All characters belong to Rumiko Takahashi. All criticism public or otherwise 
is welcomed.

Who�s Number One?

It wasn�t the jab cross combo that knocked him out. It wasn�t the flying 
knee to the solar plexus that knocked him out. It wasn�t the vicious 
uppercut or the mean right hook either. It was the high kick. Ranma had a 
pretty good repertoire of kicks, but compared to the high kick that had hit 
him his were nothing. It had been a beautiful and ugly thing as he saw his 
opponent�s body twist to throw the perfect kick. His hands were held low 
when it happened which must have made Ranma look even more foolish when the 
blow had landed. He could even remember for a brief second the feeling of 
his opponent�s shin slamming into his neck. [1] Beyond that there was 
nothing else.
---
Ranma woke up slowly to see the face of his wife. The tears in her eyes told 
him who had won the fight. He tried to smile, but found that it hurt too 
much.
�Ow,� he managed to squeak out in a silly voice. It made her smile. That was 
good.
�Oh, Ranma. You�re awake. We were really afraid for a second back there.�
He knew the voice. Ranma slowly, and painfully, craned his neck so that he 
could look at Doctor Tofu. The smile on the doctor�s face was genuine and 
Ranma suddenly felt sorry for making everybody worry about him.
�So, how am I, doc?� Ranma said as he tried to get up. He immediately 
slumped back, his body giving him the answer. Akane was pushing him down, 
telling him to lie back down. He didn�t quite hear his wife, but instead 
focused on what Doctor Tofu was saying.
�I wouldn�t move around too much, Ranma. An ambulance should be here in a 
five minutes and I�ve scheduled a CAT scan in a couple of hours.�
�Jeeze, man. It�s not like I haven�t had my knocks before. I�ll be fine,� 
Ranma said doing his best to sound confident. But then he caught the sad 
look on Akane�s face. It was wrong.
�Ranma, I saw the fight. I really think you should listen to Doctor Tofu.�
Ranma knew in that instant that Akane was right and it terrified him.
---
�I�m happy to tell you that there doesn�t seem to be anything wrong, Mr. 
Saotome.�
Akane breathed a sigh of relief and a few tears came down her face. It made 
Ranma feel like a real heel. Next time he fought that guy he would 
definitely be more careful, and he would definitely win.
The doctor began to lecture Ranma on the dangers of martial arts 
competitions, but it wasn�t getting through. Ranma had always been good at 
phasing out these discussions when he heard them. Soon, Ranma and Akane were 
out of the hospital and in a cab.
Seeing that his wife was still upset Ranma settled for doing most of the 
talking.
�Man, I can�t wait to get back to the dojo. I�m gonna really hit the bags 
this time. Gotta get in shape for the rematch-"
�Stop it,� Akane said, almost whispering.
�What?� Ranma asked looking at his wife. Akane was staring at the floor and 
he could see tears coming to her eyes. �Ah, come on, Akane! It�ll be even 
better next time. I�ll knock this guy silly.�
�Ranma, do you even remember the fight?� Akane said, still not looking at 
Ranma.
�Well, actually�� Ranma tried to remember it, but could only grasp at a few 
images of punches, a face mocking him and of that kick; that awful beautiful 
kick. �Can�t really. Guy must have come in with a real lucky move back 
there.�
�Ranma. Nabiki video taped the fight. I think you should see it before you 
do anything else,� Akane said firmly.
He would have argued further, but there was no point. It would just make 
Akane more upset. Anyway, it couldn�t hurt to look at a video.
---
It was disgusting, really. He had never taken the type to eve look at videos 
of himself training or fighting, but he knew that it didn�t look like this. 
What he saw was a man horribly mismatched, receiving a beating of biblical 
proportions. Ranma saw himself as someone else: Someone who could bleed, 
someone who could lose and (worst) someone who could die. There was a cross 
smashing into that other person�s face. A hook knocking the sweat from that 
other person�s hair. That other person was pathetic, but he tried which made 
the whole thing more depressing. The other person desperately tried to take 
his opponent down, but a sprawl and a series of knees to head was all that 
he received for his efforts. They were standing up again and Ranma knew what 
was coming next and even then it scared him. His hands were low as if 
waiting for it, needing it. And then the wait was over. The shoulders of the 
other man�s opponent adjusted and the left leg shot up and slammed perfectly 
with the side of the othe-no, Ranma�s neck. The vibrations from the kick 
flowed from Ranma�s neck towards his stomach and finally reached his legs, 
perhaps signaling them to collapse; they did.
Ranma stopped the tape not wanting to see Akane crying over his fallen body.
