tangent wrote:
you've got some serious formatting problems here. They're going
to make this fic difficult to read if they aren't solved somehow.
Actually, there's only two things wrong with the formatting... One is
that it isn't line-wrapped -- which doesn't bother me, since my browser
line wraps for me if I ask it to. The other, more serious thing, is
that all of the quotes were encoded as html-like &#blah; thingies, which
is majorly annoying.
There's some minor problems with the plot... like, why didn't everyone
jump in and say, "I've heard of him!" when Ranma's name was mentioned,
and for that matter, where was Ranma when all of the various DB and DBZ
stuff was happening [especially the tournaments]. Also, Hiroshi never
seemed interested in the Art in canon R.5... if he decided to take it up
when Ranma arrived, he'd have become a much different person early on...
which isn't necessarily *bad*, but that's a third change [maybe the ball
fell back in when it bounced off the ceiling?]. Also, for Roshi to be
Hiroshi, that makes it a fusion, not a crossover.
Oh, and how does a ball, travelling through X many meters of water,
bounce off the bottom and come flying back up? Water is significantly
more viscous than air, ya know. And even it is possible to throw it
that hard, it's gonna make a gargantuan splash! Surely some of the
observers are going to be a 'tad' upset, nu?