Subject: [FFML] [Repost][FF][SM] Waiting for Minako 7 - 11
From: Mark Page
Date: 1/21/1999, 12:39 AM
To: ffml@fanfic.com

Waiting for Minako
by DDFA (Mark A Page)

Part Seven - The Replacements

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Scene: Makoto and Ami, sitting on a brick wall in an empty park, 
somewhere in Tokyo.  In the background are the sounds of distant
explosions and various emergency vehicles.  There is smoke blowing
across the sky from somewhere in another part of town.  Makoto is
staring off into space whilst Ami is looking up at her, 
mischievously.


Makoto:	I wonder where she's gotten to.

Ami:	Probably sleeping with Artemis.

Makoto:	AMI-CHAN!

Ami:	Teehee....

Makoto:	You know, you've gotten real ecchi in your old age.

Ami:	I am NOT ecchi....  I just have my moments....

Makoto:	Yeah, where you are a sick, perverted little creep.

Ami:	That's not fair.  You're as much a sick, perverted 
	little creep as I am.

Makoto:	.....

Ami:	.....

Makoto:	Gee, you know, you're right.

Ami:	Nice to see you're admitting to your faults for once.

Makoto:	It doesn't change the fact that you go around dissing
	others in a perverted manner....  Minako sleep with 
	Artemis?  Oh puhleeeeeze....

Ami:	Well, I'm bored.

Makoto:	Well, so am I....  Minako is so damn late.

Ami:	I wanna do something else, rather than just sit around
	here and wait for the blond bubblehead to show up....

Makoto:	Ami....

Ami:	What?

Makoto:	You called Minako a blond bubblehead....

Ami:	So?

Makoto:	You NEVER call anyone a bubblehead.

Ami:	So?  What's so special about that?

Makoto:	It's SO out of character for you to do that.

Ami:	You're right....  It must be my old age.  How old are we
	all supposed to be, now?

Makoto:	Sixteen at last count.

Ami:	Sixteen my ass....  Twenty would be more realistic an 
	age.

Makoto:	Shhh....  Don't let anyone hear that....  You'll dispel
	a well-worn myth....

Ami:	.....

Makoto:	.....

Ami:	Argh!  I can't stand this....  I want to be somewhere 
	else.

Makoto:	Settle down.

Ami:	No!  I want a holiday from this, with all expenses paid!

Makoto:	Don't be silly.  We're supposed to be waiting for 
	Minako.

Ami:	I noticed.  I just have to mouth off my objections.

Makoto:	I mean, it's not as if anyone is going to come along and
	replace us for a while, or anything.

Michiru:	You were saying?

Makoto:	What the....  Where the hell did Ami go?

Michiru:	I replaced her, my dear.  She was exhibiting signs of 
	fanfic fatigue, and the writer decided it was time to 
	give her a holiday.

Makoto:	What the hell....  I didn't know this was in our 
	contract!

Michiru:	That's because you can't read, my dear.

Makoto:	Oh yes....  I keep forgetting.

Michiru:	Now then....  Where were we?

Makoto:	We were waiting for Minako.

Michiru:	Ah, now I remember.  It says so in the title.  Yes, very
	well....  We shall wait for Minako with much passion.

Makoto:	.....

Michiru:	.....

Makoto:	.....

Michiru:	.....

Makoto:	.....

Michiru:	.....

Makoto:	.....

Michiru:	.....

Makoto:	.....

Michiru:	.....

Makoto:	.....

Michiru:	.....

Makoto:	.....

Michiru:	.....

Makoto:	.....

Michiru:	.....

Makoto:	.....

Michiru:	Ack!  That's it!  I can't take this!

Makoto:	What's wrong with you?

Michiru:	How am I expected to wait for that blond-haired imbecile
	with someone like you?

Makoto:	What are you saying?

Michiru:	You're too stupid, my dear, to engender any witty 
	repartee'.  I'm afraid you're going to HAVE to be 
	replaced, too....

Makoto:	Is that an insult?

Michiru:	Yes.

Makoto:	Why you....

Haruka:	Ah, just in time, it seems.

Michiru:	Haruka, my love.

Haruka:	Michiru, my darling.

Michiru:	Come to my arms.

Insert sounds of much divine passion here.

Michiru:	This is, most certianly, a lot better.

Haruka:	I could see things were not going well between you and
	that lame-ass Jupiter.  I just HAD to intervene.

