On 15 Aug 2002 at 23:33, Bira wrote:
I liked it quite a lot - at first, I was a bit worried that this might
be a BGC2040 fic, but I was relieved when I saw it wasn't :).
Haven't seen the 2040 series, actually. I keep meaning to get around to it,
but I never seem to have the time.
All in all, I think it was good, but I did notice a few things in the
characterization department. Sylia appears to be a little too
businesslike, and she's not like that all the time. Also, unless this is
way ahead of the chronology shown in the series and Linna has given up
her dream, her future plans would probably still include trying for a
career as a dancer.
Interesting that you mention the Sylila characterization, as somebody else
said that they thought it was just about dead on. I do see your point, though.
The time frame for this, incidentally, is about a year after the last OAV; I'm
drawing some plot points from Crash, but nothing major. As for Linna, that
will be dealt with more in upcoming chapters. Keep in mind that she doesn't
know Aaron too well at this point, and she's not going to spill her innermost
dreams to him over a casual dinner (the restaurant scene is from his POV,
not hers).
What's an ACC :) ? I know ANC stands for "Annoying New Character", but I
haven't read this other acronym before. As for Maedwin, I didn't find
him annoying. You're doing a nice job of setting him up as an antagonist.
ACC is Author Created Character. Thanks for the input, and hopefully I'll
have at least a draft of the second chapter out before too much longer.