seems, Ranma and Akane had run off together. But that wasn't the end
Mr. Connor, it sounds a little awkward to have a present-tense verb
smack-dab in the middle of a past-tense sentence... ^^;
their dead masters for years. There was no doubt in her mind that
Konatsu would be such a dog, if he were a dog.
::laughs::
"Now I've found you, Saotome! Now you will face my darling Shampoo's
wrath! Now that she finally knows what a dishonourable rat you are...
She'll have no mercy on you! Come on, will you!"
Wouldn't Mousse be happy that he can have Shampoo now? ^^; Unless she's
giving him hell about it...
Konatsu watched the behaviour of the long-haired, Chinese robed youth
Is that Chinese-robed, as in wearing a Chinese robe, or Chinese, robed
youth, as in a Chinese youth who's wearing robes of some kind, Mr. Connor?
^^;
"Indeed I am," the youth replied dramatically. "And now that I've
found him, he shall pay for hurting my darling Shampoo!"
9_9;;
"Now look at it from my perspective. I love a woman above all else.
Unfortunately, she loved Ranma Saotome. Now that the pusillanimous
Wouldn't it be 'loves'? Unless Shampoo doesn't love him, anymore...
Uh, 'pusillanimous...' ^^;;; ::searches frantically for dictionary::
.. ^o^ Wow, for once something is actually in my dictionary, and the
definition is actually understandable! >:} Now THERE'S a nice word to
use to insult somebody; the odds of them knowing the definition is very
very low.
cur has run off with Akane Tendou, my darling is inconsolable! If I
can bring him back to her, and she can make him pay for his actions,
she will be forever grateful to me!"
Oh, so that's his plot, eh? It's just about skewed enough for Mousse, I
guess. ^_^
telephone pole," he said, obvoiusly disappointed.
^_^ I believe someone like you could notice the error in the above
sentence fragment.
"Well, I'm looking for Ranma Saotome too. If I find him, I'll bring
him to you after Ukyou-sama is done with him. How about that?"
Would it be, "Ranma Saotome, too"? That seems to be the way my teacher
taught us to set 'too' off... ^^;
in and out, dodging a few recklessly aimed blows. Finally, he managed
to latch onto a piece of clothing that didn't give when pulled on.
::grin:: Is it that super-strong underwear?
had no chance. She tripped on a tree root, piled head first into the
Would you possibly consider "plowed" as a substitute for 'piled,' Mr.
Connor? ^^;
Konatsu nodded, and continued to hold Ranma up off the floor -- by his
underwear.
I'm SO good. *^_^*
the kind of man that she thought Ranma was. He still had
Do you think adding 'had' after 'she' would make things a little clearer?
Since most of the fic is written in past tense, and Ukyou doesn't
presently think that about Ranma, 'she had thought' would make it clearer
for the reader, I think... ^^;;
face, and a frisson to her body. She turned to her grille and started
'Frisson'... ::dictionary:: Not a lot of people have the kind of
vocabulary you have, Mr. Connor... ::contemplates her current choice of
friends over E-mail:: I take it back... -_- Well, that word's not in my
dictionary. ^^;
conditions. Not to mention that he didn't really want to think about
the permanent damage this may have caused.
::snickers::
[Author's Notes: I may be the author of this, but even I'm not exactly
sure
what I've wrought. It seems to border on spamfic territory if you ask
me.
Your comments are welcome; they might just help me understand it better.
:]
Well, I suppose I would have to know what a spamfic is to know if this is
like one, but I thought it was very charmingly written... ^_^; Thanks
for the pleasure and entertainment, Mr. Connor.
Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and
can't,
and the other half who have nothing to say and keep on saying it.
I seem to have multiple personalities, in that case... ^^; Well, sorry
to have bothered you.
Nibun