EVE
@---{-----
Notes for the series....
~xxx~ = sound effects.
*xxx* = the memory spell voice and also for telepathic thoughts
((Disclaimer: Ranma 1/2 created by the great and extremely funny Rumiko
Takahashi and owned by her, Viz., Kitty, Fuji TV and Shogakukan Inc. and
maybe other assorted companies. I hold absolutely no claim on any of the
Ranma 1/2 characters...))
Confused? Think characters are OOC? Read previous parts before making snap
judgements. http://www.users.globalnet.co.uk/~stroma/eve.html
If you still feel there's something wrong, contact me. I'd love to hear any
opinions, good or bad. ^_^
CHAPTER 7: SHADES OF DEATH, COLOURS OF LIFE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Without warning, Ryoga found himself standing in a small room. So
empty and quiet and yet so full. He was past being surprised by anything
anymore, past caring about wherever he really was. Shadows sifted though the
windowless room and these shadows seemed to reflect aspects of his life.
Passively watching with his face betraying no emotion, he saw the dark
shapes dancing on the wall with katas and martial arts moves long ago
ingrained into him. These were moves he had learned alone, trying to pass
away the hours of silence.
Over and over, the same moves.
Over and over, the same thoughts.
Over and over, the same detachment.
He had always felt like an extra jigsaw piece, trying to fit into a
world where there was no room and no need for him. He�d studied martial arts
so hard, focused completely on them while trying not to think about the
bullying, the distant look in people�s eyes as he tried his best to fit in.
That look had changed little throughout his life, only distancing further as
his strength and skill grew. They would respect him physically and only
physically. As far as the world was concerned, Happosai�s moxibustion
technique had stamped his soul from birth. To them and to himself, he had
the strongest body but the weakest mind, so all he could do was practice in
silence until all there was of him was physical, instinctual. For those few
moments, motion took over emotion and gave him release.
But recently, whenever he had tried to slip into the depths of his
katas, all he would think of was how they hadn�t saved Akane and how useless
they really were. Ranma, the least introspective person he knew, the one who
probably had never needed to sink into the moment and escape from his
emotions, Ranma had saved Akane. Not him but Ranma. The katas didn�t help
get rid of that arrogant smirk on Saotome�s face. Once, Ryoga thought that
Ranma had considered him a decent rival but now....
Why would he even consider Ryoga a challenge after defeating a god? He
was nothing but an amusement now to the pigtailed martial artist. Even Akari
wouldn�t face him, anymore. If she saw him like this, then she would burst
out laughing at his sorry state. And Akane wouldn�t even notice that because
she never noticed him. He could lift boulders, jump over buildings, destroy
buildings with a blast of energy but no-one would be there to show these
feats to.
�Oh, gods,� he whimpered to the quiet. �Even I don�t want to know me!�
A bitter, sharp gasp followed this last statement. Despite frantic efforts
at pride, a short sob soon slipped out of his mouth too and he bit his lip
to prevent any more. After all, there was no-one here to see him crying so
what was the point of letting painful tears fall?
*Well, live or die?* the flat Voice cut through his mind and his head
jerked to the side as if to shake it out.
�I... I don�t know!� he cried in frustration, desperately needing
something to hold onto life with. A memory, a hope, anything. But all he
could remember were the dark recollections of a wasted life.
*Die.*
�Why?� He hoped that he�d find something to counter, to find a little
light of redemption in.
*Die!*
�Why?!�
*You have nothing to live for,* the Voice answered with a metallic,
stinging edge to its tone.
�I--�
*Akari doesn�t care.*
�Well, I never loved her!� Ryoga screamed back, despite a tightening
in his chest. He didn�t need Akari, he didn�t need her to survive, he could
life without her, he could, he could, because....
*Because you love Akane.*
�She--�
*She could never love someone like you.*
�Why?� he snapped back, hissing as the words branded him like cattle.
�What�s _that_ wrong with me?�
*What�s right with you?* the Voice deadpanned, a relief of humour
dimming its monotonous drone.
�.....I can�t think of anything,� Ryoga mumbled, his eyes falling to
the floor as his heart dragged him there, weighing his chest down with the
heaviness of truth and realisation. The room seemed to get smaller, though
there was no sign that it was. But even as his body leant over the slightest
amount, still he stayed standing.
