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PRESENTS...
[ Slayers Demiurge ]
book five
"Competition"
A Slayers Fanfic Series by Stefan "Twoflower" Gagne
(Certain characters copyright H. Kanzaka / R. Araizumi,
obviously. If I ever even considered claiming that those
were my own characters I'd probably be thrown into a small
cell where I'd be forced to eat my own writer's block to live.)
Check out the web center with fanart and more, at
--> http://pixelscapes.com/slayers/demiurge <--
-=-
Competition is underscored by victory.
All known human conflicts are hinged on their outcomes, on the end
results. Who will live and who will die. Who will win and who will lose.
Microcosms of the purest form of conflict exist in simulations, in
reenactments under restrictions -- the valiant, the proud, the brave, they
are the ones who can overcome the odds and lay claim to victory.
Brave warriors all, facing off in the arena of combat, to pit skill
against skill, in the honesty of competition. A noble and glorious form of
combat, an ancient game of talent and will, and the drive to succeed.
Many stories are written of these honorable rituals, of these contests
of the human spirit.
This is not one of them.
-------------
five part one
-------------
"Another one?!" Penny exclaimed, disbelieving. "How can you get two
royal flushes in a row?"
"Oooh, just lucky," Lina chirped, collecting the pot, the wad of paper
money and coins. "Well well! I guess that means I've got, what, more than
half of the funds?"
"But it's MY trust fund!"
"Was. Past tense," Lina pointed out, while palming an ace into her
glove.
The chain of events leading up to this 'winning' hand went something
like this :
The impromptu game of poker had broken out of an argument, which had
been egged on by the generally bad situation they were walking away from and
the extended delay of their transport. Spirits were running low. Zoamel had
wandered off, as usual, to do whatever odd business he tended to do; and in
his absence, Lina decided to assert her 'Team Leader' role, and suggest that
she handle the finances for their little quest. Penny objected. Lina
suggested that if the gods of chance intended for her to handle the money,
they'd deliver it to her in a game of cards. And from the looks of it, she'd
be stinking rich in a few hands.
"So when the heck is this Spain gonna be arriving, anyway?" Lina
complained, pocketing another 15% of the cash and swapping her hidden ace for
a king and a jack.
"It's a TRAIN, Lina. And it should be any second now, I mean, Sairaag
Empire Rail is usually so punctual. I don't see how they could be delayed an
hour. It's a very efficiently run country, and--"
"And they tried to kill us earlier," Lina grumbled.
"I know they tried to kill us, but.. that doesn't mean I don't have to
like what they've done, Lina. I mean, without Sairaag we wouldn't have
airships and trains and nobody would be able to communicate without a two
month delay assuming your letter goes through, and we wouldn't be able to
farm as fast as we can or any of the other great things we do thanks to
technology!"
"You sound like a sales pitch. Call."
"Uh... two pair?" Penny tried.
"Five of a kind!" Lina declared, and snagged the rest of the booty.
"Well! Good game! Don't worry, I'll spend this wisely on dinner for myself
and nice, soft beds! And fresh baths and really nice clothes and maybe if I
can find a magic shop along the way I can stock up on amulets, and... and..
...what were we talking about again?"
"Sairaag," Penny reminded, sitting back in her uncomfortable train
station waiting area seating and watching all her money go bye bye.
"Right, Sairaag," Lina said, pocketing the rest of the funds. "I don't
buy it."
"I'd hope not! Even with my money, you can't afford a country!"
Lina just.. stared at her, for a moment, before clearing her throat to
continue. "What I MEAN is I don't buy all these marvelous, world-changing
advances. I was only gone for two decades! How in blazes did humanity whip
up flying machines and iron horses and steam powered revolving modular
whatsimajiggers in that amount of time?! It doesn't make any sense!"
"But how can you not believe in something we rode on the other day? It
wasn't a dream, Lina. I mean, I guess it'd seem strange to an old person
like you--"
"HEY!"
"--but it is true. This stuff exists," Penny said, logically. "I
thought we covered this when we were waiting for the airship, anyway."
Lina sat back in her seat, and rubbed her forehead. A headache was
definitely en route. "Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know. It's been a long day,
okay? Stuff's eating at me. For instance, WHERE IS THE DAMN TRIPE?!"
"Train," Penny corrected, again. "And I'm sure it'll be along any
minute now."
[*]
Just a few miles outside of the port city of Darata, a lumbering beast
of iron and metal roared down poorly constructed tracks, dragging behind it a
tail of steel, boxlike cars. But a much nastier beast was lying in wait,
just for the right moment to snag its prey. To make it do his bidding!
"SQUWAK!" came a muffled sound from the demon beast's napsack.
"Hush up, this takes concentration," Xelloss hissed, whirling the iron
hook over his head, attached to a heavy chain. "And stay put, I don't need a
wad of feathers getting ground under the wheels of that thing when we touch
down. Alley-oop!"
The hook whirled through the air, sure and true...
And snagged on an outcropping on the speeding train.
"And now... the unpleasant part," Xelloss said to himself, as he was
jerked from State A (a standstill on the hillside) to State B (flying through
the air at fifty miles and hour) in the space of a second.
Normal humans would probably have remained on the hill, and watched as
their severed arms went flying through the air. Then they would have died.
Xelloss was made of stronger stuff, fortunately, even in his weakened
condition. Once the acceleration wave hit him, he merely winced. Then it
was all downhill, or rather, up-chain, as he quickly climbed along the
length, and planted his feet on top of the car.
"That wasn't so bad, was it?!" he called to his companion, as he secured
himself to the car, and settled in to enjoy the ride. The scenery would be
rather lovely at this speed, he had to admit.
His eyes strayed to the road leading into Darata, which ran parallel to
the train tracks, and to the rider who was practically keeping time with the
train. The horse was winded, but he pushed anyway, driven like a man
possessed.
"I hope he hurries," Xelloss commented to himself. "I'd hate to be him
when his wife finds out he missed them by mere seconds."
[*]
The dustcloud kicked up by the horse extended for fifty feet, as it bore
down with Ludicrous Speed, into the bullet-pocked city of Darata.
Two eyes locked onto the train, as the rider broke away from the tracks,
and used instinct to try and navigate the city streets to the train station.
Of course, the streets were crowded; but his horse was a fine mare, and
managed to jump two apple carts, and skid under a low hanging bridge, before
approaching the station.
(He managed to snag an apple off the cart as they jumped; his horse
would probably be demanding it if he ever intended to re-mount without
getting two hooves planted in his behind in equine disgust.)
He slowed the horse -- just marginally -- then JUMPED directly out of
the saddle, feet breaking into a sprint when they hit the ground. Cheap,
military issue boots pounded on the cobblestones, then up the marble stairs,
into the station itself...
The train was starting to pull away, and he could JUST make out the
orange-blonde pigtailed head in a passenger car window, back turned to him.
"PENNY!!!" he screamed, and made a lunging dive for the closing doors...
Only to get his hand caught in them.
He shrieked, and did his best to run alongside the train, pounding on
the doors -- which made them let go of his poor hand, but didn't alert the
girl sitting just fifteen feet away. He stumbled, tripped, and planted his
face into the floor as the train finally rolled off.
Lina wasn't going to like this.
A familiar chime from his backpack told him that she DEFINITELY wasn't
going to like this.
Gourry stood up, shook his head to clear it, and withdrew the two way
scrying sphere he had been sent with. His wife's irritated face occupied the
entire ball, warped around because she was leaning in so close.
"Well?!" she demanded.
"Ah... wouldn't you know it! Missed them by THAT much," Gourry said,
making a pinch between his fingers that covered an inch. "Bad luck?"
Lina ZOTted him through the astral link. His hair stood on end.
"BAKA!" Lina barked. "I told you not to wait around in Nostrum so long!
If you hadn't, you could've caught up to them by now!"
"But they couldn't get that temple fire out!" Gourry protested. "It's
my duty as a protectorate of the country of Zeifelia to--"
"GET ON THE NEXT TRAIN TO ATLASS CITY, jellyfish brains!" Lina shouted,
loud enough to make the scrying sphere shake.
Gourry got testy. (Could he be blamed?) "I'm doing my best here, okay?
I saw her, and she's fine, and that's the important thing! We'll get her
back, I promise! Okay?!"
The sphere went quiet. Gourry cursed himself; he usually didn't yell at
his wife. He didn't like to, and didn't want to, and each time he got mad
enough to, he never forgot it...
"...okay. Okay," Lina said, her voice calmed. "Gourry.. I'm sorry. I
didn't mean to snap, it's just... I mean..."
"I know, Lina," Gourry said, stroking the sphere with his thumb, smiling
a bit. This he did know; Lina was never very good at expressing her
feelings, unless it was done loudly. "I'm just as worried as you are. But I
promise she'll be fine. She's just got a little wanderlust, you know... kids
these days. Listen, Lina, it's not too late. You could probably hop a train
or a ship to Atlas City and meet me when I arrive. The next train from here
won't leave for half a day, after all."
Lina got That Look.
It was one Gourry was very familiar with. A blank stare, almost like a
silent rest in the middle of a song. Whenever he suggested she actively go
out and do something risky, she would get like this. He knew then he
couldn't convince her.
"I've got to tend to the shop, Gourry," she said, her usual excuse, in
her usual even, dulled tone. But immediately after, her expression slid from
empty back to soft, and caring. "Besides, you can handle this. Look.. I
have faith in you. I may yell sometimes, but you know I trust you. I'm
going to zap you some of the money we collected today -- someone bought Big
Bertha."
"The two hundred pound magical staff?" Gourry asked, surprised. "Wow.
I thought we'd never get rid of that..."
A series of golden coins emerged from the scrying sphere, each with a
sharp flash of light.
"That's for your train ticket," Lina said. "And maybe enough for a
meal. I'll see if I can get some more big sales to help you. Okay? I'll
help you from home. I'm helping, right?"
"Hai, Lina-chan. You're helping," Gourry said, caressing the sphere
again. Not that she could feel it, but... "You're helping a lot. Thanks.
I'd better go buy that ticket."
"Okay. And Gourry?.. call me when you're on the train. I mean, I'll be
really busy here at the shop and all, but I'm sure I could find some time to
chat, if you get, you know, lonely."
"Right," Gourry agreed, knowing she didn't mean HE would be lonely.
"See you then. Love you."
He did love her. No matter how much she had changed since that day.
[*]
Lina watched the trees go by and go by and go by and go by and go by and
go by and go by until she felt the need to throw up. Then she just sat
quietly and waited for this train ride to be over.
At least on the Aquatic Mongoose, you could content yourself with big
dinners and other diversions. You weren't sitting right next to a window
watching the terrain go by -- and even if you were, it was just a featureless
stretch of ocean. Here, Lina could damn well tell how fast they were going,
and it was.. just abnormal. Unthinkable speed, for someone unused to this
age.
She wasn't afraid of this stuff. No, no, that wasn't Lina Inverse,
after all. She always knew what was going down, was always cool and in
control because she KNEW the world. How it worked, what spell does what,
histories ancient and mysterious. What she didn't know about was whatever
the hell this world was she had woken to... and adapting was harder than she
thought it would be. Not that she'd admit it.
To kill time and take her mind off things, she decided to strike up a
conversation. Zoamel had been sulky ever since Drake's demise, and only
talked when he had to -- which had Penny chewing on her lip constantly in
worry, concern and puppy-dog-eyes style nervousness. Ick. Lina, however,
preferred the direct approach in all things.
"What the hell's wrong with you, Zoamel?" she asked, shocking Penny and
breaking the silence in one fell swoop. "Come on, spill it. Are you
depressed because of Drake?"
"Depressed?" Zoamel asked. "No. Saddened, perhaps. But now, I'm
simply contemplating my mission."
"Uh... wasn't your mission a fraud?" Lina asked. "We tricked your
followers into letting you out. The rest was just happy coincidence. I know
you're really excited about vengeance on Sairaag, but we didn't originally--"
"Lina, quit picking on Zoamel-san!" Penny defended, moving to sit next
to him instead of her living idol. "He's had a bad day."
Zoamel cleared his throat, a technique many gods, omniscient powers and
holy icons use to get attention when lightning bolts or locusts fail.
"Lina... there is something you must understand," Zoamel said. "To a
Demiurge, the followers are all. When you convinced my people to let me go
with you, it was not just a convenient excuse. I took it to heart, as they
did, to seek vengeance against our enemies. I have let them down, allowing
Sairaag to claim another soul. My mission is not complete, and my faith will
not be fulfilled until this extra sin has been punished. I am not depressed.
I am simply contemplating what it will take to finish my holy quest."
"Oi, you sound like a bible," Lina grumbled. "And I know about the
followers thing. Drake explained it all to me already, the whole song and
dance."
"It's more than a song and dance," Zoamel corrected, mildly offended but
far too gentlemanly to let it show. "This is our way of life. It is the
whole purpose of what we consider our life. It's not enough to know the
words, to understand them; you have to feel them."
"I'm planning not to need to feel them," Lina grumbled, crossing her
arms. "...I don't need to be a Demiurge. The world can get along without
me. Drake couldn't have been--"
She found herself going from seated on a comfortable bench to flying to
the front of the train car rather fast. Lina adjusted her position in the
universe quickly, and got to her feet while the other passengers scrabbled
and flailed around in confusion, over the screeching grind of the train
wheels, braking hard against the track...
"Why'd we stop?!" Lina barked, marching to the door at the front of the
train car. She wrenched it open. "You know how bad it is on one's stomach
to go really fast and then stop that sudden? This truck's got no respect
for..... Penny! Get off Zoamel and come with me."
Penny's face, tomato red as she had landed on Zoamel in a Compromising
Position(tm) took a few seconds to react. "Ah, hai, Lina!!" she got up fast,
bowed in apology, and took off through the door between the cars.
Quietly, and with dignity, Zoamel stood and resumed his seat. He did
not need to be present for what would transpire; he could smell a small
miracle a mile away, after all.
[*]
The iron rails beneath the train's wheels were still smoking and hot, as
the engineer was marched out of the engine at staffpoint.
The goons had set a mountain in front of the train. A mountain! If he
hadn't slammed the brakes, they would have plowed right into the thing. Who
on earth would.. or could.. do something like that?
The magical staff smacked behind his knees, and he fell to them, looking
up at the gang of black robed sorcerers. They were a mean looking bunch, but
all quite old; as if the senior citizen's rest home had emptied out a bunch
of very disgruntled wizards. But he knew better than to mess with old men
who had THAT kind of magic, even if the folks back in Sairaag said there was
nothing to fear from the old ways and arts...
"Kneel before Dreadlord Maygus the Relatively Omnipotent, foolish
Sairaag dog!" the main gray bearded goon shouted, jamming his staff into the
soft dirt. "Show respect to the true rulers of this wilderness that you and
your kin so callously have laid heathen iron rails through!"
"But I just drive it, I didn't lay the rails," the engineer said before
realizing exactly how stupid it sounded, and before getting a sharp
electrical jolt from that staff.
