Subject: [FFML] [Slayers] Slayers ReBirth, Segment III : Mazoku Desires
From: Twoflower
Date: 8/27/1998, 1:54 AM
To: fanfic@fanfic.com

                     SPOOF CHASE PRODUCTIONS
                 (http://spoof.maison-otaku.net/)
                            PRESENTS...

                         Slayers ReBirth :
                  Segment III : Mazoku Desires

       A Slayers Fanfic Series by Stefan "Twoflower" Gagne

     (Almost all characters copyright H. Kanzaka / R. Araizumi,
     obviously.  If I ever even considered claiming that these
     were my own characters I'd probably be thrown into a small
     cell where I'd be forced to eat my own fanart to live.)

         --> Read the enhanced hypertext version at <--
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                         [=III======================] [-VII--]
      [-O--------------------] [-I---] [-II-] [-IV--] [------]
                                       [-VI---------] [------]
           Time -->            [-V------------------] [------]

                    ObWarning : Some Lime/Dark content.

-=-

    Finally!
    A young girl ran through city streets, clutching the blackened book of
magic to her chest.  A smile actually was on her face.  She had done it!
True, she had to burn down a large part of the school in the process, but
she had done it.  The truest book of dark magic was now hers.
    The city guard and the security at the magic school were probably after
her, but she knew this city like the back of her eyes.  Every twisted
alley, every shortcut through a refuse-strewn sidestreet, every nasty and
horrible place nobody bothered to go were her paths.  It was so easy to get
things done if you went places others didn't dare to go... and the things
you could do there!  She was smart enough despite her young age to see how
it all related, both disregarded city slums and dark magics others dare not
touch.  It was probably ironic.  Her literature teacher would be proud she
had made the connection.
    No, they wouldn't find her.  She wasn't going home again, to her empty
apartment home, which hadn't seen proper cleaning in three years.  She was
going to her workshop.
    At one time, the building had been a factory for smelting iron.  The
nice thing about it was that all the metal structures acted like a natural
buffer to muffle her magical experiments from the rest of the city, and
most importantly, from the guard.  If they knew...
    But idle thoughts could wait.  She had a purpose, after all.
    Shoving open the rusted door, she ran up to her main lab, to the
magical pentagram.  It was an inverted one -- much more powerful than the
standard ones, but tended to be more unstable.  Unstable, that is, if you
lacked control.  She had the control.  And now she had the book.
    The title roughly translated to 'The Dark Lore', and it was reportedly
a field manual for the Mazoku themselves.  It was captured by some of the
more prominent students of the sorcery school during the last Mazoku war,
and kept secure in the most ward-riddled room of the library.  She had
spent years studying in class for the express purpose of beating those
wards, and today, had succeeded.  In this book was the one spell she had
been wanting, wanting for three long, nasty years.
    She shoved some meaningless experimental materials aside, making room
on her desk.  The book opened roughly, the pages warped and crackling
beneath her fingers.  A quick skim through the book found the spell she
needed.  She found the right ingredients, which she had estimated would be
required beforehand, and started the chant, wrapping herself in black magic
like a blanket of cold.
    "Words spoken on a dark wind of will, spread with wings and let my call
be heard," she spoke, reading each symbol and translating as she went.
"Deep-Sea Dolphin.  Hellmaster Phibrizo.  Chaos-Dragon Gaav.  Dynast
Grauscherra.  Beastmaster Zelas-Metallum.  Come.  Come all, I beg thee,
allow me to supplant at your feet for the favor of Shaburanigdo, the demon
king of all.  I have prepared the way for my power to become your power.
Come.  Come all, I beg thee.  Allow--"
    "We heard you the first time," a gruff voice responded.
    The girl whirled around, facing.... three perfectly ordinary people.
    One of them was a tall warrior-type, with tanned skin and fire-red
hair.  Another was a young boy, perhaps her own age, with a pleasant smile
and wide eyes.  The third, staying near the back, was an older woman,
wearing the finest city clothes, fashions available for large budgets from
the best tailors.
    The warrior looked at the others.  "This is a first.  Some kid's
applying to be the Knight of Shaburanigdo.  How old was the last idiot that
tried this?"
    "Twenty four," the boy smiled.  "I like this.  It's funny."
    "We don't have time for this," the woman said.  "Let's kill her and
leave."
    The girl stepped forward.  "W-wait!  I spoke the words.  I deserve to
be heard!  I know how the spell works, and you guys need to hear my claim
and decide!"
    The warrior studied the tiny girl, sniffing the air... and frowning.
"I can see in her mind.  It's older than it looks by years, this isn't just
some stupid kid.  She knows what she's doing and wants to do it.  The
brat's going to put up a fight, isn't she?"
    "I think it will be fun," the boy smiled.  "We don't get together often
and we don't have entertainment when we do.  Let's hear her.  My name is
Phibrizo, and this tall person is Gaav.  The woman is Zelas-Metallum.  The
other two were busy and couldn't come, sorry, nice girl."
    The girl immediately got on one knee, despite her school uniform
getting in the way.  "Please... I want to be the Knight.  The Knight of
Shaburanigdo."
    "Kid, let's be frank here," Gaav said bluntly.  "Shaburanigdo's toast.
He's been chunked into seven parts and isn't likely to pop his head up to
let you be his representative.  The Mazoku don't need some screwy human
gumming up the works by pretending to be the unholy Knight.  This
position's gone unfilled for about three hundred years, and we're not
really interested, you know?  We have our own agendas and problems to deal
with.  So if you ask nicely, we'll just tear your head off to put with the
other morons who've tried this and call it a day.  However, if you insist
on wasting our time, we can be less merciful..."
    "You have to hear me out," the girl said, voice on edge of cracking.
"You have to!"
    "Don't be mean," Phibrizo warned the older Mazoku lord.  "She's a funny
little girl.  I wanna hear her."
    The woman, Zelas-Metallum, stepped up beyond the others.
    "Words are inefficient..." she said, darkness flowing down her arm,
gathering over an outstretched hand.  "I will open her mind instead."
    The girl froze.  "What--"

                                   [()()]