Michiru:	Yes, but now we face an even greater dilemma.

Haruka:	What is that, my love?

Michiru:	Why would a pair of suave and sophisticated 
	intelligentia, like ourselves, be waiting for an inbred
	imbecile the likes of Venus?

Haruka:	Why, you have a point there.

Michiru:	I do declare, that we replace this wait for Venus with a
	person of greater standing.

Haruka:	How about Setsuna....  She is much more worthy to wait 
	for.

Michiru:	Indeed.  We shall wait for Setsuna.

Haruka:	.....

Michiru:	.....

Haruka:	She's late.

Michiru:	Yes, she's late.

Haruka:	Very very late.

Michiru:	Yes, she's very very late.


END OF PART 7

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Will Setsuna ever arrive?  Have Haruka and Michiru really replaced 
Makoto and Ami, or is it all a figment of their imaginations?  Stay 
tuned for the next exciting installment of the enthralling wait by 
Haruka and Michiru, in "Waiting for Setsuna", brought to you by 
Deathbed Pharmeceuticals, where pain relief is just a morgue away.  
^_^




Waiting for Setsuna
by DDFA (Mark A Page)

Naoko Takeuchi owns these characters.  I sincerely doubt she'd want
to have anything to do with the way I persistently bastardise them.
^_^

Part Eight - The Intelligentia

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Scene: Haruka and Michiru, sitting on a brick wall in an empty park, 
somewhere in Tokyo.  In the background are the sounds of distant
explosions and various emergency vehicles.  There is smoke blowing
across the sky from somewhere in another part of town.  Haruka is
staring off into space whilst Michiru is looking up at her with an
air of suggestive mischievousness.


Haruka:     She's late.

Michiru:    Yes, she's late.

Haruka:     Very very late.

Michiru:    Yes, she's very very late.

Michiru looks away.

Haruka:     .....

Michiru:    .....

Haruka:     .....

Michiru:    .....

Haruka:     We're really not doing much better than that pair at 
            waiting, are we?

Michiru:    We do seem to have reached a form of impasse in our 
            conversational capacities.

Haruka:     One would have expected somewhat more from two stylish
            individuals, like ourselves.

Michiru:    Oh, most definitely....  We are FAR more interesting 
            than the pair of feeble-minded cretins we replaced.

Haruka:     I couldn't agree with you more.

Michiru:    So, what is stopping us from the usual form of witty
            repartee that we usually have?

Haruka:     Probably a case of afterglow....

Michiru:    .....

Haruka:     What are you looking at me like that, for?

Michiru:    Afterglow?

Haruka:     Eheh....  Sorry....  I can't help it with the suggestive
            comments, sometimes.

Michiru:    Mou....  Haruka....

Haruka:     Eheh.

Michiru:    Mind you, you could be right.

Haruka:     Hmm?

Michiru:    With that apparatus we used, I'm just aching all over.

Haruka:     Ge!

Michiru:    It took such a long time to put together, after it 
            arrived in the post.

Haruka:     Michiru....

Michiru:    What?

Haruka:     You don't have to go into specifics about what we get up
            to in public.

Michiru:    Why not?  It's public knowledge, anyway.

Haruka:     Because there might be some poor, misguided SOS newbie 
            reading this....  It'll damage them for life.

Michiru:    Hmph.  I care not for such individuals.  They lack
            class.  And they make up lots of stuff about us....

Haruka:     Hmm....

Michiru:    .....

Haruka:     .....

Michiru:    .....

Haruka:     .....

Michiru:    You know, she's probably been and gone.

Haruka:     Who?

Michiru:    You know.  Setsuna.

Haruka:     What do you mean?

Michiru:    She would have known, beforehand, that she had to be 
            here, now.

Haruka:     Of course she would have....  I told her.

Michiru:    No, I mean BEFORE you told her.

Haruka:     Oh, right.

Michiru:    Yes, she's probably been and gone....  Got sick of 
            waiting for us to get here.

Haruka:     Or she arranged this, behind our backs, all along, like 
            some devious, Machiavellian plan.

Michiru:    She's probably hiding around here, somewhere, having a 
            good laugh at our expense.

Both look at each other, then peer behind the wall for a moment.  
They shrug and turn away.

Haruka:     That would just be silly.

Michiru:    Yes.  Rather paranoid of us.

Haruka:     But with Setsuna, you never really know, do you?

