Subject: [FFML] Re: [C&C] [Ranma/Tenchi/Sailor Moon] Process of Elimination -- Chapter Twelve B
From: David Smith
Date: 3/8/2002, 4:50 PM
To: FFML


Realized chapter 11 was still in my To Read folder, so here's a bunch of
corrections for both chapters.

-- Best regards, David mailto:dsmith@datasync.com "Keep on moving, I guess." Ranma struggled to stand, but the younger-looking redhead -- the one with shorter hair, thought it was --- thought -> though still quite long -- made a noise in her sleep, and tightened her grip Blinking, the Galaxy Police office stared at the depressed 'rescue' button, and frowned. "It didn't work?" office -> officer Ranma could manage himself well enough, and Yakumo -- according to Yosho -- was _more_ that formidable against the reaver, though Yosho had --- that -> than been reluctant to go into details about Yakumo's abilities. While her original plan had been to offer a help allow Ranma to glow --- offer a help allow Ranma -> offer help to allow Ranma --- to glow -> to grow close to Washuu, she could see that there was little she could truly do to influence them. Washuu was more knowledgeable than Cologne had given her credit, and as far as Cologne could tell, Ranma happily discarded all pretenses of romantic inclinations in favor of fighting reavers. Nodding, Ranma explained, "He says tells me that he wants some --- says tells me -- {duplication} things to add to himself before he does it. He wants to make come kind of crystal thing to make it easier for him to do, and he needs to eat --- to do, -> {to do what?} special stuff to get the things he wants." *12* His men fell into ranks in the courtyard, Ranma's cohorts and the girls that followed him to one side. Norris shifted uncomfortably, looking around, and asked, "Where's Miss Hakubi?" Hakubi -> Habuki Norris nodded, frowning thoughtfully. "Understood. Ray, set up a communications center with the radio set we brought with us, Eric, see if you can find that lodge where our troops can bunk down. Pavel, I want you to set up a shift rotation so that we have a good spread of battle-ready Marines at all times." The three Marines nodded, saluting before dashing off to do as instructed. "The rest of you, at ease until Miss Hakubi or Ranma return, and be sure to respect the local customs Hakubi -> Habuki here. We have to work with these women, and pissing them off isn't a good way to do that. Am I clear?" Norris grinned, managing to reduce to expression to merely a pleased --- to expression -> the expression smile as he nodded again at the old woman. She snorted, motioning him to enter the meeting lodge. Across the palace of Jurai, servants scurried about madly -- there was much to be done before Tenchi and the Home Fleet jumped again to Earth. For his part, the emperor lay, across the foot of the massive bed --- lay, across -> lay across in his chamber, a day of seemingly endless meetings finally finished and over with. "Dunno," the man said, shaking his head. "We gotta destroy my ship, and soon. I got my Light Haw Wings constraining the plasma storm, but I --- Haw -> Hawk can't hold them up for long." The creature ignored him, trundling forward to snap up the crystal in its mandibles as it lay on the ground, and then drew closer. Extending one hand before him, as though he could push the creature away, the man scowled. "Promises are promises, and harming me know would --- me know -> me now make your mistress... angry." Ranma turned to regard the woman in the pristine white, her face marred with a vicious cut beneath one eye, slow trickles off blood --- off -> of working their way across her face. She moved slowly, cautiously. As though she had worse hurts that she refused to show. "I remember you," he mumbled, wishing he could banish the muzzy, thick feelings that suffused his head. "Hurt, for me?" "She returned a few days later, claiming that the climb was impossible," Cologne said. "And for many months, the contest to prove who the strongest warrior was to see who could best that mountain." --- who the -> who was the "Yeah," Ranma answered, grinning. "If _making_ people to do what you --- people to do -> people do want is the answer, how come it's not working?" "You're aboard an orbital platform, Ranma-dono." The speaker came into his sight, peering down at him... apprehensively. He squinted, blinking. Her hair was darker than Sasami's, and slightly than --- slightly than -> slightly {???} than Tsunami's, but there was some undeniable feature of her that was _both_. "Tsunami?" he ventured, struggling to a sitting position. She nodded, hugging him tightly, and relaxing. "It's been so horribly, Ranma-dono," she murmured. "I was.... I was so afraid you'd --- horribly -> horrible reject me right away." Washuu relaxed slightly, allowing her arms to hang at her sides. "Normally you're supposed to deny that what the woman ever saw happened." --- ever saw -> saw ever "Sure thing, Fearless Leader," Ryu grumbled, unfurling the bolt of cloth at his wait about himself, and vanishing from sight. His voice --- his wait -> his waist called out, disembodied, a moment later. "Where'd you get so good at this, anyway?" The three women stopped abruptly, glowing at him. Ryu merely flashed --- glowing -> glowering them a grin, waiting for Ryouga and the others to catch up. They did, Ray, Makoto, and her friends slightly winded, everyone else unaffected by the exertion. "Got something ugly about thirty meters that way, Fearless Leader," Ryu said, jerking his thumb over his shoulder. "Don't know why they're just sitting around, but that's what's going on." .---Anime/Manga Fanfiction Mailing List----. | Administrators - ffml-admins@anifics.com | | Unsubscribing - ffml-request@anifics.com | | Put 'unsubscribe' in the subject | `---- http://ffml.anifics.com/faq.txt -----'