Hi,
I recently noticed that the stories I'm working on are much too serious,
even with all the stupid jokes which no-one understands but I put in
anyway. ^_^ So, I'm happy to present you my new pet project - a
Ranma 1/2 and an I Dream of Jeannie fusion! I fused them, and I fused
them good! ^_^
Private and public C&C will be welcomed with open arms. Also, if anyone
had actually attempted something like this before, please tell me so I
can steal their ideas! Err, I meant tell me so that I'd be able to
research those fics properly...
Disclaimer time:
Rumiko Takahashi, Shogagukan, Kitty and Viz Communications own Ranma
1/2. Columbia Pictures Television and Sidney Sheldon own I Dream of
Jeannie.
Corwin (ely7@inter.net.il or corwin@virtuallyjeannie.com)
http://lavender.fortunecity.com/friday/573/anime.html
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My Master, the Martial Artist
Prologue
This was a dream come true! Right in front of his eyes, a dog was turned
into a human boy. Finally, he could rid himself of his curse, once and
for all, and become a full man once again!
The bucket of cold water thrown on him by his two so-called friends,
Hiroshi and Daisuke, ruined the moment for Ranma. Their words, "Don't be
stupid Ranma; Yeah, we like you just the way you are," were an even
bigger turn-off.
Ignoring the murmur of agreement going through the boys in the crowd
surrounding them, Ranma said "Thanks a lot, guys," sarcastically.
Akane, who was more skeptic of Shampoo's generous nature, decided to ask
her the price for the instant nannichuan powder in the meanwhile.
"But you're not just going to give it to him, right?"
"Of course, it no is free," Shampoo replied, turning her head away and
smiling. Taking Ranma's hands, she exclaimed happily: "You date with
Shampoo!"
Looking at her excitedly, Ranma instantly replied "Anything", which
elicited a growl of "RANMA!" from Akane.
"Now, now, Akane, it's only a date," Soun tried to calm his daughter.
'If Ranma becomes a full man again, nothing will prevent him from
marrying Akane! Oh, happy day!'
His statement didn't have the desired effect, although this might have
had something to do with Shampoo sticking her tongue out to Akane.
Hopping on her bycicle, the Chinese girl turned around to Ranma and
said: "Okay, see you this Saturday. Bye now!" before creating a new exit
through a gym wall.
Ranma waved at her happily, mentally doing a victory dance. 'Never gonna
be a girl again! Never gonna be a girl again!"
"This... Saturday...?" Soun asked, breaking Ranma's train of thought.
'Fight the Dojo Destroyer with Akane or get cured. Fight, or get
cured...' Ranma weighed her options in her head. "Well, sorry, pal,
but..." Ranma started saying to Akane, while smiling and rubbing the
back of her head, before being cut off.
"Oh, it's quite all right," Akane replied, matching Ranma's smile. 'I'm
a martial artist too! I can handle this on my own!'
"You said it!" Ranma exclaimed happily, patting Akane on her right
shoulder. "Your brute strength should be more than enough to beat up
some dumb Dojo Destroyer!"
In her extasy, Ranma didn't notice Akane's expression change into one of
rage. With a shout of "YOU MEAN THIS!?" she uppercuted her fiance into
Low Earth Orbit.
Before she became a twinkle in the sky, Ranma could be heard shouting
"Yep! That's it!"
Ignoring the idiotic comments of Ranma's friends, Akane fumed silently.
'Now, even if he begs me... I'm going to do this on my own!' she thought
angrily.
* * *
While Akane's anger was boiling, fueling her determination to win the
fight on her own to show Ranma and everyone else that she didn't need
any help, Ranma was still sailing through the skies.
'Wow, the Earth is so beautiful from up here,' the pigtailed martial
artist thought, admiring the view underneath her. 'Hmm, usually I've
already landed in some lake by this time... Akane must've been really
mad...'
After a few more minutes of flight, Ranma sighed and spoke dejectedly
"An ocean. Figures."