*That�s right, you can�t.*
�Because I�m a lonely--�
*Yes,* the Voice interrupted with a strong, dominating tone that
lightened only with utter agreement.
He recalled the chase after Ranma for so many years all because of the
need to focus. �Desperate, obsessive, sick--�
*Yes.*
Thoughts of being P-chan, the only way he could get close to the girl
who never even cared about him. �Sick, perverted, cowardly....� He paused.
*Yes...?*
It was so hard to say the words he was going to because they destroyed
the illusion of that which he hoped were his strengths. He knew know that
he never possessed the pure and just righteousness that could counter them.
�Hypocritical, dishonourable, weak--�
*Yes.*
�Foolish, pathetic--� he mumbled on, barely aware of the words
anymore.
*Pig?*
�Yes. Yes, I am. Who could love me?� he sighed without much emotion
either way, just a growing emptiness that gnawed at his stomach.
*Does anyone?*
�No, and you know that. Why ask?� he growled with the little anger he
still held.
*Do your parents care?*
�If I died, they wouldn�t even know,� he stated numbly, as if reciting
off a well-learned script.
*Do you want to die?*
�I don�t know.�
*You don�t know anything,* the Voice said, reverting to its normal,
icy tone.
�Yes.�
*You don�t have anyone.*
�True.�
*You can never live a normal life.*
�Never.�
*You can never raise a family.*
�Right.�
*Never get married.*
�Obviously.�
*Will never be accepted for all that you are.*
�......I�ve never known anything else.� Protests for living started to
fade as Ryoga listened on, his face gaining an unmoving, ungestured quality
of resignation. His downcast eyes lacked any spark of innocence or naivet�.
*With nothing to live for, why bother?*
He said nothing, falling to the floor with one last sob.
* * * * * *
Ukyo gazed down at the prone form of Ryoga�s, so still and pale. And
there wasn�t anything she could to help. Or so Eve claimed. But there had to
be something she could do! Checking to see that no-one else was outside the
doorway, ready to surprise her, she stepped back to the futon where he lay,
leaned down and....
Suddenly, a scream erupted from his mouth and slammed a now deaf Ukyo
to the ground. As her ears rang with his non-stop scream, other people
tumbled into the room. Steeling herself from the dizziness and the shock
with a shake of the head, she looked up to see Ranma and Akane staring at
her with concern.
�Ukyo?!� Akane shout, or at least that�s what Ukyo thought she
heard, the ringing still banging right into her ears. �Are you alright?!�
�Ry-Ryoga.... He just suddenly screamed an' screamed,� the young chef
stuttered, the ringing fading but still disrupting her hearing. She hoped
that her words were half-intelligible.
Ranma and Akane averted their gaze to see a silently still
martial artist with his lips pressed firmly shut.
�He did?� they answered in unison, giving Ukyo something else to be
irked with.
�Yeah, Ran-chan,� Ukyo said before quickly adding, �Akane, he was. It
wasn�t me. I�m fine; I was just taken by surprise, that�s all. Really.�
�The poor guy,� Ranma muttered, �hasn�t had much luck recently.� His
eyebrows curved in sadness and his lips sighed in regret, changing into a
thin, sad smile.
�You�re right, Ranma,� a new voice replied, their flute-like voice
adding a breathiness to its song. �And one would almost think you cared.�
�Hey, I never sa--� Ranma cut himself off when he spun round to see
Eve and Akari at the doorway to this boxed-up back room. �What happened to
you guys?! You been in a fire or something?� Eve and Akari�s clothes were
ripped and partially blackened. Ashes falling off their clothes showed the
evidence of something fiery, especially Eve�s red dress, which was now so
much shorter that--
�Akari?� Akane breathed in shock as she helped the weary girl flop to
the floor. Kneeling down to face the farm girl, Akane stared at all the cuts
and scraped lining the once flawless face. �How did you get mixed up in
this?! Who did this?!�
�You know who did.� Eve kneeled beside Ryoga and stroked strands of
sticky dark hair back from his face. She didn�t even spare Akane a glance.
�Jaden,� her voice replied like a deadening thud, �Now, we don�t have much
time to talk. Ryoga could already be dead inside there. That scream was
warning that the process is about to begin.�
�Process?� Akari piped up before anyone else could, the anxiety in her
voice hitting a chord in everyone else, though no-one would admit it.