Michiru:    She MIGHT just do it, to catch us off our guard.

Haruka:     She's a sneaky one, I tell you.

Michiru:    Setting us up, here, to wait in place of that other pair
            might have been her plan, all along.

Haruka:     Yes....  Something of vital importance might happen 
            here, something that will affect the future of Crystal 
            Tokyo.

Michiru:    We might be called upon to use our powers to defeat 
            another hideous enemy.

Haruka:     .....

Michiru:    .....

Haruka:     Do I see smoke over there?

Michiru:    Where?

Haruka:     Over there.

Michiru:    You mean where the plane came down?

Haruka:     Oh, that's what it was.  I was wondering.

Michiru:    Must have been hundreds on that plane.

Haruka:     Yeah, lots of bodies.

Michiru:    Those poor people.

Haruka:     Still, it's better than dropping a space colony on 
            someone.

Michiru:    Ouch....  There goes Sydney again.

Haruka:     Some people will consider anything to stop Australia
            winning medals in the Commonwealth Games....  Especially
            those Canadians.

Michiru:    Only if they're from Edmonton.

Haruka:     Where?

Michiru:    Edmonton.

Haruka:     Never heard of it.

Michiru:    Nobody's heard of Adelaide, either.

Haruka:     All the better, I say.

Michiru:    Hmm....  Whatever.

Haruka:     .....

Michiru:    .....

Haruka:     .....

Michiru:    .....

Haruka:     She's late.

Michiru:    Yes, she's late.

Haruka:     Very very late.

Michiru:    Yes, she's very very late.

Haruka:     .....

Michiru:    Probably off having an illicit affair with Mamoru-
            san....

Haruka:     MICHIRU!

Michiru:    Teehee.


END OF PART 8

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Will Setsuna ever arrive?  Is there really a place such as Edmonton, 
or is it all a figment of their imaginations?  Stay tuned for the 
next exciting installment of the enthralling wait by Haruka and 
Michiru, in "Waiting for Setsuna", brought to you by coffee.....  
The stimulant for a new generation of fanfic writers.  ^_^




Waiting for Setsuna
by DDFA (Mark A Page)

Part Nine - The Decay

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Scene: Haruka and Michiru, sitting on a brick wall in an empty park, 
somewhere in Tokyo.  In the background are the sounds of distant
explosions and various emergency vehicles.  There is smoke blowing
across the sky from somewhere in another part of town.  They are 
both staring off into space.


Haruka:     She's late.

Michiru:    Yes, she's late.

Haruka:     Very very late.

Michiru:    Yes, she's very very late.

Haruka:     .....

Michiru:    Probably off having an illicit affair with Mamoru-
            san....

Haruka:     MICHIRU!

Michiru:    Teehee.

Godot:      Excuse me.

Haruka jumps in surprise at the sudden appearance of an old man.

Haruka:     Erk!

Godot:      Oh, I'm so terribly sorry.

Haruka:     Who the hell are you?

Godot:      The name's Godot....  I heard you were waiting for 
            somebody, and thought I could give you a few pointers on 
            the art.

Haruka:     Eh?

Michiru:    On what?  The art of waiting?

Godot:      No no no....  The art of making people wait....  I often
            use it to get back at all those bastards who have held 
            me up in my life....  Lemme tell you.  There was this 
            pair....

Haruka:     Oh KAMI!

Michiru:    Somebody!  Stop him before he starts reciting an old 
            story....


Cut Scene: Ami and Makoto are lying on a beach in Hawaii, in the 
skimpiest of swimsuits, sunning themselves.


Makoto:     You're right, you know....  This is so much better than
            Tokyo in the mid winter.

Ami:        Told you so....  You should always take my advice when 
            it comes to holidays.  I ALWAYS know what I'm talking
            about.

Makoto:     Pity nobody else does.

Ami:        What was that?

Makoto:     Oh, nothing....  Nothing....  I was just contemplating 
            the sky.

Ami:        Yes, it's so blue.

Makoto:     Very blue, indeed.

Ami:        With the tiniest speckles of clouds.

Makoto:     Yes.  Yes, they are clouds, aren't they.

Ami:        Well, of course they are.  I ALWAYS know what I'm 
            talking about.

Makoto:     Yes, yes, yes....  You're the smartarse amongst us all.

Ami:        What was THAT?


Ami sits up, scowling at Makoto, who ignores her.