Half an hour later, Ranma came to the realization that she was slowly
starting to lose altitude. "If I have to swim back to Japan once again
because of this, I'm gonna be very angry at that macho chick!" she
swore, not in the mood for a long swim to shore in her girl form.
A couple of minutes afterwards, an island appeared on the horizon.
"Looks like I'm heading over there," Ranma said to herself out loud.
As her re-entry speed picked up, the redhead realized that this was
going to hurt. A lot.
A cry of 'Jeez, how uncuuuute!' rang out through the peaceful skies, as
a small comet made its way to the island coast.
* * *
Ranma dug herself out of the sand, clutching her head. 'Man, what a
landing! I think I managed to redefine the concept of pain...'
Looking around, she discovered that she was on some island in the
Pacific, if the palm trees all around were any indication.
"Of course, I'm lost on a deserted island in the middle of an ocean!"
Ranma shouted, spooking the birds in the tropical forest nearby. "Just
my luck..."
'Oh, well, at least I know now that I've got myself food so I don't
starve,' she thought, analyzing her situation. 'That's good ta know,
since otherwise I'd hafta pick a direction at random an' swim there.'
A droplet of water that somehow remained on Ranma throughout her recent
ordeal chose that moment to fall from her pigtail. 'Hmm, that reminds
me. Water's much more important in these situations. I better check
around for a well, or an underground spring or something.'
Twenty minutes later...
Ranma's searched had turned up nothing of interest, and he was about to
give up when he discovered an ornamental bottle half-burried under the
sand.
'Hey, there might some water in it for me drink!' Ranma thought giddily.
Although he had been holding his thurst at bay, the relentless sun and
the strenous workout he had trying to locate a source of drinkable water
were already starting to take their toll. 'At least the sea water was
warm enough to change me back...' he thought, trying to look at the
glass as half-full, albeit without much success.
Pulling out the cork, Ranma upturned the bottle and opened his mouth,
hoping that this hadn't been yet another wild goose chase. Closing his
eyes in expectation, he was exhilirated to feel something wet brush
against his lips. That exhiliration turned into confusion, as the
promissed liquid didn't hit his throat like he had expected.
Opening his eyes to locate the problem, Ranma froze in his place. The
reason for that was probably the foreign woman kissing him. Myabe it
also had something to do with the fact that the woman was floating in
mid-air, or that the lower end of her legs were in fact smoke, still
pouring out of the aforementioned ornamental bottle.
* * *
"Wha? W-Who are you?" Ranma asked in a shaky voice, backing away from
the scimpily clad girl, once he regained his senses.
Jeannie, having fully materialized by then, clasped her hands above her
head and bowed before him.
"Your every wish is my command, Master," she said in ancient Arabic.
"Huh? Can't you speak Japanese or something?" Ranma asked, confused.
What was that language the girl had just used, English?
"Thank you for rescuing me, Master!" Jeannie exclaimed happily in
Japanese, having granted the strangely worded wish - her Master's first
one! "Two thousand years I've been trapped in that accursed bottle!"
"Um... you're welcome?"
"Thou art most handsome when flustared, Master!" Jeannie giggled in
response.
Ranma had a faraway look on his face for a moment. Shaking his head, he
wondered 'Why the heck did I just think of Kuno in a situation like
this?!' Breaking out of his stupor, he realized something.
"Hey, since I rescued you an' all... does that mean I get a wish?"
"Of course, Master! I am yours to command!" Jeannie replied happily.
"Woo-hoo! I know just the thing to wish for..." Taking a pose, Ranma
said: "I wish I had all the food I could eat! Oh, that and a bottle of
coke."
Crossing her hands in front of her chest, Jeannie blinked, making a
table of various exotic food items appear before Ranma, with the
especially requested bottle of Coca Cola standing proudly in its center.
Tears of joy sprang out of the starving martial artist's eyes, as he
launched himself at the free food, putting the ancient Amazon Amaguriken
technique to shame.