�Suicide.� Eve continued to look down at Ryoga, her face even more
entrenched with regret than Ranma�s, guilt setting the solid foundations of
her frown. �What else could the scream be except pain? Now, Akari-san,
please tell me, what your decision is.�
�I... I....� Akari stole a longing gaze at the pale wreck that was her
boyfriend, or so she had thought. His hair was greasy and matted, his face
unlined but still deeply sad and his eyes were so blank and almost hollow.
It just wasn�t fair on anyone, this. Especially on her Ryoga, no matter
whether he felt the same way about her or not. He was her darling Ryoga and
not even he could take that away. �I will. Whatever it is that you�re going
to do, Miss Eve, I�m going to help.�
Not even cracking a half-smile for politeness� sake, Eve gathered her
red hair up in a tight ball and strung it into a ponytail, shifting to side
of Ryoga. She clasped her soiled and black ashed hands in front of her face
and beckoned Akari forward with a cock of the head. �Come now, I�ll protect
you throughout this. You have no need to worry. And no matter what, don�t
doubt my ability to save Ryoga or the idea of saving him or he will sense
it. Only you love him almost unconditionally.� As Akari tentatively sat
down, cross-legged, opposite Eve, the red-head took the teenager�s hands and
wrapped her own around them. �Lose those conditions.�
�And what�re we to do?� Ranma interrupted, accidentally posing with
his now healed leg after having the cast taken off it this morning.
"First of all, Ranma, take good care of yourself. Also, if either of
us scream, get Akari-san as far away and wake her up any way you can. Don't
come back to this room for a few days. Got it? Good." Without waiting to
answer the sputtering reactions of those around her, Eve shut her eyes and
suddenly all her and Akari saw was blinding darkness......
.......The darkness gave way to light, shape and definition. Akari opened
her eyes, unaware of when she had closed them, and saw what looked like a
narrow suburban street with trees peeking over the walls of back gardens.
She blinked and looked down, seeing her clothes were clean and free of any
rips.
�What?�
�I think that about sums it up,� Eve replied, her lips quirking into a
small smile. Her torn red dress had now been returned to its original state
as well. Long and flowing, it glided against the immortal�s skin in response
to the breeze and she felt so... overdressed and restricted. Hopefully,
there would be no fighting in this place.
�So, where are we?� Akari asked, having expecting something slightly
more surreal and abstract. Did the sun in the sky and the quiet street mean
that everything was all right in Ryoga�s mind? Is that where they were?
�We�re in a representation of Ryoga�s last memory.� A frown pushed
down Eve�s smile. �The one where he read the invitation for Ranma and Akane�
s wedding and decided to go on a journey.� Looking up towards the bright
blue sky where Ryoga had over a month ago, she grimaced again as she
remembered the emotions that he had went through as he read and re-read the
invitation. Refusing to meet with Akari�s eyes, she murmured to her, �The
invitation was the reason Ryoga never made it to your planned date or any
others you�d made.�
�Oh, right,� Akari mumbled back, still getting used to this new,
darker view of her love. She looked up at Eve, waiting for her to say
something comforting about Ryoga to ease her young mind. Eve held out her
hand and Akari grasped it, not sure what to make of this serene area that
was really only a memory.
�I was right, Ryoga is very near the end and, so far, he hasn�t chosen
to live,� Eve thought out loud as she started to walk down the street with
Akari, increasing her pace with every step.
�How do you know?� Akari started to jog to keep up with Eve�s speed,
not liking the words spoken out of the young woman�s mouth as they left a
bitter aftertaste on her own.
�Otherwise, he�d be awake and we wouldn�t need to come here, of
course.� Eve�s eyes darted from side to side, examining every corner of the
street for life of any kind. �Where could he be...? Is he even here?�
�You don�t know?�
�No, Akari-san. For once, I don�t.� Eve seemed to be staring straight
ahead, narrowing her eyes and concentrating on something with determination.
Suddenly, a familiar bandanna appeared in the air above her outstretched
hand. It fluttered down to her fingers and she rubbed the smooth material.
�Yes, it�s definitely his.� She turned her head to face Akari and smiled.