Makoto:     You know, I wonder how that pair of lame-ass Outers are
            going at waiting in our place?

Ami:        Who cares?  I'm having a good time.


Ami lies back down.


Ami:        Ah....  We should have done this a long time ago.

Makoto:     We couldn't....  Our paypacket only increased upon the 
            signing of our last contract.

Ami:        Yeah, you're right about that.

Makoto:     Best we could afford, when the show started, was a trip 
            to a hot springs in the mountains.

Ami:        How positively quaint.

Makoto:     Not to mention hokey....

Ami:        I bet the slavering hoardes of hentais out there would 
            have given an arm and a leg to see those moments....

Makoto:     Yeah, they would have.

Ami:        Amusing how I always seemed to come out on top in all 
            the character polls, too....

Makoto:     Stop bragging, you blue-haired bint.

Ami:        Number one on the Animage character poll, I was.

Makoto:     Gawd, here she goes again.

Ami:        I knocked that lame-ass Nausicaa flat!  Boring Miyazaki
            slag....  Gets a role in ONE movie, and everyone wants
            her as their daughter.  Well, I showed them.

Makoto:     And then you were booted from number one.  I hear the 
            fight is now between a firebrand sorceress and and blue-
            haired chick with a stock line.

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     "Baka", she says....  I really hate it when catchy 
            little quotes like that become the in thing.

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     What's wrong with you?  You've gone quiet.

Ami:        I've just realised....

Makoto:     What?

Ami:        It's....  It's all over.

Makoto:     What ARE you talking about?

Ami:        We....  We now only exist in the minds of the dedicated
            fans....  Our show is no more....

Makoto:     Oh, don't get all moody....  There'll be some great 
            revival, one day....  Bandai always milks its cash cows
            dry, you should know that.

Ami:        I.... suppose you're right.

Makoto:     Well, I ALWAYS know what I'm talking about.

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        Bitch.

Makoto:     Ah ah ah, no claws, thankyou.  We're on holiday.

Ami:        I'm not so sure this was a good idea, anymore.

Makoto:     What is it then?  Chopped liver?

Ami:        It's.... kinda strange, but I have a strange feeling 
            this really isn't happening....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        Like.... this is some kind of diversion....  That we're,
            in truth, still back in Tokyo, waiting for Minako-chan.

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     Now you've got me going....

Ami:        Eh?

Makoto:     I'm getting kinda freaked out, here.

Ami:        What?

Makoto:     I've got the same feeling as you.

Ami:        No!  Don't say that....  It might be TRUE.

Makoto:     But it isn't true, is it?  I mean, we're here, on a 
            beach in Hawaii, aren't we?

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     Well, we ARE, aren't we?

Ami:        The sky is so blue.

Makoto:     Don't change the subject.

Ami:        It looks to me just like the sky in Tokyo....

Makoto:     Stop that....  You're scaring me.

Ami:        Mako-chan....

Makoto:     What?


Ami turns and looks at Makoto.


Ami:        I've always wanted to know....

Makoto:     What?

Ami:        Ever since that episode with Haruka and all that....

Makoto:     What?  Come on, what?

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        Do you prefer margarine to butter?

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!


END OF PART 9

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Will Minako ever arrive?  Are Ami and Makoto on a beach in Hawaii, 
or is it all a figment of their imaginations?  Stay tuned for the 
next exciting installment of the enthralling wait by Ami and Makoto, 
in "Waiting for Minako", brought to you by Death.  If it's good 
enough for Kenny, it's good enough for YOU!  ^_^




Waiting for Minako
by DDFA (Mark A Page)

Part Ten - Existentialism, Surrealism, Post-Modernism, Dadaism, 
Cynicism, Neo-Classicism and a Partridge in a Pear Tree

(Thanks goes to Jon Carp for the title inspiration ^_^)

--------------------------------------------------------------------


Scene: A beach, supposedly somewhere in Hawaii (it has not been 
confirmed by our agents).  The beach is empty, save for the figures
of two young women, lying back on beach towels, dressed in the kind 
of extremely skimpy swimsuits that would normally classify this fic
as rampant fanservice.  But since most of what you're imagining Ami
and Makoto to look like is occurring in your mind, and not here, 
then I have only one thing to say to you....

Sukebe.

Both Ami and Makoto look extremely bored as they stare at the sky,
wondering, briefly, how Haruka and Michiru are doing, waiting in
Tokyo in their place.