The other sorcerers laughed at his plight, as the leader spoke. "You
who would disrupt the absolute purity of our magical land with your beastous
machines must pay a fine for disturbing our peace," he stated, holding out
his hand. "The ticket money will do nicely, as well as any soft serve
precooked dinners you had stored to give your passengers. The kind without
the tough meat, it's bad for our dentures. ONLY THEN we will remove this
mountain we have wrought with our divine black magic! "
The engineer spoke faster than his brain again. "But the ticket money's
stored at the station now because the trains kept getting robbed--"
The leader raised his staff again... pointing it at a guarded cargo car,
hooked right behind the engine for maximum security. (Although the guards
were currently paralyzed by spells.) "Then perhaps we should detonate a few
cars, so that you understand the penalty and come prepared next time!!"
The working man's eyes widened. "Whoa, no, wait, not that! Anything
but that! Detonate one of the passenger cars if you have to, but--"
A ball of fire engulfed the lead sorcerer. There was a bit of panicked
screaming, before he cast a dispel on it, and emerged merely singed... and
utterly enraged with every single one of his seventy years behind him.
His request for information was simple, but cut short.
"WHO dares--?!"
"ME! Fireball!"
The row of goons behind the leader ran for the hills, hobbling along on
their staffs before the orange ball of magical flame ignited the grass where
they stood.
Who could be doing that? the engineer thought, and turned his eyes to
the figure who stood atop the train's engine itself, a hand smoking from the
fire she had just hurled from her fingertips...
Lina Inverse clenched a smoking fist. "What're you doing accosting
these guys, gramps? They're just trying to travel places! You should go
back to sitting in rocking chairs on porches and complaining about kids these
days! Because this time, you didn't just upset a cowering bunch of
passengers, you upset Lina Inverse's stomach, and for that you will be
terminated with extreme prejudice!!"
95% of the remaining wizards had the same reaction. "LINA INVERSE?!",
they shouted at top volume, and then ran away, picking up their robes so as
not to trip over them as they beat a hasty retreat. The engineer scrambled
to safety next to the train and away from these idiots... but one idiot
stayed behind. The chief idiot.
"I've heard all about you, Lina Inverse!" the old man shouted, twirling
his staff, and starting to glow with a sickly purple magical aura, power
flaring and building. "I've always wanted to test my mettle against the
ultimate master of black magic! Today is the day you learn to respect your
eld-- what're you doing now?!"
Lina stood back a step, framing up the old man against the magically
hewn mountain. One nice clear line connecting her to the wiz-bandit to the
pile of rocks...
Of course, he'd see it coming a mile away since she'd have to chant the
spell, part of Lina rationalized.
But we don't HAVE to chant the spell, another part said, with no small
amount of glee...
To prove it, she didn't even say the words, as she launched a red flare
that boiled sanity as easily as the air it plowed through. In her mind, it
was a Dragon Slave, so a Dragon Slave it was.
The ground rocked with the explosion that engulfed the immovable object,
freeing the path for the irresistible force to continue on its merry way.
When the smoke cleared, the mountain was gone, the rails had melted a bit but
were still in serviceable condition, and the chief wizard was winging his way
to Atlas City via a more direct, airborne method.
And all around her, applause burst out, a rolling wave of it. In
surprise, Lina turned, to see a crowd...
The passengers had left the train to see what was happening, and had
done it just in time to watch the victorious blast. The engineer, thankful
that his cargo hadn't been destroyed, was cheering louder than any of them.
Lina Inverse was the subject of so many smiling faces and cheers from
the people that she saved that she actually started to blush. Penny, who
hadn't actually gotten to fight (much to her disgust) got to lead the
cheerleading squad (much to her delight.)
"THREE CHEERS FOR LINA INVERSE!!" she shouted, jumping up and down and
waving her arms. "Bandit killer supreme and all around heroic kinda girl!
Yaaaaaay!"
The first wave took her entirely by surprise. It was a strange
sensation, an invisible stroke to the ego, but a stroke to more than that; it
was empowering, it filled her, it satisfied her more than any six person
chicken dinner ever could.
It was the faith and adoration of people who believed in her, in what
she represented, in the miracle she had performed to save them all. Not just
an ego boost, not just fame, but something more gratifying, something
wonderful for its own sake as well as her own. Some sort of invisible pact
between them that had been fulfilled, mutually agreed on. Not a slave being
ordered around, or a helpless mass saved by an uncaring greater power. It
was faith in miracles.
In short, it felt *really good*.
"Ah.. thank you, thank you!" Lina shouted, waving her arms too. "This
train may continue to Atlas City without fear! If anybody else tries to mess
with you, I'll blast them into next Thursday! Yeah!"
For the rest of the ride, Lina would be given personal thanks, a few
token gifts, and lots and lots of food. This was Lina Inverse, after all,
whose power was rivaled only by her appetite. Somehow, something inside her
thought, this Demiurge thing isn't too bad. It was like Drake said, the way
people thought of her, what it meant to you at the core. Maybe being a
Demiurge wasn't as horribly unfair as she thought.
Then she got food poisoning from the poor quality mass transit precooked
dinners and spent the rest of the ride to Atlas City with her head over a
toilet, and promptly forgot all about that moment. For the moment.
(Despite the messy ending, Zoamel actually smiled for the rest of the
trip home, silent yet internally pleased.)
-------------
five part two
-------------
The sun is as the sun does; it shines. It shines through thin clouds,
it gets blocked by thick ones, it rises in the morning and sets in the
evening. Consistent and predictable, you can always rely on the sun to
behave in a certain way.
Still, one could argue that maybe the sun was shining just a LITTLE
brighter over Atlas City that day. Band music sounded from its streets,
balloons flew over head and fireworks were being set off. The whole city
seemed to be involved in a celebration.
"Boy, these guys know how to throw a welcoming party!" Lina declared
proudly, bounding down the steps to the train platform two at a time. She
gave a V for victory sign to the cheering masses, gathered to wait for the
train's arrival, and was about to launch into a prepared speech when she
noticed something... odd.
The crowd was composed entirely of children.
A seething mass of short humanity, pushing at the heavily armed guards
that kept them from rushing the train en masse. Their parents could be seen
somewhere in the back of the crowd, nervous little mortals who seemed to be
staring into the face of unmentionable horror. Lina knew she had that affect
on some people, but why would all these kids want to see her?
"I don't think they're here to see you, Lina," Penny said, echoing her
unsaid statement. "They're looking over at that car hooked up behind the
engine. You know, the big white and yellow one?"
"...oh," Lina said, deflated a little. (That little reality check
abruptly halted her amusing voyage into being a publicly worshipped goddess.)
"What's going on, then? Looks weird enough to be interesting."
"It is none of our business," Zoamel stated, ignoring the crowd. "We do
have a mission here, Lina. Drake said the Tooth Fairy, or someone who knew
of his location, was here in Atlas. It's a shame he couldn't have been more
specific, so we will have to work long and hard to locate-- where are you
going?"
"I've got a hunch," Lina said, waving the pair off. "And I know better
than to ignore hunches. Wait here if you're not interested."
She couldn't get too close to the crowd -- which was for the best,
considering how dangerous that thundering pack of school age kids looked.
They were trying desperately to push past the guards, as the train doors were
hauled open.. revealing stacks and stacks of small, foil wrapped packages. A
collective high pitched cheer went up that made Lina's ears seriously
consider bleeding.
An overweight, balding merchant leaned out of the train car... and
froze, like he was staring down a squadron of Mazoku death commandos rather
than a flock of schoolchildren. But somehow, he managed to push past the
fear, and issue some orders through his megaphone.
"NOBODY gets a card pack without a claim ticket!!" he shouted. "Present
your ticket to the guard ONE AT A TIME, and you'll get your preorders in
plenty of time for the event! Now... uh... we're a just a teesny LITTLE bit
understocked, so I'm afraid it'll have to be first come first serve, and--
no, wait, don't do that! Children, please! No!! I swear you'll get your
AAAHGHHHHH!!!"
The group swarmed the car, bowling past the guards with ease after the
line finally broke from pressure. The merchant vanished in a seat of school
uniforms as the car was summarily looted. The guards, partially trampled,
tried to establish order but seemed reluctant to act -- after all, what were
they going to do, shoot children?
(And oddly, each child had only taken one shiny and new package off the
train before returning to their parent's side. Because kids may be driven to
some pretty weird lengths, but they would later have to deal with not
enjoying dessert if they actually STOLE something...)
Within minutes, the mob scene was over just as fast as it had started,
leaving only some very disgruntled guards and the disheveled merchant.
Penny was aghast. "What.. what on earth could be worth THAT? It just
looked like, I don't know, big packets of chewing gum or something..."
"Who knows with kids these days?" Lina said, with a dismissive shrug.
"I remember back when I was a kid, EVERYBODY had to have one of those magic
pet rocks that turn colors depending on what your mood is. Mine was always
black, so I threw it out. So much for my hunch. I guess you were right,
Zoamel, this has nothing to do with us. We should--"
"We have to find the one responsible for this immediately."
"--find the one responsible for this immediately, right," Lina repeated
before realizing exactly what she happened to be repeating. She turned to
him, in surprise. "Eh?"
Both Inverse and Gabriev looked at their companion in clueless
confusion, as Zoamel looks at the empty train car in fierce coldness. He
clenched a fist at a memory.. then released it, and explained.
"I know of the Demiurge that Drake intended for us to meet," Zoamel
Gustav stated, in absolute seriousness. "This is his work. Whatever shape
he has taken this time, he is responsible for this, and will tell us what we
need to know."
"Oooo... kay," Lina agreed, a little spooked. "I get this feeling from
your attitude that we're dealing with very bad news. Is this guy dangerous?"
"Not precisely," Zoamel said, turning to walk to the train station
revolving door. "He is.. ideologically dangerous, I suppose. You'll see.
First, we have investigating to do."
And so, the noble adventuring party did set forth towards battle and
glory, leaving the peaceful train station behind.
Which is a shame, because if they had stayed half a minute longer they
would have seen a VERY tired Mazoku slump off the top of the dining car,
secretly praying to Shaburanigdo that one day, whoever invented this bloody
form of transpiration would be dangled over a pit of scorpions. While on
fire.
[*]
In a back alley, two heated rivals were ready to settle things once and
for all. They had agreed to the weapons for the fight. They agreed to the
setting, on the hard streets of Atlas City. Today, it would be settled, once
and for all, which one of them was the big fat doody head.
Both street fighters stood at barely three feet tall, as they squared
off, glaring each other down and trying to look all bad and mean.
"I'm gonna smash you, Danny!" the first said, pointing dramatically..
and flicking a card into the palm of his hand. "Your skills won't be enough
to beat the expert training I've been undergoing! But I'll let you have the
first shot, you big booger!"
Danny's left eye twitched. He twirled, and flicked a card between his
fingers... a card that glowed a bright purple, as he spoke the words of
power.
"PICKLEROO, I CHOOSE YOU!"
The lightning arced from the card, striking the alley -- and where it
touched, a furry, adorable little green kangaroo with boxing gloves appeared.
It shadowboxed for a second, before crying out "Pickle!".
But his enemy was ready. His own card flared, and a weird little cross
between a duck, a zebra and an eggbeater emerged. And the fight was on!
"Pickleroo! Electric Gerkin attack now!" the bully shouted, pointing--
"FIREBALL!"
A brief orange blaze engulfed Pickleroo, crisping it nicely. The 'roo
coughed a few times, spitting out soot, then collapsed.
Penny quickly pulled Danny to safety, while Lina kept the other kid
covered. "Hey! Are you hurt?" Penny asked, checking the kid for injuries.
"You could have seriously hurt each other! Little kids shouldn't be playing
with wild animals!"
Danny pulled away from Penny. "You interrupted our match! Aww, man.
Now we're gonna have to start all over. Hey, Billy, maybe we should go to
your house?"
"I can't, mom won't let me have matches there since we burned down the
garden last time," Billy replied.
Lina looked back and forth between the two, and the disgruntled little
kangaroo, which was pitching a scorched fit in silence (since it only knew
one word, and it wasn't applicable at the moment). "Uh... what the heck were
you two doing, then?"
"We were having a Mooki-Pokko match!" Danny exclaimed. "Boy, you people
don't know anything! It's only the biggest thing in Atlas City! Where are
YOU people from if you don't know that, old lady?"
Lina LOOMED LIKE THE DARK SPECTRE OF DEATH over the kids. "WHO are you
calling old?!!"
Both kids grabbed each other in fear. "N-nobody, nice lady!!" the
blurted simultaneously.
"Lina!" Penny chided, frowning in Moral Objection. "Don't scare them
like that!"
"It gets results, doesn't it? So, kiddies!" Lina chirped, looking
pleased with herself. "What's Mooki-Pokko? You'll tell the nice lady all
about it, yes?"
"It-it's a game," Billy explained, quickly. He flashed his white
trading card, and held it out for Lina to examine. "You collect these cards
that come in these packs, and you trade them with friends to get the best
Mooki-Pokko. Then you have matches to see who has the strongest ones, and
they get stronger the more they fight. Gotta smash 'em all! See, I've got
Eggduckza and he's got Pickleroo, and Pickleroo is weak against Fowl Play
attacks, but Eggduckza is allergic to vegetables but could evolve into
Scrambleplatypusantelope if he beats a Pickleroo with his special ultimate
finishing technique, so it's all about the strategy of who you fight and what
you trade! Oh, and it's really fun, too!"
Zoamel, who simply stood at the mouth of the alley the whole time in
determined silence, spoke up. "The maker of those cards is the one we want.
Children, do you know who makes these... Mooki-Pokko?"
"You can't have mine!" Danny blurted. "I saved all my money to buy
Pickleroo! You should have just preordered a card pack from today's
shipment."
"They might be able to trade for some at the arena," Billy suggested.
"I bet there's lots of kids there waiting for the big event tomorrow!"
"Now we're getting somewhere!" Lina said, offering the kids a big 'ol
smile. "And where is this arena, exactly?"
[*]
The arena could seat up to ten thousand of the little brats, and with a
hefty ticket charge on each seat, that added up to riches in the bank. Good
for ensuring he could enjoy an indulgent lifestyle of women, food and
motorized conveniences. Good for paying his medical expenses after that
scene in the train station, as well.
When the merchant Mint Endo had signed on to produce and sell these
Mooki-Pokko cards, nobody had talked to him about hazard pay. As he lumped
around on a makeshift crutch, trying to see the stage preparations with his
good eye, he only had one thought : hurts like hell, but OH so worth it.
Selling those ridiculous mood rocks around Sairaag in this day and age wasn't
getting him anywhere, but this new fad in Atlas City was like a license to
print money! He took Mooki-Pokko quite seriously, as seriously as he took
the concepts of profit, float, margin and gross. Since they were basically
the same things, from a certain point of view.
If only his underlings would get their acts together.
Mint whacked a roadie with his crutch. "No, you idiot! It's MOOKI! M-
O-O-K-I, no Y! We can't bloody well hang up a huge banner tomorrow reading
'MOOKY-Pokko Grand Happy Smiling Dragon Master Championship Tournament!'
It'd look silly."
"R-Right!" the roadie babbled. "I'll have the banner changed
immediately!!" He scrambled behind the stage, the offending paper banner
flaring out behind him and snagging on various piles of stage props.
"And get more security outside!!" Mint shouted after him. "Those stupid
kids will flood in here like a tsunami if we don't keep the doors shut!"
