Subject: [FFML] [ff][PSME] Rin's Story: Part One (repost?)
From: Krista Perry <1perrykr@mystic.slcc.edu>
Date: 4/28/1998, 9:39 PM
To: ffml@fanfic.com
Reply-to:
1perrykr@mystic.slcc.edu

Okay, I'm resubbed, re-employed (Yay!), re-writing... er, yeah. 
Everything's getting better!  If I were any better, I'd be twins!

However... if this fic doesn't make it to the list this time, I may put
my fist through the computer screen.  ^_^

Hi all! ^_^

Okay, this is another slight detour from my "Hearts of Ice" fic
(over 700 pages and counting!  Aughh!), but I had to get this out
of my system.  Please read it and let me know what you think.

Oh, and for those who are interested, HoI Part 20 is coming along
nicely, if a bit slowly, simply because the big finale has been a 
bit emotionally draining to write.  And, after nearly two years
of waiting to get up to this point, I wanna get it *just right.* 
Sorry for the delay. ^_^;

By the way, if this PSME story looks familiar, it's because I
posted this a couple of weeks ago under another email address,
since my school account was down, and didn't get much of a
response, so here I go again.  Hope I'm not annoying anyone.  If
so, gomen nasai.

Anyway, you don't have to be familiar with "Please Save My Earth"
to read this fic, though it would definitely add to your reading
enjoyment.  This story is basically a novelization, following the
events in the first OAV episode, and the first volume of manga,
incorporating aspects of both, and is the melded result of what
my twisted imagination can come up with when left without
supervision.  But after watching the series and going through the
manga, I couldn't help but wonder... What *exactly* was going on
in poor Rin's mind?  What would the story be like... told through
his eyes?

Okay, enough babbling.  ^_^

Disclaimer: "Please Save My Earth" is the creation and property
of Saki Hiwatari.

**Warning: Major spoilers ahead.  But I hope you read anyway.**

*****
Please Save My Earth
Rin's Story: Part One
by Krista Perry

*****

~*~
And They Call it Puppy Love...
~*~

     Alice was strange, Rin thought broodingly, as he ran the
wheels of his yellow-striped purple race car along the edge of
his bed.  She was strange, and *that's* why he felt so weird
whenever he was around her.

     Ever since that first time he saw her, when she and her
family were moving into the apartment next door, it seemed that
she made him do the oddest things.  A loud thump followed by an
exclamation of dismay had roused him from his after-school dose
of cartoons.  He had peeked out into the hall to see what was
going on, and there she was.  Tall (though not quite so tall as
Mama) and fragile, struggling with a heavy suitcase that had
sprung open and spilled its contents across the hallway floor. 
Her long brown hair was damp from her exertions, and strands of
it clung to her face.

     He didn't say a word, but she must have felt his eyes on
her, for she looked up, and their eyes locked.  At that moment,
he seemed frozen, unable to breathe, or even think.

     And then, her face lit up, and she smiled a greeting that
shook him to the core.

     Since then, he couldn't seem to get the stupid lady, with
the strange name of Alice, out of his head.  Alice.  What kind of
stupid name was that?

     It was annoying.  He had even gotten in trouble at school
because of it, when the teacher had caught him doodling a stick
figure with long hair on his math paper.  But who cared? 
Additions and subtractions were boring anyway.  He couldn't wait
to move up to the 2nd grade, where the older kids were at least
being taught multiplication tables, and not the baby stuff he had
to do now.

     Alice was so gullible.  He loved to tease her, she was so
easy to trick.  She was even more gullible than the
kindergartners, and she was a high school freshman.  He didn't
think anyone was stupid enough to fall for that "open your mouth
and close your eyes" trick.  But she had.  Oh, the look on her
face, when he spit his chewed gum into her mouth!

     The look on her face...

     He had heard Mama's voice calling him home for dinner then,
and he had gratefully run away, laughing and twirling his
gymnastics ribbon as Alice stood in silent shock with tears in
her eyes.

     He had felt so bad afterwards.  It was disconcerting; he
wasn't even sure why he should feel so awful over such a little
trick.  He had done it to his friends, and they didn't cry, and
he didn't cry when his friends had done it to *him,* after all. 
And he was only seven.  She was old, already sixteen.  Why should
*she* cry?