     She was born eleven years ago, and named at birth Lara Benzedi.  It
was her mother's last name and her father's choice for a first name.  She
showed exceptional ability, even at a young age, learning to read before
any other children her age, able to do basic math early with numbered
blocks.  Her mother guarded her and tutored her, keeping her safe from all
harm, rarely letting her out into the urban metropolis of Zefielia's
capital city.  She--
    "Boring," Zelas-Metallum said, echoing from outside Lara's memory.
    "I have a million and one things I could be doing rather than watching
some kid's memories," Gaav commented.  "She shows promise, for a human, but
is she special in any way?"
    "I'll move on."
    --tapping magical powers when others were riding bikes, studying books
of magic.  Lara had no problems staying indoors and playing, because the
times she went out, the people were idiots and called her names and made
fun of her mother, whom she loved.
    But she did enjoy exploring the city at night, because there were a
whole bunch of places where nobody lived that had fun things in them.  Some
homeless people lived there, as well as bandits and thugs, but that just
meant more practice, and practice made perfect.  Mommy said so and mommy
loved her.
    Her daddy didn't think the same way, she thought, but he didn't talk
much.  He didn't show up much.  He was a traveling merchant and could only
see her when he was in town, but he always had a smile and a nice gift and
that's all Lara wanted from him.  He made mommy happy too, which was good.
Mommy loved Daddy.  She was very happy with the pearls he gave her today,
and they spent a longer time together upstairs than usual.
    "Now remember, Lara," her mother smiled, that afternoon.  "Black magic
is the only real power.  White magic is useful and Shamanism is funny but
only by specializing strong black magic can you hurt people you need to
hurt."
    "Okay, mommy!" she smiled.  Because her mother was always right.  And
the next day, she decided to practice by crushing those people next door
who kept talking about her mommy behind her back, saying how she shouldn't
have been let out of the hospital and was a danger to the community.  And
then she hurt the people who came asking how those people got hurt.  But
eventually this got boring, so--
    "Fun family," Gaav mocked.  "You know, it's true.  Humans can be total
freaks if you drop them in the right environment.  You think we should
start a genetics program?"
    "It would be a waste of time," Beastmaster Zelas-Metallum said simply.
    "I like her," Phibrizo said, smiling mentally.  "But she was a nice kid
then and now seems adult.  Why is that?"
    "I'll ask her."
    --found out that her daddy wasn't just her daddy, he was some other
kids' daddy too.  But Lara didn't care, because she was the most special
one to him, and he always had a smile for her.  And today, he'd smile best
of all!  And mommy would hug her and be very happy.
    She had amazing news!
    She was accepted to the magical school!  The youngest student yet.  She
showed how good she was by throwing her testing professor around the room
when she got bored with the tests.  He said she had the strongest power
he'd ever seen -- and in Zefielia, a land known for exceptional
sorceresses, that meant a lot.  It meant Lara was more special than anybody
else, even Daddy's other daughters, anybody in the world!
    "Mama!  Mama!!" Lara called out, running up the stairs that led to her
mom's apartment.  Her certificate of admission was tightly wadded in her
hand, her fingers gripping it proudly.  She threw open the door, and
entered... and saw them fighting.
    "If I don't go, Jessica's going to be suspicious!  She already is!"
Daddy shouted.  "My daughter was kidnapped, for crying out loud.  It's
going to look bad if I don't start doing the good father thing immediately
to make up for this.  I can't come to the city anymore, and that's final!"
    Lara ran to her room to get out of the way of the fight.  They had
fought a few other times, and her room made a good place to stay, reading
her magic books and waiting for it to stop--
    "When does this get interesting, Zelas?  I've got things to do."
    "Be patient, Gaav."
    --had to wait an hour or three before Daddy left.  She heard Mommy
crying, but assumed it would all be okay, because Mommy got very emotional
from time to time.  Emotional was one of the important words she knew well.
    Once everything was nice and quiet, she decided she'd go show Mommy her
certificate.  Then she'd be happy and everything would be fine.  It was a
very good plan!
    Lara hopped off her bed, and ran to her mother's room, twisting the
knob and entering.
    "Mama, look at me!  I'm going to be the best sorceress ever!" she
declared.
    Her mother was busy adjusting some kind of bedsheet, hanging from a
ceiling beam.  She had to stand on a stool to reach it.
    "That's nice, honey," she said absently.  "I'm going to go now.  Excuse
me."
    Lara's mommy stepped off the stool, and hung in the air.  Lara didn't
quite understand why--
    "WHA-hoa!!" Gaav cheered.  "Sweet.  Kid's mom commits suicide right in
front of her.  That would break the human mind, wouldn't it?  That whole
psychology thing really sticks it in and breaks it off."
    "Can I keep her?" Phibrizo asked.  "She has a lot of pain and hatred.
It tastes very good.  Maybe I could enjoy that for a few years.  She's
funny and I like her, like my little devil I made for the prison."
    "There is more here, but this is taking too long.  I will summarize,"
Zelas said, patient and calm.  Her memories span through in a blur, running
in the city, more magic, pretending to take classes and pay attention,
learning and hating... "She seems to wish to destroy the world and
everybody in it, especially the other girls her father spawned.  The usual
trite human will."
    "She's strong," Phibrizo said.  "She could serve."
    "We don't NEED a Knight of Shaburanigdo.  It's a stupid idea," Gaav
sulked.  "And I don't trust anybody you'd approve of, Phibby.  Besides,
what would a human be able to do that a Mazoku can't?  I don't care how
strong she is, it's not merited.  Let's just kill her and go have dinner."
    In a winding motion, Zelas skimmed back over one detail... and smiled
widely.
    "You know I hate that look," Gaav warned.  "Spit it out."
    "I will ask her one question that will convince you all, regardless of
allegiance to our individual causes," Zelas said.  "One moment while I
release her mind."
    The room snapped back into sharp relief.  Lara sank to her knees, all
the breath sucked from her lungs, weak in front of the three Mazoku lords.
    Zelas-Metallum gestured, unseen force tugging upwards on Lara's chin,
to raise her eyes to meet theirs.
    "Tell me, little thing, who is your father?" the Beastmaster asked her
prey.
    "Os-Oswald Inverse," Lara said.
    The other two Mazoku looked thoughtful.
    "You're right.  This mungs things, doesn't it?" Gaav asked.  "Inverse.
The man's little more than a comma on the pages of history, but his family
name isn't.  Inverse... it's the same as that blasted Knight of Ceipheed."
    "Not to mention the younger one, Lina Inverse," Beastmaster said.  "The
one who cast the Giga Slave.  I have my top man, Xelloss, looking after
her.  I suspect she will develop in interesting ways..."
    "Lina and Luna are funny humans," Phibrizo agreed.  "Lina has the Giga
Slave.  She interests me.  The illegitimate Inverse daughter as the Knight
of Shaburanigdo would also be very neat.  I like this a lot."
    "S'got a ring," Gaav admitted.  "If those two little kittens prove to
be a pain, we'll have an antidote ready.  Shaburanigdo isn't going to be
talking to her anytime soon, so she'd be ours to control.  All three of us,
not just any one of us.  The other two can find their own pet human.  This
is assuming she survives the testing and modifications, of course..."
    All three Mazoku looked at Lara Benzedi Inverse, sizing her up.  They
were smiling.
    "I'm going to have a lot of fun," Phibrizo said.  And meant it.

                                   [()()]