*BOOM*. An explosion rocked the south end of the arena... rent-a-guard
security officials running screaming from the sound, as the massive doors of
the arena collapsed, folding better than a Mooki-Pokko card despite being
comprised of foot thick granite.
Mint's jaw nearly hit the floor. Rising doctor bills were floating in
his head as he scrambled for higher ground, weakly climbing one of the
support posts for the arena, while kids streamed in. Fortunately, there
wasn't actually anything a kid would find interesting going around, so they
mostly milled around looking for Mooki-Pokko stuff and wondering why nothing
was ready yet...
But three others came in with them, once the crowd had thinned a bit.
Some weird guy in white, and two girls. One of which had traditional dress
for a sorceress... albeit a few years out of fashion. Mint knew fashion
trends quite well.
"You're going to pay to replace that door!" he shouted from fifteen feet
up, clinging to a pole like a koala bear.
Penny Gabriev pointed uber-dramatically. "You who would use your powers
as a Demiurge to warp small children's minds around consumerism, you are
unforgivable! In the name of Lina Inverse, I'll punish you!"
"...............what?" was Mint's reply.
Lina groaned, and bopped Penny lightly over the head. "Let me handle
this, okay?"
"Ehheh.. sorry, I was just all excited, with the whole taking out the
doors and rushing in, and, um.. right. Right. Go ahead, Lina."
"Better. Okay, bucko, we know what you're up to," Lina told the man.
"So don't bother hiding behind the 'I'm just a simple merchant' crap.
Where's the Tooth Fairy?"
"Are you people insane?!" Mint shouted. "I AM just a simple merchant!
And the Tooth Fairy doesn't exist! Now get the hell out of here before I
call for the city guard!"
Zoamel sized up Mint.. but not just with his eyes. He considered the
children, busy trading cards with each other, already bored with the
unprepared arena, and definitely ignoring the poor salesman in a fix.
"Lina... he is telling the truth. Feel him, he's not a Demiurge."
"I'd rather not feel any part of him," Lina said, making an 'Ick' face.
"No, I mean with your mind. With your soul. Close your eyes, it might
be easier... do you know the feeling you experienced at the train holdup?"
"Eh? How did you know about--"
"Imagine that the flow of that feeling from your followers to yourself
is a set of dual-connected paths," Zoamel explained. "Belief flows in two
directions. Close your eyes and try to see them. But don't see ones
connected to you... use the children around us. They aren't connected to
this man at all."
Lina closed her eyes, willing to at least try it rather than dismiss it
immediately. Of course, no mystical glowing lines popped into view, no
matter how hard she tried to concentrate on them. (Not that Lina typically
as a zen master of concentration.)
It was ridiculous. Ordinarily she'd have some flippant remark, but
after what she'd been through today, it made an odd kind of sense. That
sense of...
There!
Her mind wandering off topic had worked. For a brief moment, she FELT
rather than saw it. A flow like a river from the kids around them, possibly
stronger than the people she had saved at the robbery... and it was going
straight past the merchant and --
"He's coming!" Lina declared, feeling that the destination was
approaching, rapidly. It ignored solid matter, making a beeline from
Wherever to Here, with some sense of purpose about it... she juiced up a
fireball, figuring on some monster god arriving ready to smite them all, and
aimed it at the stage...
A trapdoor on the stage opened where there was no trapdoor. Six
spotlights lit, from various locations around the arena... despite not having
spotlights there. A drum roll echoed in the empty walls, all the children
turning to face the stage, a unified motion...
And another kid rose from the trapdoor, waving friendly-like to
everybody. He wore ordinary kid's clothes, save for a belt around his waist
with a pouch for his Mooki-Pokko deck, and a backwards cap with the Mooki-
Pokko logo emblazoned on it in the finest gold.
"Hi!" he greeted, a cheerful voice of youth. "I'm Ace Champion, and I'm
the world's greatest Mooki-Pokko Master! It's great to see you all here!"
Lina's head rang as the cheers and adulation of the gathered younglings
rushed past her, to the Demiurge on stage. Now that she knew it was there
and knew how it felt, it was like standing in a river, a river flowing like
white water rapids. Penny caught her before she could fall over, but it
didn't make the pressure drop one iota.
Zoamel, however, stood his ground. He settled a glare at Ace Champion
that could have sliced through diamond. (And not just cute little diamond
rings, it probably could have vivisected MOUNTAINS of diamond.)
The younger Demiurge righted herself, pushed back against the flow. It
was just a matter of ignoring it again; she was too tied to it before to do
that, but if she shoved it in the back of her mind, forgetting about the
faith was easy enough. "So, you're the one Drake sent us for?" Lina called
out to him.
"Yes, I am the Demiurge of Fads," Ace announced, smiling all the time, a
media figure in the spotlight despite his words. "The god of trends and
desires, fans and fanatics. I see you've brought Zoamel Gustav with you. I
haven't seen you in a long time, Zoamel, not since I extinguished one of your
previous forms. Mint-san, please climb down now."
Mint looked at himself... he hadn't moved since Ace's arrival. "Right,
boss." He slowly lowered himself to the stage itself, eyes a little glazed
as he simply stood there, visions of profit obscuring his senses.
The children went quiet... still beaming smiles at the stage, still
waving, but they didn't cheer and didn't shriek. Ace had a seat on the edge
of the stage... as the children parted like the waters of a sea for him, he
walked over to meet the newcomers. "Don't worry about them," Ace said,
waving a hand dismissively at the crowd. "They're my followers. They only
have to see and hear what I want them to. And right now, they see me giving
them helpful lessons on how to raise and train their Mooki-Pokko!"
Penny clenched a fist. "You're CONTROLLING--"
"Easy, Penny," Lina warned, holding out an arm to stop her. "And you
too, Zoamel. You've got that whole barely restrained rage thing going on,
and this is NOT the time or place for a fight. Not with the kids around."
The young boy laughed. "True! I know you by heart, Lina Inverse. You
may have extremely questionable morals but you'd never allow a child to come
to harm like that."
"Do not trust this one, Lina," Zoamel warned, using words if he couldn't
use actions. "He's responsible for more inter-Demiurge wars than almost any
other one of our kind. He may appear a small child, but he is one of the
oldest gods."
"Don't listen to him, he's just sore after I had one of his previous
cults rendered obsolete by a new invention I promoted," Ace explained. "I
took his followers. He took it personally, but it's just healthy
competition, isn't it? It's not my fault that he likes to stay small. He
coddles and 'respects' his worshippers, never growing very strong, never
fighting the others to increase his flock--"
"Where's the Tooth Fairy?" Lina asked. "I could care less about the
history between you two. I'm on a mission here. Just tell me what I want to
know and I'll go away."
Ace Champion paused, not expecting that. "Really? That's it? I was
expecting a fight, what with Zoamel here, and you. You're a recent Demiurge,
aren't you? The Anti-Hero. The one who saves the day whether she wanted to
or not. The selfish savior."
"Yes, I am," Lina said. Calmly. "But I don't plan to be that for much
longer."
"It'll happen," Ace said, with a toothy, impish child's grin. "Whether
you want it to or not. I can feel it in you. All you--"
Fed up, Lina grabbed the kid by the shirt and throttled him. "Where's
the freaking Tooth Fairy, you brat?! You have any idea what I've been
through to get through this quest?"
She found herself holding an empty shirt. Ace Champion was back on
stage, back in the spotlight, where he was strongest -- and with a new shirt
on, one that was basically a walking advertisement for Mooki-Pokko. "Now,
that's more like it! Lina Inverse has a lot of spirit, I've heard. This is
going to be fun. I'll make a deal with you!"
"No, I'LL make a deal with you," Lina said, gathering flames to her
hand, rolling them tightly into a ball. "And the terms just changed! You
tell me what I want to know or you become Extra Crispy Fried Moopy-Pocky!
I'll give you to the count of three!"
"I--"
"THREE!"
Lina's ball extended, warped, a beam-like blast of orange power shooting
from her outstretched hands. She didn't have to content herself with the
standard fireball, and didn't feel like doing so -- the beam struck true...
and went through Ace, leaving no marks, no burns. As if he was a ghost.
Ace Champion laughed. "You're so funny! You can't defeat me that way!
Not here, in my temple. These children know the rules better than you do."
Penny snapped her fingers, making the connection. "You can only be
defeated in a Mooki-Pokko fight! Just like the kids dueling back in that
alley. It's stupid, since you could just sock the other guy in the nose, but
it's the only way to 'win' by the rules."
"What a bright girl!" Ace cheered, clapping for Penny. "You're cute!
Hmm. You know, you could make a great official Mooki-Pokko master... our
market appeal to girls isn't high enough, and--"
"Stuff it, kid," Lina ordered. "I get the idea. If we enter this big
tournament of yours tomorrow and beat you at your own game, you'll tell me
where the Tooth Fairy is. Is that it?"
"That's it," Ace agreed. "My champion Mooki-Pokko versus your own
champion. Of course, you'll have to defeat the other children to get to
me... I AM the Grand Dragon Champion, after all. A good, clean competition
between Demiurges!"
"This is ridiculous," Zoamel stated. "We will find the Tooth Fairy
another way rather than engage in such childish games, Fad King. I have no
intention of repeating--"
"I accept!" Lina announced. "Your champion Macky-Picker versus my
champion! Under those terms, I accept! I'll plow through whatever fights I
need to get what I want!"
Ace clapped for joy. "Great! Great! That's the spirit! I'll see you
tomorrow, Lina. And... I've never been beaten at my own game. It'll be so
much fun to see you try!"
Theatrics over, Ace simply vanished... and the children resumed talking,
as if nothing strange had happened. Lina kept an evil grin hidden, as she
worked her way through the crowd, to the door, despite her protesting
friends.
"Lina, this is not going to work," Zoamel told her, voice warning in
tone. "He controls this social phenomenon. Any Mooki-Pokko you try to buy
and use will likely turn against you. He may say he believes in clean
competition, but his idea of 'clean' would rival a Mazoku's sense of honor.
We will have to simply resume our investigation from square one."
"Oh, we're not entering a Mooki-Pokko," Lina said, her voice dancing
along playfully. "He didn't say we had to. He just said a 'champion'."
"Umm... I think it was implied," Penny said. "Although he didn't
specifically state--"
"What are Mooki-Pokko, anyway?" Lina asked. "Weird little monster
animal things. All I need is a weird monster animal thing that will obey my
orders and attack other weird monster animal things. And we've got that!"
"We do?" Penny asked.
"Of course!" Lina said, grinning ear to ear. She twirled on one boot,
and pointed dramatically... "Zoamel Gustav, I choose you!!"
The eldritch god of vengeance facefaulted.
[*]
While it's commonly known that Mazoku feed on the despair, sorrow, rage
and trauma of man's psyche, growing ever stronger from the fuel of negative
emotions hurled against them like adding fuel to a fire, it's not commonly
known that they nip off to enjoy a good curry every now and then.
At least, Xelloss was the sort to appreciate the finer points of human
cuisine. If you asked most Mazoku to define 'human cuisine' you'd probably
get a far different nutritional overview, but it would still involve lemon
sauce.
Currently, Xelloss was enjoying a two part meal, in the form of an
excellent curry dish, with just the right amount of spices and just the right
amount of sauce. He also was enjoying the royal chewing out the new waitress
was getting in the back room, for dropping a stack of dishes -- her sadness
at losing her only job, and the head chef's rage at the idiocy of children.
Perhaps his tune would be different, if he knew Xelloss engineered the little
accident, but that would deprive the Mazoku of his dessert!
He was JUST about to dive into the main course -- a prime roast rib,
draped in barbeque sauces and fit for the finest of kings -- when his
annoying little companion started raising a fuss with her yappy-yappy cawing
and cooing. Xelloss took bird in hand and reminded her of the pecking order.
"I am ATTEMPTING to have a very nice dinner," he explained. "And no, I
will not drop what I am doing and go beg Lina for the favor we need. It is
not the right time, she doesn't have an adequate amount of rage built up to
ply to our purposes. If I were to approach her or if she was to walk in
right now, I can't predict how it would go--"
"Come ON, Zoamel!" Lina whined, leading him reluctantly into the
restaurant. "You'll be perfect! I saw you cleaning house with Drake in your
full on hardcore nine inch curved teeth and scales and tentacles costume!
Just think of how easy this tournament would be with THAT on our side!"
"Ooooh, not good," Xelloss mumbled to himself. The closest exit was at
least twenty feet away, and he was one of the only patrons in the
restaurant... escape wasn't an option, nor was blending with the crowd. So,
he took a very human solution to the problem... and dove under the table and
hoped they'd go away.
"Lina, stop pestering Zoamel-sama!" Penny protested, pursing and pouting
her... lips. "He said no, and I'm sure he has his reasons!"
"Indeed. I have explained to you," Zoamel spoke, remaining calm but
firm as he was led through the restaurant. "I have played Ace's little games
before and have no intentions of playing them again. He is... a bad seed.
Him and Demiurges like him are the reason we are constantly at each other's
throats, engaging in holy war after holy war. Nothing good can come of it."
"You're such a pessimist!" Lina declared, exasperated. She looked
around... and spotted a table, already set with a SCRUMPTUOUS roast rib
dinner that nobody seemed to be eating. With glee, she hopped over, and had
a seat, taking up knife and fork. "C'mon, Zoamel, live a little."
Penny paused, perplexed at the predicament. "Uh, Lina, this looks like
someone else's dinner, you know..."
"I don't see anybody eating it, and I don't feel like waiting," Lina
explained. "If I can steal treasures of untold value and nosh down on fine
foods, I'm willing to combine the two and steal food. It's my divine right,
and I'm starving. Sit, sit."
"...so it is. However, Lina, it's not my lot in life to 'live'," Zoamel
balked, as he slowly sat down at the table. "I'm a god. We don't exactly
live. We--"
"Drake lived," Lina said, waving a fork at him as she cut off a slice of
ribs. "I've been thinking about this stuff. You're both Demiurges... but
Drake gets in with his followers, walks amoung 'em and talks to 'em and works
with them. He's a people Demiurge. But you... when we found you, Zoamel,
weren't you just sort of looking on from on high? We had to practically
light a bomb under your ass to get you to do anything. You were just doing a
few small tasks for your cult, not anything they could use to peg your
existence. You didn't interact with them."
Zoamel sighed. "Yes. That is my modus. Your point, Lina?"
"My POINT is that Demiurges aren't slaves to their followers," Lina
explained. "Drake wasn't. He was an equal with 'em. I don't see why you
have to be so high and mighty, or why I have to be this force of nature with
no consciousness like I was before. Drake LED his friends to war--"
"To war!" Zoamel barked, his cool dropping quickly, as he banged a fist
on the table. (The table went 'Ow.') "I have no intentions of repeating
THAT error, god of vengeance or not! Let me achieve my follower's needs from
afar, so they never have to see a 'holy war' head on! I'd sooner dissolve
and fade into the memory of humanity than cause more of my flock to... to..."
The table fell silent. The people around it did as well. Lina actually
paused in shoveling away food, and as many can attest to, it takes quite an
event to get Lina to stop eating.
Penny's lower lip trembled... as she put a hand over Zoamel's fist.
"Zoamel... what do you mean? What happened? I've never seen you this
angry!"