     The next day, when he saw Alice, he offered her a stick of
gum.  But she thought he was trying to trick her again, and she 
ignored him.  When he insisted that it was real this time, she
jerked away, knocking it out of his hand.

     He cried, then.  Staring silently at the stick of gum on the
pavement, he felt the tears welling up in his eyes, against his
will...

     Stupid, stupid.  Why would he cry over that, over her
refusal of his gift, when he didn't cry over anything else?  His
feelings twisted and churned in his chest, and it was so
confusing and so painful, so he stomped his feet and screamed
until Alice apologized in a humbled panic.  She even took him to
the store after that, and bought him some gum, anxious to make
amends for his wounded feelings.

     He chewed it, and stuck it in the back of her long brown
hair when she wasn't looking.  Stupid Alice.  Stupid lady, he
hated her.

     "Rin, dear."

     Startled, Rin looked up from his race car, which, he
realized, he'd been staring at blankly. How long had he been
sitting there, frozen in thought?

     Mama was standing in his bedroom doorway.  She smiled at
him.  "Just so you know, Daddy and I are going out tomorrow," she
said.  "We got a babysitter to stay with you for the day."

     Rin sat back on his haunches and peered at Mama through his
long, parted bangs.  "Who did you get?"

     "Mrs. Yamaguchi, from the 4th floor.  You remember her,
don't you?"

     Rin's expression immediately crinkled in distaste.  "I don't
like her.  She's boring.  All she does is watch TV."

     Mama frowned.  "Well, honey, I'm afraid I can't find anyone
else on such short notice.  It's the weekend, and everyone has
already made plans."

     "What about Alice?"  The question was out of his mouth
before he realized it.

     His mother blinked.  "Alice?  You mean the Sakaguchi girl
from next door?  But I thought you didn't like her."

     He had no answer to that, and so he remained silent, glaring
at Mama as he felt an unsettling heat rise to his face.

     Sudden understanding dawned in the woman's eyes as she gazed
at her scowling son, and a smile turned up the corners of her
mouth, which she tried in vain to suppress as Rin's scowl
deepened.  "Ah... I see... Well then," she said, unable to hide
the amusement in her voice.  "I'll go right over and ask if she's
available."

     Rin climbed onto his bed and affected disinterest as he
abruptly became overly fascinated with the wheels of his purple
race car.


~*~
Adventures in Babysitting
~*~

     "Alice, it's so good of you to do this on such short
notice."

     Rin silently looked up at Alice, who was doing her best to
avoid his gaze as she looked right into Mama's face.  "I... I'm
glad I could be of help, Mrs. Koboyashi."

     "Now, here's the number we'll be at if there's an
emergency."

     "Okay..."

     "And you're welcome to help yourself to anything in the
refrigerator.  There are plenty of leftovers from last night's
dinner that you and Rin can have."

     "Thanks..."

     "Is there anything I'm forgetting?  Oh yes, Rin's bedtime is
8:00, but if he eats all his food, you can let him stay up an
extra half hour."

     "Alright..."

     Mama sighed happily.  "Well, I guess that's it then."  She
leaned over and kissed Rin on the top of his head.  "You be good
for Alice, okay?"

     Rin gave Mama a thin-lipped smile, and held up two fingers
in the "peace" sign.

     "I'll see you later then.  Bye!"

     "Have a good time, Mrs. Koboyashi."

     Mama closed the door behind her.  Rin listened to her
footsteps as she walked away down the long hall.

     He turned to face Alice.  She was looking down at him with
no small amount of apprehension.  Then, hesitantly, she opened
her mouth as if she wanted to say something.

     Rin took that as his cue, and, pursing his lips, he spit out
the mouthful of water that he'd been carefully holding in his
cheeks since before she came.  Alice shrieked as she suddenly
found herself wet and dripping.

     "Rin!  You... you..."  She wiped at her face, looking as if
she wasn't sure whether to be angry, or burst into tears.

     She looked so flustered and pathetic.  It was too funny, and
Rin burst out laughing.

