I Didn't Know!
A Dragon Ball Spamfic
By C-Dogg
As any Dragon Ball fan can tell you, Trunks is the son of Bulma and Vegeta.
There have been many stories written about how those two got together. Sob
stories, comedies, dramas, and even lemons. But I've never seen any stories
focusing on how Yamucha and Bulma broke up. So I figured "Why don't I write
one myself?" So without a lot more ado, I present to you my product.
Disclaimer: To the owners of these characters, please don't sue me. I have no
money. Besides, my lawyer can beat up your lawyer.
* * *
3:00 P.M.
"Never again," he said. "Never again will I let any girl with even so much
as a blue highlight come near me."
Yamucha laid on his bed curled into a fetal position. The phone rang. He
didn't answer it. He was afraid of who might be on the other end. Deftly
afraid.
"I can't believe she did that to me. I'll never forget this day..."
* * *
8:00 A.M.
"What are you doing today?" Bulma asked Yamucha on the telephone.
"I didn't have anything planned," Yamucha answered. "Why?"
"Well, I was hoping you could take me to the mall."
"Sure. Is there anything that you planned on getting in particular?"
"Yeah. I'm choosing a birthday gift for my father and I need your help.
Then after that, you can help me pick out some lingerie for myself," she told
him in a sultry voice.
Yamucha's nose erupted in a gusher of blood. Puar rushed him with handfuls
of toilet paper.
"Pick me up at 11 o' clock," Bulma told him before adding, "And please
don't be late."
"Okay," said Yamucha in a nasal tone.
Yamucha had no idea that phone call would be the beginning of the second
worst day in his life, next to the day that the Saibaman blew him up, of
course.
* * *
8:03 A.M.
In the corner of a small studio apartment was a table with different sorts
of electronic recording equipment. At that table sat a sexy young girl who
wore nothing but a translucent red robe and a pair of black thong panties.
And a large pair of earphones. The girl removed the earphones and cackled
sinisterly.
"It's only a matter of time now before you're mine!" she said. The girl
got up from the table and laughed all the way to her room to change into
something more suitable.
* * *
9:05 A.M.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
Puar went to answer the door and, after much work, finally managed to open
it. The door flew open and smashed Puar behind it.
"Who's at the door, Puar?" Yamucha called from his bedroom.
"It's me honey!"
"Bulma? I thought you wanted me to pick you up."
"I thought I'd surprise you!" she said in an impish tone.
"Hold on. I'll be right out." A minute later, Yamucha emerged from his
room and his jaw dropped down to the floor. His girlfriend had bent over to
pick up her conveniently dropped red purse. She showed him just how tight her
red skirt was. She also wore a black tube top.
"Hi Yamucha!" she greeted as she stood back up. Yamucha only waved lightly
in response. She giggled at him and helped him pick up his chin. "Are you
ready to go?" she asked with a kiss on the cheek.
Yamucha promptly snapped out of his trance.
"Sure, let's go!" The two of them left hand in hand. Yamucha closed the
door behind them and Puar fell from his dent in the wall.
* * *
11:30 A.M.
A woman stood at the sidewalk tapping her foot lightly. Take note that
this woman was super pissed.
* * *
12:45 P.M.
(Yes, the mall is that far away)
Yamucha and Bulma walked through the mall and stopped in front of
Victoria's Secret.
"Bulma, didn't you want to buy a gift for your father?" the boy inquired.
"That can wait," she told him. "Right now I want to get something for
you!" The biggest smile possible spread across Yamucha's face. Bulma
kissed him again. "Wait out here. I'll be right out."
* * *
12:50 P.M.
A pink motor scooter rolled into the mall parking lot. The rider noticed a
red car already parked in there and came to an abrupt halt. She stepped off
the scooter and pulled out a crowbar.
* * *
1:30 P.M.
Yamucha lay sprawled on a bench, bored out of his mind. "This better be
damn good if it takes this long," he said to himself.
"Were you talking to me?"
He opened his eyes to see Bulma standing over him. Yamucha jumped up from
the bench. "Oh, no. I was just mumbling to myself. What did you buy?"
She gave him sly smirk. "I'm wearing it."
"Really? When can I see it?"
"Soon if you play your cards right. Now let's," Bulma looked around
casually and nearly had a heart attack.
"What's wrong?" Yamucha asked. He had never seen his girlfriend act that
way before.
Bulma grabbed his hand and began to rush through the crowd. "Nothing!
Let's go!" She led him to a door with a blue sign on it and pushed him
through it. She then locked the door behind them.
"Bulma, are you sure I should be in a woman's restroom?" Yamucha asked.
Bulma responded by kissing him hard on the lips. She leaned him against a
wall and bean to disrobe.
* * *
1:32 P.M.
A woman grabbed the doorknob for the women's restroom. Much to her dismay,
the door was locked.
"Well this has been one grand day. First my boyfriend stands me up and now
this." She pounded on the door. "Could you move it along lady!"
"Go away! I'm busy!" a voice returned from inside.
The woman outside kicked open the door and gasped to see her doppelganger
sitting half-naked on top of her shirtless boyfriend.
"Yamucha?"
"Bulma? If you're there then this is..."
"Maron?"
"Oh $hit!"
"Yamucha, would you excuse us for a moment," Yamucha left the bathroom and
closed the door, still not quite sure what had happened. He heard fighting
and loud shrieks from within the room followed by the sound of a flushing
toilet and gurgling. Bulma finally opened the door as she wiped a tiny bit of
blood off of her face with a paper towel.
"Where's Maron?" he inquired.
Bulma made a head motion toward one of the toilets. "Now it's your turn!"
"But Bulma, I swear I didn't know!" Yamucha pleaded. Bulma grabbed his
throat, yanked him into the room, and slammed the door.
* * *
2:55 P.M.
A shattered, battered, and tattered red car pulled up in front of the
apartment. Yamucha crawled out and pulled his body through the door. He
crawled passed the still unconscious Puar and into his bedroom where he
curled up on his bed.
"Never again," he said. "Never again will I let any girl with even so much
as a blue highlight come near me." The phone rang. He didn't answer it. He
was afraid of who might be on the other end. Deftly afraid.
"I can't believe she did that to me. I'll never forget this day. Curse
Kuririn and his damned exgirlfriend."
* * *
3:01 P.M.
Bulma slammed the receiver down. "Fine! If he doesn't want to let me
apologize then forget him! There are plenty of fish in the sea!" She picked
up the phone again and dialed a number. "Hi Kuririn. What are you doing next
Saturday?"
******************
Questions? Comments? (Intelligent) Flames? Praises? Shunnings?
Send them to bigc123485@aol.com or c_dogg@my-deja.com
General C-Dogg
Weilder of the Baka Bat
Lover of Videl
Red Ribbon Army - The World is Ours!
http://homestead.dejanews.com/user.c_dogg/entrance.html
"Do these pampers make my ass look big?" Baby Stewie, Family Guy
"Sponsored by Chang's Chinese Chow and Chinese Hoes, Where our girl's are
hungry for more and dim sum." -Walter, The PJs
"You bad boys! I've spoiled you! New armor, saved your lives and this is how
you repay me?!?! Well kiss it good bye!" -Vegeta
"You just ruined a half million dollars in plastic surgery! Now I'm going to
take it out of your ass!" -Micheal Jackson, Celebrity Deathmatch
"I'm not sure if there's a God or a heaven but I know one thing for sure.
Your dad's going to Hell." a reverend to Hank, King of the Hill