Howdy, s'about time I give this C&C business a try, so here's my first attempt.

I can't remember if I posted this here or not... oh
well. Please enjoy, and please comment!

Nope, don't think you ever posted this before.

Wufei 1/2

I think I know where this is headed...

In other words, they're not mine.
[holds composure]
[holds composure]
[loses composure]
IT ISN'T FAAAAIIIIIRRRR!!!!!

It never is... otherwise, I'd be Koshi Rikudo.

I *hate* irony. Karma is *not* fun. And I only hope
my situation is providing humour to the Buddha,
because it definitely is not funny from *this* end.

Heh, I liked this intro.

... and prevent an unnecessary death.

Only to give them a fate worse than death.

"Especially if you do that, sir. You would become an
hermaphrodite when splashed with cold water, then."

Should be <become a hermaphrodite>.

Winner did ask me if I was ashamed of myself - I
believe he was trying to see if I were suffering from
anorexia or some other body-image problem.

Hmm... Justice boy always did look a bit anorexic to me...

I had, you see, become something of a water- and
trouble-magnet. When it started to rain, the first
drop always hit me. If a random volley of shots was
fired off into the darkness, the gun would just happen
to be pointing at me when it was fired. If the
water-pressure was unpredictable, it would make the
tap explode in my face. And if we were covering a
pattern when the OZ forces could take a choice of
which Gundam to attack, they always chose Nataku.

Poor WuFei, hehe... This part was pretty funny.

Luckily, my breasts were not large,

Guess Ranma was unlucky, eh?

"Heya, Wufei! Whatcha - ooh...." His eyes slid over
my chest bindings,

I guess this is sufficient proof that Duo isn't gay... (sorry, couldn't resist!)

We walked to the safehouse's kitchenette, where Yui
had set up his laptop and received our mission data. 
Please do not ask me why he chose the kitchenette. 
When Yui shares his reasons with others, it is only
because he is forced to do so. It eventually becomes
easier to simply accept that there *are* reasons, and
to move on.

Another funny part, heh.

"A mission for you," he
said, in probably the same tone as he would have said,
"Congratulations, you've won the lottery."

This was hilarious for me.

If I didn't know better, I'd say Maxwell thought I
was a girl, was trying to hide it, and had now set
himself up as my protector. And if I was right...
well, I definitely needed another cup of tea.

Very perceptive, Mr. Chang.

I am very, very confused. Do *not* make any cracks,
okay? I get enough from Hiiro already, and he doesn't
even know about this.

Not sure if you like boys or girls? Heh.

So I came barging in....

All together now: Du~uo is an i~idiot....

Du~uo is an i~idiot! What? You said "All together now"!

And some people say that we have anger issues.

Got a chuckle from this one too.

Life is not
fair - especially when it is a good day to die and it
appears that you're not going to be allowed to.

This part was nicely written.

"It's a *girl*!"

"One of the Gundam pilots is a *girl*?"

"You idiots, it's a guy in drag! Shoot him!"

But I hadn't, and I knew it, and *they* knew it. The
closest one to me reached out and brushed a clammy
fingertip over my chest. With a quick reach-and-grip,
I broke his hand and went for his gun.

"Is that a gun in your pocket?"

"..."

"Ewww!"

"*Nobody* touches *my* girl."

Uh oh, big misunderstanding...

"NO!" I denied vehemently. "*I* don't change, and I
am definitely *not* a girl! My body sometimes becomes
female - but it's me, and I am a *man*!"

He/She's in denial.

"Oh, don't say *that*," Duo drawled. "I'm not the
least bit innocent... any more."

The page glanced at us, his eyes widening, as I gave
him my blankest stare. He blushed, and said, "Um...
well... good night, sirs!" and fled.

Perverted, but hilarious, heh.

We had been caught on surveillance cameras, of
course. And, of course, the incident was circulated
among OZ bases and to other OZ personnel. And their
family and friends. And *their* family and
friends....

Hehe.

2. An hermaphrodite, for those who do not know, is a

Same as earlier, <a hermaphrodite>.

By the way, I noticed you using "Hiiro" throughout the story, I believe the official Bandai spelling of his name is "Heero". Just thought I'd point that out.

I thought the 3 parts were very nicely written. No mistakes besides the <an/a hermaphrodite> thing and it was funny all the way through, for me anyways. I liked how you were writing from the first-person perspective, I haven't read too many fics written like that, and you kept it consistent and well-written up till now. I'd definitely enjoy reading more of this and I'm looking forward to it. Hope this was helpful in some way.



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