     "You... you little brat!"

     Uh-oh.  Rin choked off his laughter as he saw Alice's hurt
expression flare into fury, her fists clenching at her sides. 
Time to make a quick escape.  He took off running, with Alice
right on his heels.

     "Come back here, Rin!"

     "No way!"  He dodged around the coffee table, using the
piece of furniture as an obstacle between him and his teenage
nemesis.  "You can't make me!  You're not my mother!"  She chased
him around the table a few times before they both stood at an
impasse, each on opposite ends.

     Alice glared at him, her face flushed, her hands flat on the
table.  "Rin, did you deliberately put gum in my hair yesterday?"
she demanded.

     He smirked, ignoring the sudden tightening of his chest. 
She deserved it, after all.  "Yeah, so what?"

     Alice's face went livid.  "Ohhh!"  She looked like she was
about ready to climb over the table to get him, so he feinted to
the left, and when she moved, he ducked off to the right, running
down the hall to his room.  He would slam the door in her face,
and put his foot against the base of the door so she couldn't--

     "Gak!"  He felt himself jerked backwards as Alice grabbed
the collar of his sweater and swiftly looped her arms under his
from behind, pinning him so that he couldn't escape.  

     "Let me go!  Let me GO!" he yelled.

     "Not until you promise to behave," she snapped back.

     Only one thing to do, then.  Yelling his head off, he
thrashed and kicked his legs violently, trying to break free. 
"Let go let go let GO!" he screeched.  But it was no use.  He
felt Alice pull him off the floor, with difficulty, since it only
made it easier for him to thrash around with his feet off the
ground.  Slowly, painfully, she hauled him back down the hallway
and into the living room.

     "Ugh.  Hold still, Rin!"

     "Cruelty!" Rin shouted.  "Child abuse!"

     "Now wait just a min--"

     "Let me go right now, or I'm gonna tell everyone that you're
not a VIRGIN!"

     Alice dropped him to the floor.  He immediately scooted away
and turned to face her, then blinked, surprised at the effect his
words had made.

     Alice's flushed face had gone pale, and she pointed at him
with a shaking finger.  

     He blinked again.  He hadn't realized that 'virgin' was such
a powerful word.

     "H... how..." Alice stammered.  "It... it's too early for
you to..."

     "Too early?!"  Rin snorted.  "It's already 11:00!"

     Confusion and dismay flickered in Alice's eyes.  "But...
no... what you said... do you even know what that word means?"

     Rin glared at her indignantly.  "Of course I do!  My mom
said all nice young ladies are virgins.  My mom is a wonderful
virgin, but you're not a virgin at all!"  He had hoped this would
have the same effect as his original accusation, but for some
reason, Alice looked relieved.

     He wasn't sure what was wrong with what he'd said, but he
had obviously lost his gained advantage.  He scowled as he
frantically tried to think of something else to--

     Something made a strange noise behind him.  Looking over his
shoulder, he saw that a cat had somehow made its way into the
apartment, through the open patio door, and was now looking up at
him inquisitively.  It meowed again.

     Rin let out a startled squawk, jumped up, and ran over to
hide behind Alice's legs.

     "Rin," Alice protested as he clung to her jeans.  But,
looking over her shoulder, she saw the look on his face.  "Rin? 
What's wrong?"  Her voice lost its irritation, and was once again
gentle, and even worried as she saw the sudden fear in his
expression.

     He was trembling.  He was frightened of the small animal,
and he didn't know why.  It didn't make any sense.  He'd seen
lots of pictures of cats before, and he'd seen them on TV, but
they didn't seem scary then.  The cat came towards them, and he
gasped and clung to Alice's legs.

     "Oh, it's just a cute kitty," said Alice, bending down to
stroke the animal.  It arched its back in pleasure at her touch,
and began to purr.  "See?  It's nothing to be afraid of."

     Rin eyed it skeptically for a moment, tensed with
apprehension.  The cat walked back and forth, rubbing its head
against Alice's outstretched hand, purring loudly.

     It *seemed* safe enough.  Cautiously, Rin edged out from
behind Alice to peer at the cat.  "It won't bite, will it?" he
asked.