    One year she spent in the care of Zelas-Metallum.  The Beastmaster
changed her into a rabbit, and hunted her relentlessly through Wolf Pack
Island, taking the form of a ravenous dog hungry for her flesh.  Lara
learned how to hide and evade, and eventually, how to set traps and be
clever.  All the whole, a slow bitterness seeped into her.
    "This is the Slow Poison, child," the wolf spoke into the rabbit's
mind.  She had a strangely loving voice, of a predator that cared dearly
about the prey.  "It's a key component we feed any human we catch.  You'll
learn to embrace it eventually."
    It was a year spent in fear, with Lara sometimes unable to remember who
she was.  But she kept her burning desire, her wish to be the Knight of
Shaburanigdo, and let the Mazoku lords play with her.  That she wouldn't
let Zelas-Metallum destroy or dissuade.
    The next year she spent in the care of Chaos-Dragon Gaav, but he didn't
have any real use for her.
    "What am I supposed to do with some human female I don't need or want?"
Gaav complained.  "You're no knight, you're just some kid the others wanted
to have fun with.  They're that bored with life.  Fine, fine; you can be my
servant.  I suppose it's as good a job as any, and maybe you'll learn
something."
    So Lara joined the servant's staff, which lived in mortal terror of
Gaav, being captured humans themselves under the command of a Mazoku
headmistress.  Lara never caught on why they hated Gaav and spoke of him
like they did in hushed tones.  Lara understood Gaav, how irritated he was
with how things were, and would blow off steam by lashing out.  He was at
least the most bluntly honest person she had ever known.  She picked up
many interesting skills working on his staff, as well.
    The next year was spent in the care of Hellmaster Phibrizo, and he
turned out to be even more honest.
    "I don't think you're much of a knight," he explained.  "So I don't
care about training you, I just want to play with you until you die.  It'll
be fun, and I don't think the others will really care."
    He condemned her to the prison he had created in his name, Hell, where
humans, Dragons and Mazoku who had displeased him were incarcerated.
There, Lara spent a great deal of time doing little else than suffering in
a variety of ways.  Phibrizo personally handled most of this, since he was
about as bored as the others.  He made it his goal to grind down Lara's
desire to be the Knight, desire to burn the world, any motivation she could
have.
    He very nearly succeeded, given his mastery of such things.  Lara might
have been strong, but she was human, and the Mazoku had been learning
methods to break humans for longer than history remembered.  She slowly
lost herself and everything she stood for, worked on constantly by Phibrizo
in his boredom, to the point where she simply was waiting to die...
    Then the Dark Lord was resurrected.
    Lara remembered that day most of all the days she spent in the prison.
It was the best day she had ever had in her life.
    She was in her cell, curled up in the ball she usually assumed when
sleeping, drifting in and out of bad dreams when the voice spoke to her.
    I have returned, he said, a voice booming like evil on top of hate on
top of madness.  /I, Shaburanigdo, have been reborn through the eyes of
Rezo.  Awaken, child./
    Lara sat up straight, the voice like a cool drink of water in the
desert.  "L-Lord?  Is it you?"
    /They have treated you very badly,/ Shaburanigdo growled.  /As humans
should be.  But their disrespect to me in the process, ignoring your
intended position, will not be tolerated.  You are not a toddler, a joke,
or a plaything.  Awaken.  Arise.  You are the Knight of Shaburanigdo, and
will serve your purpose well, whether I am here or not.../
    And she finally saw the face of her lord, the twisted monster's face...
and it almost seemed to smile at her.  A fire-crackling hand reached out,
caressing her cheek... she screamed from the pain and the delight, like a
father bestowing a kiss as a reward for a job well done.
    Lara stood up tall.  Her mind broke free of the black poison it was
being fed, and she felt more sure about herself than she had in years, her
will, her desire returning to her.  Her wits and her mind were free and her
independence solid.  Sentience.
    "Thank you," Lara said, smiling for the first time in years.  "I won't
let you down."
    /No.  You won't.  Now go, and do as you wish./

                                   [()()]

    On Wolf Pack Island, Beastmaster Zelas-Metallum was busy reviewing
notes from Xelloss.  Interesting reading material... if this was accurate,
and the Mazoku priest had rarely been inaccurate, Shaburanigdo was
reborn... and no less than a day afterwards, Lina Inverse had--
    The doors of her throne room simultaneously imploded and exploded, torn
to subatomic particles by a blast of darkness.
    The bodies of Gaav and Phibrizo were tossed into the room casually.
They weren't fatally injured, but had enough scrapes and bruises to show
they were muscled, and muscled by someone stronger than they were.
    Lara Inverse, Knight of Shaburanigdo, stepped into the throne room
after them.
    "Your pals needed a lesson in manners," Lara said, stepping on Gaav's
back as she approached Beastmaster.  "Your Lord doesn't like you playing
with his daughter like some common human, you know.  And now that he's
back, there's going to be some changes acknowledged.  You want to handle
this the easy way or do we have to get into one of those climactic magical
battles that lower the property values?  It's a nice island, and I've got
some fondly bad memories of it.  Hate to see it burn."
    Zelas-Metallum frowned.
    "You are not Lara," she said.  "Lara was a stupid little girl.  Clever,
but weak--"
    "I'm new and improved," Lara smiled, posing.  "My dark lord's given me
the juice.  I don't exist in your hierarchy, and I'm not your toy.  That
okay with you?  Last chance to answer."
    Beastmaster held out the written report.  "Your lord is dead.  Lina
Inverse crushed him shortly after his arrival."
    The Knight froze.  She trembled, feeling a loss she couldn't explain.
"D-Dead?"
    "Seems your rival is not a trivial matter any more," Beastmaster said.
"I have no problems with your place in things.  You've certainly given the
boys something to think about regarding it.  But now what will you do,
without Shaburanigdo to guide you, left hand of darkness?"
    "I'll KILL HER!" Lara shouted, hands balled into fists.  "The SECOND
time she's taken away my... MY--"
    "Not yet," Zelas-Metallum said.  "We need to know more about Lina
first.  I have my top spy on the job.  I realize I cannot order you, but I
can suggest as an advisor that you wait.  More important things are afoot.
Now, I ask again.  What will you do?"
    Lara trembled with rage... barely suppressed, contained, controlled.
Calming, ordering herself down.
    "Just because he's put to sleep again doesn't mean he won't return,"
she said, through tight jaws.  "Even Lina Inverse can't destroy
Shaburanigdo.  I'll be around.  Working for his causes.  You'll see me
again, Beastmaster."

                                   [()()]

    Years went by without any word from the Dark Lord, but Lara didn't
mind.  She was too busy.
    After all, didn't she have His cause to promote?  She started out
small, just stretching her legs after what felt like years as a worm, a
crawling thing that had no power and no mind.  Lara had already given Gaav
and Phibrizo a roughing, and decided to call it even; she dropped in on
them from time to time for favors or just to annoy them.  Gaav was busy
with his own plots and plans, and usually shouted at her until she decided
to leave (usually deciding to when he finally stopped shouting).  Phibrizo
still looked down at her as a human plaything, so she tried to make herself
as much of a nuisance as possible.
    As a result of her meddling, she now understood why the Mazoku tended
to fight and argue and occasionally assassinate each other.  They had
nothing better to do.  By standing outside things, she had a clearer view.
    The Dragons and the Mazoku were in what essentially amounted to a
staring contest.  Every now and then one would strike at the other or
launch some amazing plan of action that didn't amount to much, but neither
had the strength to start up the Mazoku Wars again.  Shaburanigdo slept in
seven pieces, and as for Ceipheed... who knew?  If he wanted to support his
ranks, he'd show up more.  As is, nobody had heard from him since the last
war.
    So here was Lara, enjoying amazing freedom that came from having such
power and immunity.  She could taunt the Mazoku at will, who really lacked
any faith in the demon king when he wasn't looking, and occasionally harass
the dragons.  She took up a residence, more or less, in Evilania and tried
to convince the fools there how to properly serve the dark lord.  (They
never quite caught on, mind you.)  Every now and then, for fun, she'd
sabotage a human community or two.  Sometimes small things, like destroying
trust between friends, and sometimes meddling in politics -- an amusing
game.  Life was good.
    One year or so later, she heard word... Gaav and Phibrizo were dead,
supposedly at the hands of Lina Inverse.
    Lara had no real attachment to the two.  She hated them, but she knew
that hate was just love with its back turned, a tidbit told to her long ago
by an acquaintance... so, when their respective minions chose to hold
mourning services (what a joke!) she was there to attend.
    Zelas-Metallum, the only surviving Mazoku lord with any sway over the
population, was there as well.
    "This limits us," she said.  "Dynast and Deep-Sea rarely get involved
in the affairs of the Mazoku.  Am I to be expected to direct all our
efforts now that these two fools killed each other in a quest for power?
They lacked the graces of a true predator, and now we all suffer as their
blunder puts them in Lina's deathgrip."
    "You have someone watching Lina.  Why not just have him assassinate
her?" Lara asked.  "If not him, I'll do it."
    "It's not that simple.  First of all, he has grown.. an attachment for
her.  I can sense it without even asking.  My prey is playing games with me
now, losing his focus.  In addition, we still don't know her role in
things.  What part could she possibly play?  Her sister Luna should
technically be the crux of our problems, but we rarely hear from the
so-called Knight of Ceipheed.  None of this makes sense, and until I know
for certain, I will not make dangerous moves.  We are too weak to take
risks now."
    "If I hear anything or learn of anything, I'll tell you," Lara
promised.  "I hate you dearly, Beastie, but anything that promotes our
Lord's cause is key."
    "You may be the only one among us who actually seeks to promote a cause
other than their own," Beastmaster said.  "Myself included.  And the irony
is that you aren't even Mazoku.  Surely you recognize this paradox?"
    "I recognize Paradox," Lara nodded.  "And he taught me not to give a
damn about things like that."

