Glad to see another chapter of this fun little romp out. I noticed a few
grammar and spelling errors, which I'll point out to help you.
{original:correction}
The young martial artist looked as if he'd gone 20 rounds with Hinako
Ninomiya and had {lose:lost} ever damn one of them.
It had been wild and crazy enough to overwhelm even the most tenacious of
teenage superhuman ass kickers, leaving Ranma tired, hungry, {soar:sore},
and unable to walk under his own power.
"Ranma!" exclaimed{,: } Hotaru rushing to her new husband's side.
"So," Haruka asked as she helped Hotaru set Ranma down in one of the
{chars:chairs}. "When's breakfast?"
Michiru sighed falling into a seat. "{That god: That's good}. If I had to
stand up to cook I would have died."
Haruka sat down next to her female lover and smiled. "Man, I still can't
believe it." {she:She} smiled at Ranma. "I just can't believe it."
"Oh, come on!" exclaimed Haruka, "He's not dead. {he:He} just wasn't used
to keeping up with the two of us, right Michiru-chan?"
"Soup's on," stated Setsuna as she stood up{ : and}left the room to
retrieve their delivery.
Shampoo was too worried about her airen, but great-grandmother had her
doing deliveries when she should {in:by} all rights be looking for Ranma!
The purpled haired Amazon paced back and forth on the steps of the large
Japanese house waiting for the door to open so she could give them the
damn noodle soup{ and,:, and} get back to what was important: finding her
beloved husband!
Shampoo shot up straight, and putting on her biggest smile and in her most
bubbly voice, she said. "You order five beef {ramin:ramen} from
Nekohanten, no?"
Setsuna nodded. "Indeed {it:I} did. {the:The} old woman on the phone said
2,700 yen."
Setsuna's eyes narrowed. "Maybe... what do I get if I tell you{.:?}"
Shampoo smiled. "What you get. {how:How} {bout:'bout} {ramin:ramen} is on
house!"
"So, the {ramin:ramen} is on the house?" asked Setsuna.
"Well you did, how else do I know it{.:?}"
Shampoo nodded and all but thrust the order into Setsuna's arms.
"{Ramin:Ramen} is on house!"
"Flower-Girl," exclaimed the crazed {china:chinese} woman. "You I kill!"
As soon as the soup was placed in front of him, and the hand removed,
Ranma {jump:jumped} into action, eating at {speed:speeds} not achievable
by most mortal men. Mortal women was another story, as Usagi could pace
him any day of the week.
Hotaru smiled and snuggled up next to him, {brining:bringing} slight
{pings:pangs} of jealousy to Setsuna's heart. "Feeling better now?" she asked.
He nodded. "Yeah, Hotaru-chan just great{,:.}" {he:He} looked up to Haruka
and Michiru adding, "But no more threesomes with those two."
"Ranma, {not:now} that's just low."
Setsuna guessed it was more of those strange phantom memories. It was how
she was able to play Shampoo so {easly:easily}.
Haruka sighed loudly. "Fine..." {looking:Looking} to Michiru she grinned,
"I did miss the quality time with Michiru-chan... but I really wanted to
give that girl-form of {you're:yours} a test drive."
Setsuna looked at Haruka and {hook:shook} her head. The woman had no
class. She was surprised someone as eloquent and Michiru could stand her.
"Shameless"
"It's a place I choose out of the phonebook!" stated Hotaru, "Had a
{Kawaii:kawaii} name."
"Oh, what was it called, Hotaru-chan{,:?}" asked Michiru
"Oh, I pointed her in the direction of that Kodachi girl. {got:Got} the
food for free too."
Haruka shrugged. "I say let sleeping dogs {lye:lie}," She grinned and
leered at her husband. "I'm perfectly happy the way things are now..."
"He was serious{.:,}" Haruka deadpanned as she looked at the gypsy wagon
sitting in a small piece of undeveloped land.
Michiru sighed. "So, what now...{:?}"
Setsuna's eyes narrowed. "We {mush:must} be very careful, lest we receive
a curse."
With a slow creak the door opened, and an old woman in gypsy
{dressed:dress} poked her head out and glared at Hotaru.
With a wave the old gypsy woman motioned for the others to follow. The
other members of the married quintuplet filed into the small looking wagon
behind Hotaru and Madam Sophia{:.}
He was right. {One:On} the outside the wagon looked to be about the size
of a large van. On the inside was a cluttered space the size of a studio
apartment.
Sophia sat down at a table in front of a huge rack {off:of} potions. "Now,
what would you like?" she said, her affect making a total 180 as she began
pimping her {wears:wares}. "I can read your fortune, the tarot, love
potions, curse. You name your magical request and {changes:chances} are
Madam Sophia can provide... for a price."
Sophia grinned darkly. "Would Miss Loud-Mouth-Japanese-Girl like an old
Gypsy curse? Try your hand at being a klutz? Maybe make it so you'll never
experience sexual {please:pleasure} ever again? Madam Sophia knows a
{cure:curse} for every occasion. you want a demonstration?"
"Sorry, cannot tell you anything. Crazy fool paid me to give my {:word}
that I would not {:tell} the{'':} the 'Evil Sorcerer Saotome' the secrets
to the potion."
"Not you. If you {where and:were an} evil sorcerer you would not have so
many curses."
"So many curses? {I:I've only got one{?:!}"
"It's a simple task," Sophia grinned. "He only {haves:has} to defeat my
NINJAS!"
The old woman snapped her fingers and the entire room exploded into
motion. Hidden panels {side:slid} to the side, baskets and boxes popped
open, ninja even stepped from behind brooms and hat racks.
Overall, sounds like Ranma is going to have lots more problems in the
future. Keep up with the writing, I look forward to seeing more of this
and Awkward Consequences.
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