     "Oh no.  She's a good cat.  She won't bite you."

     "How do you know?"

     Alice looked at him, perplexed, yet obviously pleased that
the appearance of the cat had effectively tamed her monstrous
young charge.  "I just...  Look, she just won't.  Here, why don't
you try petting her?"

     Rin paled.  "I... I don't know."  There was something about
the cat.  Something that made him feel... weird.

     Almost the same way that Alice made him feel weird.  He
didn't like it.

     A few minutes later, as the cat sat lapping up a bowl of
milk that Alice had set out for it, he edged towards the animal
with an outstretched hand.  Carefully, he stroked the top of the
cat's head with two fingers.  The cat paid him no heed, and
simply continued to lap up the milk.

     "See?  That's wasn't so scary, was it?"  Alice smiled.

     "I...  I guess."  He stroked the cat's head again, this
time, with his whole hand.  "I've never really been around
animals before."

     "Really?"  Alice sounded shocked.

     Rin nodded.  "But... there's something..."

     "What?"

     He frowned, his eyes growing cloudy and distant.  "I don't
know.  It's just... it makes me feel weird."

     His eyes cleared to see Alice leaning over him closely, with
a broad smile on her face.  "Hey," he said, jerking away.  "Quit
it!"

     But she just smiled delightedly.  "I have an idea," she
said.  "Let's take a trip... to the zoo!"

     Rin blinked, surprised, flustered, and a little afraid.  The
zoo?  Alice wanted to take him to the zoo?  With all the animals?

     He'd never been to a zoo before...

     "Fine," he said sharply.


~*~
Animal Magnetism
~*~

     The animals were staring at them.  *All* of the animals. 
Wherever they went, it seemed, whether they were at the polar
bear exhibit, or the monkeys, or the giraffes or the elephants... 
All the animals stopped what they were doing, and gathered
together... to stare at them.

     It was weird.

     "Why are they doing that?" Rin asked, leaning on the railing
at the penguin exhibit.  The penguins were all clustered at the
furthest tip of an overhanging rock -- the closest they could
come to their human observers.

     "Because they're curious about you," Alice answered, matter-
of-factly.  "They're doing it for your benefit."

     Rin looked back at her in surprise.  "You mean, you can talk
to them?"

     Alice blushed suddenly.  "Well... not exactly.  It's more
that I... can sense what they're feeling.  It's been like this
for me ever since I was a little girl."

     Rin looked up at her skeptically.  "Really?  You're not just
saying that, trying to fool a little kid, are you?"

     "No!"  Alice flushed further, and looked as if she regretted
saying anything at all.  "I... I've just always had a feel for
these kind of things."

     "Oh."  Rin's brow furrowed.  "Are they really curious about
me?  Or are they coming to see you?"

     Alice looked at him for a moment, as if unsure what to say. 
"Maybe... they're coming to see both of us," she said.

     "Mm."  Rin doubted it, as he looked at the cluster of
Emperor penguins.  Their black eyes, framed in silky-smooth black
feathers and bright streaks of scarlet on either side, stared up
and past him to the girl standing behind him.

     Yup, that clinched it.  Alice was weirder than he thought.

     But... it was a nice kind of weird, he decided.  He had had
fun today, a lot of fun.  It was nice being with Alice as she
took him around to all the different places.  He liked it.  He
felt good with her.  *Weird* good... but good just the same.

     As they started back to catch the train, Alice paused by a
small vendor's stand.  "Oh look," she said.  "Crocus bulbs!"

     Rin looked into the wooden crates.  There was nothing there
but a bunch of dusty brown roots.  He wrinkled his nose.  "What's
the big deal?" he asked.

     Alice picked one up and held it carefully.  "Crocus bulbs,"
she said softly, as if confiding a wonderful secret, "grow into
beautiful flowers."

     Rin's eyes widened.  "Really?"

     Alice leaned down and looked him in the eye, smiling. 
"Would you like me to get you one?"

     It was happening again.  That weird feeling, stronger than
ever, as he looked into her eyes.  That strange thumping of his
heart, and the tickling in the back of his skull, as if something
was under water, and trying to break through to the surface.

