No Need for Sailor Scouts
part 3
by
Doug Whiddon
The day after the malt shop attack Tenchi moved out of
the shrine and into his own apartment. It was a one bedroom
with a kitchenete, bedroom, bathroom and living room.
"This is nice." Rei looked around apreciativly. "I was
expecting one of those little one room places where the whole
building shares a bathroom and you have to go to the public
baths."
Tenchi stopped what he was doing and thought for a
second. "You read Maison Ikoku, right?"
Rei nodded. "Right up to the end."
^�My dad runs his own archtechtural firm, he makes
more than enough for a decent apartment.^� Not to mention the
two tons of gold Azusa sent us. Tenchi broke down the box he
had emptied and slid it under the bed with the others, they
would be used again when he left.
There was a knock at the door.
^�I^�ll get it, it^�s probably the girls.^� Rei volunteered.
Tenchi moved on to the next box.
Rei answered the door. ^�Hello?^�
^�Hello,.... Is.. Lord Tenchi here?^�
Tenchi^�s ears perked up. She couldn^�t be here. THEY
couldn^�t be here. He jumped up and ran to the door. He got
there just in time to see Ryoko hoist Rei up by the colar. ^�What
have you done with my Tenchi, you hussy!^�
^�RYOKO! Put her down.^� Tenchi yelled.
Rei hit the floor with a thump. She jumped up and was
in Ryoko^�s face in a second. ^�What^�s the big idea you...^�
Tenchi grabbed her arms before whe could take a
swing. ^�I^�d let it go if I were you. You don^�t want to get into a
fight with her.^�
Rei fumed, but dropped her arms to her sides.
Ayeka, who had been a silent observer up until now,
took the moment to interupt. ^�Tenchi, who is this young
woman?^� She asked, and more quietly, ^�And what is she doing
in your apartment?^�
^�Oh, this is Rei Hino. Her grandfather is a priest at a
local shrine, he^�s a friend of Granpa and let me stay with them
until my apartment was ready.^� He turned back to Ayeka and
Ryoko. ^�What are you two doing here?^�
Ayeka^�s face dropped. ^�Are you... unhappy... to see us
here?^�
Tenchi sighed. ^�Of course not, it^�s just a little
unexpected.^� And scary, he added to himself. ^�I thought Washu
was keeping you two away from Tokyo.^�
Ryoko and Ayeka steped aside to reveal Washu
standing behind them.
^�That^�s LITTLE Washu, Remember?^�
next to Washu was Sasami,with Ryo-ohki perched on
her head, and behind them was Mihoshi.
^�Hi!^� They said in unison. Ryo-ohki Miyad her ^�hello^�
Tenchi stood, stunned, in the doorway. ^�How did you
get here?^�
^�Gee, Tenchi, you^�d think you weren^�t happy to see
us.^� Washu grinned. ^�Ryo-ohki brought us. We thought you
could use some help moving in.^�
^�And we brought snacks!^� Mihoshi held up a sack in
each hand.
Tenchi sighed. ^�All right, come on in.^�
Everyone came in and sat around the table. Tenchi
introduced everyone to Rei. Ayeka and Sasami he said where
his cousins, Washu and her daughter Ryoko rented rooms from
his father at home, and Mihoshi was a friend.
Ayeka sat down between Tenchi and Rei. Ryoko sat
down on the other side of Tenchi and everyone else sat on the
oposite side of the table. Mihoshi overturned the sacks onto the
table, spilling out packets of cookies, chips, cans of tea and
soda and other junk food. Ayeka and Ryoko both reached for
the same pack of cookies and the fight was on.
^�Let go!^�
^�These cookies are mine, cookie hog!^�
^�Who are a you calling a cookie hog!?^�
And so on... until the bag tore knocking each down and
spilling choclate chip cookies all over the table.
Rei looked at Tenchi, ^�Are they always like this?^�
Tenchi nodded, ^�And sometimes worse.^�
The doorbell range again. ^�I^�ll get it,^� Tenchi said.
Makoto, Ami, Minako, Usagi, and Mamoru where at
the door, Makoto was carrying two bakery boxes. Tenchi
smiled, ^�Come on in and meet my friends.^�
Tenchi returned to the table with the newcomers in tow.