The god as ancient as time itself let out a tired sigh, and seemed to
sink into his chair. His fist unclenched, folding out to take Penny's hand.
"...it happened long ago. It's not of importance."
Lina waved a fork. "Something's eating at you, Zo, and I have a feeling
it involves our good buddy Ace Champion back there. He said he conflicted
with you before, and this is the first time I've seen you talk smack about
another Demiurge. Just give us the story and let us decide if it's
important. Got it?"
"Yes... yes. I will summarize. You would be bored with most of the
details," Zoamel warned, trying to downplay things. But the soft tone of his
voice spoke of seriousness, and not the typical firm and resolute seriousness
he usually carried... "At one time, most primitive cultures in the world were
working with bronze tools and weapons. There were many wars between the
various tribes, but nobody had an upper hand. I myself was a snake-god over
a fairly large culture, in a river valley. As you say, I got involved with
them the way Drake does... as their ruler and benevolent overlord. I did my
best to ensure fairness in all dealings, but I was younger then... and not as
patient.
"One day, Ace Champion -- although he came in a very different form
then, that of a hawk god -- arrived with an army at my people's doorstep.
They held new inventions of his devising, weapons made of something called
'iron'. Iron saturated their lives, it was their reason to exist, like
fanatics. He was personally leading this army, in the physical form of a
great flaming hawk... and he ordered my people to stand down and surrender to
the will of the iron age..."
"And you refused," Lina supplied, seeing where this was going.
"I didn't want to lose my flock," Zoamel explained. "But not because I
loved them. In my mind, it was a war of gods, and whoever has the most
followers in the end wins. I dismissed iron as a passing fad... and within a
week they were dead, or converted. All of them. Every single one of my
believers that stood by me in my blind desire to win a war were killed, and
the ones that turned against me... I'm pleased that they did, in hindsight,
for they lived, even if it was under the bloodthirsty, competitive tyranny of
Ace. I faded out into obscurity while wailing at my own despair, realizing
far too late how much they meant to me, and what my folly cost them..."
The god was nearly broken by the end of the story. His composure was
firm, but not nearly as firm as it usually was. And he was holding Penny's
hand quite tightly.
".....so you stayed away from your followers from then on," Lina
realized. "If they never had a godhead to rally behind, and you just nudged
them occasionally, you wouldn't get them all killed in a mistake."
"All of Drake's followers are gone now," Zoamel spoke. "He didn't learn
what I did. If you get too close... you will hurt or be hurt. That is the
cost of being a god."
"Bullshit."
"--excuse me?" Zoamel blurted, surprised.
"I don't buy it," Lina said. "Yes, you could potentially screw up and
get your followers slaughtered, but LOOK at your cult, man! They're
pathetic! They shuffle through rituals, recite prayers and try to get some
vengeance all to please you, and don't really get a thing out of it. Maybe
they don't even want vengeance, but without any revelations to guide 'em,
it'll just keep going and going with the same old schtick. If *I* were a
Demiurge--"
"You are a Demiurge," Zoamel reminded.
"What I MEAN is that I wouldn't just stay the hell away and not deal
with real people. I say what I mean and I say it to who I'm being mean to--
I mean, I say things right to people. I don't think I could be ME and not
get involved; that ghost wandering around acting like Lina for twenty years
wasn't me, for certain! I'm getting involved right now, aren't I, like when
I saved that train? It was a thrill, and I got free food and gifts and
everybody went home happy. And YOU'RE involved directly too, on this quest
for your believers! So quit playing the meek card to avoid a chance at
messing up, and get involved. Help us win this tournament!"
"Yeah, yeah!" Penny cheered, being the Morale Officer for this merry
bunch. "Let's do it, Zoamel! I bet you'll scare the stuffing out of all
those weird little animals. It's not like going to war. Nobody gets hurt."
"Someone will," Zoamel stated, voice gloomy. "I can forsee it. But...
you raise valid points, Lina. I'll have to think about them for some time
before I make up my mind. In the meantime... I will help. But I won't
fight."
"RIGHT!.... what?" Lina exclaimed / asked for clarification.
"Trust me," Zoamel said.. with a slight smile. "I believe I can
achieve the task my own way: or rather, Penny's way."
"Oh, no need to thank me," Penny beamed, turning a deep red.
"Now, I believe the young lady requires some dinner, even if I do not,
and we have talked long enough. If there are no more revelations, I suggest
you order her food, given that you've miraculously consumed an entire rib
dinner in between lecturing me."
Lina dabbed at her mouth daintily with a napkin, and stretched out.
"Yeah, yeah, well, food wants to be in Lina's stomach and waits for no one.
So if there aren't any MORE revelations--"
Her boot thumped into something that went 'Ow.'
Curious, Lina reached under the table, fished around like hunting for a
bar of soap in the bath and pulled up a purple and gray haired Mazoku.
"This is a terribly embarrassing dramatic entrance," Xelloss admitted.
[*]
"...as you see, our sales are nearly four times what they were just
last month," Mint Endo continued, showing pie chart after bar graph after
line graph after...
Ace Champion leaned back in his chair, feet on the expensive conference
table. "This is boring. I already know that the number of Mooki-Pokko fans
are increasing every day. That's all that matters."
"No, no, boss, you're not seeing what I'm saying," Mint explained.
"We're rapidly approaching market saturation. Soon, there just won't be any
more Mooki-Pokko items left to collect, because the kids will have bought at
least one of everything. Look, I know you're just a kid, if a very gifted
one for gimmick design, but take it from an elder merchant -- if this keeps
up people will get bored with Mooki-Pokko. The fad will die out."
Ace declined to correct the man on his age. Endo worked much better
for him when he didn't know he was in the employ of a god, and his simple
mind was VERY easy to flush selective thoughts from. "Yes, I know. I know
better than you do. I'm sure we could get the resources from our ally if we
pushed for them... but even if we had the resources to mass-produce these
toys, and distribute them across the world, it wouldn't last for more than a
few years. No, we need a new paradigm."
Mint paused, unsettled. (Where did the kid learn the word paradigm?)
"Yes, exactly. A new fad. You have any ideas? I, ah, had this idea I've
been working on for a few years... a sort of a game, with paper and pencils
where you play adventurers--"
"Booooooring!" Ace declared. "People want something active! Something
hyperactive! Something so energizing they completely forget their dull,
stupid little lives, and sink into it like a drug whenever they feel bad.
Mooki-Pokko's great for kids, but we need something that's a pleasure for all
ages. And I think I have it."
Mint's mind started to think: this kid is pretty clever. Because it
was easier than him thinking: something's wrong with this picture, and Ace
liked things easy. "What's your idea, boss?"
Ace pulled a full-color poster out of his jacket. It didn't
technically exist, but he wasn't the sort to bother with pencils and paints
and papers. He unrolled it on top of the conference table, looking smug.
The poster was loaded with vibrant colors... sweet and pure pink, daisy
white, sun yellow, and royal purple. It depicted a young girl, smiling with
delight and innocence as she waved to the viewer, while wearing an adorably
frilly dress that made her look a lot like a piece of candy. Her long blonde
pigtail twirled behind her in a very picturesque way.
And the caption read "FIRST CONCERT LOVE FOR YOU DASH!".
"I give the world... the Idol Singer," Ace Champion declared, a slow
and gremlinesque grin crawling across his face. "A girl who never matures,
never loses innocence. Someone the teeming masses can always approve of, and
wish to be like! A musical messiah! It's perfect! And all the emotions the
fools pour onto her, all their unsatisfied desires and dreams, it'll all go
to ME, by proxy. We'll have to get our people to work harder on musical
recording processes, but once it's ready, we can sell HUNDREDS of songs. And
once one idol is used up, we toss her aside and get new ones. With THIS,
properly cultivated of course, we can claim the world through the power of
media!"
Confusion etched into Mint Endo's face. The fog over his mind wasn't
helping. "What, you mean like a bard? They'd travel town to town and sing
tales of heroes and stuff for food and lodging?"
"No, you mortal idiot, not some dirty old BARD," Ace growled. "Bards
are wandering, impoverished beggars. An idol is an unreachable peak of
perfection. But I'm not expecting you to understand -- you just do the
boring work for me. The Mooki-Pokko project is going to die out soon, and
we'll need our Idol ready. Someone we can train and program to carry out the
stage instructions and smile for the unwashed masses. And I know just the
girl for it..."
[*]
"Who is this guy?" Penny asked, peering curiously at the newcomer that
Lina had in a Reverse Tongan Death Grip Chinlock Sleeper Hold (easily
comboable into an Inverted Atomic Drop or a Sidewalk Slam).
"He's a VERY annoying Mazoku who has a bad habit of making my life more
complicated than it needs to be!!" Lina declared, keeping a GOOD grip on
Xelloss's noggin, despite his weak attempts to shake free. "Spill it, Xel!
What were you doing under my table?"
"Ah, that is a--"
"Don't forget, I can still cast Laguna Blade. Or at least something
just as nasty as it."
"I've been following you for awhile now," Xelloss said quickly... while
waving an olive branch with a white flag and a dove perched on it, in a quick
illusion spell. "Can I please have a seat? You're starting to crush my
larynx. And besides, you owe me -- I'm the one who swerved those bullets
away from you in Darata, you know."
Zoamel frowned, in distaste. "As weak as the Mazoku may be now, they
are still a danger. Do not trust him, Lina."
"Trust? Xelloss?" Lina asked, trying to put two words together like a
square peg in a spherical hole. "Please, Zoamel, give me a little more
respect than that. I trust him about as far as I can spit a rat. But he's
not the sort to stick a knife in your head when you're looking away, so he's
safe for now. Sit your ass down, Xel."
The gray haired Mazoku thankfully took a seat, adjusting his robes. He
raised his staff, letting the raven perch on it, as it had been fluttering
around in a frenzy before. "Good, good. I really wish you hadn't found me,
Lina, the timing just isn't very optimal--"
"Bite me, Xel. Now what's going on?"
"I suppose now will be as good a time as any," he said, with a sigh.
He made himself as presentable as possible, ready to issue the wording he'd
tumbled over in his head for weeks on end. "Ahem. Lina Inverse... speaking
on behalf of the Mazoku, I'd like you to destroy the Sairaag Empire for us.
...please."
Lina stared at Xelloss as if he had grown a third head and learned to
play the polka using only his kneecaps. "You? You WHAT? Want me to WHAT?
For WHO?"
Xelloss pouted. "Is it really hard to understand? Surely you've heard
the rumors, the stories of how Sairaag put the Big Hurt on the Mazoku race.
They're unfortunately quite true. If we mounted an all out assault with all
surviving Mazoku on the Sairaag capital, right now, we just might achieve a
stalemate. We're about as menacing as two kids and a dog right now. So, the
race of demonic evil slathering beasts would really appreciate it if you
could take a few days out of your journey and burn Sairaag down to its
foundations. Will you? I was hoping to ask you later, after they'd caused a
thousand and one problems for you, prompting you to gleefully agree, to be
frank. Please don't make me say please again."
The table went quiet. Lina continued to peer closely at Xelloss --
close enough to lick him. (Not that she did. This is not that kind of
tale.)
"...that was a secret, wasn't it?" Lina asked. "You just told a huge
secret after only being lightly manhandled by me. I didn't even have to
dangle you upside down over a pit of scorpions. Something huge MUST be up."
"Yes, it's called 'extermination of my kind', and we'd like to avoid
it," Xelloss said frankly, with a little depressed sigh for emphasis.
"Hence, I've had to compromise my protocol a bit. Right now, we feel you're
tactically the best person for the job. You're a Demiurge -- yes, we know
about that, and a very powerful one. More powerful than any we have on
record. It wouldn't take too long, just a day or so ride from here to lay
the ever loving smack down on--"
"No."
"Do I REALLY have to say 'please' again?"
"I'm busy, Xel," Lina said. "I have my own quest here. I'm becoming
human again. You knew that already, though, didn't you? If you've really
been following me this far. The LESS I antagonize Sairaag, the better.
...I'll agree with you, they're a bunch of little bastards and if they get in
my way, they go down. But seek them out? No. Not interested."
Zoamel cleared his throat. "I will second that. I have my own grudge
against Sairaag, for the extermination of MY kind, rather than yours. And
thus, I will not act on your request. I act on the request of my followers,
and see no need to participate in tandem with a demon to carry out their
wishes."
Xelloss tapped the table, in irritation, and tapped his staff on the
ground in time. "I could threaten to zap you folks, I suppose," he
suggested. A tiny spark formed at the tip of his staff, boiling with
darkness and the skimmed taint on reality... until the staff piffled out and
went flaccid. Literally. "Oh, poop," he muttered, disappointed, shaking the
droopy staff, trying to get it hard again.
Lina smirked, leaning on one arm. "Boy, you really ARE a magical
eunuch now. How the heck did this happen?"
"Oh, they had a fight at the north pole, Lina, remember?" Penny filled
in, feeling the need to be part of this conversation.
"Yeah, yeah, but the HOW is still eluding me," Lina said. "How a bunch
of scrawny little humans took you guys down so low. Spill it, Xel. It might
get me sympathetic to your cause."
Xelloss rubbed his chin, in thought. "Yes. Yes, it would, indeed.
It's a rather large secret, but needs be when the devil drives, I suppose.
And perhaps it'll show exactly how large a threat Sairaag truly is. Pardon
my dramatic emphasis, it's just my little fun with storytelling... let me set
the scene for you. There was snow, there was sky, and little else. But over
the snow, the sky..."
[*]
The sky was the color of death.
Many people assume that black is the color of death, but this is just
because they're stupid. In actuality, cultures that roamed the world more
than a thousand years ago (before the great Mazoku War when the demon king of
the north launched part of Shaburanigdo into battle) felt that white was the
color of death. White, like the ice that started to overtake the world, the
breath of Dynast, great Mazoku Lord of the Northern Wastes.
Of course, the war ended, humanity rebuilt, and Dynast was not seen
again after having his metaphysical ass handed to him on a platter.
Oh, how he hoped today would change that.
The great lord hadn't been getting his exercise, and sat on a throne
carried by this finest enslaved warriors of darkness -- all thirty of them,
because of his tremendous fat bulk. He sat on the finest pelts made from the
finest golden human hairs woven from a thousand children, and kept a human
female slave under each arm for company and other services.
Long ago, someone called him 'The most stereotypically perverted evil
bastard I've ever laid eyes on,' but he had long since decided to take it as
a compliment.
He had a fine vantage point to overview the battle. Five hundred of his
kin, his finest Mazoku, were ready to kill -- he'd left the bush leaguers
back at the Underground Castle of Frozen Pain, a name he'd recently picked
out to give the place a bit of cheer. Five hundred would CERTAINLY do
against a mere two thousand humans.
Humans!
HUMANS had challenged him. Openly challenged him! They had sent one
of their strange flying contraptions all the way to the north, with one
mission -- find the hidden Mazoku Lord, Dynast, and give him an invitation to
war. He'd killed the messengers slowly over the course of a month after
receiving the declaration, but had to thank them for amusing him. HUMANS
wanted to war with him! A formal battle, one line to the left, one line to
the right, and a trumpeting charge to clash in the middle. Only humans could
think of something as inane as a polite, rule-abiding little war.
It amused him to such end that he agreed in full, even to the rules.