�If you can, picture your boyfriend�s face for me? Every detail you can
recall about it.�
�Alright then, Miss Eve.� Not sure what was going on but sure that it
was for Ryoga�s good, Akari shut her eyes as she concentrated hard on
remembering his face. She tried hard not to sigh as her imagination drew
around his jaw, his kind smiling lips and the black locks of wild hair that
set of his deep, dark eyes perfectly. She failed.
A flapping noise caught her attention and Akari opened her eyes to see
a piece of... paper, was it? fluttering in the non-existent breeze. Eve
stole it from the air and grimaced as she looked at, her red hair dancing
around her shoulders as she shook her head.
�What�s the matter?� Akari asked, taking a peek at the photograph in
Eve�s hands and gasping. �That�s Ryoga! What are you doing with a picture of
him?�
�Not much, it seems,� Eve grumbled, clenching the photo tight in her
hand. She unfolded it and took a long, hard stare at it before grumbling
again. �Nothing! It�s not fair!�
�What isn�t fair?�
�Life.� Eve glanced at Akari with a strained smile, barely hanging on
to her face. Regret. But why? Was it something to do with the photo? The
teenager could only guess at what the older woman was thinking. If it was
about Ryoga, then she wanted to know.
�If I find a way to get to him, I promise I�ll let you know.�
Akari stared at Eve. Were her emotions so easy to read that Eve seemed
to know just what she was thinking?
A tug on her hand jerked Akari from that worry and she followed Eve as
she practically sprinted down the street. A soft glow of hope of hope grew
in Akari as she noticed the set, determined expression that added years to
Eve�s face. With a small smile, she asked, �Do you know w--�
�No.� Akari�s smile disappeared with that word. �But while I think
some more, we can have a look around. You never know what you might find,�
Eve said with a grim, stony grin desperately trying to appear much lighter
than it was......
......After what seemed to be forever to Akari, Eve stopped and sat on a
nearby bench, but the teenage girl didn�t sit down and instead watched the
summer sun rise in the sky. She wasn�t used to not feeling tired after so
much walking or not feeling cold in the middle of winter. Since none of this
was real, apparently, she guessed that it made weird sense.
They had walked from one place in Ryoga�s memories to another with no
luck. Among these surreal surroundings were the cursed springs of Jusenkyo,
the Tendo Dojo, several nameless streets in different seasons of the year,
Ryoga�s house and his old school. Nothing. Several schemes of Eve�s were
tried out over and over. No success. Nothing. It... it wasn�t fair! It wasn�
t fair! Not on her Ryoga!
The salty taste of her bitter tears touched her tongue as she bit her
lip to stop the sobs. She didn�t want Eve to hear her, to tell her to be
strong for her boyfriend. But he wasn�t her boyfriend, not truly. She loved
him, yes, but he didn�t love her! He never loved her and she didn�t know!
How could she not know? How could she not see it? See the way he blushed and
stammered whenever the three of them happened to meet? Was she so blind not
to see his hurt look when he told her that Akane had said what a nice
girlfriend he had and how happy she was for him? Akari had thought Ryoga was
happy that Akane had said that but the truth was... he was trying to
convince himself that he felt the same way.
Akari choked on the sobs as she forced them back down. If she�d only
known, she�d have helped Ryoga before this, tried to assure him in some way
that everything was going to be all right. A gasp escaped her trembling lips
as she recalled a poem that she�d once caught Ryoga writing. And she�d been
foolish enough to believe that the poem was about her. One part had confused
her but she�d overlooked that, overlooked it as she concentrated on the good
parts, memorising them word for word as she reinterpreted it to her
advantage. But that didn�t matter to her anymore. It didn�t matter that he
only loved Akane because all she wanted was to see him alive and well. And
now, she was so sure that it was too late.
�I know you love Akane,� Akari whispered to the air, hoping he could
hear her, somehow. �And I know you would want to remember that as y-your
last thought so pl-please listen to me. Please.� Closing her glistening,
wet eyes, her heart fell as she retrieved the words of the poem from her
memory. Oh, it hurt just to think of the state he must have written in! No
wonder he had tried to hide it from her.
To keep the words fresh in her mind, she imagined that she had written
the poem. Her thoughts filled with all the time she had spent with Ryoga,
that precious time when he had seemed to enjoy her company, smiled and
laughed as she once thought he�d normally done. But all that time, his heart
belonged to... to....