Washu piped up, ^�Well, if it isn^�t the Sailor Scouts.^�
Rei choked on her Tea. Ayeka pat her on the back to
help her clear her throat. No one said anything. Makoto broke
the silence, ^�You told!!^� She yelled at Tenchi.
^�Calm down, I didn^�t say anything!^�
^�Then how did she know?^� Minako asked.
^�I^�m the greatest genius in the universe, that^�s how I
knew.^�
The scouts, plus Mamoru and two cats stared at
Washu. ^�Huh?^� was there colective response.
Tenchi sighed. ^�All right, let^�s try this again.^� He
motioned towards the scouts. ^�Sailor scouts, meet Washu,
she^�s a multithousand year old scientest from another planet.^�
He pointed to Washu. He moved down the line. ^�And this is her
daughter, the space pirate Ryoko. Next we have Ayeka and
Sasami, princesses from the planet Jurai. And that^�s Ryo-ohki
who is actually a spaceship. And, last, Mihoshi is a Galaxy
Police officer assigned to patrol the solar system.^� Tenchi took
a deep breath and waited for everything to settle in. He was
glad they had left Myuka at home, she would have been difficult
to explain.
Ami started, ^�Multithousand year old scientest?^�
Minako followed, ^�Space pirate?^�
Makoto, ^�Galaxy Police?^�
Usagi, ^�Princesses?^�
There was a brief series of nods from the girls on
tenchi^�s side. Then a lot of uncomfortable silence, which was
broken by a talking cat.
^�Did you say ^�the Planet Jurai^�?^�
Tenchi looked around for whoever had asked the
question. His gaze setteled on the black cat with the crescent
moon. Luna stared back. ^�Well?^�
Tenchi looked at Washu. ^�Did that cat just talk?^�
Washu nodded. ^�Aperently.^�
Tenchi looked back at Luna. Tenchi was part alien, he
lived with 6 alien women, he had been to several different
planets, fought alien mad men and faced intergalactic mad
scientests, and then there where the bad days.... But a talking
cat was strange, even by his standards.
^�Uhm, yes I did say Jurai. Have you heard of it?^�
Tenchi felt stupid talking to a cat.
^�I^�ve heard the name mentioned, but not in the last Ten
thousand years.^�
^�You^�re ten thousand years old?^�
^�Not quite, but I was alive ten thousand years ago.^�
^�Okay... what about Jurai?^�
^�Are you from there?^�
^�No, I^�m from Yokohama. My great grandfather is the
Emperor of Jurai.^� Tenchi looked back at the rest of the room.
Ayeka was talking to Usagi, they seemed to be getting along.
Sasami was talking to Makoto, probably trading cooking
secrets. Minako was interogating Mihoshi and Ami was chatting
with Washu. ^�If you want to know about Jurai you should ask
Washu.^�
Luna walked away of in Washu^�s general direction,
much to Tenchi^�s relief.
While Luna was talking to Tenchi Artemis was having a
less than enlightening conversation with Ryo-ohki. Artemis was
a very old cat and had learned seveleral different dialects of cat,
as well as Japanese, and a host of other Human languages; but
so far he had only gotten the word ^�miya^� out of her, and wasn^�t
clear on the meaning. Ryo-ohki meanwhile was enjoying her
tenth carrot, not typically considered a cat food, but then again,
he wasn^�t sure exactly what Ryo-ohki was. That was when
Luna showed up.
^�Does she have any usefull information?^� Luna asked.
^�No, we seem to have a language barriar. Shes only
interested in carrots^�
Luna sighed. ^�No use sticking around here then.^�
Tenchi popped the top on a can of soda. He surveyed
the room. It had now been two hours since the girls had arrived
ant there was no property damage. Tenchi was worried, the
peace couldn^�t last. It never did.
^�Myuka? Who^�s that?^�
Tenchi^�s ears perked up. Minako had asked Mihoshi
that. Tenchi wondered how the conversation had gotten around
to her, but more than that he was terrified about how Mihoshi
might answer.
^�Oh, she^�s Tenchi^�s daughter.^�
No matter how crowded a room or how loud the music
there are always brief seconds of silence, and ususally, in those
brief seconds a single voice can be heard by everyone saying
something. Usually it^�s something humiliating, and not always
just to the speaker. Mihoshi^�s words fell into one of those
silences. The words ^�Tenchi^�s daughter^� seemed to hang in the
air over Tenchi^�s head like a huge bomb labled ^�acme^� the fuse
dwindeling down.