Sure, he would have to come out of retirement after that whole little war
debacle with the dragons an aeon ago, but this was TOO fun to pass up.
And there he was, lined up, his demonic horde slathering and flailing
tentacles and so on, just waiting to devour and/or ravish and/or flay the
humans who had traveled all this distance for the honor of dying by Dynast's
hand.
Such a rag-tag lot, they were. Flying the colors of the city twice
annihilated, Sairaag, and wearing armor unlike he'd ever seen before. War
machines he'd never witnessed. Quite a spunky bunch, and if he wasn't a
fully astral supported Mazoku Lord, he might have worried. Yet, his spies
said they sensed no powerful magics amount them. Not a drop. It would be an
absolute slaughter.
Briefly, he considered sending his army down there before they sounded
the formal trumpet, but it amused him more to let them think they had a
chance...
"You amuse yourself far too much, Dynast."
He didn't need to turn to look; and for that matter, he couldn't, given
his immense bulk. "Do my ears deceive me, if I truly had ears through which
to hear?" Dynast asked, in his high pitched prissy voice (not that anyone
would say it to his face). "If it is not my good 'sister', the Beastmaster.
It has been SO long, Zelas. You never write."
His slaves rotated the throne, so he could gaze on the floating figure
of elegance, the ultimate predator, in all her splendor. She tapped
cigarette ash off her long-stemmed smoke, her well-groomed fur shawl snarling
at the fat man.
"And I see you've brought your favorite toy," he added, dismissing the
'priest' out of hand. It was strange, however, the look on his face. One of
concern, and yet, some inward secret pleasure... but that was typical for
Xelloss.
"So, what precisely is going on?" Zelas-Metallum asked. "My servant
Xelloss suggested we drop in and watch the show. Is it true? You're
pandering to the humans? I thought you vowed to be ensconced in the ice
until the next time our king rises."
"Yes, well, I needed some fresh air. How fare the others? The spoiled
brat?"
"Dead."
Dynast flinched. "Dead? Hellmaster Phibrizo dead? My word. I
suppose the renegade half-breed finally got to him, then--"
"No, actually, Gaav is dead as well," Zelas sighed, knowing exactly how
much this would unsettle Dynast. "Phibrizo slew Gaav shortly before the Lord
of Nightmares herself annihilated the boy. You really ought to keep up on
current events, Dynast, even if you do prefer to be a shut-in. It's what
spies are for, yes?"
".....good riddance to rubbish," Dynast bit off. "The three remaining
lords surely can see these skirmishes out to the last. Share wine, Zelas.
Enjoy the show. I believe we are about to be attacked, as amusing as the
concept is."
"One of these days," Zelas warned, her tone dropping from playful
menace to coldness that rivaled the ice, "You will amuse yourself to death,
Dynast. Come, Xelloss. I have seen enough."
"Oh, I think we should say," Xelloss piped in with, watching the
bristling, anxious army. "I've been keeping an eye on this new power in
Sairaag, and find it very interesting. It can't hurt, can it? Please,
please, can we please please can we huh? I'll be your best friend!"
A sharp trumpet line rang out across the tundra. At the INSTANT of the
sound, war cries arouse from the human army, waving swords, and starting to
charge blindly through the snow.
"I missed the start!" Dynast whined. He waved his orders into effect,
a flick of an oversized thumb. "I'll never forgive you for that, Zelas.
Minions, forward."
The Mazoku shrieked and wailed like raging beasts, to try and
intimidate the human army. But not a single one of the mortals stopped, or
even slowed in the assault. So, both sides raced to clash...
And then the humans turned a sharp one eighty and ran for it.
"HA! I knew it. They run!" Dynast laughed. "Forward! I want to
follow them myself! Push on, slaves!"
"Do not be hasty..." Zelas tried to warn, but the throne bearers were
fast, catching up with the army, blending into the mass.
One army chased the other, like two blobs across the plains the color
of death. The human mass split in half, two parties... flanking around a
particularly large snow dune.
Dynast pondered it, curiously. He had examined this terrain not three
days previous, and there was no dune of that size when--
The snow exploded outward, a gigantic catapult hidden under a tarp. It
unfolded, snapping into full functional order, a payload of a single greyish
white sphere with a purple cross embossed on it at the ready...
TWANG! And off it was. Dynast wasn't quite sure what this was about,
as clearly it didn't FEEL magical, and even if it was coming straight for him
the best a big lump of rock could do was--
The ball impacted hard against the throne, plowing it twenty feet into
the snow. Both armies stopped dead, in surprise, the Mazoku feeling through
their master's link that something was very, very wrong.
Dynast was dying.
A roaring geometric ball of black astral energy screamed out of the
dunes, Dynast's true astral Mazoku form, trying to GET AWAY from the
flickering lightning that was sucking him down into the ball. The sound
shattered eardrums -- but the humans didn't even flinch, helmets already
designed to absorb the sound they were expecting...
Zelas-Metallum stared in open-jaw horror. "What is going on!? His
form is collapsing! That's impossible!"
"Oh my, how interesting," Xelloss said, quite calm. "I wonder if he's
going to die soon?"
The shape of absolute darkness (yet not beyond pitch) howled a final
cry... and then was sucked down into the ball, annihilated. Silence fell
across the snow. Mazoku, severed from Dynast's power, started to realize
something, something that none of them had taken seriously in the span of
history.
Humans were about to destroy them.
[*]
"It was a slaughter, indeed," Xelloss spoke, in low, ghost-story tones.
"The Mazoku were leaderless and cut off from their master, while the humans
moved with absolute confidence. They carried white disks with purple
crosses, which wiped out any Mazoku they touched. I managed to escape, of
course, but not before one of the weapons destroyed most of Zelas-Metallum's
form -- and drained some of my essence in the process. The bird you see
before you is all that remains of her. And that is the end. That's how the
humans crippled the Mazoku. The rest of us ran into hiding, hoping to avoid
that fate, and then we started to fade, as humans stopped believing in us--"
"WAIT!" Lina shouted, waving her arms. "This is impossible. Okay.
You say they used white disks with purple crosses? That's a weapon to kill a
Demiurge, Xelloss, not a Mazoku! It couldn't have worked--"
"Ah, but it did," Xelloss spoke, waving a finger to silence Lina. "And
the larger model successfully eradicated Dynast in full. I didn't quite
understand it myself, as I pondered the outcome for weeks. But as I said, we
started to fade. The story of the war spread, and people stopped believing
the Mazoku were a threat. Isn't it obvious, Lina? Isn't it as clear as day?
We feed on the fear and despair of mankind, in belief that tomorrow will
never come. We tap our strength from Shaburanigdo, the Demon King, whether
he be divided and dead or living and walking. We are extensions of the dark
god, his spawn, his unholy children. Children of a GOD. You see....
Shaburangido is a Demiurge."
The silence that clenched the restaurant tightened to a painful grip.
"...that is absolutely, utterly impossible," Zoamel spoke, his voice
near trembling as his world shattered. "A Demiurge is a Demiurge. We are
gods over MAN! We are not like... like Shaburanigdo. We are not demons with
a thirst for destruction. It makes no sense!"
"Oh?" Xelloss asked. "It makes perfect sense to me. Only your false
assumptions about our 'amazing power' block you from accepting the
revelation. The ultimate form of nihilism embodied is the form of
Shaburanigdo. The fear of world destruction. The HUMAN faith in the horrors
of death. We live off your faith of the darkness, the faith you refuse to
admit you hold true. Shaburangido, the god, is simply an extremely powerful
Demiurge, perhaps THE most powerful one other than Ceipheed, the Dragon King.
It's true. The disks may have proven to work just as well on Dragons, but
the Dragons were smart. After the fight with Dynast, they went into hiding,
patient enough to try and wait for humans to forget about this new power.
Silly, isn't it? Once Sairaag has dominated with this technology, the
Dragons will find they have no place in the new world order. After all...
who needs the gods, be they light or dark, when you have the science that
rendered them obsolete?"
Lina sat rock still, looking at the tablecloth. Her head span with
thoughts. Horrified thoughts, calculating thoughts, fears and hopes... and
questions. Far too many questions. "Penny... you say Sairaag is one of
those happy go lucky world domination types. How much so? Do you think they
have a chance at running the entire world?"
It took a moment to shake Penny out of the confusion she was in. "Ah...
well... actually, yes. Yes. If Xelloss-san is right, then yes. I guess..
nothing could really stop them, could it? It's gone too far now. There
isn't anyone strong enough, if even Shaburanigdo can't do anything..."
"That's where you come into play, Lina Inverse," Xelloss reminded,
urgently. "We think you can do it. There's something special about you,
about your power and how it came about. Ever since the crash of the Mazoku
I've made it my MISSION in life to study the Demiurges, how they work, what
they do. If you were to attack Sairaag--"
"I can't do that," Lina spoke quietly.
"Haven't I proven they are a threat??" Xelloss blurted, actually showing
annoyance. "What more do you need? We must strike, and strike hard! Penny
is right; it's almost too late. Almost!"
"...it won't work, if we try," Lina said. "Listen to me, Xelloss. I'm
the anti-hero. Reluctant savior. I'm not the one who goes blazing into the
front gates to save the world the minute she hears it's in trouble. If I try
that, I'm... well, I'm sort of Amelia, I guess. And it won't work."
Zoamel considered that, rapping his fingers on the table, in sequence.
"It... makes a sort of sense, Lina. We find our strength in our roles. I
can find strength against Sairaag, as I've been asked by my followers to
punish our enemies, and they are the enemy. But if I had gone on some other
geas from my temple, something simpler, I would have no chance."
"I can't just up and leave my quest to go blow up Sairaag," Lina said,
nodding along with Zoamel. "I'd fail miserably. Here's what we're going to
do, people. We're going to continue to seek out the Tooth Fairy. I'm still
going to try to become human. And... if this works like EVERY other world-
saving quest I've been on... it'll all work out, somehow. We get
sidetracked, something comes up, I'm FORCED into a situation. And then I'll
manage to pull it off, when all the cards are down and I'm pushed to a wall.
That's how it works. Is it agreed?"
"This isn't like you, Lina," Xelloss warned. "You're NEVER this
introspective, not to the point of questioning how you do things. Have you
really changed so much, since becoming a Demiurge?"
"You know what? I have no idea," Lina said, with a weak smile. "I'm
just making this up as I go along and trying not to get killed. But that's a
pretty Lina thing to do, isn't it?"
Xelloss smiled, back to his happy bastard mode of facial expressions.
"Yes. Yes, it is. Bravo, Lina. I will go with this plan... as long as it
seems to be working, or rather, not working as the case may be. Quite a
puzzle."
With a final breath of relief, Lina pushed her chair out, and got to her
feet. "Let's just put this out of our heads, people. Stick to the quest at
hand and let whatever power over drama I've got sort things out. If we try
too hard, it might not play right. So goal number one : Defeat Ace Champion
at the Mooki-Pokko tournament. Goal number two : Find the Tooth Fairy and
beat an explanation out of him. Goal number three : Turn me human. But I
guess goal number zero is we all get to BED. It's damn late and I'm pooped!
Everybody to your rooms, and crash for at least eight hours. I get this
feeling tomorrow's gonna be a little crazy."
"Agreed," Zoamel said, rising as well. "Xelloss, you may join me in my
inn room. Specifically because I want to keep an eye on you. I don't trust
Mazoku, even if your words make sense to me."
"Oh, thank you," Xelloss thanked. "I could use a little fear, mistrust
and suspicion to keep my juices flowing. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Say, Penny, would you like to join us? I'm sure Zoamel's bed has enough
room!"
The young Gabriev turned a deep red. "Why.. why you--" she raised a
hand, the Cute Girl Slap Effect When A Pervert Bugs Her coming into play...
Lina smashed a wooden chair over Xelloss's head instead. The Mazoku
went down like a lead balloon.
"Neee, if you're going to be the spawn of MY loins, Penny, you've got to
learn what tools are right for the job," she chided, tossing the wrecked
chair aside. "And the right tool is always the one that's total overkill for
the task at hand. Got it?"
"Got it!" Penny chirped.
[*]
The moon is as the moon does; it glows brightly in the night sky. It
glows through thin clouds, it gets blocked by thick ones, it rises in the
evening and sets in the morning. Consistent and predictable, you can always
rely on the moon to behave in a certain way.
Still, one could argue that maybe the moonlight was just a LITTLE
brighter over Atlas City that evening. Maybe it was the excitement about the
next day's tournament. Maybe it was the romantic, thoughtful mood it set up,
which had Penny pondering her life, and her situation, as she got ready for a
good night's rest.
She had unbraided her hair, to comb it and wash it earlier, and was now
carefully rebraiding while looking out at said lunar object. The process
took a lot of time, since her hair was longer than Lina's or Gourry's in
their heyday. So, she had plenty of time to think.
Penny didn't want to bring it up to Lina, but... she felt a bit like a
fifth wheel. Or a third wheel. Or whatever count seemed appropriately
inappropriate. Today had only brought that out more, with her barely saying
anything, while Lina and Zoamel made all the big decisions.
What had Penny managed to do, over the course of Lina's great quest?
She'd been a decent informational resource, but any travel guide could have
done that. Every fight she got into she messed up. Every time she tried to
deal with their enemies, she got treated like a little kid! And worst of all
-- what was the POINT of wanting to be a great warrior with a neat customized
pike if she never got to use it?
All her life, she'd wanted to be an adventuress. Swashbuckling, heroic,
victorious. But here she was on her first huge adventure and it was nothing
like she had expected; no running battles through city streets, no great
clashes of skilled fighters and mages. Mostly she sat around and reacted to
things the others did. Was this really how adventures went? Lina didn't
seem to care that things weren't fitting into Penny's paradigm, and Lina was
the expert around here, so that must just be the way REAL quests go...
So, where did that leave Penny Gabriev? A fighter who wasn't able to
fight with this league of enemies. She knew no magic, either. What good was
she going to be? What use was she?
A clunk sound alerted her to potential danger. She twisted in her seat,
holding her comb and brush defensively, ready to give the enemy a makeover it
would never forget... and then felt a bit silly for it. All that had really
happened was her pack falling over, as the Wandering Monster Table had gotten
free again.
"Poor fella," Penny cooed, picking up the table and stroking its stone
top a bit, which always seemed to calm the thing down. "All cooped up like
that. You haven't had much to do either, have you? Not since helping us
define Lina as a Demiurge..."
"Human!" the table chimed, as it was in contact with Penny's body, and
she was in fact quite human.
"All you can do is tell facts," she spoke aloud, continuing to comfort
her little Table-chan. "Just like all I can do is tell Lina facts about this
world, while she handles everything. But I guess you're not too sad about
it, are you? I mean, your expression is so... stony."
"Human!" Table-chan repeated. "Bipedal primary species!"
"I want to see Lina finish her quest... but maybe I'm just getting in
the way," Penny said, talking to herself for the most part. "Zoamel and Lina
have everything in hand. Zoamel's so great; he can do anything!... even help
Lina adjust to this world, I guess. Maybe my old sempai was right. Maybe
I'm not cut out to be some kind of heroine... naybe I should just go home,
Table-chan. This isn't really my quest, is it? It's Lina's."
"Capable of using tools! Opposable thumbs!"