Ami:        I've always wanted to know....

Makoto:     What?

Ami:        Ever since that episode with Haruka and all that....

Makoto:     What?  Come on, what?

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        Do you prefer margarine to butter?

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!


Makoto gets up from her towel and starts running around the beach, 
freaking out.  Ami watches her, passively.


Ami:        Do you really have to make so much noise?

Makoto:     Oh, fer chrissakes!  What did you have to ask me THAT
            for?

Ami:        Well, every fanboy I know wants to know the answer....
            Incipient homosexual tendencies.  Lack of boyfriend.  
            Constant harping about previous relationships and all.  
            I mean, I've been wanting to know for years.


Makoto falls flat on her back, on the sand, sweatdropping.  Ami 
turns away from her and stares back up at the sky.


Makoto:     I thought it has been made clear, time and time again, 
            that I am NOT a lesbian.  Understand....  I am 
            heterosexual as the day is long.

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        Ah, so you turn into a lesbian when the sun goes down?

Makoto:     Of, fer Chrissakes!  I am NOT a lesbian.  Geddit?

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     Geddit?

Ami:        Got it.

Makoto:     Good.

Ami:        Repressed homosexual tendencies....  Definitely next on 
            the list of anime characters to be outed....

Makoto:     What did you say?

Ami:        Oh, nothing, nothing.


Ami makes a note in a small black book, and immediately hides it 
underneath her towel as Makoto comes tromping back.


Makoto:     You know....  It's strange how there's nobody else on 
            this beach.

Ami:        So?

Makoto:     Well, it's such a NICE beach, on such a NICE day....  
            One would have thought there'd be hundreds of people 
            here, jostling for position.

Ami:        Must be an off day.

Makoto:     Some off day.  I'm REALLY beginning to wonder where we 
            are, now....

Ami:        Why question such things when nothing is going wrong?

Makoto:     I've just got a weird feeling....

Ami:        You should NEVER eat the fish on the plane....  How many 
            times do I have to tell you....

Makoto:     No....  It's something else....  Like we're being 
            watched....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        Must be all those people out there.

Makoto:     What people?

Ami:        Out there.


Ami points towards the readers of this fic.  Makoto stares in the 
direction she is pointing, but shakes her head.


Makoto:     I can't see anything.


Cut to an opposing view.  Ami turns and points in that direction.


Ami:        Ah, they're over there, now.


Makoto turns with her, squinting.  Cut to the original view.  Ami
turns once more, smiling.


Ami:        Nope.  Looks like they think that's our best side.


Makoto looks down at Ami, then falls to her knees on her towel.


Makoto:     I think you've had too much sun.

Ami:        You can never have too much sun....  If skin cancer is
            your thing.

Makoto:     Now I KNOW you've had too much sun.

Ami:        Come to think of it, I am feeling a little strange.

Makoto:     Do you get the feeling we're being watched?

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        Actually, yes, I do....  Kinda kinky, isn't it?

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     You're just hoping it's some desperate pervert, since 
            you're normally hopeless with men.

Ami:        At least I had Urawa-kun....  All you ever did was 
            whinge and whine about an illusory long lost senpai....

Makoto:     Was NOT illusory.  He REALLY existed.

Ami:        Oh yeah?  Prove it.

Makoto:     How can I?  We're on a beach in the middle of nowhere.

Ami:        Hawaii.

Makoto:     What?

Ami:        We're on a beach in Hawaii....  It's not the middle of
            nowhere....  Technically speaking.

Makoto:     Are you so sure?  Are you so sure that this IS Hawaii?

Ami:        Can you prove to me that you really DID have a 
            boyfriend?

Makoto:     No.

Ami:        Well, I can't prove that this is Hawaii, either.

Makoto:     Then we're really in the middle of nowhere, after 
            all....

Ami:        Stop getting paranoid.

Makoto:     I'm NOT getting paranoid.

Ami:        Of course you are.  If we aren't in Hawaii, where are 
            we?

Makoto:     We could be.... in ANTARCTICA.

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        DOES THIS LOOK LIKE ANTARCTICA TO YOU?

Makoto:     No.

Ami:        Well, by process of elimination, taking into account the 
            fact that it is almost 100 degrees in the sun, it is 
            humid and that we are definately NOT freezing our butts 
            off whilst wearing these oh so SKIMPY swimsuits, you 
            could, just possibly, conceive that this is not, in the
            slightest way possible, Antarctica.

