Subject: [FFML] Re: [The Darkstarr Chronicles] Chapter One: Jessie
From: "Larry F" <lwf58@socal.rr.com>
Date: 2/25/2004, 4:49 PM
To: "'DB Sommer'" <sommer@3rdm.net>, "'LSMcGill'" <lsmcgill@hotmail.com>
CC: <ffml@anifics.com>



The Draconian nodded.  "Yes, Mistress.  I have the information for 
Lombardi's mission, but was directed to only give it to you in 
private."

Once more the fantasies surged to the front of Jessie's mind at the
thought
of having Arika alone, but she fought them down.

This is excessive. Quite repeating yourself in stating Jessie 
is attracted to her.


	Hmm. When I first read this story, it didn't strike me as being
truly excessive. I understood it as reinforcement of the concept that
the attraction was being imposed artificially.



Arika nodded, and stood, pressing the disc on her hip.  Her 
skinsheath 
vanished, revealing it had been entirely holographic, and obviously 
generated by the belt, which then released and was set 
aside.  "Then 
may I offer my mistress entertainment to while away the time?"

wile (I think)


	Nope. "While" is correct. "While" means: 1 : a period of time
especially when short and marked by the occurrence of an action or a
condition : time <stay here for a while>. 2 : the time and effort used
(as in the performance of an action) : trouble <worth your while>. The
saying "while away the time" draws on meaning #2.

	"Wile" means: 1 : a trick or stratagem intended to ensnare or
deceive; also : a beguiling or playful trick. 2 : skill in outwitting :
trickery, guile. The term "wily", which draws on meaning #2, is the most
common use of the word these days.




Jessie leaned back to look at the ceiling, idly twirling 
Arika's curls
with
her fingers.  "Found something one day.  A big ruin under the ice.
Stumbled
across it by sheer happy accident.  When I made inquires 
into salvage 
rights, all of a sudden, I had Darkstarr Industries 
breathing down my
neck.
When I refused to sell, they bought my company out from 
under me, and
tried
to force me to tell them where the ruins were.  That's why 
I faked my
death.
They can't get to the ruins without me, and I'll be damned 
if I'm just
going
to hand them over.  Sooner or later, they'll realize 
they're not going 
to find the place without me.  That's probably why your 
creator wants 
me to play bait.  I can get close to the target by dangling the 
location in
front
of him.  Then, while he thinks I'm taking them to the 
ruins, I simply
direct
him to the pickup point, and extraction gets made.  I 
disappear again 
as Jessie, and no-one knows what happened."

Odds are the ruins will have a role to play in this then


	Hey, Lance... Just realized that I've always forgotten to tell
you that use of a hyphenated "no-one" is incorrect. It's "no one" -- at
least according to Merriam Webster's thesaurus. That's one of your
favorite spelling errors. Your other favorite mistake is getting mixed
up about correct punctuation, but DB has covered most of the errors in
this chapter.





Arika smiled.  "Very intriguing.  I do not have any 
information on the 
EOT other than basic diplomatic protocols and cultural analysis.  
Would it surprise you to learn that Andromeda considers the EOT a

am


	"an"



_My face.  My face and a different gender.  I'm a *he* now. 
 Have to 
get used to it._

Hmm. Interesting detail.


	Yep. He really -is- a male lesbian, isn't he?  ^_-



     Ja mata,
     Larry F

     The Lost Library of Florestica
     http://rakhal.com/florestica/

     La Biblioteca Perdida de Phantasia
     (The Lost Library of Phantasia)
     http://phantasiaca.tripod.com/ 

     Nuke 'Em 'Till They Glow!! The Early Years
     http://nettg.simud.org/



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