Taking a deep breath, Akari recited the poem to the sky, word for
word, trying hard not to think how much she loved and needed him:
�One look was all it took
For my soul to be lost to you.
I'm caught on your hook,
Line and sinker, I will fall.
Mere words can never convey
How I feel about you.
In the darkness you strike a ray
Of light that will never leave me.
A dagger falls into my unwilling heart,
Even though I know you're happy,
When you're with him, I fall apart.
For your joy, every night, I pray.
Every time I see your eyes
And your heart-breaking smile,
I have to throw away my guise
That my heart is still mine.... Oh, Ryoga, I d-don't want to l-lose
you!�
As the last words stammered out of her mouth, Akari cried out loud and
fell to her knees, only to be caught by a strong pair of arms and pulled
into a gentle hug.
�It�s all right, Akari-san,� Eve murmured soothingly. �It�s all right.�
�But it�s not!� she cried, turning around and leaning her weary head
against Eve�s chest. �I need him! I�d do anything to see him!
...ANYTHING!!!�
Eve�s bright eyes suddenly widened as Akari screamed and she hugged
the girl closer, whispering in her ear: �Don�t worry, Akari-san.�
�J-just Akari, you can just cuh-call me Akari,� the sobbing girl
stammered, her tears slowly dying away.
�Akari,� Eve said, her voice so soft and warm that Akari felt like it
was a large blanket being wrapped around her senses, calming her nerves.
�You�ll be waking up soon. Ukyo and the others will help you recover. I�m
sure Kasumi will make you something lovely to eat and then you�ll get some
sleep in and--�
�B-but... what about you? What about Ryoga?�
�I�ll keep trying and trying but you get some rest, okay? You need it.
Tell Akane to keep an eye on Ranma, will you?�
Akari looked up at Eve and studied her, seeing nothing but sincerity
in her warm, wide smile and expressive face. Eve wasn�t any good at hiding
her emotions, either. A tiny grin sprung up on the Akari�s face as she
thought about this.
�Yes and thank y--� Akari said, even as the surroundings faded and she
returned to the �real world.�
After Akari totally disappeared, Eve relaxed her arms, trying not to
remember how long it was since she�d last had a hug. Kneeling down on the
ground a few feet in front of her, she sighed sadly as she examined Ryoga�s
still face shining as the sun rays highlighted him from between the white
clouds. Lying flat on the ground, pale faced and cold to the touch, he
didn�t move even as Eve searched for any wounds or marks on his body. Only
his shallow breathing and open but unresponsive eyes indicated anything
odd about him.
She was glad that she�d let Akari read out the poem, even thought it
had broken the poor girl�s heart to do so, along with her own. It had
worked, turned an innocent girl into an emotional wreck, but it had worked.
�Believe me, Akari,� Eve muttered with an acidic tone, �you have
nothing to thank me for.�
Now all she had to do was bring Ryoga back from near-death and drag
the utterly depressed boy back to reality, whether he wanted to or not. Oh,
yes, how easy! She knew what he had gone through and how close she�d come to
the decision herself. She told the others it was a memory spell but the
truth was it was nearer to mind rape, where one was stripped of any dignity,
pride or happiness and left to deal with a shattered soul. At least Ryoga
would have help, unlike her. At least he would have help. She�d make sure of
that.
* * * * * *
�Yes and thank youahhh!� Akari shrieked, stopped by the shocking cold
drenching her body as if she�d just been plunged into the Arctic sea.
Shivering and shuddering against the inflicted sensations, she opened her
eyes, wiping away the moisture blinding them. The cold crawled all around
her body and she shuddered again, sneezing suddenly. �What?� Shock numbed
any words more complicated. As abrupt as the cold, something warm was thrown
onto her shoulder and one on her dripping hair, flicks of which were
annoying her face. Focusing her eyes and her mind, Akari saw Akane and an
effeminate boy kneeling down beside her. �Where?�
�Hello, Akari!� Akane greeted, as she fingered an empty pail near her
very suspiciously while smiling with relief. She wore a short skirt and
vest-style top but still seemed to be sweating. Akari knew that the weather
had been very hot recently but, right now, she definitely didn�t feel it.