     He nodded.  "Uh-huh."  

     "You'll have to take good care of it."

     "I will."  He picked up one of the bulbs and held it
carefully in both hands.  "Will it be pretty?" he asked softly.

     Alice laughed, and affectionately smoothed his hair with her
hand.  "Yes, it will be very pretty."

     As they continued on their way to the train station, he held
Alice's hand.  He felt good, and happy, and warm in spite of the
chill spring air.  Somewhere along the way, he realized that he
was smiling from ear to ear.

     Maybe he didn't hate Alice after all.


~*~
Ice Cream and Moon Dreams
~*~

     "Anyway, Alice... Issei and I wanted you to know... We're
not gay."

     Alice gave a little gasp, and Rin looked up briefly from his
ice cream to stare at the two young men sitting across from him
and Alice in the cafe.

     At first, he had been irritated when these two strangers, a
red-headed guy named Jinpachi, and his quiet friend Issei, had
stopped him and Alice on the way to the train station  
especially since Alice seemed so reluctant to talk to them.  In
fact, she had tried to pull him away from the pair, as if she was
anxious to leave.  Rin had been more than happy to oblige, not
wanting to get caught up in the middle of a boring adult
conversation.  But then Jinpachi had offered to treat him and
Alice to some ice cream, in return for a chance to explain. 
Explain what, Rin didn't know and didn't care.  But he figured
that, with ice cream in the bargain, as long as the conversation
didn't last too long, he could tolerate it in silence for the
time being.

     He didn't understand what they were talking about anyway. 
Maybe it was more interesting than he thought, because both Alice
and the Jinpachi guy were blushing.  He listened with half an ear
to the conversation, his greater attention focused on spooning
the sweet chocolate coldness into his mouth.

     "When you saw us," said the young man named Issei, "you
overheard the middle of our strange conversation, and didn't get
the full picture."

     "Did I misunderstand then?" Alice said hesitantly.  "I... I
really didn't mean to eavesdrop.  I was just looking at the
flowers behind the school, and I overheard...  Well, you said
that the night before, you and he..."  She trailed off in
embarrassment, her cheeks glowing pink.

     Issei smiled sheepishly.  Jinpachi groaned and ran his hands
through his unruly hair.  "It's not that at *all,*" he said. 
"Man, how do I explain this without sounding crazy?"

     "Tell her about the dreams," Issei suggested.

     Alice blinked.  "Dreams?"

     Jinpachi sighed.  "It's like this, Alice.  For a while now,
Issei and I have been having identical dreams.  It's hard to
explain, but... it's as though we're characters in someone else's
memories.  In our dreams, I'm always a guy named Gyokulan."

     "And for me," said Issei, "the dreams were particularly
disturbing, because...  Well, it seems that I'm a woman, named
Enju.  What's more, Enju and Gyokulan seem to be..."  He coughed
delicately.  "Er... lovers."

     Alice's eyes went wide, and she let out a little, nervous
laugh.

     Jinpachi reddened further.  "This must sound completely
crazy to you."

     "No," Alice said hastily.  She smiled tentatively. 
"Actually, it's fascinating.  In fact, I'd like to hear more
about these dreams."

     Rin paused in shoveling the ice cream into his mouth.  She
wanted to hear more?  This didn't bode well for a short
conversation.  He looked over at Jinpachi.  The tousle-haired
young man's face had lit up at the sight of Alice's smile.

     Rin felt something inside him twitch unpleasantly. 
Frowning, he looked down and slowly lifted another spoonful of
ice cream to his mouth.

     "You see," said Jinpachi, "Issei and I were in the same home
room during the last two years of junior high.  Sometimes we'd
talk about our dreams."  He grimaced slightly.  "Even then, they
were pretty wacky.  So here we are, freshman year in high school,
and we're still having weird dreams.  But when we started taking
them seriously, something happened.  We started remembering
details, people and conversations, like we were awake.

     Alice shook her head in amazement.  "That... certainly is
unusual."

     Jinpachi snorted.  "You don't know the half of it."

     "Hm?"

     "What he means," said Issei, "is that all of these dreams
take place on the moon."