Penny set the table on her head, it's preferred perch. The table
settled in comfortably, as she continued to ponder aloud. "Mom and Dad are
really worried, I bet... I don't get along with them, but I don't want to
hurt them. Although they'll be mad at me, too... I don't know, Table-chan.
Should I stay or should I go? What reason is there for me to keep going with
Lina and Zoamel?.."
A glow near her hand drew Penny's eyes to her portable mirror... where
she saw the table glow, slightly...
"New data collected. Processing: Romantic feelings for Zoamel Gustav,
Demiurge!" the Table discerned.
"Wh-what?!" Penny blurted.
"Human, bipedal species, specific designation Penny Gabriev, doubting
current usefulness, but has hero worship for Lina Inverse!" the Table
expanded, sounding almost proud of its skills. "Romantic feelings for Zoamel
Gustav! Allergic to shellfish! Emotionally vulnerable to chocolate!"
"...but how did you...?" Penny asked.
Before she could get an answer, she felt a sharp little prick in her
neck, and her world went black.
Mysteriously silent figures in black -- with no identifying
characteristics aside from Mooki-Pokko deck pouches at their belts -- quickly
stuffed up the drugged girl into a sack, pet table and all. In less than a
minute, they were gone.
[*]
A figure, just as mysterious but decidedly less black, crept about the
inn scant hours after that. He was also trying to escape without notice, but
carried nothing with him except for his sole posession -- a mask.
He fingered it lightly, intending to get out without any incident. but
ready to use it if so needed. That's why when a light spell floated over his
head, turning a room dark as pitch into daylight, he snapped the mask on, and
nearly filled the room with the essence of the monstrous Zoamel Gustav.
"FOOLISH MORT--"
"Cut that out, you'll wake someone up," Lina muttered, unimpressed. She
leaned in the doorway of Penny's room, looking at the monster. "You're gonna
do great at the tournament if you can keep your game face on, you know.
That's even better than your ravenous demon act in Darata."
Zoamel downshifted, pulling off the mask and returning to his handsome
human form. But he retained a dark look about his aspect, a glowering
expression. "I no longer wish to participate in Ace's little game tomorrow.
The situation has changed. He has--"
"Kidnapped Penny, I know," Lina said, holding up a note. "He left me
one too. How he's taken her to 'increase the stakes' in our competition, and
we'll only get her back if we win the tournament... although mine's also
personalized to point out how useless of a Demiurge I am, and how she's not
really my daughter and so on. I'm guessing yours is pushing other buttons?"
"...yes," Zoamel responded, fingering the note in his pocket. "We must
rescue her immediately, Lina. Ace is not to be trusted--"
"I know, that's why we're not going to do anything," Lina said. "Your
pal Ace isn't real subtle. He WANTS us to barge on in there and fight him
head on over this, just like you were about to do. I thought you said you
didn't want to play his little game?"
"This is different," Zoamel rationalized. "We must act, and act now--"
"Who's leading this expedition?" Lina asked, stepping into the room, to
confront him. "I'll give you a hint -- she's short, has a fiery temper and a
big appetite. You called the shots in Darata, and I went along with it even
if I didn't like it, because I trusted you. Now you've got to trust me.
I've got a hunch on this, that we have to play this scenario out. The only
way out is through. We go to the tournament and beat Ace as planned."
"You would knowingly walk into a trap?" Zoamel asked.
"I like to think of it as picking my traps," Lina mused, smiling. "And
tomorrow's tournament is a less dangerous trap than a midnight raid. I've
had to knowingly walk right into traps before in order to win -- when
Phibrizo had set up this huge chain of events for us to follow, and we knew
Xelloss was leading us to a bad situation, there wasn't really any other
choice. Besides... Penny's an Inverse. We don't take well to kidnapping,
and if they're holding her IN that arena, at the heart of Ace's base of
operations... this could be the best thing to happen to us."
Zoamel flexed his fingers, barely restrained displeasure at the
situation quite clear in body language. "You are choosing to gamble a great
deal on your instincts, Lina Inverse..."
"That's what I do," Lina said, poking a finger at Zoamel's chest. "You
take calculated vengeance, I dive into the thick fireballs blazing and come
through with amazing luck in the end. This is my quest, and it's high time I
took command. Are you going to trust me?"
Zoamel considered her words. They made sense, as he was a logical
Demiurge, and understood that what seems-to-be or should-become is often more
important than what-really-is. But something nagged at him... an alien anger
that demanded he press on anyway, against all logic. Something that wanted
to blaze in, tear the arena apart and save Penny...
He pushed that down. For now.
"I trust you," he concluded. "You should resume resting. We will need
all our power and focus tomorrow to defeat Ace once and for all."
"Oh, I've stopped sleeping," Lina said, matter of factly. "I don't
really have to, anyway, since I'm a god. And it lets me practice my powers
and read and go out shopping and so on..."
Zoamel quirked a metaphorical nonexistent eyebrow given physical form by
virtue of faith and so on. "One might think you are getting used to being a
Demiurge, Lina Inverse."
Lina gave pause. (She gave 1.47 pauses, to be specific.) But then
shrugged it off, quite casual in appearance. "I am what I am," she stated.
"For now. I'd be stupid not to take advantage of it while I've got it. Now,
we have about five hours to dawn, and seven to the tournament. It's time to
practice our Mappy-Pokey Grand Dragon Champion Master Whatsimajigger skills.
Are you up for it, my loyal animal companion?"
The elder god allowed himself a slight smile.
"I suppose."
---------------
five part three
---------------
The sun is as the sun does; it shines. It shines through thin clouds,
it gets blocked by thick ones...
But the sun technically had absolutely nothing to do with the situation
at hand, and mentioning it doesn't actually add significance to Penny's
plight. Repeating it over and over does not technically add some deep
meaning to the weather patterns over Atlas City.
It's just worth noting that the sun did slip in between the cracks in
the shuttered windows, and that was the first thing she saw on waking. A
nice, pleasant morning.
The second thing she saw was that someone had tied her wrists to a light
fixture over her head, and that wasn't very pleasant at all.
The third thing she saw was that someone had re-braided her hair into
adorable twin pigtails full of ribbons and bows, a laughable parody of the
braid she had worn since childhood...
But most importantly, the fourth thing she saw was that someone had
stuck her in an exceedingly pink dress with more frills and lace than an
entire old ladies' knitting circle, and in order to do that they must have
seen her naked at one point or another, and THAT was absolutely pissing her
off.
"HEY!" she shouted, trying to get some attention, as she had been tossed
in the back corner of some store room. She thumped her feet on the floor a
few times, raising noise a-plenty. "Whoever did this is gonna be... they'll
end up... well, I'm going to hurt them very much, I'll have you know!! HEY!
HEEEEY!!"
Mazoku teleport by blurring through shadow, elongating the eldritch
darkness which man's light has not reached. Ace Champion decided to appear
in a burst of adorable puffystuff and sparklies and whizzers instead.
He was all smiles, hands in the pockets of his jacket as he surveyed
Penny's costume. "It looks great, doesn't it? I just knew you'd be perfect
for my next project the moment I saw you."
"I swear, when I get my hands on..." Penny started. And stopped.
While she did have a bit of the naive girl left in her from childhood,
and tended not to be as observant as she should be, and was fairly clumsy...
she was still an Inverse. Some Drama Gene was waving its little chromosomes
at her, shouting, 'Hey, the bad guy wants to tell you all about his evil
plan! If you listen to it, you'll definitely escape when he's not looking!'.
"What project?" she asked, starting again.
"My Idol Project, of course," Ace replied. "Mooki-Pokko is fading. But
this, this can stay for years and years. I'm going to turn you into a
beloved singer, world renown, adored by millions. The costume is just step
one... a symbol of purity and childish innocence. Although you're not
exactly pure as the driven snow, are you, Penny Gabriev?"
Penny turned red. "How do you--?!"
Ace laughed. "I can just tell. Don't worry, I can probably fix that
once we get the ball rolling. I wish I could tell you more, but I've got a
tournament to win, and have to keep my sales pitch short."
"It's obviously not going to work," Penny scowled, channeling her anger.
"I can't sing, I don't want to be a pawn in your fads and I'm not going to go
back to being... a child. So you can take that little project of yours,
shine it up real good, turn it sideways and stick it up your--"
"Naughty words!" Ace gasped. "We can't have that out of our idol. But
Penny, doesn't a small part of you want this? To be useful? You're a
terrible, terrible adventuress. You know it. You can't fight, you can't
cast magic, you can't do anything."
Penny resisted looking surprised. Somehow, this kid had gotten into her
head... drudging up her weaknesses...
"Oh, I know what you're thinking," Ace spoke, a little music in his
tone. "I'm an ancient and powerful god, Penny, even if I look like a child.
I know you. I know you want to go home, I know you feel weak and useless,
and that you have to find your direction in life. That's what I'm offering
you!"
"You've got a funny way of offering it," Penny goaded.
"Granted, maybe the introduction had to be a bit harsh... since clearly
your possessive little adoptive mother would never let you go, she's really
unhealthy for your development, you know... but now we can carry on. Join
me, Penny. I can make you loved. I can make you useful. EVERYBODY will
want you. Everything you do will be magic, everything you touch will turn to
gold."
Penny weakened. He was right, in some respects. How she felt, what she
wanted... but was this the way? Did she even know what the way was, wasn't
that why she was so confused and despairing last night?
"You don't have to despair, Penny. I can help you. All I ask is that
you believe in yourself, and in me, and let me guide you, shape you and
remake you. Become mine. You and I can RULE this world. Sairaag itself may
think it will take over, that it has me in under watchful eye, but I have the
upper hand. We can topple Sairaag, lead the people against it with the power
of your song. You want that too, don't you? To stop the evil? Be a
heroine? A heroine idol?"
Penny looked down. "I don't, I just... I want to be a heroine. Like my
mother was, like Lina is, but.. I'm no good at doing it like they did..."
"Of course you aren't. You're not like them, and you don't need them.
You don't need your mother," Ace soothed, stepping closer. "You don't need
Lina. You don't need your father. You don't need Zoamel. You just need
ME..."
Zoamel.
Penny's eyes flashed, her anger rising again. And she kicked a god
squarely in the nuts, using the bindings to the light for leverage to make it
a really nasty zen master martial arts ballshot.
Ace flew back into a wall, his physical form propelled by the blow. He
bounced off the stone, and came up... frowning.
"I should have expected a dirty trick from a dirty girl," he poured on
her like venom. "Make no mistake, Penny Gabriev. I'll scrub you clean and
start with an empty mind if I have to! I WILL get what I want. I was hoping
you'd cooperate, but maybe it's better this way. Once I finish with Lina,
Idol Project begins."
Before she could tell the little bastard off and swear violence against
his person, the young Gabriev's drama gene perked up again.
Assuming her best impersonation of the Helpless Maiden, Penny twisted
her hands a bit, to show Ace how she was effectively restrained. "Just you
wait!" she declared. "Lina Inverse will rescue me!"
"I'm not sure about that, since she didn't feel like rescuing you last
night," Ace responded, marching to the door. "Shame, I had my Mooki-Pokko
Kabuki Ninja ready to jump them on arrival. Honestly, nobody EVER lets me
have any fun with my games... now you wait here like a good little girl and
I'll be back!"
Ace slammed the door so hard that the contents of a nearby storage shelf
spilled onto the ground.
Which is exactly what Penny wanted. A box filled with scissors, knives,
and other sharp objects spilled to the ground.
Unfortunately, it was several feet away, and she was actually quite
effectively restrained. But it was a start.
No true to the blood heroine would take something like this lying down,
after all. Or standing up, as the case may be.
[*]
The arena ROCKED with the cheers of thousands upon thousands of
children.
Fireworks and balloons signalled the start of the tournament, as a stage
show of various Mooki-Pokko doing a dance routine entertained the crowd.
Music flooded the air, and tasty childhood delights of all kinds were being
sold by vendors moving swiftly through the stands. If the situation were any
different, Lina would almost feel happy here, like a kid again.
As is, she remained as focused as an arrow on a target. Vigilant, and
ready to do battle, to lock horns and prove her mettle. Ready to cut a swift
path to victory.
After enjoying a hot meat pie, some cotton candy, popcorn and a box of
chocolate covered macadamia nuts.
"Would you relax? We're not up until the second fight," Lina said,
trying to calm her companion down (in between stuffing her face a fistful of
snacks at a time). "Jeez, Zoamel, you take everything so seriously. Even
your FUN is serious!"
"I see no reason to make light of this situation," Zoamel replied, cold
as ice.
"This is how I deal with stress," Lina philosophized. "You give me a
good meal and a refreshing beverage and I can topple the world with ease.
Now sit down and wait for the fight. Who's up first, anyway?"
"*THE OPENING MATCH NOW WILL BEGIN!*" the announcer blared through a
magical amplification system, loud enough to make Lina drop one of her boxes
of popcorn. (She had to resist the temptation to pump a Flare Arrow into the
broadcast booth to avenge her food.) "*The rules are as follows! Each
Mooki-Pokko trainer may use ONE Mooki-Pokko! The first Mooki-Pokko knocked
unconscious or out the ring is the loser!*"
"Perfect!" Lina cheered, waving a V for victory. "This is gonna be a
snap!"
"*ROUND ONE... RYO vs. XELLOSS!*"
The other popcorn box joined its brother on the grass. "What?!!" Lina
gaped. "Xelloss entered the tournament!?"
Sure enough, climbing into the ring was everybody's favorite secretive
little bastard, smiling and waving to the kiddies. His opponent, a young boy
dressed similarly to Ace (his hero!), seemed a little confused.
"Wow, you're old!" Ryo declared.
"More than you can imagine," Xelloss teased. He pointed dramatically.
"Now! Zelas-Metallum! I choose you!"
...and a small black bird reluctantly took off from its perch on his
staff, to land in the center of the ring. It looked back at him, as if to
ask 'MUST I do this?' but a stern look from Xelloss set the avian straight.
Ryo flipped a Mooki-Pokko card out from his sleeve, holding it up for
all to see. He twirled it once, before striking out. "Lionation! I choose
you!"
Black lightning sparked from the card momentarily, depositing a... six
foot tall snarling teeth like daggers hungry as hell cat with blood red
stripes in the ring.
"I almost feel sorry for that Mazoku," Zoamel mused, allowing himself a
smile despite his fierce concern for the day's events. "Lina, do you suppose
Xelloss is deliberately abusing his former master..? Lina?"
"Huh?" Lina asked, snapping out of her distraction. "Oh, right. Heh.
I can see it. Wage slave finally getting it out on his old boss... sorry, I
was just looking at that kid's card. It's pretty funny, I hadn't really paid
much attention to the Mucky-Socky cards before..."
Zelas cawed madly, hopping back and forth as Lionation swiped at her
with razor claws. It was almost comedic, the way the bird frantically tried
to avoid becoming several smaller subdivided birds.
Lina dug through her pack, searching. "I bought a pack of the cards off
some kid, so we'd have a dummy card to make it look like you were a real
Mippy-Mappy..." She took the pack, and ripped it open, to study a card in
greater detail. "Something about the light show these things use reminded me
of... of... uh. Zoamel?"
"That is one plucky little raven, I must say... yes, what?"