�You�re back in my house, in my bathroom. You were hard to wake up so we--�
The boy flicked back his ponytail in slight anger as he turned to
face Akane. �--You, Akane, just you decided to soak the poor girl with a
bucket of water. Look at her, she�s totally freaked out.�
�Well,� Akane grumbled, deflated, �it worked, didn�t it, Ukyo?�
Akari, still recovering from the surprise, pulled the towel around
her shoulders closer and shivered. Taking in her surroundings, she sighed
wistfully at how alike this bathroom was to her own... not that she had one,
anymore. The sigh changed to one much lower and sadder as she thought
further about this. Homeless, she was homeless....
Noticing the girl�s distressed expression, Akane and Ukyo helped
Akari up and guided her out of the bathroom.
�You can borrow some of my clothes while yours dry,� Akane suggested
in a friendly tone, trying to hide her guilt. �C�mon, let�s go upstairs.�
She smiled again to emphasise the friendliness. Whatever Akari had gone
through while with Eve had affected the girl badly. Akari reminded her a lot
like Ryoga but without the temper. Her scream, that had instantly awoke
Akane from slumber, signified that something terrible had happened. With the
pain in that scream, what else could it be?
�That's nice of you,� Akari mumbled, unable to look Akane in the
eye without a strange, irrational feeling jarring the peacefulness of the
Tendo household. Jealousy. �Thank you.� The jealousy invaded and mocked
the genuine gratefulness she felt because of Akane being so kind to her. It
was horrible, the bitterness and envy that infested her heart like weeds
when she saw Akane�s smile.
...Every time I see your eyes
And your heart-breaking smile...
No, no, not those words, not that poem! How could Akane be so happy
and oblivious to Ryoga�s love for her? Did she know and just pretend,
secretly enjoying his heartbre-- No, no more anger at Akane! She can�t be
angry at one of her few friends! No! She�d lost too much already to lose a
friend. And this boy, Ukyo, seemed quite nice too, although Akari felt that
she was missing something about him....
�So, what do you think? The pink top or the blue one?� a voice
intruded on her thoughts and Akari blinked to see that she was sitting on
someone�s bed in an airy, bright room. They were in Akane�s bedroom,
already? Akari didn�t even realise that they�d gone up the stairs.
�S-say that again?� she stammered, adjusting to the loss of time.
Akane stood up in front of her, holding a pink top in one hand and a striped
blue T-shirt in the other, looking rather bemused at Akari�s words. Both
tops looked shorter than what Akari considered ladylike. Is that why Ryoga
preferred Akane over her? Was it because Aka-no! She had to stop thinking
like this!
Straining a smile, she pointed to the longer blue top but didn�t say
anything, not trusting herself to speak kindly. Akane didn�t seem to notice
and handed the blue top to Akari, before putting the other back unaware of
Akari�s eyes on her back, who couldn�t help studying the martial artist�s
nicely shaped body. Toned and with a healthy glow, Akane�s skin was much
nicer than her own. She felt so much paler and fatter compared with Akane.
No wonder Ryoga loved Akane and not her....
�You change into this and dry your hair,� Akane said cheerfully,
apparently unaware of Akari�s barely hidden jealous expression. �I�ll go
wake Ranma for lunch. The baka is still not up.�
�Lunch?� Akari asked but Akane had already left the room.
�You�ve been out for nearly a day, hon,� answered another voice. �It�s
lunchtime, the next day.� Flicking her head around, she saw Ukyo standing
near the window and blushed in embarrassment.
�S-sorry, I forget you were there, I--�
�Hey, don�t worry about,� Ukyo replied with a wry grin. Akari
instantly felt so grateful and yet so small. Everyone was being so lovely
and all she could do was gripe about Akane....
Ukyo noticed her silence and moved towards her, sitting beside her on
the bed. �So, Akari, you know, don�t you? About Ryoga?�
�Huh?� The blush on Akari�s face deepened. �What are you talking
about?�
�I�m not blind, sugar.� Ukyo�s grin stiffened into a more serious
smirk. �I saw how you stared daggers at Akane like she was your worst
enemy.�
�No, I don�t hate her!� Akari protested, ashamed that her emotions
were so easy to read. �I like her. She�s very nice, she�s very helpful--�
�And Ryoga loves her,� Ukyo added, stopping Akari�s stutterings. Her
expression softened as she watched the Akari�s face pale and her eyes
furiously blink back tears. No wonder. Poor girl. Before all this had
started, Ukyo hadn�t even known that Ryoga had a girlfriend, not with the
way he mooned over Akane.