                                   [()()]

    Months passed.  Lara's seventeenth birthday came and went without a
family celebration, since her human dad had disowned her, her mom hung
herself and her true father was still asleep in the dark hearts of man.
That's exactly how she phrased it to the cafe waiter who served her the
cupcake she asked for.
    "Ah... interesting," the man said.  "Excuse me."
    He swapped her table with some waitress, who Lara decided to scare by
setting fire to her bill in protest of the high prices.  Overall, a pretty
average evening, but she got no pleasure out of it.
    It had been more than three years since the only time she heard her
father's voice, urging her out into the world to do as she pleased -- and
it pleased her to help her father spread fear, terror and destruction.
That's all she had done with her life, and felt satisfaction knowing that
she was so completely devoted to Shaburanigdo.  The problem was not how she
felt about her life, but how she felt about her work.
    Perhaps she wasn't taking large enough risks, or making big enough
plans.  Of course, people to make large risky plans are idiots and die in
nasty ways -- like Phibrizo.  Stupid little brat tried to subvert the Lord
of Nightmares, which is just stupid.  Even Shaburanigdo answers to Her.  At
the moment.
    But if Lara really was going to fill her pledge to the final cause of
the Mazoku, that being the complete destruction of everything that exists,
she was going to have to aim higher.
    She hated the world, true, but that's not why she wanted to see it go
boom.  No, she wanted to make father happy.  To show that even though she
had the handicap of not being born Mazoku, she could out-Mazoku any of
those scheming, self-interested bastards at their own game.  She'd be the
chosen one!  Well, she WAS the chosen one, but she'd show the whole world
eventually.
    For fun, she let herself be arrested for setting fire to the cafe.
Besides, she had been evicted from the inn for not bothering to pay the
man.  She intended to threaten him into a free stay, but never got around
to it, too busy causing havoc and despair around town.
    A jail cell wasn't a comfortable place to stay, but it was a solid roof
and had all the luxuries she needed; flat surface to sleep on and a roof.
Lara had herself thrown behind bars with nary a frown or a grumble, and
caught some Z's.
    Her dreams were the usual round of Nightmares, of nooses and screaming,
and of the various ways the Mazoku lords kept themselves entertained with
her.  She had learned to ignore the things by now.  After all, once you
recognize such obvious dream symbolism and themes, it's just like reading
the same bad novel over and over; you shut it out, been there, done that,
got the t-shirt.
    Then, halfway through her dreams, she heard His voice again.
    Her soul filled with joy, feeling the presence of the demon king.  This
time, he came to her in vision and sound, the malformed beast of all,
gigantic beyond gigantic, his power overwhelming and crushing to her mind.
    The scenery was odd... Shaburanigdo hovered inside a world of perfect
lines, silver streaks of such perfect right angles, forming a four
dimensional matrix of gridlines.  Tiny gray, white and black lights ran in
mathematical patterns along the lines, forming and reforming with each
other in patterns she could identify...
    But it was definitely Shaburanigdo.  He didn't seem to fit in here, but
who was Lara to say what He could or could not do?
    "Lara.  Knight of Shaburanigdo," the beast recognized.  "I greet thee."
    Lara was on her knees immediately.  "I'm pleased to see you again,
father.  Tell me your will, so that I may manifest it in your world."
    Shaburanigdo got right down to business, no caring words or emotions
whatsoever.  "You must locate the pieces of the Most Important Thing In The
World.  With that, you alone can destroy everything as you always have
wanted.  I will guide you first to the manacles, which are held underground
by a tribe of chimeras.  Obtain them at any price.  Follow this vision to
find them--"
    --her mind reeled away from her jail cell, across the lands and seas,
into a cave and through a network of tunnels and into a large underground
city--
    "--that is all.  I will contact you again," Shaburanigdo said.
    "I will do this for you!!" Lara declared.  "I have waited long for this
moment.  Thank you, father!"
    The vision left her quickly, task complete.  Lara felt a pang of
disappointment.. no encouragement, not even a threat.  Nothing.  Strange.
    But His will was His will.  Her mind had the path burned into it.
She'd have to make a trip across the sea to Pleasantville and into the
cave, then win the confidence of the tribe and sneak out the object... no
need to endanger it by blasting her way to it.
    And if it really could end the world, fulfill her wish...
    She smiled.
    Wouldn't Zelas-Metallum just turn GREEN with envy?

                                   [()()]

    As usual, Lara didn't bother announcing her arrival in the throne room
of the Beastmaster.  She simply appeared in place and started talking.
    "Shaburanigdo has spoken to me," she smiled.  "He--"
    "Impossible.  He hasn't been resurrected," Beastmaster said, not
looking up from her written reports from various spies.  "I would know,
given all the networks I have."
    That's not the reaction Lara wanted.  She whipped out a lance of black
power, and slashed the table carrying Zelas-Metallum's paperwork in half.
    "It was HIM," Lara emphasized.
    Beastmaster sighed.  "Fine, fine.  What did he supposedly say, little
human?"
    "I'm going on a quest to recover items of power," Lara explained.
"Ones that can smash the world apart and finish the Mazoku cause."
    "And what items are these?"
    "The Most Important Things In The World."
    "An absurd name for an absurd notion," Zelas yawned.  "Why wouldn't--"
    And Shaburanigdo was there!  Framed in the glowing quicksilver lines of
math, he appeared in the throne room.  Just like that.  He reached out,
striking Zelas-Metallum, flashing a pulse of the most amazing agony ever
seen in the world down her spine... just enough to be convincing.
    "You will work with Lara," he said, and vanished.
    Lara looked positively smug.
    Beastmaster struggled to return to her throne, clutching at her heart.
She glared at Lara.  "How... how did you do that?!"
    "Me?  I don't recall doing anything.  Now, Shabby, that's another
matter..."
    "That was NOT Shaburanigdo!!"
    "Can you afford to be wrong?" Lara asked honestly.  The whole situation
was really amusing, though; making the Beastmaster crawl for her!  The very
thought!
    "I don't see what I can do," Beastmaster stated, glaring at Lara as she
regained her composure.  "If it's a quest for you, it's a quest for you
alone.  You've never worked with one of us."
    "I'm not going to take stupid chances like your pals do," Lara said.
"And we're not going to let the Inverse Wonder Kids stomp on this.  You are
going to help me think of a way to keep them at bay while I get the goods."

    "Lina is busy on some foolish quest.  I already have an agent named
Bugger tailing her," Zelas-Metallum said.  "As for Luna... I don't even
know where she is.  This is something I will admit to, as Luna is not easy
prey.  How do you plan to keep her out of your hair, human?  I have no
ideas."
    Lara sat in thoughtful repose.
    And eventually, the idea came to her.  Just as simple as that.
    "It's easy," Lara said.  "We threaten the humans and raise enough
ruckus to make nobody even consider looking elsewhere for trouble.  We do
the unthinkable, the greatest threat ever to be seen in a millennium.
Namely... you're going to start the Third Mazoku War.  Congratulations,
General Zelas."
    It was worth the stunned look on the predator's face.  Yes... Lara
thought.  I'm in control now.  Not you.  Me.