Makoto:     It could be out of season....

Ami:        I don't really think that would make much difference, do 
            you think?

Makoto:     No....  I was just clutching at straws.

Ami:        Pretty damn thin straws, if you ask me.

Makoto:     Hey, it was a nice idea at the time.

Ami:        Look....  This is Hawaii....  No ifs, no buts, okay?

Makoto:     Could be far north Queensland.

Ami:        WHAT?

Makoto:     Gotta be careful in far north Queensland....  They 
            inbreed them differently, up there....

Ami:        What ARE you talking about?

Makoto:     Never mind.

Ami:        I should think so, too....  And you're thinking of 
            Tasmania....  On a good day....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     I wonder how Haruka and Michiru are going....

Ami:        Yes, might be interesting to see....


Scene: By the wall in Tokyo.  Haruka has finished cutting Godot up
into a hundred little pieces and dumping them over the other side of
the wall.  Michiru looks on with distaste.


Michiru:    That's going to smell in time.

Haruka:     Would you have rathered listen to his stories?

Michiru:    Better than listening to Setsuna whine about her beloved
            Endymion when she's drunk one too many Sapporo 
            Lagers....

Haruka:     Hmph....  Is it any wonder the Philadelphia Experiment 
            went wrong....


END OF PART 10

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Will Minako ever arrive?  Are Ami and Minako really on a beach in
Far North Queensland (queue banjoes), have Haruka and Michiru really 
turned Godot into sushi, or is it just a figment of their 
imaginations.  See the next action packed, exciting and riveting 
chapter of the enthralling wait by Ami and Makoto in "Waiting For
Minako".  Brought to you by Sydney Water, where Giardia and 
Cryptospiridium are just a glassful away....  ^_^




Waiting for Minako
by DDFA (Mark A Page)

Part Eleven - The Sand

--------------------------------------------------------------------


Scene: A beach, supposedly in North Queensland (cue banjos) but this
has not been confirmed by our operatives.  Ami and Makoto are 
wandering the beach in the kind of skimpy swimsuits that would 
normally be used in an anime of ecchi standards.  Of course, this is
a fanfic, and so the vision of the pair wearing them is occurring 
entirely within your own mind, like the perverted, sick little creep
that you are.  ^_^  Both of them stare up at the bright sunshine 
that normally never happens in Queensland, since, much of it being 
in the tropics, the only thing one ever sees in the sky during the
daylight hours are the buildup of dark, threatening storm clouds 
that almost invariably turn into storms at about 4 in the afternoon.
Which is a good reason not to go there.  Try Adelaide on your next
holiday to Australia.  It might be boring as all fuck, but hey, you
can see the sun most of the time.  This message was brought to you 
by the South Australian Tourist Commission, the most underfunded 
tourist organisation in the Southern hemisphere.  It's tourist 
organisations like this that make a holiday to Uzbekistan seem like
such a logical choice.  ^_^


Ami:        It's hot.

Makoto:     Yes, it is, isn't it.

Ami:        Damned hot.

Makoto:     You're not wrong there.

Ami:        How long has it been since we left our towels?

Makoto:     I can't remember.

Ami:        Where did we leave our towels?

Makoto:     Back in Hawaii, I think.

Ami:        That's impossible.  We can't have walked from Hawaii to
            Northern Queensland.

Makoto:     Why?

Ami:        Because we would have gotten wet.  We would have brought 
            our towels in that case.

Makoto:     As normal, your logic surpasses mine.

Ami:        Of course it does.  My logic is a product of my vast 
            intelligence, which exceeds that of the rest of you put
            together.

Makoto:     And yet, you still fell for Urawa-kun.

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        We all have our crosses to bear.

Makoto:     That's a pretty big one.

Ami:        At least I GOT myself a boyfriend.  You just brag about
            a lost one.

Makoto:     Let's not start down that path, again.

Ami:        Sign of desperation.

Makoto:     I said....

Ami:        Do I foresee the long, lonely years ahead?

Makoto:     Look, if you don't shuddup, I'll smash your face through
            the back of your head.

Ami:        Touchy.

Makoto:     Am I just?

Ami:        Yup.

Makoto:     Urawa.

Ami:        Stop it....

Makoto:     Urawa Urawa Urawa Urawa Urawa....

Ami:        Stop that!

Makoto:     You stop bagging me for not having a boyfriend, then.