�You knew?� Akari breathed, wide-eyed. �Does Ak--�
�Everyone seems to know but her, hon. It was pretty obvious.�
�Obvious to....� Akari�s voice was getting hoarse as her suppressed
turmoil and regret hit her chest hard. She could barely breathe. �Obvious to
everyone but her and me! How could I not know? How could I--�
Ukyo shushed her, still smiling softly but sadly. �Hey, don�t blame
yourself for not knowing. It�s not like you hang out in Nerima much. You
weren�t to know.� For a minute or two, Ukyo said no more to Akari, letting
the girl compose herself. After all, the last thing Akari needed was Akane
asking her why she was upset.
Suddenly, Akane burst back into the room, her face creased and drawn
with slashes of worry. �It�s Ranma!� she cried. �He won�t wake up! I keep
trying and trying but he won�t wake up!!�
* * * * * *
He watched from the entrance in silence as she continued to smash the
bricks in two, unaware of his presence. Each strike quick and deadly,
shattering the brick more than breaking it into two. After the destruction
of each brick, she took another one and balanced it on wooden blocks before
slashing it with a swipe of her slim wrists and small hands. Hands that held
incredible power. Her face, he noticed, was screwed up in anger and fiery
hatred, crushing the beauty it held with snarls.
As he entered the training hall, she turned to face him and that
fierce expression deepened with disgust at his presence. This only punched
away any warm feelings he once had for her. How could he have ever cared
about someone so angry, so dark, so unforgiving that hated him so much? His
hurt over her betrayal had hardened into a concrete mix of anger and
bitterness. After all he had said and done for her, after all the times he
had saved her, and she couldn�t even be the least bit grateful?
�What do _you_ want?� she snapped, her fists clenched together. The
last spark of hope for reconciliation burned away as the acidity in her
voice ate at his soul.
�Obviously not you,� he retorted, hiding passion of both kinds under
an icy glare. Slowly but swiftly, he walked towards her and she backed away
to the wall.
�Leave me alone,� she growled faintly, fear evident in her tense
movements and jerky speech. He stared into her deep, beautiful eyes and
tried to find any trace of love or warmth but fire greeted his eyes instead.
�G-get away from me!�
�You don�t trust me,� he breathed. For a moment, an iciness stabbed at
his heart, killing the innocent passion with an untamed fury. It left him
feeling... so empty... so cold. How could she make him trust her, make him
believe in her, make him fall in love with her so deeply, fall for that
smile he never saw and then... shatter it all just like that?! Shatter him!
Damn her, damn her stupid family, damn everyone who�d never believed
in him, never cared for him despite all his efforts to prove his worth! All
they had ever done as ignore it and use him, they�d all used him, used his
sincerity for their own gain and never given anything back but hatred and
distrust! Twisted, sour betrayal carved into the emptiness left by his soul.
Well, he was fed up of feeling like scum. With his strength and speed,
he didn�t need to bow to anyone�s wishes ever again, especially hers. She
represented all the hate everyone felt for her, all the times he�d made
sacrifices to save someone and all the pain it had caused him. Pain. That�s
all she�d given him.
�Please go, please d-don�t hurt me,� she whimpered as he moved closer
to her. She backed up right against the wall, gently edging along the wall
away from him. Her whole body trembled and sweat intermingled with tears on
her face. Heh. Payback.
�All you had to do was smile.� He grinned with a sadistic sharpness,
pulling a gasp from her mouth. �All you had to do was say you trusted me and
were grateful for all I had done for you. And smile. That�s all. But, nooo.�
He shook his head, barely a metre away from her. �You couldn�t even give me
_that_!!�
He shot across the remaining space. She ran off but he grabbed her
throat and slammed her back against the wall. Her eyes went wide and she
stammered nonsense words, obviously unable to think clearly. Pure fear
shimmered in her eyes and he could feel the heavy thumping of her heart and
the cold sweat dripping down her face and throat. His grip tightened and her
hands shook, unable to even reach up to loosen his grip.