�I�m really sorry, Ranma.�
He looked up from the television and saw his wife standing behind him. He 
didn�t know how long she had been standing there. He got up and hugged her.
�Yeah, me too.�
---
�Oh, Ranma. Don�t you like the dinner I prepared?�
Ranma looked up from his untouched meal and saw a sad look on Kasumi�s face. 
Akane was gone, away to some seminar in Yokohama and wouldn�t be back for 
another day. Mr. Tendou and his dad were off with the old letch in Okinawa 
for �training.� So, that just left Ranma and Kasumi. Although he loved 
Kasumi as if she were his sister he found it strange that he didn�t like 
her. He didn�t dislike her, but Ranma found there was nothing to talk about 
with the oldest Tendou girl. She was nice, but in a way that made her seem 
distant, not human. Talking to her about his problems would be impossible so 
he said, �No, I�m sorry. I just got a lot on my mind.�
�Oh, okay. Well, you should eat up. You�ll need your strength to teach 
tomorrow,� Kasumi said smiling at him pleasantly.
Ranma frowned, but Kasumi missed it. She hadn�t seen the fight and didn�t 
know that he hadn�t taught a class in weeks. Fortunately, Akane had been 
pulling the slack and had taught most of the classes. While students looked 
up to Ranma as a hero they respected, and feared, Akane as well, so his 
presence wasn�t too greatly missed. All classes had been canceled while 
Akane was away. It would have made Ranma feel like a useless bum if he 
didn�t already feel that way.
�Oh, Ranma. I forgot to tell you something,� Kasumi said.
�What�s that, Kasumi?� Ranma said looking at her.
�I saw Hibiki Ryouga on television this afternoon.�
Ranma grunted at that. Ryouga was a ubiquitous fixture of Japanese 
television. Ryouga�s celebrity had always bothered Ranma. It didn�t make 
sense that Saotome Ranma the greatest martial artist in Japan was overlooked 
because Ryouga happened to be good at tossing men around in a singlet. You 
win won Olympic medal and everyone thinks you�re all that. But at least, 
Ranma thought, I can still take him in a fight.
�Yes, he�s going to be having a fight on the twenty-fifth on pay-per-view.�
�Fight? You�re kidding, right? That guy hasn�t had a fight in years.�
�No, he said that he would be fighting in the Honor Fighting Championship 
[2] at the end of this month.�
�Okay. So pig boy�s gonna step up. Guess getting all grabby with a bunch of 
guys in tights got boring. Who�s he fighting,� Ranma said as he reached for 
some food with his chopsticks.
Kasumi told him. The chopsticks fell on the table.
---
�Hibiki residence.�
�Akari! This is Ranma! You gotta put Ryouga on the phone!�
�Oh, Ranma! It�s so good to hear from you! I was so worried you were another 
reporter.�
�Please, Akari. I have to talk with Ryouga right now.�
�Oh, well. I guess I could get him. He�s almost done with his practice.�
�Yeah, yeah. Just get him on quick.�
�Hey, Ranma! Haven�t heard from you in a while! Whatcha been up to?�
�Ryouga! You can�t fight.�
�Wh-what do you mean I can�t fight, you idiot?! I could smash you-�
�No, no, no! You can�t fight on the 25th.�
�What? What�s the matter with you?�
�The guy you�re fighting. He�s gonna kill you.�
�Thanks for the vote of confidence, Saotome. I�m starting to remember why I 
didn�t like you.�
�I�m serious, Ryouga. I fought this guy and� and��
�And�?�
�He� beat me� Real bad.�
�Ahhh�. Okay, I�ll be careful.�
�Didn�t you hear me, Ryouga?! He beat me and I�m a billion times better than 
you!�
�Yeah, right.�
�I�m serious. This guy is real bad news. If you know what�s good for you 
you�ll pull out.�
�Don�t worry about me, Ranma. I�ve got everything under control. I have some 
old buddies here to train with and I�m coming up with a good game plan. 
It�ll be alright.�
�Are your good buddies going to carry your body out when you die. At least 
think of Akari! She�s too young to be a widow.�
�Saotome. This conversation is over.�
*Click *
---
The movie was stupid and boring, but it didn�t matter because they weren�t 
watching it. Akane sat next to her husband holding his hand as she continued 
to look at the phone on the table. Ranma pretended to pay attention to the 
movie all the while eyeing the phone as well.