                                   [()()]

    It took more arguing than that, but the decision had been set; the
Mazoku were going to war... at least, the semblance of a war.  Zelas could
spare enough troops to tangle with the Dragons, target large human
resources and cause damage.  It would be more than enough to set the home
fires burning, if not enough to be considered a full apocalypse.  They'd
delay the start until after Lara had the manacles, just in case she failed
somehow; less loss that way.  Lara would go alone, to attract less
attention, and would keep Zelas updated.
    Step one... the manacles.  Likely just one part of many, Lara figured.
But she'd get them, get them with style, and get them successfully.  Lara
knew that to pull off a true deception, one had to do unthinkable things.
    Her first stop was to visit a Mazoku known as the Costume Queen.  She
was a very special purpose Mazoku, covering the realm of hideous fashion
and clever deceit, helper to spies and thieves everywhere.  C.Q. was also
Zelas-Metallum's personal advisor on all human fashion trends, which
Beastmaster had an abnormal interest in -- childish, Lara considered.
    C.Q. was only happy to help.
    "Daaahling, you have no idea how much I've wanted to work with you,"
she smiled, vaguely feline appearance radiating cozy comfort.  "To have a
human aligned with us that would hold still while I experimented with
clothing... truly a maaaarvelous thing!"
    "I can't stay long," Lara warned.  "I just need your help assembling a
costume.  You'd be directly helping Shaburanigdo."
    "Who?"
    "The demon king!"
    "Oh!  Oh, sorry.  I had forgotten the pronunciation.  No offense
intended, mais oui?" C.Q. smiled.  "Very well.  I'd simply love to assist.
What do you need?"
    "What do you know about the Hi'Chi'Orld?"
    "The chimeras?" C.Q. asked.  She fehed with as much contention as she
could muster.  "Fashion nightmares.  Totally unimaginative.  They haven't
changed fashions in years--"
    "Are they friendly?  Generally loving of life?  Would they take in a
perfect stranger, for instance?"
    "Why ask me?  There are cultural study Mazoku you could consult."
    "I heard once you could learn a lot about a people from their arts,"
Lara buttered up.  "Such as... fashion.  In fact, I bet fashion is a
wonderful indicator.  And if anybody knows fashion, it would be you, the
world's foremost expert... right?"
    C.Q. preened proudly.
    "Why, of course.  Yes.. yes, I'd say they're stupid enough to take in a
stranger.  But to REALLY embrace one with open arms, it'd have to be a hard
luck case."
    "That's what I figured," Lara said, confirming her idea.  "Here's what
I need you to do.  I want an outfit that just screams 'refugee from a
thousand terrors'.  You know, shredded clothes, fake bruises, messy hair,
the whole nine yards.  Kicked puppy feeling.  Someone they'd immediately
take indoors and nurse back to health..."
    "...after which you'd turn on them.  Delightful!" C.Q. agreed.  "But
they're a perceptive race.  Not in terms of emotions or motives, but
appearance.  They'd spot fake bruises immediately, being so fact driven as
they are.  No, no... for a true costume, you WILL have to go the whole nine
yards."
    "What do you mean...?"
    "I know a Mazoku named Glonk.  He's large and mean looking, but very
precise," C.Q. stated.  "I'll direct his efforts like a painter with a
brush.  Then I'll have a specialist in famine handle draining your energy
and muscle to keep you feral... surely you aren't afraid of a little pain,
Knight of Shaburanigdo?"
    Lara hardened.  "Of course not.  Whatever it takes to make His will
into reality."
    And she meant it, too.  Unlike the other Mazoku, hypocrites all, she
would do anything required.  Anything.

                                   [()()]

    Staggering, Lara reached out blindly in the dark, finding only the
jagged rocks of cave walls to help her.
    How long had she been wandering down here?  One day?  One hour?  One
week?  Disorientation kicked her in the head every time she tried to clock
it.  C.Q.'s friends had done good work.  For the first time since her
initiation rites under the three Mazoku lords, she was miserably weak, and
wracked with genuine pain.
    She swallowed any complaints.  It was for the cause.  Father would be
proud of the lengths she went to.  She just needed to rest a little.  Yes,
to rest....
    And her world went from vertical to horizontal, body collapsing to the
ground.  The chimeras had better find her.  Lara did NOT intend to die down
here from these obligatory injuries.  Dead souls that failed the Mazoku
sometimes go to Phibrizo's realm, and she had visited Hell once already,
without finding it to her liking.
    Time passed.  How much, she didn't bother to check.
    Finally, a boy.. it was probably a boy... came into her fuzzy view.
Seeing her, he quickly went to her side.
    "Miss!  Are you okay!?"
    Perfect.  Relieved, Lara let go of her consciousness, and drifted
away...

                                   [()()]

    Lara knew exactly what part to be playing here.  You take one part
vulnerability, one part nervousness, two parts thankful humility, one part
meek, one fake name (Luna was her favorite) and mix 'em up... bammo,
Instant Victim(tm).  Even when she faded in and out of consciousness, the
chimera doctor using magics and potions and healing methods to revive her,
she made sure to fit her role with coughing she didn't need, scared looks
she wasn't feeling and mumbled words which could be constructed in ominous
ways.
    After a day or two of this, she was strong enough to sit up, talk and
stay awake.  Nobody suspected that Lara was faking her illnesses and
injuries, because she wasn't faking them; she actually was ill and
injured.  While she got back the energy to walk so that she could really
case the town and see what she was up against, she started to learn a few
things about her 'saviors'.
    The one who had found her was a boy named Chi'Bi.  He was a scrawny
sort, unable to find the right words to say in any situation and very
nervous around her.  She figured he was about the same age as her, but
since she felt she was at least ten years older in her head, that made him
a boy.
    "I'm real glad to see you're okay," he said.  "You had us all worried."
    "I was worried too," Lara smiled falsely.  "All those monsters... but
you look strong enough to handle them.  I wish I had taken a bodyguard with
me, or something, instead of exploring that cave myself."
    Chi'Bi blushed.  Lara couldn't see it very well through his stone skin,
but it was something in the eyes that gave it away.  "Gosh, miss... well...
when you gotta go home, I could bring you back!  I'm okay with a sword and
I'm learning new stuff every day."
    "That would be great!" she said, relieved.
    Relieved, mostly because she had found her weak link to work on.
    Chi'Nai wouldn't serve her purposes; the girl was pretty vacant,
without a strong reaction to anything.  In fact, most of the chimeras were
emotionless, from what she saw once she could walk under her own power.  It
was like a tribe of machines.  She sat in the same sidewalk cafe for three
days to check this theory, and saw the same chimeras running the same
errands at the same times, day in, day out.
    So far, the only ones she had identified as being possible patsies were
Chi'Leas and Chi'Bi.  Chi'Leas was a senile, doddering old fool, constantly
rambling about this thing or another, and taking this whole 'worship chaos'
thing way too far.  He liked to stop by and 'talk' at Lara, and she'd have
to put up with every boring minute of it.  No, Lara couldn't see any angles
to work on there.  But Chi'Bi...
    The boy was emotionally dead, like the others.  From what she was able
to observe when she spied on him from her temple guest room window, to
other chimeras, he was as routine as the rest of the lot.  But whenever he
came in to supply her with food or fresh bandages, he tripped over himself
to try to contain emotions.  Clearly, she had triggered something in him
and being such a psychological baby, he was having trouble coping with it.
    Now all she had to do was identify it and exploit it.
    The first step happened entirely by itself; the second seemed
immediately obvious.