�Don�t worry, I don�t like seeing you in pain,� he remarked coldly,
warmth now an alien emotion to him. �I�ll make sure you�re never hurt
again.� With this, he jerked his gripping hand to the side, a snapping
sound whipping through the hall. Laughing as her head slumped forward,
bereft of any spark, he let her drop to the floor in a heap. As his head
snapped back in unstoppable laughing, his pigtail flicked--
Pigtail?
Oh my god! He did it! NO! Akane! Akaanneee!!!
�Akaaaaannneeeeee!!� Ranma screamed, jolting upright, his unfocused
eyes wide open. Light intruded on his unnerved senses, reeling from shock
and maddening horror. Oh, shit, he killed Akane! Why the hell did he do
that?! WHY?! �Get up, Akane! Get up!!�
�I am up,� a familiar voice sliced through his shock and he focused
his eyes to see Akane sitting beside him, smiling with a slight bemusement.
Her deep eyes smiled at him as well, worry slightly marring the beauty.
�Akane?� Ranma gasped. �You�re alive!! Is that really you?! Are you
really here??!!�
�I, uh, think so,� she murmured, blushing at the happiness in his
voice and the big grin on his face. �What�s wrong? Did you have a
nightmare?� Did you have a nightmare about me, she wondered to herself.
Barely able to stop himself from wrapping her in an embrace, confusion
stopped him short. �What, what are you talking about?� His heart was
currently dancing around in his chest as his head went off and had a big
party as she smiled warmly again. �I... what?�
�We�ve been trying to wake you for ages, Ran-chan,� another voice
added. He glanced another way and saw Ukyo kneeling very close to him.
�Wake? I was... asleep?� he mumbled, the party dying down in his
head as reality crashed it. He looked around and realised he was still in
his futon in his room. Akane and Ukyo sat on either side of him with Akari
and his dad standing over him. Dampness seeped through his senses and he
looked down to see that he was soaking wet. Lifting a hand to touch his
head, he felt his wet, dripping hair and moist face. But why did he feel
warm?
Noticing his confusion, Akane announced: �It was getting near
afternoon and you hadn�t woken up, yet. We, uh, I tried to wake you up with
a bucket of cold water but that didn�t work, so....�
�I then emptied a kettle of hot water over ya, honey,� Ukyo added,
�but that didn't work.�
�What-what were you dreaming about?� Akane hesitantly asked, locking
her gaze with his.
Hesitating in his reply, Ranma didn�t want to tell Akane that he
dreamt he killed her and that this wasn�t the first time. A cold shudder
trickled down his spine and he broke the eye contact, unwilling to confess
about all those nightmares at the hospital where she ended up dead by his
hands. In the end, he had just stopped trying to go to sleep, staying awake
all night so that he didn�t have to... didn�t want to see her like that....
But he must�ve slipped and fell asleep. It had been a long time since he�d
last had one. Now, they had come back and he had no choice but to forsake
sleep, again. Dammit! If lack of sleep hadn't already worn his nerves down
to breaking point by lack of sleep, the nightmares had to keep scraping away
at his sanity.
�Ranma?� Akane questioned softly. He faced her again and opened his
mouth to speak but nothing came out. What was he supposed to say... oh, I
just killed you and enjoyed it, happy now? But he couldn�t do that, he
didn�t want her to doubt that he would ever let anything happen to her.
�I can�t really remember,� he lied, wincing inwardly at how easy he
found it to deceive her. �It�s gone.� He shrugged his shoulders, smiling as
best he could as he patted his stomach. �So, what�s there to eat? I�m
starving.�
A collective groan emanated from the group surrounding him.
�That�s more like you, Son,� Genma said proudly. Ranma�s long lie-in
had delayed lunch long enough.
�Whatever.� Ranma grinned, standing up and preparing to leave the room
along with everyone else. One of the last to leave, he felt Akane�s
disbelieving eyes boring into his back like a drill into his conscience.
Yet, he didn�t say anything; he couldn't trust his own voice.
He needed her to believe that he�d die before seeing her hurt.
He needed her not to believe that she could die by his hands.
He needed her too much.
End of chapter 7...
I never thought I'd finish this and get over the writer's block. Since I
wrote most of this in a few days, checking it over only a couple of times
before sending, any mistakes of any kind you spot, I would be most happy to
know about. Also, let me know if anyone out there's still reading this, even
after all this time. C&C is always welcome. :)
~Kayu-chan.
~~~
"One good thing about being wrong is the joy it brings to others."