^�YOU HAVE A DAUGHTER!?^� The fuse blew, in the
form of Rei.
^�I am NOT jelous.^�
^�Rei it took all four of us to pull you off of Tenchi after
that blonde told you he had a daughter.^�
^�I am not jelous.^�
Serena sighed.
There was a knock on the door, then it opened and
Ami poked her head in. ^�Has she calmed down?^�
^�YES^� Rei hissed. She slammed the door open and
stormed over to Tenchi. The inflamed brunette seemed about to
boil. ^�You got some girl pregnant, didn^�t you?^�
^�No, I didn^�t.^�
^�Then how do you have a daughter?^�
Tenchi explained. He told them the whole story about
Myuka and Yuzuha.
The sailor scouts and the cats stared at him, stunned.
Finally, Minako broke the silence. ^�Damn.^�
The rest of the girls nodded in a greement.
^�So, this Yuzuha wanted to kill you because your
grandfather was nice to her?^� Ami asked.
^�Something like that. I think her logic was a little
warped.^�
^�You have a daughter, but your still a virgin? What are
the odds on that happening twice?^� Makoto whispered the
second sentence to herself with a giggle.
Usagi choked on her tea.
^�He doesn^�t have to be, I^�m ready when he wants me.^�
Ryoko^�s statement resulted in a roomwide face-fault
and an enraged princess launching into a screaming fit which
included numerous unprintables.
Awhile later Washu announced that it was time for them
to leave, it was a school night after all. Tenchi walked them to
the door, the scouts left as well, it was late and they all wanted
to see Ryo-ohki change into a spaceship. Tenchi watched as
the crowd walked to the stairs at the end of the building and
disapeared. With a smile, Tenchi closed the door; his smile
disapeared when his eyes fell on the huge mess they had left
behind.
******************
Usagi took the steps to Rei^�s shrine two at a time, the
latest issue of her favorite manga in hand.
Rei was sweeping one of the steps about halfway up the
steps. Usagi skidded to a halt on the step imediatly below her.
^�Hey Rei, check it out!^� She waved the manga in Rei^�s
face.
Rei continued to sweep, oblivious to Usagi^�s presence.
^�Rei? REI!^� Usagi^�s face swelled up like a baloon.
Rei returned from her million mile trip. ^�Gahhh!^� Rei fell
back on the steps. ^�DON^�T DO THAT!^�
Usagi covered her mouth and laughed softly. ^�So, what
where you thinking about? Hm?^�
^�Tenchi said his grandfather was a prince, wouldn^�t that
make HIM a prince too?^�
Usagi nodded, ^�I think so. So what?^�
^�Every prince needs a princess, doesn^�t he?^�
Usagi sighed, she^�s got it bad. ^�If you really want to go
after him your facing some serious competition.^�
Rei thought about the pirate and the princess. ^�Your
right, but still, it might be worth it. And, I^�m here, the^�re in
Yokohama.^�
^�That^�s right, you have the home field advantage.^�
Serena adopted her best Yoda pose, ^�You must use it wisely.^�
^�Huh?^�
^�Ask him out stupid!^�
^�Who are you calling stupid!?^�
It was quite in Tenchi^�s apartment, he sat at his desk
doing homework. There where no disturbances, no girls
fighting, no Sasami cooking dinner, no washu in her lab, no
Mihoshi bugging her.
Tenchi completed his math homework and closed the
book, he put down his pencil and scooted back from the desk,
he took a deep breath. ^�IT^�S TOO DAMN QUITE!^�
The noise of his scream faded to quickly to be of any
help. Tenchi decided to turn on the TV in the next room to
provide a little background noise. The noise helped, Tenchi was
able to finish his homework in a reasonable amount of time.
Afterwards he sat down to watch some TV and just let
his mind rest; but he found himself unable to just relax. He kept
thinking about Rei. She reminded him of Ayeka and Ryoko; she
had Ayeka^�s poise and grace, a real princess; and she had
Ryoko^�s fiery spirit, things where never dull around her. Tenchi
contemplated calling her, asking her out, something, anything,
just to hear her voice, see her again.