�Ranma, I still don�t see why you didn�t want to order the pay-per-view.�
�I�ve seen Ryouga get beat a ton of times. Once more isn�t going to change 
nothin�.�
�Ranma, Ryouga�s an Olympic medallist. I�m sure he can get through this 
alright.�
�One,� Ranma said while looking at his wife, �he is a silver medallist. 
Number two ain�t a winner  [3] enough and two, you saw this guy, Akane. What 
he did to me. What he�ll do to Ryouga. It�ll be awful and you know it.�
Akane looked about ready to respond, but stopped herself. Ranma realized 
that Akane had just been trying to reassure herself, worried that her friend 
was going to be killed. And being the fool he was Ranma decided to crush her 
hopes. He wished he wasn�t so stupid. In truth Ranma hadn�t ordered the 
pay-per-view because he really didn�t want to see his childhood friend get 
destroyed. And besides, the television stations would be playing the 
highlights of it for the next couple of weeks.
�Akane, I�m sorry. What I meant was��
Before he could finish his thought the portable phone on the nearby rang. 
Akane jumped at it and pressed the phone to her face. Akari had told them 
she would call as soon as the fight was over. It was only three minutes 
after ten, which meant the fight hadn�t lasted long. Ranma didn�t want to 
know what happened.
�Akari! Is that you? Please, calm down,� Akane said into the phone. Ranma 
felt a tightness in his stomach. It got worse when he saw the shocked look 
on his wife�s face. The phone fell out of Akane�s hand and she stared at the 
television.
Ranma looked at her for a few seconds and finally asked, �What happened?�
�Ryouga won.�
�What? H-how?�
�Knockout in the first round.�
---
�Oh, Ranma! It�s so good to see you again! Would you like to come inside? 
Ryouga should be done working with the pigs in a few minutes.�
�Yeah, okay,� Ranma said as he followed the pig farmer into the house. He 
hadn�t been here in quite a while, but not much had changed. Reporters still 
hanged around hoping to get pictures of Ryouga and his family. It was a part 
of Ryouga�s life that Ranma did not particularly envy. But you take the good 
with the bad and he was now seeing the good. It was a huge western style 
house with beautiful paintings by artists too important for Ranma to 
remember and a staircase leading up to forever; all of it showed the lost 
boy�s wealth. Akari led Ranma to the back of the house to a large room in 
the back that could be called a den, but was more accurately a trophy room. 
There were many framed news clippings about Akari and her sumo pigs hung 
from the walls; and several photographs of Ryouga and Akari�s wedding. 
Ranma�s eyes went across wrestling trophies, awards from the government and 
found something that nearly made him die of jealousy. It was a large 
photograph of Ryouga standing in the center of a ring, screaming in 
happiness as tears rolled down his face. It had been an image that Ranma saw 
many times in the past two weeks, but still could not get over. Sure, he 
should be happy that his friend hadn�t been killed, that he�d come out 
victorious. But all the while Ranma thought that, maybe, that screaming, 
crying face; that perfect moment, should have been his own.
�Hey, Saotome! Come to see your betters!�
Ryouga twirled around to see Ryouga standing next to his wife. Ranma thought 
that he must have been staring at the picture for so long he didn�t notice 
Akari leave or see her return with Ryouga. Standing in the doorway Ryouga 
looked like the total goofball Ranma had always known him to be. The 
overalls Ryouga wore just further accentuated this effect.
Composing himself Ranma said, �Yeah, right. I just came to say you got 
lucky.�
�Feh,� Ryouga said as he walked into the room sitting down in a big leather 
chair. He motioned for Ranma to sit in the chair across from him.
Ranma took his seat and started to say something when Akari interrupted him. 
�I�ll make some tea while you boys talk. I�ll be back in a little while.�
�Thanks, Akari,� Ryouga said to his departing wife. Quickly turning back to 
Ranma he said, �So, did you see the fight?�
�Yeah, I saw it,� Ranma said leaving out that he had just seen the replay on 
regular television.
�Pretty cool. I told you I had a good game plan.�
�You shot in on that guy twice and hit him with the luckiest right hook 
ever. [4] That�s hardly a �good game plan�, Ryouga.�
Ranma waved a hand dismissively and said, �Whatever, Saotome. It worked and 
that�s all that matters.�
�Ryouga��
The lost man looked at Ranma strangely. Ryouga�s friend�s voice had suddenly 
become quiet and it was really creeping him out. �Yes?�
�What does this mean?�
�What does what mean?�
�This guy� This guy�� Ranma could barely get to the next part, but he knew 
he had to. �He destroyed me, Ryouga. He absolutely crushed me. And here you 
come and you beat him like it�s nothing. What does that mean?�
�You�re really starting to get weird, Ranma.�
�You,� Ranma said while pointing at Ryouga, �I can beat you any day of the 
week-�
�Hey!� Ryouga shouted.