                                   [()()]

    The mission had taken a week.  Time was hard to measure in this
underground city, but she had an internal clock like a Daratan Watch, and
kept tabs.  She had made a few check-ins with Zelas-Metallum, more out of
who-cares generosity than any genuine desire to keep the Mazoku informed.
Lara could handle things herself without their help.
    But there was still the Chi'Bi situation.  It seemed so obvious, so
ordinary that she was clearly overlooking it by probing too deeply into the
boy's psyche.  In a sweaty, nasty afternoon of frustration, Lara decided
cooling off and approaching from a new direction was the only way.
Fortunately, these chimeras had heard of indoor plumbing, so a private bath
was all hers to relax in.
    Unfortunately, they had yet to figure out what 'Privacy' meant, and put
that bath in the main guest room.
    Chi'Bi walked on in carrying her dinner tray.
    "Hello!" he greeted, spreading a smile he only kept for her.  "I
brought you your WAARGHGHHH!!!"
    Needless to say, the dinner would have to be enjoyed by the carpet
rather than Lara.
    "Don't you know how to knock?" Lara demanded, grabbing a towel.  It was
a rare slip to her usual speech, but suitable.
    "Sorry!!" Chi'Bi apologized, turning--
    No, wait.  He didn't turn right away.  No... he got a good eyeful.
    Oh, of all the...!  Lara was thankful for the revelation and grumbling
internally at the same time.  Of course.  Some recluse who's never seen a
human before, much less an attractive and female one, who's probably got a
bit of a twitch to him to begin with.  Naturally that's what his angle
would be.  Such a stupidly simple thing!
    On the plus side, it would be very, very easy to take advantage of.  On
the minus side, Lara didn't particularly care to take advantage of it.  It
was, after all, so typically evil to do and typically 'wicked wanton
sorceress'.  If word got out about this, she'd never live down the jokes,
becoming a living anecdote of villainy.  Of course, none of that truly
mattered, she simply liked to complain before acting.
    Unlike the other Mazoku, she would do anything required.  Anything.
    Pasting her best purrrring feline smile on her face, she stepped out of
the tub.  "Now now, no need to apologize..."

                                   [()()]

    There was one flaw in her plan, but she only saw it in hindsight.
    The chimeras clearly had underdeveloped emotions.  But they weren't
dead feelings, simply submerged... and when you deliberately pull one out
of the mire using every tool and technique you have, you can expect it to
be a bit uncontrollably strong.  And wild.
    Not that she couldn't handle the brat physically, but his psyche
started getting whacked out from word one.  He spent far, far more time
hanging around Lara than before, and unsure of exactly what was happening
to him, was clumsy with handling every emotion he had left.  If this kept
up, others would notice how the reclusive guy suddenly was a spastic,
nervous wreck who seemed to be addicted to something... and that would
inevitably draw attention to Lara.  So she decided to accelerate things.
    First, she got him as hooked as she possibly could, until he was little
more than an emotional wreck, dependent on Lara.  It was surprisingly
easy.  Then she simply let the disguise drop, one night.
    "You'd to anything to help me, right?" she soothed, playing with the
kid's sharp, pointy hair.
    "Of course!!" Chi'Bi blurted.
    "I'm actually here to steal something," Lara said.  "It's a set of
clasps, silver in color.  Do you know where they are?"
    Chi'Bi concentrated.  Thinking was harder for him now that most of his
memory registers were occupied with Lara.
    "The elder.... yes!  I know!" Chi'Bi declared.  "They're the holy
relics the Lord of Chaos gave to our protection.  Chi'Leas keeps them in a
special cave off to the side of the temple."
    "What kind of security?"
    "It's locked and barred with iron, no guards.  But it doesn't matter.
Nobody can touch them, according to the scripture."
    "Nobody who isn't human," Lara explained.  "If you lead me to that room
tonight, I can bust down the door and take them."
    Whatever spell-without-magic Lara had on Chi'Bi, he proved to have at
least one limit.
    "Wait, wait... I can't help you," Chi'Bi said, simply.  "It would be
wrong.  I would be betraying Chaos and my people, and--"
    Lara got out of bed, and stretched for maximum impact.  "Okay.  I'm a
fair person.  I'll simply find some other guy who's stronger and more
willing to help me.  I'm sure he'd enjoy our little games as well..."
    Exactly the right lever to use.  Primitive jealousy over mate selection
flared in Chi'Bi's eyes.
    "You're mine," he weakly insisted.  Lara tried hard not to laugh.
"I'll help you get those things.  I'm strong enough!"
    "That you are," Lara smiled.  "Very strong.  And we'll have a bright
future together.  I think you'll actually like changing sides, the Mazoku
are much more powerful than you can possibly--"
    "MAZOKU!?!"
    Caaaareful... calculate words and postures, guide things where you want
them...
    "They're not so bad," Lara said, putting as much casual emphasis in her
voice as she could.  "They have SUCH fun.  Fun like you and I have.  And
they're more exciting than anything you can think of, even in your wildest
imagination.  I'll make sure you're rewarded for your trouble."
    Chi'Bi still had some doubt on his face.  This was going to be a hard
sell.
    "But for now," Lara continued, playing a trump card, "There's something
new I wanted to show you that we can try."
    Yes... she was definitely going to have to keep word of this from
getting back.  Stone wasn't all that comfortable, but the embarrassment
would be far worse.  Instead of worrying, she formed a plan of how to deal
with it... a plan she could execute any time she wanted, once Chi'Bi
stopped being useful.

                                   [()()]

    That night, she stole the clasps.
    Lara almost had to laugh and kick herself.  If she only knew where the
blasted things were, she could have stolen them herself a long time ago.
But Shaburanigdo's vision stopped at the doors of the city, and some kind
of guide was required.  Still, this was a lesson to be learned; why go
through all the bother of corrupting some guy she didn't even like to find
out the information when she could have simply beat it out of someone?
Very inefficient.  She'd have to endeavor to stop wanting to be so
Dramatic.  It never got him anywhere, either.
    Once the clasps were safely away, she felt Shaburanigdo touch her soul
again.
    "The next item is here," he said.
    Her mind reeled through a vast maze of caverns.  Perfect.  The next
item would only be a long hike through the underground to get to.  She
thought she recognized the final destination, but it was blurry and the
vision ended right when she reached it... no matter.  Her mind had the map
memorized to get there.
    Still, now on the lam from the city with the silvery glowing things in
a backpack, she had this guy to deal with.  He slowed down her progress
greatly, since now -- naturally!  Sheesh -- he wasn't even able to get to
sleep without his fix.  To get rid of him now might not be wise, though,
since who knew what kind of trouble they might hit along the way?  So, she
kept the fastest pace possible in all things, and moved right along.
    The journey still was taking an inordinate amount of time.  What's
more, at her last check-in with Beastmaster, it seemed that Luna and Lina
Inverse were onto her scam.  Of all the luck!  But Lara refused to worry.
It was about time she faced down those two, now with a legitimate reason to
scrag them back into the stone age... Lina especially.
    Days of boring travel passed.  Lara dropped all pretense of being this
shy, innocent girl and felt free to be as nasty to Chi'Bi as she actually
wanted to be... and annoyingly, he didn't seem to care, as long as she kept
him satisfied.  Eventually she just stopped talking to him completely.
    And days later, she had arrived at her destination.
    Instantly, she recognized why she felt like she had seen it before.
    They were now standing at the gates of Hell.

