Subject: [FFML] [Fanfic] [Azumanga Daioh] The Quare One
From: "Paul Richard Corrigan" <corrig11@pilot.msu.edu>
Date: 5/23/2003, 4:21 PM
To: ffml@anifics.com


There seems to be a bit of a feeding frenzy of Azumanga Daioh fics lately.
Having now seen episodes one through six (and having swept the Raspberry Heaven
category of the ACen Game Show even before then) I think I'd like to try. This
isn't quite as fluffy as the others, I'm afraid. I sympathize with Osaka myself
sometimes.

Thanks to Ukyou Kuonji for introducing me to the series. Comments welcome.

---
The Quare One
a piece of monologue
---
A very short _Azumanga Daioh_ fic by Paul Corrigan
---
_Azumanga Daioh_ devised by Kiyohiko Azuma
---

Tomo calls me Osaka. She wants me to eat takoyaki and okonomiyaki and be funny.
She thinks I am funny but not like that. Funny as in queer but not Tokyo queer.
Osaka queer. Peculiar. Tomo likes to shout. I don't like to shout. I like to
think things. I suppose that makes me queer. People in Tokyo shout a lot. But
then they always stop at pedestrian crossings, even though there's nothing
coming. Or about Chiyo's pigtails. Chiyo has the queerest pigtails you'd see
in a day's walk. I think things like that in class. Not about my lessons, like
I should. I am not good at my lessons, like Chiyo. In Osaka I was no good at
them either. I sat in class thinking things, about something other than my
lessons, or nothing at all. Yukari gets cross at me because she says I'm
spacing out. I wanted to stop in Tokyo but I could not. Yukari is boring except
when she acts peculiar too. But Nyamo is nice even though I stink at PE.

I am Japanese. Tomo said I am Japanese. Then she said Sakaki was American and
Sakaki was embarrassed, and then Yomi said she was Hawaiian. Tomo and Yomi are
very peculiar. There are lots of queer people in Tokyo. Then Yomi said there
were three types of people. Sakaki was one, Yomi was another and me and Chiyo
were a third. I don't mind that. Chiyo is nice. She is ten years old. Then
Tomo--was it?--said perhaps Chiyo would leave my group and join Sakaki's group.
Chiyo did not understand. I don't understand really either. Me and Chiyo are
always together. Sakaki is together with us too. I think Yomi got it wrong and
we're actually in the same group. I like Sakaki. Kaorin likes Sakaki too. Tomo
said to me when Kaorin was not there that Kaorin was Tokyo queer. That was not
very nice. Tomo is a stink.

Sakaki doesn't shout either. At Chiyo's summer house she didn't mind that I
said queer things. About a dolphin being a sea-pig in kanji. Or when I asked
how she got her figure. She was embarrassed but she didn't get cross. I think
Sakaki likes me. Chiyo likes me too. Chiyo is ten but she's very smart so she's
in high school like me. Chiyo wants to go to college in America. Maybe that's
what they meant. Chiyo is Japanese now and then she'll go to America and be
American. Sakaki is American now. Maybe I am American too. When I am older I
should probably go to America instead. Perhaps in America people like me are
not queer. But in America they speak English and I don't speak English. But
that is all right because Sakaki doesn't speak English either. I don't like
English class. Yukari is a boring teacher. Chiyo has the queerest pigtails
you'd see in a day's walk. I never used dialect words like queer until I came
to Tokyo. I mean Osaka queer. Tomo wants me to talk dialect and eat takoyaki
and be funny. I never liked takoyaki until I came to Tokyo.


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