Tenchi decided that he would call her, he was
prevented from doing so, however, when there was a knock on
the door.
When Rei had finished sweeping the shrine and finished
the rest of her chores she had come to a descision about
Tenchi; she was attracted to him, which only came as a surprise
to her- and she was going to do something about it. Which was
what brought her to his door.
Tenchi^�s alarm rang. Rei knocked if off the nightstand
onto the floor...
^�Ow!^� Where it landed on Tenchi^�s head.
Tenchi sat up, rubbing his head. He looked at the clock.
^�Gaaah! I^�m gonna be late for school.^� Tenchi shot up
off the floor and collided with Rei, who was getting out of his
bed. They both wound up on the floor in a tangle of sheets,
which, under the laws of all things slapstick, meant that
someone had to see them
^�Teeennnchi...^�
Tenchi^�s ears heard the voice, but his brain swore it
wasn^�t possible, until Ryoko phased through the door and
stopped dead in her tracks. The scene before her needed no
explinations. Tenchi was wearing only his boxer shorts, and the
Sailor Slut, as Ryoko immediatly tagged her, was wearing
panties and one of his shirts, and they where tangled up in
bedsheets on the floor.
A headline flashed through Tenchi^�s mind ^�Two dead in
mysterious explosion^�
Ryoko screamed.
Rei screamed.
Tenchi, not wanting to be left out ,screamed.
Rei made a mad dash for the bathroom, grabbing her
clothes along the way. Ryoko lunged for Tenchi. Tenchi prayed
for a black hole to open up and suck him in.
Ryoko grabbed Tenchi and lifted him up. ^�Tell me that
this isn^�t what it looks like!^�
^�This isn^�t what it looks like!^� Tenchi^�s brain had
absolutly no part in forming that response, it was purely survival
instinct.
^�Then what is it?^�
^�We stayed up until two a.m. talking and then it was
raining and I don^�t have an umberala so she stayed the night, I
slept on the floor.^�
Ryoko dropped Tenchi. ^�Okay. I should have known
you^�d never sleep with that scrawny girl when you have me.^�
What Ryoko did next has often been referred to as a
Glomp. To Rei, emerging from the bathroom, it was merely a
gross display of loose morals; which Ayeka would have been in
complete agreement with. She wrapped her arms around him
and rubbed herself up against him, and nibbled on his ear.
^�Owww! Ryoko, that hurts!^�
^�Sorry.^�
Rei^�s eye twiched.
^�What are you doing here? I thought Washu was
keeping you out of Tokyo.^�
^�Mihoshi broke the machine and until Washu fixes it I^�m
not leaving your side.^�
^�Ryoko I have to go to school.^�
^�I^�ll go with you.^�
^�No you won^�t! I^�ll get in trouble!^�
^�Excuse me.^�
Tenchi and Ryoko looked up at Rei.
Rei smiled at Tenchi, a forced smile, not a geniun one.
^�I really must be going now.^� And then she was gone.
Rei headed back to the shrine, her school was haveing
a day off for repairs so she didn^�t have to hurry.
Tenchi was cute, she admitted that, he was nice as well.
She had learned a lot about him last night, they had much in
common. They had both lost their mothers at a young age, they
where both grandchildren of shrine keepers. Tenchi^�s father
was better than hers though, at least he didn^�t send his only
child off to live with a grandparent and then promptly forget she
existed.
The loose thoughts about her life in general and Tenchi
specifically kept Rei^�s attention instead of where she was going.
Rei bumped into someone and looked up to apologize. She had
only a brief glance of a black chitinous form before the world
went dark.
************
a bit of history
************
12,000 years ago a lesser house of the Jurai Star, called the
house of Serenity acquired colonization rights to the planets that
make up the solar system. Only the Earth was inhabitable, but in
order to keep their claim all the planets had to have at least a
token population. So they built domed cities on each world.
They called their new holding the Silver Kingdom. The kingdom
only lasted for a thousand years before falling to civil war.
That^�s why it^�s called the ^�Silver Millennium.^� The last of the
matriarchal rulers of the Silver Kingdom was named Serenity.
Funaho was the oldest daughter of the rulers of the Earth.
Which, in a round-about-way, makes Tenchi Mamoru^�s cousin.
*******************************************
omne ignotum pro magnifico
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