He turned, to look at the card Lina was tapping... or rather, the
faintly embossed purple cross in the center of it. A faded purple on a pure
white surface.
"Where have we seen this design before?" Lina asked.
"...the Eradicator disks?" Zoamel wondered. "But how could they be
related? This is a child's toy--"
In visually illustrated children's stories, loud background noises are
usually depicted by huge letters (mostly vowels) in big red letters behind
the characters. In this case, Lina practically was tossed head over heels by
a long string of 'O's and 'A's.
When she snapped to attention and turned her eyes to the fighting
ring... Lionation was soaring through the air at incredible speed, towards
the stands. The kids scrambled to get out of the way as the huge Mooki-Pokko
crashed into a row of bleachers, shattering wood and kicking up splinters
into the air.
On the whole, the tiny, unassuming black bird who was still standing in
the ring looked rather pleased with itself. With the crowd in stunned
silence, Zelas-Metallum flapped back over to her 'master', perching on
Xelloss's staff. He fed her a cracker in reward.
"*THE WINNER... XELLOSS!*" the announcer announced, and the crowd busted
out into applause, because everybody enjoys a good, clean afternoon involving
the gratuitous abuse of imaginary animals.
Xelloss strolled away from the ring, towards Lina. He blew her a little
kiss. "I'll see you at the semi-finals, Lina!" he greeted, before
disappearing into the shadows of the backstage tunnel. The red eyes of the
raven tracked Lina before they too vanished.
"..." was Lina's carefully worded response. Feeling that didn't sum up
her thoughts precisely enough, she added to it. "...call me crazy, Zoamel,
but.. I get this feeling that Birdie there wasn't hopping around and dodging
because she was outmatched, but... so she could toy with that kitty a little
longer before ripping it a new one."
"I have never believed in the existence of tame Mazoku," Zoamel spoke,
unsurprised.
Lina rubbed her forehead, feeling those waves of a headache coming on.
"I think this tournament just got a little more risky. If we're going to get
to Penny and the Tooth Fairy, we're gonna have to find some way to beat that
Mazoku, tame or not..."
[*]
Penny had cramps, and it wasn't that time of the month.
At first, she figured she could stretch a leg over to reach one of the
many sharp metal objects that held the key to her freedom. After all, she
was in pretty good shape for a girl her age, and it was just a matter of
strength and flexibility! For a trained fighter such as herself, capable of
dealing punishing blows to bandit after bandit, all she had to do was...
Be in the worst agony she'd ever experienced. The scissors and knives
and whatnot were JUST out of reach of her feet, no matter how hard the pulled
on her wrists or tried to bend. Kicking her adorable little pink Idol
costume shoes off didn't help -- a few times she managed to nudge them with
her toe, only the nudging put them FARTHER away.
Maybe she WOULD have to wait for Lina to rescue her... a lot like the
typical damsel in distress. At least she was dressed for the part...
No way.
If she folded now and just waited, she'd forever be someone's lackey,
Lina's or Ace's. It was a philosophical challenge! A massive ideological
obstacle to overcome! It was.... not going to work if she kept trying to
reach the scissors this way. By herself, like this, there was no way to get
free. So she'd just have to think of another way.
Her Inventory Bag had been knocked down from the shelf as well, but was
clearly too far away. She'd dismissed it from her escape plan because of
that, but something was nagging at her. Some way to use it to get help...
"Of course!" Penny shouted. Then toned her voice down, in case any
guards heard that. "...Table? Table-chan, are you hiding in there?"
The bag didn't stir.
"It's okay, it's okay," Penny soothed, trying to sound reassuring, using
tones she knew calmed the table down. "The bad man went away. You don't
have to hide anymore. It's okay, come on out. ...please? I need your help."
A little ruffle in her bag smoothed out... an object inside it moving
around. Table-chan was in there! But he was having some trouble with the
drawstrings on her bag. Penny might not have been able to move, but she
could talk, and lead the table to its own freedom.
"No, no... Table-chan? It's okay, calm down. I'll help you out of
there. First, you see the tiny opening in the bag? Work one of your legs
into the opening, and wiggle it around... yes, yes, like that! Good! Now
another leg, and try to shake the bag open... it's okay, you can do it! Push
harder! Great! Great!"
The table toppled out of Penny's bag, and did a little victory dance,
happy to be out of that dark, confined space.
Penny smiled to it. "Okay! Now get that knife, and bring it over
here!"
The table scuttled around the pile of objects, nudging the knife along
with the edge of its... table. Penny internally cheered, having found the
solution she needed, and having done it only with her mind, not her weapons!
Success! It was perfect!
Then the table stopped nudging, putting the knife at Penny's feet.
Because it didn't have prehensile limbs and couldn't actually pick it up,
much less climb up and cut her free.
Okay, maybe a little less than perfect. But it was a start. Carefully,
VERY carefully, she tried to pick it up with her toes.
[*]
Zoamel arched his demonic back, rippling with horns, spines and
unnecessary clawed limbs, emitting a low growl that shook his opponent to the
very core of fear itself and back to the limits of psychological tolerance.
Inset eyes the color of brimstone flared and smoked, tendrils of the infernal
soot dripping from his eye sockets...
And the sixth Mooki-Pokko of the day ran away in fear, leaving the ring
and giving Lina the win.
"*THE WINNER... MINA REVERSE!*" the announcer announced. (An assumed
name. Never put your real name on something you'd be embarrassed by later,
and Lina Inverse damn well didn't want to be worshipped as a Mooki-Pokko
Grand Dragon.)
Lina looked up from her fresh box of popcorn, holding up the empty
Mooki-Pokko dummy card. "Oh, over already? Good work, Zoamel! Return."
Zoamel warped an illusion around himself, pretending to get sucked back
into the card, and reappeared back on the bench in human form to join the
returning Lina, while stagehands tried to coax the Mooki-Pokko he'd just
scared off out of the rafters.
"I hope we're not scaring the children as well," Zoamel spoke,
concerned. "This plan is allowing us to win without having to harm anyone,
but--"
"Relax, Zoamel! The kids love you!" Lina said. "You're a bit out of
touch with humanity, you know. Kids love huge gross scary nasty things. I
did. And little boys do, too. Not that I'm a little boy, so no cracks about
that, got it?!"
"Of course, of course," Zoamel said, quickly begging off. He glanced at
the tournament standings. "We are undefeated, it seems, but so is Xelloss
and so is Ace Champion. In a few minutes, we'll be facing the Mazoku to see
who takes on Ace, won't we? Have you devices a strategy yet?"
"What answer would make you happier?"
"That you have a strategy."
"I've got a strategy, then," Lina said, grinning. "Don't worry. I'll
play it by ear and we'll win. If I know Xelloss, he'd see through any
intricate plan, anyway. I bet he's only in this tournament to discourage my
quest and get me to go attack Sairaag for him early. Pfeh. What a jerk."
"I hope your thinking on your feet pans out, Lina Inverse. ...I will
admit, now that we are here and committed, I find myself wanting to face Ace
Champion again," Zoamel admitted, quietly. "Perhaps I can exact a small
measure of revenge from him, a token to prove he is not the winner in all
games. That would please me greatly."
"Zoamel! I'm surprised!" Lina laughed, teasing the god. "I thought you
were all 'Oh, I have no wants save to support my believers' and so on! You
keep this up we'll have you eating huge dinners and mugging bandits in no
time!"
Zoamel coughed, uncomfortable. "Of course, you could say it's simply in
the wishes of the believers I lost to him, after all, ah, that's still a debt
long withstanding and so forth--"
"You think too much, Zoey. Just be cool with this whole god thing, like
me. It's not a bad thing to enjoy your life, even if you don't think you
ever had one in the first place. Come on, we're up against Xel now. Time to
flip the bird!"
[*]
A complex set of mirrors and refraction devices piped a live picture of
the tournament to the backstage area. Three figures stood, watching as Lina
and Xelloss took their places in the Mooki-Pokko ring. One smiled, one
didn't, one was too fuzzy in the head to comment.
"I'm glad the demon entered," Ace Champion said, sipping a fresh
lemonade, while fingering the card he intended to use. "Old friends and
enemies against each other! It's perfect drama. It's a shame the audience
doesn't know the history these two have--"
"We are in position, and ready," the stony figure in shadow spoke.
"Although it would be easier to take action now, when all four are in the
same area."
"You're not going back on your word, are you?" Ace asked. "I thought we
had today's fun mapped out. I want to look into that weak so-called god
Zoamel's eyes one last time and compete with him. It'll be fun, an encore
presentation of the last time I proved my superiority. Don't you agree,
Mint?"
Mint Endo blinked through the fog in his mind. "Yes, boss," he replied
automatically.
"We have a deal," Ace continued. "And if you want to stay on good
relations with your savior, mortal, you'll stick to the terms. Understood?"
"Yes," the Mystery Man said. Although the tone suggested he was just
speaking a syllable, putting letters together, rather than accepting the
meaning behind his word.
[*]
Lina and Xelloss stood on opposite sides of the garishly painted ring of
combat. They both knew what was at stake, and were quite serious, although
Xelloss held the same smile he'd keep even if he was describing war
atrocities. (Actually, it would be a little wider, in that situation.)
"Xelloss, you're not gonna dissuade me from this quest," Lina warned.
"I don't care if your boss does beat Zoamel, I'm carrying on."
"Oh, I know, I know," Xelloss explained, waving a finger. "But what fun
would it be if I didn't make life a little more exciting for you? Remember
the time I switched your racket with a fake one the last time you took part
in a tournament? Oh, what a grand day that was!"
Lina curled her hand into a fist. "Yes, in fact, I remember beating the
tar out of you after I found out. So don't think I'll mind if, say, Zoamel
chews a bit on your head after he finishes plucking your bird's feathers.
Nothing personal."
"I wouldn't have it any other way," Xelloss chuckled, raising his staff.
"Zelas-Metallum! I choose you!"
Lina flipped her empty card, tugging it with both hands to 'release' her
'Mooki-Pokko'. "Zoamel Gustav, I choose you!!"
Neither bothered with pre-match taunting, and engaged in one of the
nastiest, high powered knock down drag out good old fashioned barn burning
slobberknockers the Mooki-Pokko world had ever seen.
Whirling black shapes snarled and tore around the ring, keeping it
nicely contained so as not to disqualify themselves, but it was enough of a
maelstrom of energy that Lina felt the need to dive for cover. Zelas never
changed from being a tiny black bird, but the aura of evil and power from her
was strong enough for a minor Mazoku -- and Zoamel, not wanting to
accidentally hurt any of the kids in the stands, had to hold back. The two
were evenly matched.
And 'evenly matched' meant 'possibility of losing' which meant 'no
freaking way' in Lina's 'dictionary'. Now that she was against the wall,
though, she could actually think a bit more clearly about how to win one for
the good guys.
Crawling around the edge of the ring, she crept up behind Xelloss. The
Mazoku was, of course, enjoying soaking up the fear and adrenaline of the
crowd, and even some of the anger in Zoamel's controlled outburst... while
Lina kept her mind clear, nice and empty, only thinking about what she
planned to do at the last second...
She gripped the elastic bottom rope of the ring, and HAULED it down, to
snap herself into the air like a slingshot. Xelloss would be expecting
magic.
"XELLOSS, RETURN!" she shouted.. and slapped the card on his back.
"Wh--" Xelloss managed, before the black lightning enveloped him. He
tried to break away, quickly, even turning into the black cone of power that
was his true Mazoku form for a split second, but the card behaived as
intended... and Xelloss was sealed into the Mooki-Pokko card, the purple
cross glowing brightly.
"Wow," Lina said, waggling the card around, as it fought to bust itself
apart. "I honestly didn't know if that would work. Go figure! I--"
"CAAAAWWW!!!!"
Lina quickly hit the dirt, expecting retalliation... the Mazoku
blackbird of death swooped over her head, just barely missing getting a
clawful of her skull... and thus, out of the ring.
"*THE WINNER BY RING OUT... MINA REVERSE!!!!*" the announcer shouted,
and the crowd went wild, yaaay.
The paper card in Lina's hands burst apart, fibers scattering as Xelloss
was flung from it, tumbling end over end until he crashed in a hot dog
vendor's cart. His head came up with a little mustard and relish, which his
bird started to peck at, having a few birdlike instincts remaining.
"Mouuu, that was dirty, Lina!" Xelloss whined, rubbing his sore back.
"Hey, you'd have done the same thing if you'd thought of it first," Lina
pointed out, with a little smile.
Xelloss tapped a finger on his knee, in thought. "It's true," he
admitted, and got up, dusting himself up. "Well fought! Looks like you're
on to the final round."
Walking over in human form, Zoamel seemed quite concerned. "Lina, what
did you do?" he asked. "I wasn't paying attention, but... it seemed like you
managed to trap Xelloss in one of those cards?"
"They're like the Eradicators," Lina said. "But it stores AND ejects
the Morris-Phillips, which are just extensions of Ace's Demiurge self,
right?"
"But the Eradicators kill Demiurges," Zoamel said, in slight confusion.
"How can these cards be similar? The discs pull your self from you and wipe
you out utterly..."
A cheer went up from the crowd, as the tournament board updated itself,
steam powered wooden slats showing the final round matchup. "*FINAL ROUND!
MINA REVERSE VERSUS.... ACE! CHAMPION!! MOOKI-POKKO GRAND DRAGON ULTIMATE
CHAMPION AND HERO TO ALL CHILDREN!"
"Hold that thought," Lina suggested. "It's game time. Remember, this
is for Penny. Don't hold back this time."
Xelloss waved a huge foam We're Number #1 hand. "Good luck! Break a
neck! Don't do anything I wouldn't do!"
"What WOULDN'T you do?" Lina asked, curiously.
The hand waving stopped. "Oh. Well. Not much, I suppose. So just
break a neck and have good luck and skip the doing part."
[*]
Sweat stood out on her brow. This... took.. very.. careful balance...
The plan, as she had laid out, was to make a Table-chan friendly ladder.
Get him and the knife up high enough that she could grab it and cut herself
free. The mechanics of it were a little more daunting than the concept.
Progress had been slow, but sure. Table-chan lent a han.. a table,
nudging over a chair to step up on, and a tall table next to it. She'd
picked up Table-chan with her foot, setting him on the larger table (which
probably resembled its mother). Almost everything was ready, with one or two
more details...
She perched on one foot, the knife CAREFULLY held with the other foot.
Step up onto the chair, not too hard. Get her leg up to drop the knife on
the table, that was easy, but then she had to... carefully... tilt the table,
without knocking it over... so the knife would slowly slide down, towards
Table-chan, who was lying on his side and ready... stopping when it hit him.
Thunk. Perfect.
"Okay, we're almost there," Penny said. "Table-chan, nudge it up and
onto you, then stand up... so it's resting on top of you. Got it?"
The table chirped in response, and slowly waggled its legs... uprighting
itself, with the knife lying just as Penny was hoping. She eased the taller
table back to be parallel with the floor again.
"Now, here's the hard part," she admitted. "You couldn't jump up there
from the floor, but from here... you can jump up to that empty shelf, with
the knife, and then pass it to my hand. Okay? I know you can do it!"
