That wasn't what I meant.
Ranma-chan: Then what did you mean?
P-Ran-chan: When Akane wants out, she gets out.
Ranma-chan: (Getting up) P-Ran, if you care so much about Akane,
mom and everybody (Yells) WHY NOT JUST TAKE OVER MY
WHOLE LIFE!? I'm sure no one will notice, and like you a lot better!
P-Ran-chan: (Taken aback) What on earth are you talking about?
Ranma-chan: (Disgusted) Oh, don't tell me you haven't noticed. Breaking
Ucchan's heart; taking my place in Akane's life and telling MY mom MY
secret! I have enough guys wanting the fiancees I never wanted in the
first place, the LAST thing I need is another me!
P-Ran-chan: I'm trying to help you, not take ruin it!
Ranma-chan: Could have fooled me! I don't need no help, 'specially not
from you!
P-Ran-chan: (Getting up) I'm leaving, I can tell when I'm not wanted.
(Ranma-chan glare at each other, blue auras surrounding them. P-Ran-chan
leaves, pissed. Ranma-chan jumps back onto the ground, walking back to
Ucchan's)
Nodoka: (Walking down the same street) Hello again, Ranko!
Ukyou: (Next to Nodoka) The two of us are going to the Tendo's. Do you
want to come with us, Ranko?
Ranma-chan: (Stiffening) The Tendo's? No, I don't think so-
Voice: Girl-type Ranma!
Nodoka: (Eyes widening) GIRL-type Ranma?...
(Shampoo jumps from behind them, and glomps onto Ranma-chan)
Ranma-chan: (Trying to push Shampoo away) Shampoo, stop this!
You've got the wrong person!
Shampoo: You not tell Shampoo what do!
(Shampoo closes Ranma-chan's nose with her fingers, and kisses
her VERY passionately. slowly, but surely, Ranma-chan starts to
turn blue)
Ukyou: (Pulling Shampoo) What do you think you're doing!
(Manages to get Shampoo off Ranma-chan, who's taking deep breaths
of air)
Shampoo: Shampoo kiss girl-type Ranma to death! (Smiles) Is best
way to get rid of her.
Nodoka: (Kneeling next to Rama-chan) Ranko, what does that girl mean
by 'Girl-type Ranma'?
Ranma-chan: She, er, that is- (Shampoo gives Ranma-chan a kick)
Shampoo: (Rasing her hands in an defense position) Stop talking to
lady and fight!
Nodoka: Wait.
Shampoo: (At first she doesn't listen to Nodoka, but does when she
finds her katana in front of her face) Why you get in way of Shampoo?
Nodoka: NOBODY but NOBODY threatens the life of my friends or
family!
Shampoo: (Grinning) So you challenge Shampoo? (Pulls out her sword)
Nodoka: (Eyes bulging) Well, actually, er....
Shampoo: If you no want fight, get out Shampoo's way. She
very busy, no time for play. (Pushes Nodoka away)
Ranma-chan: (Seeing Shampoo push her mother down, she
takes a hold of Shampoo's arms) (Growls) Shampoo, you
touch my mother and you'll sincerely regret it.
Nodoka: *Mother...?*
Shampoo: I kill you, so it make no difference.
(Gives Ranma-chan a high kick, which hits Ranma-chan squarely
in her stomach. Ranma-chan reels off, clutching at her midsection)
Ukyou: (Throws a spatula into Shampoo's shoulder) Leave Ran-chan
alone, Shampoo!
Shampoo: Not-nice girl also want fight Shampoo?
Ukyou: (Turning red from anger) I am TO nice!
Shampoo: That not matter now; you sure you want fight me?
Ukyou: (Glaring) I just want you to stay away from Ran-chan and all
my other friends.
Ranma-chan: (Standing next to Ukyou) Can you take the two of us?
Shampoo: (Cooly) That child play.
Nodoka: (Taking her place next to the couple, holding her katana)
How about all THREE of us?
Shampoo: (Frowning) That too is child play, but Shampoo want only
fight girl-type Ranma.
Ranma-chan: (Shouting) Will you stop calling me that!
Shampoo: (Cracking her knuckles) You need not worry, once you dead
we not need say your name!
(Lunges at Ranma-chan, and Ranma-chan starts to defend herself.
Again, Nodoka stops this by holding her katana in front of Shampoo)
Nodoka: What kind of girl are you, wanting to kill another with no good
reason?
Shampoo: (Blinking) But Shampoo have good reason;
girl-type Ranma destroy my honor!
Nodoka: (Shocked) Ranko! What did you do to her?
Ukyou: (Getting her large spatula) Don't worry, Mrs. Saotome,
it's just one of her tribal laws that says she must kill Ran-chan.
(Charges to Shampoo, who's forced to stumble backwards)
Shampoo: (Extremely annoyed) Why must everyone get in way
of Shampoo's duty?
Ukyou: You really need to get a life, Sha-
(Just at that moment, a sprinkler is turned on. Shampoo is soaked,
and Nodoka watches her transformation in awe. Ranma-chan yells
as Shampoo-neko jumps at Ranma-chan; Ranma-chan runs away,
yelling and Shampoo-neko hot in pursuit)
Nodoka: Wh-what happened? And WHO was that?
Ukyou: (Placing her large spatula on her back) Meet Shampoo, the
(Thinks quickly) black magic amazon girl.
Nodoka: (Looking at Ukyou strangely) 'black magic amazon girl'?
Ukyou: (Nodding nervously) Yep. Shampoo turned herself into a
cat because she wanted to escape, and she knows Ran-chan is afraid
of them.
Nodoka: (Sweat drop going down the side of her face) I... see...
Ukyou: Let me explain it a little better...
[Nodoka and Ukyou continue on their way to the Tendo's as Ukyou tells Nodoka about Shampoo and some of her amazon laws. The scene fades]
Ok, I guess I should explain Shampoo trying to 'kiss gril-type
Ranma to death'. I was asking Rebecca (a school friend) how I ought
to kill off Akane. She doesn't know the first thing about anime or
ranma, so I was explaining to her my options; 'xept she understood
Shampoo's 'kiss of death' as 'kissing to death'. :) I found this
hilarious, and had to include it.
Isabel Arantes