                                   [()()]

    Hell, named after its creator Hellmaster Phibrizo, was not a place
where you had fun.  It was a place where you had everything except fun, and
in vast amounts.
    The cavern kingdom could easily be entered, via the gaping maw of the
gates, which actually were tastefully decorated.  In a bit of mock humor,
someone had dropped a doormat in front of the entrance, reading 'Welcome to
our Happy Hell. Please wipe your feet.'
    "This place seems sociable," Chi'Bi commented.
    "Sure, they welcome anybody who wants to come in," Lara noted.  "The
trick is getting out again.  Nobody does, in fact.  There's only one
entrance, and there are no exits."
    "But.. isn't this door a way out too?" he asked, gesturing to the
simple looking wooden door.
    "Work with me here, Chi'Bi.  I know what I'm talking about," Lara
said.  "This is Hell, after all."
    "You mean... the place where dead souls go when they've been evil?!"
Chi'Bi asked, horrified.  He was picking up on emotions well; as long as
you didn't mind his total overreaction to everything.  "We're doomed!  We
can't go in there, the vicious demons will eat us!  I didn't do anything
bad enough to spend forever in Hell!"
    "You're wrong about one thing," Lara said, putting her hand on the
doorknob.  "This isn't where evil people go."
    "It's not?"
    "Nope.  It's where anybody who pisses off the Mazoku go," she said.
"Good, bad, neutral... nobody said it was fair.  The Mazoku don't do fair.
Now hold your breath."
    She twisted the knob, and opened the vortex, bracing for the rush...
    Lara and Chi'Bi were sucked into the front door of Hell like ping pong
balls into a tornado.  The door slammed shut behind them, doorknocker
clacking a few times from the inertia.

                                   [()()]

    Lara didn't remember the journey that took her here the first time she
visited, so many years ago.  All she remembered was opening the door she
was instructed to open, and waking in her cell, her new home...
    This time, she wasn't expected by anybody.  She simply snapped out of
the trance, touching down outside the main city of Hell.
    As usual, the decor was red.  Very, very red, with lots of black thrown
in for variety.  The ground was a red dirt, the rivers ran with glowing red
lava, and the roof of the cavern -- very visible, so nobody had any doubts
that they were in the underworld -- was red with lots of sharp stalactites
that threatened to crack off, fall, and impale you.  Which they did from
time to time.  (Lara grew used to the sound last time she was here, so that
wouldn't be a problem.)  In the distance, the screaming of whoever they
were working on at the time was readily apparent, magically enhanced so
that plenty of people could listen in.  Naturally, all the activity was
inside the gates of Hellhaven, the main city of Hell; it'd be too
unorganized to let the damned wander around outside its gates.  Besides,
the enclosed stone maze that separated the plains from the city was
something of an obstacle.
    Things hadn't changed much.
    Truth be told, a tiny pang of fear shot down Lara's back on arrival.
The last time she was here... fortunately, Shaburanigdo helped her forget
most of the last time she was here, when he freed her from the prison of
Hell.  But enough semblance of memory remained to be as nervous as a cat in
a dog factory.  Not that she would show it to anybody.
    Chi'Bi overreacted as usual.  "I want to leave!  I want to leave right
now!!"
    "Give it a rest," Lara said.  "This place isn't scary once you realize
it was designed to scare you.  It's just an evil looking city underground
and nothing more.  Obviously they're going to do their best to freak you
out, and frankly, they're not very original about it... there's only so
many ways to cause pain, you know, before you just get tired and
uninterested of it.  This place is about as frightening to me as navel
lint."
    "It's safe?" he asked.
    "The city is relatively safe.  It's the people in it you need to worry
about," Lara said.  "Stay behind me and hang on and if anything grabs you,
kick it.  If it doesn't let go, speak up and I'll make it let go.  But
otherwise, shut up and let me handle this place.  We clear?"
    "C-clear," Chi'Bi agreed.  "But.. why do we have to do this?"
    "I've explained this--"
    "We could just go back," Chi'Bi said.  "Forget this quest.  I could go
home!  It's not so bad there.  I mean, what's so imp--"
    Lara backhanded him casually, sending the boy sprawling.
    "Don't question this quest again, okay?" she politely requested.
"Because I don't have time to deal with stupid questions.  Father wants it
done.  I AM father's will.  Even if it means diving headfirst back into a
Hell I intended never to return to... besides, I told you to shut up and
let me handle this, and if you say one more word, I might consider leaving
you here.  Now... are we clear this time?"
    Chi'Bi almost said 'clear', but considering his orders, returned a
shaky nod instead.
    "The road leading up the city usually takes two years to follow," Lara
stated, focusing her magic.  "I'd prefer to get this mission over with
sooner than that.  We're taking a shortcut.  Cover your eyes."

                                   [()()]

    Two standard issue Hellfiend Mazoku were on guard duty at the gate, to
taunt the damned souls that filtered down here through Hellhaven's gate
maze.  Things had been slow lately... with two of the Mazoku Lords out of
commission, including the master of this domain, few folks were being
damned.  All the better; it gave them more time to play poker.
    "I'll see your fingerbone and raise you a toe," the First of the Guard
said, adding to the pot, which doubled as lunch for later.  "Call."
    "Four of a kind, all knights," his companion grinned, razor sharp teeth
gleaming.  "And you?"
    "Crap," the First grumbled, tossing down his cards.  "You're cheating,
aren't you?"
    "Yeah.  You wanna make something of it?"
    "Maybe after lunch," the First shrugged.  "I'm too hungry."
    A low but powerful rumble shook the card table, sending 'chips'
toppling.  The rickety, ancient thing finally came to a painful demise, one
of the rusted iron legs buckling, dumping the soup on the floor.
    The Guards were up in a flash.  "What the--"
    A nearby part of the stone maze shattered into fine powder, the powder
blasted away by a wind spell.  Through this nice circular door stepped a
black sorceress.
    "I hate it when the damned get cocky," the Guard spat.  "You know how
hard it is to fix that stupid maze after one of them decides to get
impatient?  You'll pay for those damages eventually, morta--"
    His head exploded.
    "I'm not here looking for a residence, I'm here on business," Lara
said, pointing a smoking hand at the second guard.  "Problem?"
    "No ma'am," he said quickly.
    "Who's running this place now that Phibrizo got fried?"
    "F-Fiori, ma'am."
    "Don't know her.  Don't care that I don't know her.  Make sure she
knows I need an escorted ride in to see her, and if you leave me waiting
more than ten minutes for it, I'd suggest just killing yourself and saving
me the trouble of cutting bits off over the span of several days."
    "But--"
    "I could start with your butt, if that's what you want," Lara
suggested.
    The demon ran as fast as it possibly could, darting inside the city
gates.
    Lara, satisfied with her task, kicked one of the folding chairs to the
side so she'd have a good vantage of all entrances to the area.  She gave
her legs a well deserved rest... and looked at the pensive chimera.
    "Fine, talk," she allowed.
    "You're... jeez!  You're BRAVE!" he said, in visible awe.  "That you
could stand up like that... and what a cool threat!  It--"
    "Was wholly unoriginal, and overly Dramatic," Lara said.  "But that's
the only garbage that works against these people.  I know them inside and
out, and if I just told them to go get the headmistress of Hell, they'd
laugh and taunt and we'd be sitting here for hours playing Hero and Bad
Guy.  If you just cut to the punchline things go faster.  Please don't
confuse what I just did with clever wit.  Unless you mean clever
application of pseudo-wit."
    Chi'Bi wasn't quite able to understand her, but nodded along anyway.
    Lara allowed herself a sigh, a visible sign of annoyance.  "Sometimes I
wish father's minions were smarter.  Closest one to intelligent I've seen
is Zelas-Metallum and her ex-crony, but that's not enough.  If all of them
had more brains, maybe they'd have destroyed the world properly by now.
Lord, I hate the Mazoku."