Pausing in mid-bite, Ranma turned his head to see that Jeannie hadn't
moved from her place in the meanwhile.
"Aren't you gonna eat too?" he asked of the djinni. Sure, he didn't like
to share food, but she _was_ the one who made it appear in the first
place...
"No, Master. The food is yours," she answered, lowering her head.
"No, I insist!" Ranma exclaimed, putting up a happy front. Gritting his
teeth, he added: "And if we run out of it, you can always blink some
more or whatever, right?"
"Thou art correct, Master!" Jeannie replied, blinking her eyes and
teleporting herself by Ranma's side. Taking a few grapes, she began
feeding him, taking a few for herself as well. After all, djinn didn't
really need food or even air to sustain themselves. 'Still, it was nice
of him to have offered,' she thought happily, smiling.
The food was gone in record time, and Ranma lay on his back, with his
head resting in Jeannie's lap.
"I could get used to this," he said, thinking of the best meal he'd just
eaten. Kasumi's cooking was among the top of his list, but even the
eldest Tendo girl didn't have as much variety as Jeannie. 'Hell, I'm not
sure she's even heard of all those yammy dishes!'
Hearing Ranma sigh contentedly, Jeannie asked: "Art thou pleased,
Master?"
"What kinda question's that?" Ranma replied, puzzled. "This's the best
fun I've had in a long time."
"But aren't thou wish to return to thou home?" she asked him.
"Are ya kiddin'? I ain't ever comin' back, that's for sure! Nothin' good
waits for me there, beside pop and I ain't comin' back for him. I don't
know what mom saw in him anyway..."
Ranma stopped in his tracks and frowned.
"What is the matter, Master?" the question immediately came.
"Damn, I hafta go back anyway! If I stay here, I'll never see my mom
again. I know she's still alive, I can feel it!" Ranma replied, sighing
again, this time out of longing.
"When shall we depart, Master?" Jeannie asked, getting the conversation
back on the right track, before Ranma got too upset.
"How about right now? Just wait 'till Akane gets a load of ya..."
Something in Ranma's head gave off a loud warning at that time. Sitting
up and turning towards the djinni, conveniently called Jeannie, he
earnestly regarded her appearance for the first time.
'Pretty, very pretty. Downright beautiful, in fact. Skimpily closed,
even compared to Shampoo, which says a lot. Calls me her Master...' At
that point the warning turned into a full-scale ringing in his ears.
Ranma could almost feel the trusty mallet, or any other conveniently
placed heavy blunt object impacting upon his skull.
"Um, listen here, Jeannie. I'm really sorry an' all, but there ain't no
way you can come with me," Ranma explained, apologetically, fuming
inside. He was missing a golden opportunity for a beautiful and exotic
woman to serve him free food at his every whim! 'That tomboy'd better
appreciate this!'
"Why not? Do I not please thee, Master?" Jeannie asked worriedly.
"No, no, it ain't nothing to do with ya!" Ranma quickly exclaimed,
waving his hands negatively. "See, I live with this girl, and she's...
how to put it..." Kasumi's words from the time he first came to the
Tendos resurfaced, and he decided to use them. "Akane's a sweet girl,
she's just a violent maniac."
When Jeannie blinked several times and no food appeared magically around
them, Ranma took it that she was probably confused by his explanation.
'Come to think of it, this ain't making any sense to me either, an' I
know the girl. I better check this with Kasumi when I get back.'
"So, you see now?" Ranma asked, hoping that the nice djinni understood
why she couldn't come with him. "It ain't like I don't want you to go,
you just can't, so don't do somethin' crazy like crying over me, all
right?"
"Yes, Master, I understand," Jeannie replied with a downcast look.
Seeing that he was ready to go, she blinked and sent Ranma on his way.
Once he was gone, she smiled and finished the sentence: "I understand
that you need me to save you from that girl, Master!"
One blink later the island was short of one djinni and her bottle.