     *The moon...*

     Rin looked up from his ice cream.  His dish was nearly
empty, and, against his will, he felt himself being drawn into
this strange conversation.  The whole situation was starting to
make him feel all weird inside again.  He looked over at Alice to
see her reaction Issei's claim.  She seemed quite engrossed in
the story.

     "The... moon?" she asked.

     "Yes.  We live there in some kind of base or research
station, as part of a group of seven scientists.  I'm the one
called Enju, and Jinpachi is Gyokulan.  The seven of us are
involved in some kind of work observing the Earth.  We gather
data of the world's nations, people, politics... you name it. 
Each scientist is qualified in one way or another, to contribute
to the team.  In fact, Enju is an anthropologist."  Issei lowered
his voice uneasily.  "That's another thing that's so weird about
this whole thing.  I've never studied anthropology in my life. 
But I *know* it.  The knowledge is there, inside my head, and I
haven't done a thing to acquire it.  Other than have these
dreams, that is."

     "The same with me," said Jinpachi.  "Gyokulan's a top
archeologist.  And I find myself knowing things, understanding
things about archeology that I *shouldn't* know, because I've
never really learned about it."

     "Oh."  Alice lapsed into amazed silence.  "What of the
others?" she asked.  "You said there were seven scientists?"

     "That's right," said Jinpachi.  "Aside from Gyokulan and
Enju..."  A wistful smile suddenly lit his face.  "Well, there's
Mokulen.  She's the biologist.  She's... wow, well, she's
beautiful and mysterious... and brilliant.  And she has a way
with plants that you would not believe."

     Rin fidgeted in his seat, a small scowl settling across his
brow.  He was through with his ice cream.  And he didn't like the
way this conversation was going.  Most of it didn't even make any
sense.  He just didn't like the feel of it... but even more, he
especially didn't like the way Jinpachi was looking at Alice.

     On top of that, he didn't feel very good.  That strange
feeling was back, tickling the base of his skull, making his head
ache.

     "Really?" said Alice.

     "Yeah." Jinpachi's expression became thoughtful.  "And then
there's Shion.  He's an engineering genius.  He's a strange one,
though, kind of the dark and brooding type.  Believe it or not, I
get the impression that he and Gyokulan are good friends.  Like
they knew each other as kids.  But Shion was a trouble-making
kid, a near delinquent.  Even now, his morals are a little
questionable."

     "You're making him sound worse than he is," interrupted
Issei.  "After all, he has a strong sense of justice.  And he has
the tendency to take things at face value."

     "Yeah, but his temper--"

     "Isn't as bad as Shusulan's."

     "Amazing," Alice breathed.  "It's as if you really know
these people."

     Jinpachi looked at Alice and smiled.  "Yeah.  I know it
sounds weird, but we do.  Then there's--"

     *Shukaido*  The strange word flitted through Rin's mind.  He
blinked, and rubbed one eye with the heel of his hand.

     "--Shukaido, the physician.  He's the real quiet type.  And
Hiragi, he's a linguist, and the team leader.  And Shusulan.  Hm. 
I can't remember what her job was, but I think she is friends
with Enju."

     "She is," said Issei.  "And she's the physical sciences
expert."

     "And you learned all this from your dreams?"

     "That's right."

     Rin's head hurt.  He stuck his empty spoon in his mouth and
sucked on it, his chin resting against his free hand.  His half-
lidded glare went unnoticed by the others at the table.

     Alice shook her head, smiling.  "It's incredible."

     Jinpachi and Issei cast startled looks at each other. 
Jinpachi leaned towards Alice eagerly.  "Do you believe us then?"

     "Well..." Alice shifted uncomfortably.  "It *is* pretty far-
fetched.  But... I don't know.  Something about it seems...
right, I guess."

     "What a relief!" Jinpachi exclaimed, and Alice blinked,
startled.  "Wow, I just couldn't stand the thought of you
thinking I was... you know, gay or whatever."

     "Oh."  Alice smiled shyly.  "Well then, I guess you can rest
easy now."