Ami:        Why not?  It's fun.

Makoto:     Amiiiiiiii.....

Ami:        Funny, too.

Makoto:     Listen, just one more word from your mouth, and I'll....

Ami:        Can I ask you a question?

Makoto:     WHAT!?!?

Ami:        Why do you always revert to violence to solve your 
            problems?  I do wish you were a tad more creative.

Makoto:     Oh.  Yeah, right.  I should have THOUGHT of that SO much
            sooner.  Well, I'm SO SORRY that I get a real KICK out 
            of beating the LIVING CRAP out of people who ANNOY the
            SHIT outta me.

Ami:        Tut tut tut....  All this stress is not doing you one 
            bit of good.

Makoto:     STRESS?  STRESS?  WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'M STRESSED?  
            I'M NOT STRESSED.  HOW DARE YOU THINK I'M STRESSED!

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        You see....  This is what comes from not having a 
            boyfriend.


Makoto grips Ami by the strap of her swimsuit top and pulls her 
forward, violently.


Makoto:     One instant head ventilation system, coming up....

Ami:        Wait, it was just a joke....


As Makoto lifts back her free fist to thump Ami one, a sand dune
drops on top of the pair of them, smothering them both with a 
cacophony of frightened cries.  After about a minute, their heads
pop out from the top of the dune.


Makoto:     Okay, Miss Brain, explain the sudden and rapid movement
            of this friggin' dune....  They're not supposed to move
            that quickly.

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     Ya can't, can ya?

Ami:        Give me a few moments to postulate a ridiculous, but due
            to current events, mildly possible, theory.


In the background, they can both hear the sounds of heavy machinery.


Makoto:     What the hell is that.

Ami:        Aha!  Now I KNOW this is Queensland.

Makoto:     What do you mean?

Ami:        Coastal land developers....  That's why the dune was 
            dumped on top of us.  They don't like cheap tourists.

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     Would you like a hand getting out of this dune?

Ami:        Actually, I rather like it here....  It's cooler in the
            sand than it is out of it.

Makoto:     If I don't get out of it, then I'm gonna become out of 
            it.  Would you mind explaining to me how we managed to 
            be in Queensland.

Ami:        Existentialist angst on the part of the author?

Makoto:     Yes, well, that would be a contributing factor.  By the
            way, isn't it about time one of us are killed?

Ami:        What do you mean?

Makoto:     He always kills one of us off, usually in the first 
            chapter....


Scene: Tokyo.  Usagi is sitting on a park bench, minding her own 
business, when from out of nowhere, an arrow goes through her head.
After putting on a silly expression of surprise for what seems to be
a minute, she falls to the ground, dead.  We return to the beach, 
where Ami is looking daggers at Makoto.


Ami:        Why'd you HAVE to remind him?

Makoto:     Ah, it's nothing....  He'll just resurrect her later.

Ami:        Yeah, to kill her again....

Makoto:     By the way, don't you feel rather silly having a 
            conversation whilst you are up to your neck in sand?

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        The sand....

Makoto:     What about it?

Ami:        It's awfully white.

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     What about it?

Ami:        Don't you think the sand is white?

Makoto:     Yes, it's awfully white.  What about it?

Ami:        I just thought I'd mention it.

Makoto:     What is the point?

Ami:        Hmm?

Makoto:     What is the point?

Ami:        What is the point of anything?  I really do wonder, 
            sometimes....

Makoto:     Not that!  I mean, what was the point of mentioning the
            colour of the sand?

Ami:        What is the point of anything?  I really do wonder, 
            sometimes....

Makoto:     .....

Ami:        .....

Makoto:     You didn't take your medication before we left, did you?


END OF PART 11

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Will Minako ever arrive?  Are Ami and Makoto buried up to their 
necks in sand, or is it just a figment of their imagination.  For no
answers to these questions, stay tuned for the next exciting chapter
of the interminable saga of Ami and Makoto in "Waiting for Minako".
Wrapped in a super-dimensional 3D txt file, maybe.  ^_^
   _________
  /    @    \  		DDFA (The Right Dishonourable Mark A Page)
 / / ^   ^ \ \ 		ayanami@merlin.net.au
/</    w    \>\		Chief Propoganda Officer, Keeper of
\/           \/		the Tapes and Co-Founder of the Saitou-chan
 \___________/		Appreciation Society - Adelaide Japanese
  /_/     \_\  PU		Animation Society