                                   [()()]

    Phibrizo's throne room was the only part of Hell that Lara had noticed
changes to.
    For starters, it was loaded with randomly scattered toys.  There were
building blocks a plenty with unholy sigils and numbers carved on them,
lots of books, more plush dolls with tentacles and  claws than the law
should allow... and the throne itself had been decorated to death with red
ribbons and sparkly glitter.
    As had the headmistress of Hell, Princess Fiori.
    "Golly gee!" Fiori smiled, radiating cuteness and innocence like an
aura.  "If I had known the Knight of Shaburanigdo was here, I'd have set up
a parade!  We could make the damned drag huge floats of the demon king, and
there'd be ticker tape and ice cream and cookies!  And everybody would have
a good time inside entertainment."
    "What a shame," Lara said dryly.
    But to be honest?  She wasn't surprised.  Phibrizo often took the guise
of a child, and certainly spoke like one.  Why not leave one in charge of
the works when he left?  Although she was confused as to how this would be
an adequate source of pain and nightmares...
    She was short, with golden curls and trusting blue eyes.  Her pretty
red dress had nary a wrinkle in it, and her little red shoes were nice and
shiny.  The only things keeping her from looking just like some irritating
human moppet were her slitted Mazoku eyes, and the plushie demon king doll
she carried around.
    "Don't worry, Lara-chan!  We'll have fun anyway, even if we don't have
a parade.  I'll--"
    "I don't have time for a parade or any kind of fun," Lara interrupted.
"I'm looking for a chain made out of silver, which is somewhere in your
kingdom.  No Mazoku can touch it without being burned, so it shouldn't be
lost.  Where can I find the place where it rests?"
    Fiori paused, not liking the interruption, waiting for Lara to finish.
Waiting a few moments, she continued herself.  "I'll just arrange a little
fun while we talk it over, and maybe you can stay and we'll have a lot
of--"
    "No fun!" Lara said.  "I'm on an important mission here."
    The little girl started turning red, like her dress.  She hopped off
the throne, and stamped her foot.  "I WANT TO HAVE FUN!  I don't care about
your stupid mission!  I won't help you until I get entertained and that's
that, you stupid little human!  You keep being mean and I'll cry and then
you'll be really, really sorry!!"
    Lara didn't back down.  Shaburanigdo gave her power before to deal with
Phibrizo and Gaav; now that he was back, he'd help her here in a pinch.
But it was still better not to screw around, no matter how much she
preferred the direct approach.
    "Fine... fun.  Fun's good.  A little fun, okay?" she asked.
    Fiori's mood skyrocketed back to manic cheer.  "YAAAAY!  Fun!"  She
clapped her hands twice.  "Bring out the entertainment!!"
    Lara quickly learned why Fiori was just right for her job.
    The little girl, despite her harmless looks, was a pure sadist.  True,
she did it in a childlike innocent way, gleefully dropping rats into cages
around the heads of the damned or hopping over close to examine what a burn
looked like, but make no mistake -- she had the tried and true methods of
torture and general nastiness down.
    "Aren't these fun games and toys?" Fiori asked, twisting the handle on
one of the contraptions she had hauled out.  "Here, you take that end and
I'll take this one!  It works better from two directions!"
    Lara played along at first, but after three hours went by (Chi'Bi
passed out from fright and nausea early on) she began to theorize that the
little girl could be entertained for days at a time without sleep.
Something was going to have to give.
    "Look, Fiori..." Lara reasoned, trying to talk over the sound of the
people Fiori just had shipped into the throne room.  "I'd love to come back
and play more, but you know, Shaburanigdo has this quest for me... very
important.  Shaburanigdo.  You know, like your dolly?"
    "Shabby-chan is my friend," Fiori giggled.
    "Riiight.  Anyway, I really need that chain, so if you could--"
    "It's under my throne," Fiori said, pointing to the large cute chair.
"Phibrizo-sama had the chair built over it because he thought the thing was
important, but we never figured out why it was.  You can have it, I don't
think it's very fun."
    Lara kicked herself for not casing the room earlier.  She walked behind
the throne, and squinted into the dark recesses underneath the bloody
thing... and sure enough, there was a faintly glowing silver length of
chain, just sitting there.  Probably had been sitting there for thousands
of years, too.
    She grabbed it without a thought and stuffed the thing into a pocket on
her cloak.
    "Thanks," Lara thanked.  "I'll just pick up my chimera and head off.
Sorry to be a bother."
    Fiori fidgeted from foot to foot, barely able to contain a happy
surprise.  Smiles coated her.
    "Oooooooh, I don't know..." she said, teasing.  "What makes you think
I'll let you head off?"
    Lara's eyes narrowed, but she let the girl speak.
    "You escaped from my big brother Phibrizo once and that made him very
unhappy," Fiori accused, still grinning.  "You hurt him and he was really,
really unhappy then.  You're one of the only mortals to ever, ever escape
Hell.  So why should I let you go, when I've got you now?  The only way to
leave this place is with the blessing of its owner, and you won't twist my
arm like you did big brother's.  I wanna finish playing with you like he
did.  He said you were fuuunn..."
    Lara had had enough by this point.
    "I'm the daughter of Shaburanigdo, you pint sized glass of sugary
stupidity," Lara said flatly.  "You think threats scare me?  He's your lord
and master, and he's not going to put up with you treating me like this.
That's why he busted me out of here in the first place.  He cares for HIS
daughter and won't let her get hurt."
    "I don't believe in Shaburanigdo," Fiori said simply.  She gave her
dolly another hug.  "Shaburanigdo is dead and he can't do anything for the
Mazoku.  But I believe in Shabby-chan.  Shabby-chan is real and alive and
my Shabby-chan says it's time to play with you.  Guards?"
    Hellspawn started to flow into the room, thick as thieves.
    No more playing, Lara thought, and tapped the power of Shaburanigdo
directly, as she had done years before......
    ...and found nothing there.  He wasn't present in the world, not in the
place she remembered him being.  But that was THE place... he couldn't
move, he was there for her before!  Where was father now?  He helped her
against Zelas-Metallum!!  Why wasn't he helping her escape Hell again?
    Lara was powerful, but not powerful enough to bust out of Hell on her
own.
    "I'm going to have a lot of fun," Fiori said.  And meant it.
    But Lara Inverse wasn't in terror.  She was calculating.  Anything it
took, she'd do.  Without fear of being struck down, moving with confidence
enough to fool anybody for the right number of seconds, she reached out and
yanked the Shabby-chan dolly away from Fiori.
    The reaction was instant.  The little girl's eyes went wide with
horror, as Lara grabbed two limbs of the doll and threatened to tear it
apart.
    "We're leaving," Lara reiterated.  "Me and Chi'Bi.  Or Shabby-chan gets
it."
    She quickly cast a spell to revive the chimera and kicked him awake; a
few dark looks got the boy to keep behind her as he had promised.  Lara
slowly, very slowly, backed out of the throne room, keeping the doll
hostage.
    The seas of demons parted for her, all the way to the gate of Hell,
which Fiori opened for her.  Lara tossed the doll behind her and closed the
door fast... escaped again.

                                   [()()]

    The pair marched along the caves dejectedly, as they had for the last
two days.  Lara refused to say much of anything, except order Chi'Bi to
help her get to the surface.  She never let on that she didn't know where
she was going.
    Her father didn't return to guide her.  He didn't help her against
Hell.  Something was wrong.  But Lara tried not to care... she was her
father's will, and eventually, he would guide her.  He would.
    "Where are we going?" Chi'Bi finally asked.
    "Shut up and walk," Lara ordered.
    It was a quest that took her almost a decade so far, but she'd please
her father in the end.  The end of everything wasn't far away, and Lara
fully intended to be there, laughing at the daughters that distracted her
father away... laughing, while she burned the world.  That was a thought
that kept her confident, despite the silence of the demon king.
    It would only be a matter of time now.  Then, she'd be happy.
    Finally.

                                  2b Continued