Subject: Re: [FanFic] OMGod - Part 7
From: Brett Handy
Date: 12/4/1995, 4:56 PM
To: fanfic@andrew.cais.com

On Mon, 4 Dec 1995, Julian Fong wrote:

	Yes, I know I'm talking about you.  It doesn't make me
uncomfortable; rather, my initial impression was -- and please forgive me if
I come off as being insensitive -- that it seemed a little tedious.  From a
purely technical standpoint, you shouldn't need to include a chunk of
exposition like this.  Your purposes would be served much better if it came
out gradually, through your interactions with the other characters.  If you
can come up with an approach better than the one taken in Hopelessly Lost or
Street Fighter, more power to you.

Hmmmm - well I think I can understand your point....  I might do a little 
bit of editing.... Tedious hey?? - mate I think I've definately got to do 
some editing... 

	I commend you for being honest, and I don't have any problems at all
with your thoughts and feelings.  But please try to tell me something I
haven't heard before.

OK - well I've introduced a few new situtations in part eight that might 
suit the introdcution of that a little better (talking some problems out 
with a friend, that could make the introduction of that information more 
interesting....)

Hmmm - now where's that editor (I went back and took a look at some stuff 
by Gryphon?? was this it... also had a look at some of Bert's stuff and 
your right - it's been done like this before....)  Let's see if I can 
make it a little more original....

-----Brett

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Address: darkwnd@sv.net.au   WWW page: http://www.sv.net.au/~darkwnd

Kane: "Master, the other children tease me..."
Old Master: "Have you learnt nothing from my teachings, Grasshopper?"
Kane: "What do you mean master?"
Old Master: "Well can you not beat the Sh#T out of them???"

  -----Fast Forward (1990)
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