�But you come along and knockout this guy I couldn�t lay a finger on. It 
doesn�t make sense. What did I do wrong?�
Ryouga looked at Ranma intensely for a second and struck a thoughtful pose 
as he said, �Maybe nothing.�
�What?�
�Maybe you didn�t do anything wrong,� Ryouga said while shrugging his 
shoulders. �Maybe this guy�s just better than you.�
Ranma�s head fell down and he said, �If that�s true. Then that means you�re 
better than me.�
�Not necessarily.�
Saotome�s head shot up as he looked for the lie in Ryouga�s face. It wasn�t 
there.
�What do you mean �not necessarily�?� Ranma asked.
�Well, everybody knows what a great wrestler I when I come into this fight,� 
Ryouga said not noticing the gagging noise Ranma made, �so I figured the guy 
would be too afraid of my shoot to let his hands fly. He couldn�t strike at 
me with confidence so I landed that hook. If I hadn�t I probably would have 
taken him down and pounded his lights out.�
�What?� Ranma asked, a puzzled look coming across his face.
Ryouga groaned and said, �I was a bad match-up for the guy. But those same 
strengths that helped me beat him wouldn�t let me beat you.�
�I still don�t get it.�
Resisting the urge to smack his friend Ryouga continued, �Just because 
Fighter A beats Fighter B who beat Fighter C doesn�t mean Fighter A can beat 
Fighter C. Styles make fights, Saotome. The guy was a bad match-up for you 
just like I�m a great match-up for you.�
Ranma thought about it for a second and said, �If that�s true then who�s the 
best. Who�s number one?�
�Well, maybe there isn�t a number one fighter.�
The idea was ludicrous to Ranma. He had always dreamed of becoming the best, 
the ultimate competitor and to hear Ryouga say there might not be a true 
champion was ridiculous. But then, he thought about what he had just been 
told. What Ryouga said made sense. He wasn�t the best, but neither was 
Ryouga. It was a bizarre truth, but, amazingly, not an awful one.
�Ryouga��
�Yes?�
�You�re not nearly as stupid as I thought you were.�
�Thanks for the sour persimmons, Saotome.[5]�
---
Ranma waved to the Hibikis as he walked away from their home and tried to 
get past the throng of reporters. Unfortunately, one of them recognized 
Ranma and said, �Hey! I know you! You�re that guy!�
�Thanks for remembering me so well,� Ranma muttered to the reporter.
�Nah, I heard about you. You�re a living legend. Can I do a quick 
interview,� the reporter said and opened up a notebook. The other newsmen 
hadn�t bothered to pay attention to Ranma and the one eager reporter and 
were still intent on taking photos of the Hibikis while they still could.
�Really, I don�t got the time for this,� Ranma said, but was not entirely 
resistant. He didn�t get this kind of attention very often.
�Come on! Please! I need something for my editor, tomorrow,� the reporter 
whined.
Ranma smiled at the pathetic man and said, �Okay, but just a couple of 
questions.�
�Great!� the reporter shouted jumping up and down, �First question: Reports 
show that you and Mr. Hibiki had many fights in the past, how did those go?�
�Beat him every time of course. Well, except for this one ti-�
�Great!� the reporter said interrupting Ranma and began to scribble 
something down in his notebook.
�Next question: Would you say that you�re still a better than Mr. Hibiki?�
The immediate response of 'yes' didn�t come out as Ranma looked at the 
little man. He took his time and finally said, �I don�t know.�
�What do you mean you don�t know? You�ve beaten him and he�s the best 
doesn�t that make you the best?� the reporter asked quizzically.
Ranma smiled and said, �No, no it doesn�t.�
�That�s kind of weird,� the befuddled reporter said, scratching his head.
�No, no it isn�t,� Ranma said.


[1] I imagined this kick as being similar to Mirko Crocop�s dreaded left 
high kick. Most awful high kick in combat sports if you ask me.
[2] Sort of a lame reference to �Pride Fighting Championship.� I wanted to 
use �Penultimate Fighting Championship�, but somebody already used that joke 
somewhere else.
[3] A horrible reference to the Nelly song �I am Number One.�
[4] This is loosely based on a real fight between Kevin Randleman and Mirko 
Crocop that happend at the opening round of the 2004 Heavyweight Pride Grand 
Prix. Great fight ending with a brutal knockout.
[5] Daffy Duck said it so it�s probably worth repeating.

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