The table trembled a bit, afraid it'd hurt her in the process, but she
gave it her best reassuring smile... and in a quick leap, before it could
worry anymore, the table SPRANG into the air, land--
The knife skittered off and onto the shelf, but only three of the
table's legs made it up. It wobbled and rattled madly, trying not to slip
off... and was nudged up when Penny strained to reach over, and prod it with
her fingertips. A close call.
Penny breathed a sigh of relief. She held her hand out, and caught the
knife perfectly by the handle when Table-chan nudged it over, and started
cutting at the ropes. The hard part was over; it wouldn't be long now.
Not too bad for a girl Ace thought was essentially helpless.
[*]
Ace Champion sized up Zoamel Gustav, just smiling away at all the
tentacles, snarling teeth and slimy eyeballs presented to him. It was fun to
see his old rival trying so hard, even if Ace personally didn't feel the
slightest bit of fear. If it made Zoamel happy, and was essentially useless,
what was the harm?
"You know the deal, Ace," Lina reminded. "We defeat your Mooki-Pokko,
you hand over Penny and the location of the Fairy. We lose to your Mooki-
Pokko... we'll walk out of here without a second glance."
"You're lying," Ace decided. "Lina Inverse wouldn't do that. But
that's okay. Because if I beat you once, it shows to all my followers that
you're less than me. You'd be hard pressed to defeat me once I've buried
your image in this town..."
The boy held up a single card. The crowd cheered -- they knew something
Lina didn't.
"Behold, the most powerful Mooki-Pokko in all existence!" Ace declared.
"The legendary psychic cat... NI-KO! I CHOOSE YOU!!"
The card flared, ejecting... a bright white ball, a sphere of energy
that contained a white and purple catlike figure. (Catlike, with a bit of
mouse and dog and sewing machine and rhino and street sign built in, but hey,
Mooki-Pokko ARE funny looking.) The ball hovered towards Zoamel, utterly
unafraid, smooth as silk.
"He won't be scared off like the others, because he's blind," Ace
announced. "But even without sight, he hasn't lost a single Mooki-Pokko
match since I started this trend. I've poured a lot of my essence into his
form, and transfer the rest in when he's in combat. You're against me now,
Zoamel, me in the shell of the children's hero embodied, me in my shrine.
How can you possibly hope to defeat that, so far from your temples?"
The monstrous Zoamel Gustav growled/slathered/chittered something that
probably meant 'Shut up and fight'.
The battle made the previous one seem like a cheap stage play with
halfhearted smoke bombs and flat, unbelievable sets. A PILLAR of raw
lightning sprouted from the ring, encased in the ropes and extending a
hundred feet in the air, as the two tangled and twisted, trying to knock each
other out of the boundaries. Both got in good licks, evenly paced...
Lina hopped out of the ring quickly, as did Ace, to let her competitor
go ballistic without worrying about hurting her. "C'mon, Zoamel!!" she
cheered on, waving her hands. "Beat that Demiurge! Spank that kitty! Fight
fight fight!"
"It won't work," Ace said, a voice right to Lina's mind. "He has no
true believers here. He has no leverage. He never fully used the power of
his flock, never milked them for every drop of what they had. Can't you feel
the children, giving everything to see Ni-ko triumph?"
"Shaddup," Lina barked... but she could feel it. Just like she had the
other day, the lines, the wind from the children into the tiny sphere
surrounding Ni-ko was there. What did Zoamel have? Her own belief that
Zoamel could kick ass and take names didn't count; she wasn't human, she
wasn't one of his faithful. And Zoamel was failing.
But it wasn't because Zoamel was weaker. Ace was so small compared to
the great Zoamel, a tiny pinpoint of incredible power, with Zoamel's more
dispersed and subtle power. But Zoamel wasn't getting any leverage, he
didn't have any break out moments, while Ace could goad his followers on.
Lina fingered through her pack, hoping she had more empty cards, but came
up... well, empty.
It would take a miracle.
It would take ONE person with enough faith to tip the scales, even if
just for a second. Someone who believed in Zoamel with utter devotion...
THERE. A stream, small but with incredible force, from somewhere
backstage, getting closer...
And Zoamel gripped Ni-ko through the ball of energy, and SLAMMED the
catthingy into the surface of the ring, embedding the Mooki-Pokko halfway
through the canvas. It was only one attack out of the many failed attacks,
but the impact on the pace of the fight was immediate.
A collective gasp went up from the kids. Their hero had been struck!
The whirlwind of power faded, as Zoamel stood perched in the ring before his
enemy, howling in rage. The cat's legs flailed around uselessly, as the
humiliation of the WAY he had been attacked worked its way into the minds of
the faithful... while Zoamel moved for the kill.
The human-shaped extension of Ace Champion balled his fists, sweating.
"No," he whispered. "No. I can't lose, I never lose my games. I'm ACE
CHAMPION! I will not LOSE!!" He twirled, facing the broadcast booth high
above and the figures within... then whistled, sharply. A signal.
A tiny object glinted off the sun, whirling down from the booth, and
impacted in the ring -- right underneath Zoamel Gustav. A tiny white disc
with a purple cross.
Ni-ko pried itself up from the ring and BOLTED for the far corner, to
avoid the effects of the Eradicator, but the black lightning reached up from
the disk, trying to snare around Zoamel. Zoamel pulled and tugged, but the
device was made to render resistance futile...
"How do you like it, Zoamel?!" Ace taunted, laughing at the god's
plight. "How fitting that your existence should end, drained away into an
invention of MY DESIGN! Say hello to Sairaag when you arrive!!"
Lina moved quickly, climbing into the ring -- but froze. If SHE touched
that thing, she'd suffer the same fate.
It was a no win situation. No win for anybody except Ace, who was in
the corner with Ni-ko, laughing away. He NEVER lost...
Like a javelin from the heavens (or more specifically, the backstage
entrance) a poorly made custom naginata arced through the air, and SPEARED
directly through the center of the Eradicator. The blade was blunt and
cheap, but that served all the better to shatter the disc into several
pieces, breaking its hold on Zoamel in an instant.
All eyes in the arena turned to the figure at the entrance, who stood
with fury in her eyes, and an adorably fluffy pink dress that didn't quite go
with her anger.
"How DARE you hurt my dear Zoamel!" Penny shouted, pointing at the
unbelieving Ace Champion. "You wanted a Mooki-Pokko fight? I'll give you a
Mooki-Pokko fight! And when I win, you're going to tell Lina what she wants
to know, and we're ALL going to leave your crazy city! You're going DOWN,
Ace!"
Lina clapped and hooted and whistled. "That's my girl!! Kick his
scrawny little ass, Penny!" Then she QUICKLY dragged Zoamel's drained,
unconscious human form out of the ring and got to maximum safe distance, just
in case.
Ace didn't stop looking shocked. His world had been rocked, and it
showed; the children now weren't watching to see their savior win, they were
watching to see what would happen next, who would come on top. "You
challenge ME?! The failed heroine, the broken girl? Fine! I'll show you
what it means to pick a fight with one who has been around since man first
had desires! Bring it on! NI-KO, I CHOOSE YOU! AGAIN!"
Penny vaulted into the ring, over the top rope and landing on her bare
feet. She reached into her knapscak, and hurled out...
"TABLE-CHAN, I CHOOSE YOU!"
The table did its best to pose dramatically and heroically.
Ni-Ko fell on its face in surprise.
"Oh, no, geez, PENNY!" Lina shouted, clawing at her hair. "It's just a
freaking TABLE! I know you're fond of the stupid little thing, but how the
hell do you expect it to beat that guy?!"
A mad glint of delight flashed in Penny's eye, as she issued the
command.
"Table-chan, Dirty Little Secret Attack NOW!"
The table SPRANG into the air, running on whatever rocklike equivalent
it had for adrenaline (magma?), arcing towards Ni-ko. Ash and Ni-ko looked
at it fly, not quite sure what it was trying to do, since the worst it could
manage was to give Ni-ko a little bump on the noggin...
Table-chan landed squarely on Ni-ko's head, all four legs locked into
position. It glowed briefly, filling up on data, stocking its internal
information...
"Ni-ko!" the table chanted. "Demiurge extension, fragment of Ace
Champion! Psychic Cat-type Mooki-Pokko! Allergic to mice! Wets its card
whenever scared!"
The mighty Ni-ko trembled.. and started to turn red. Ace tried to order
it to relax, to obey him, but he HAD breathed Mooki-Pokko nature into this
extension of himself, and Mooki-Pokko were, by definition, silly and wacky
creatures...
"Secretly believes itself superior to all children due to phenominal
psychic attack power!" the Table continued... as the children started to BOO
the Mooki-Pokko, and throw empty popcorn boxes at it. "Related to owner, Ace
Champion! Ace Champion hates all children as well and only wants their money
and devotion! Ace Champion, Demiurge, cheats to win because he feels
justified in the outcome! Ni-ko, Mooki-Pokko, secretly likes to wear women's
clothing and cries during sad stories!"
Task complete, Table-chan jumped off Ni-Ko's head, and scrabbled back to
hide behind Penny.
"Stop that!!" Ace shouted to the crowd, dodging thrown garbage. "I love
you guys! I'm your hero! STOP that! Ni-Ko, no, wait, don't leave the--"
The embarrassed Mooki-Pokko fled the ring, crying its blind little eyes
out, until it hit a wall of the arena and was knocked unconscious.
The shock of the loss delayed the announcement, but it was inevitable.
"*THE WINNER, BY RING OUT.. AND KNOCKOUT.. THE GIRL IN THE PRETTY DRESS
AND HER TABLE TYPE MOOKI-POKKO! WINNER OF THE TOURNAMENT AND GRAND DRAGON
ULTIMATE MOOKI-POKKO CHAMPION!!!*"
The god of fads knew for the first time what losing truly felt like.
And he hated it. The sooner this was over, the better. Ace sank to his
knees in disbelief, as Penny towered over him, flashing a V sign.
"Victory! Okay, Ace, fess up. Where's the Tooth Fairy?" she asked,
hands on hips.
".... Bimini Island," he spoke, quietly. "He's at Bimini Island. Now
go. Go away. Leave me alone."
Triumphant, Penny waved to the crowd, blew kisses, then marched out of
the ring with the table on her head. Her friends joined her, and off they
went, the cheers and adoration of the children ringing in their ears on
departure. The tournament was over.
(Penny Gabriev left her naginata stuck in the canvas of the mat. She
didn't need it anymore.)
[*]
But when they got back to the inn, they set a new world record for speed
of bag-packing, and sprinted for the gates of Atlas City at a flat dash.
"We just crushed their hero, that's why!!" Lina shouted, in response.
"Take it from someone used to dealing with angry crowds! Once the rush wears
off, they'll be after us with pitchforks and torches. I intend to get at
least twenty miles between us and this place before sundown!"
"Couldn't I even have taken this stupid dress off?" Penny complained,
jogging along with the table on her head and her frilly skirt bouncing along.
"It's humiliating!"
"Oh, I don't know, I think it shows off your cute little butt well!"
Xelloss musically chimed in with, earning a Roaring Elbow to the face from
Penny.
"I doubt Ace will come after us," Zoamel said, not bothering to run,
simply to float along with them. "For the first time in history, he has been
utterly broken by a simple mortal. I believe you have achieved the vengeance
I sought over him better than I could have, Penny. Very good work. ...and I
think it's a rather attractive dress, myself. If you don't mind me saying
so."
"..." Penny replied, turning red.
"So where the heck is Bimini Island?" Lina asked, yanking a map out of
her pack without losing any steam in her brisk jog.
"It's off the coast of Sailoon," Zoamel stated. "This road runs right
through the capital city, and to the docks, where we can catch a boat."
"Just what I needed, another boat," Lina grumbled. "Well, whatever!
I'm just glad to be gone from there. But... who threw that disk down there?
One of Ace's guys? I thought I heard him say something about him the disk,
but it was too loud for me to hear clearly..."
"He said he invented it," Zoamel spoke, voice going cold compared to the
previous praise he as issuing. "The cards and the disks must be related.
Ace has backstabbed his entire race in making a weapon that traps us. They
are not 'eradicators' at all, but prisons."
Lina ran in silence... turning that over and over in her mind. The
million gold piece question burned through the haze.
"Why on earth would THEY want to trap a Demiurge?" she asked.
[*]
Ace Champion punched a locker hard enough to dent it.
"I HAD him!!" he snarled. "I had that bastard, and ONE believer gave
him the advantage. One believer! It's impossible that a single sheep could
empower the shepherd so much. No human believes that strongly in their god!"
"It seems you were mistaken about a great deal of things," the man said,
leaning on the locker bank, ignoring Ace's rage. "You have failed, Ace. We
wanted them in the open, and easily taken. We could have had Lina and Zoamel
before they became a larger problem for us."
"I can get them again!" Ace declared. "Chase them! Hunt them! I can
make hunting a fad. I can turn this entire CITY into my army, devoted to me,
to crush--"
"No," the man said, stepping closer. "Sairaag isn't interested in
failures. We've allowed you to continue to operate in exchange for your work
on our primary goal, but your usefulness is at an end. You can do nothing
further for us, and your desire to conquer the world with your gimmicks and
tricks is contrary to our designs for civilization. It's time to join your
kin in the core, Champion."
Ace's eyes widened.. and he stepped back, human instincts in his human
shell to get away. "No, wait! How can you say that? We've been working
together for years now, and I'm still useful! I DESIGNED those things, I can
make more wonders for your technocracy! Put it down! Zelgadis, please,
DON'T--"
Seconds later, a white disk fell to the floor, glowing with stored
power. Zelgadis picked it up, pocketed it without a second thought, and
walked out of the room.
[*]
Mint Endo oversaw the deconstruction of the stage the next morning with
a massive headache rocking his brain. Partially it was a hangover from
having a good round of stiff drinks the previous night, but mostly it was
from his confusion over recent events.
It didn't make any sense. The tournament had a SPECTACULAR turnout and
an amazing finish. The kids should be buying more Mooki-Pokko merchandise...
But they weren't. All the cards had stopped working. Atlas City was
waking up from its fascination with Mooki-Pokko, and moving on with other
things. Enthusiasm for the fad had died almost overnight.
Win some, lose some, Mint thought. He'd gone through this before with
the blasted mood rocks. Mooki-Pokko's era was gone, and he'd just move on to
something else. Maybe something with a bit more staying power, not designed
to appeal to the masses, burn hard, and die out in a year.
There was that long standing idea he'd had for a sort of game about
adventuring, but the elements never came together. But ever since the
tournament, he'd been thinking of new things... about a good heroine
character with a nice dress and a naginata who could be the title character,
and a new rule about rolling dice on a table of numbers to see what wandering
monsters you bumped into...
The rest didn't feel as hard to think up, now. Tonight he'd start on
the first edition of the rulebook, and maybe slowly leak it to folks hoping
for a bit more of a mental challenge than Mooki-Pokko offered. They could be
heroes and heroines using only the power of their minds... and a few random
numbers, of course.
Maybe he'd call it Demons and Dungeons, or something. But first things
first.
Mint took the last pile of wooden stage props, lit a match, and let it
burn. It was easier than hauling it out to the town dump. He marched off,
visions of adventures and glory in his head as the legacy of Ace Champion
boiled away into the sky. The sun was a bit murky that day, but things were
certainly looking up now.
[To Be Continued]