Subject: [FFML] [ranma][parody/spamfic]Sex and the Single Samurai
From: allyn yonge
Date: 1/13/2000, 12:54 AM
To: ffml@fanfic.com

     The  characters  of the Ranma �  universe  are 
the creation   and   possession  of  the  brilliant  
Rumiko Takahashi.  They  belong  to Rumiko  Takahashi 
and  her licensees   (Shogakukan   Inc.,   Kitty-Fuji 
 TV,   Viz Communications   Inc.)  No  copyright 
infringement is intended.   

###################################

While discussing some stories I'm working on
(Sukeban chp. 7; Tyger, Tyger; The Long Way Home;
etc.) My friend and pre-reader Kazuma mentioned that
she wanted to do something with Ranma and Lolita.

Here is the original:



Lolita, light of my life, fire of my loins.
      My sin, my soul.  Lo-lee-ta: the tip of
      the tongue taking a trip of three steps
      down the palate to tap, at three, on the
      teeth.  Lo. Lee. Ta.
            She was Lo, plain Lo in the morning, 
      standing four feet ten in one sock.  She
      was Lola in slacks.  She was Dolly at
      school.  She was Dolores on the dotted
      line.  But in my arms she was always
      Lolita.
 
 ##########################################

And now if Takihashi-sama had written Lolita:

 Akane, bump on my head, pain in my guts.
      My sin, my soul.  A-Ka-Ne: the tip of
      a spear stabbing me three times
      deep into the gut to tap, at three, on the
      spine.  AH. Kaa. Kneeee.
            She was bAHka, plain bAHka in the morning,

      standing five feet four on one cinder block.    
     
      She was Akane in a fuku.  She was Un-cute at
      school.  She was Gorilla girl on the softball
       field.  But when she hammers my head she's    
       always  Akane.
 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

A short spamfic written by my friend and fellow writer
Kazuma.
This was inspired by a conversation we had regarding a
1 hour challenge on FFIRC.  The original fanfiction (
by another  author and which I can no longer find on
my HD) had a scene where Ranma (on their wedding
night) confesses that Akane is not his first. This is
the result of that conversation.
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@




Akane:  I am Akane, hear me roar. 
Rrrrrrooooarrrrrrrrr.

Ranma:  Uhhh. . .Akane, before we. . . ya know. . . 
there's sumpthin' I gotta tell ya.

Akane:  You contantly masturbate in front of a 
mirror while in girl form?

Ranma:  Well, yeah. . . but. . .

Akane:  You haven't been wearing my panties again, 
have you?

Ranma:  Well, that too, but it's sumpthin' else. . .

Akane:  Come to think of it, my vinyl thigh boots 
and chain-mesh bikini-thong have been missing for 
a while. . .

Ranma:  I was gonna give those back after the 
honeymoon.

Akane:  . . . and my cat o' nine tails with the ball
bearings on the ends. . .

Ranma:  Um, Akane. . .  the thing is. . .

Akane:  . . . and the matching nipple clamps . . .

Ranma:  Akane. . .

Akane:  . . . and my leather mask with the
zipper for a mouth . . .

Ranma:  AKANE!

Akane:  What?

Ranma:  You ain't gonna be my first!

Akane:  Neither are you.  Can we fuck now?

Ranma:  Are you gonna hit me?

Akane:  Of course.

Ranma:  Yatta!

=====
"When I get a little money, I buy books;
 And, if any is left, I buy food and clothes."-Erasmus

"A man is a small thing, and the night is large 
and full of wonders." -Lord Dunsany
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