     Rin had had enough.  He was tired, his ice cream was gone,
and the conversation had gone on much too long.  Worse than that,
the weird, aching feeling was stronger than ever, sparking every
time he looked up at Jinpachi and saw the strange glint in the
young man's eyes that seemed directed at Alice.

     Rin wasn't stupid.  He watched television, he saw the shows
that Mama watched, and he knew mushy stuff when he saw it. 
Feeling irrationally angry, he reached over and tugged on Alice's
sleeve.  "I'm bored," he announced loudly.  "I wanna go home!"

     "You know, it's weird," Jinpachi said, looking at Alice as
if Rin hadn't spoken.  "But I've had this feeling, since the day
I first saw you at school, that we've met somewhere before."

     Rin felt a strange heat build up behind his eyes.  But
before he could do or say anything, Issei spoke up.

     "Oh please," he said.  "That's the oldest pick-up line in
the book."

     Jinpachi turned on his friend, flushing with embarrassment. 
"That's not what I meant!"  He scowled.  "Maybe you are gay."

     Issei's mouth opened in shock.  "Hey!  What kind of thing is
that to say?"

     Jinpachi immediately looked shamefaced.  He glanced over at
Alice, who was blushing profusely, then back at his friend. 
"I...   I'm Sorry, Issei.  I spoke before I thought."

     "As usual."  Issei looked decidedly unhappy.

     Rin clenched his teeth and pulled on Alice's sleeve again
impatiently.  "Alice, let's go home!"

     "Okay, Rin," she replied, still looking a bit flustered. 
She stood and gave a little bow towards the young men.  "Thank
you for the ice cream... and the explanation."

     "Uh... no problem."  Jinpachi had his hand behind his head
in embarrassment.  "Thanks for the chance to explain."

     

~*~
Fall From Grace
~*~

     "Rin, it's almost your bedtime," Alice called from the
kitchen.  "Time to get in your pyjamas."

     Rin sat on the edge of the couch and kicked off his shoes. 
One of them hit the far wall and left a mark.

     "Rin?  No roughhousing, okay?"

     He felt like he wanted to cry.  Like he wanted to hit
something.  His eyes burned, and his throat was full of bitter
heat.  The horrible aching sensation, that had finally vanished
during his afternoon excursion with Alice by his side, had
returned to haunt him with a vengeance, eating away at his
insides.  And he didn't even fully understand why.  He only knew
that he hated feeling that way.  He hated it, and he wanted the
feeling to go away forever.  

     He wanted to feel good again.  The *weird* good, like when
Alice had held his hand; when she had picked him up and held him
in her arms, so that he could see the animals over the fences
that were taller than his head...

     He stared sullenly at his socks.  In the kitchen, he could
hear the faucet running as Alice filled the glass vase with
water.  A moment later, she came into the living room.

     "Here you go, Rin," said Alice, as she carefully placed the
crocus bulb on the mouth of the vase, so that its bottom touched
the water.  "You'll need to lower the water level as the roots
grow, but soon you'll have a beautiful flower to enjoy."

     Rin ignored her, and continued to stare at his feet.

     "Rin, what's wrong?"

     "Nothing!"

     Alice sighed.  "Come on, Rin, we were having such a good
time earlier today.  Why are you sulking all of a sudden?"

     Silence.

     She knelt down next to him.  "Are you... thinking about that
story that Jinpachi and Issei told us?"

     The story...

     Rin looked up then, his eyes wide with realization and
looking particularly intense on his young face.  "Alice," he
said.  "I've met you before too.  When I saw you, it was deja
vu!"

     Alice smiled, a bit uneasily, and raised an eyebrow.  "For a
seven-year old, you sound very adult sometimes.  It's cute, but a
little scary."

     "Are you in love with that Jinpachi jerk?" Rin demanded.

     Alice blinked.  "Wh-what?"

     "You heard me!"  Rin stood, trembling.  He could feel the
tears burning behind his eyes, but he held them back with the
fire of his anger.  "I'll bet you want to marry him!"

     Alice leaned back, startled and bewildered by the force of
his vehemence.  "Wh-what if... I said yes?"

     Rin's eyes widened.  The ache washed up through him, filling
his mind with a painful haze.  He snarled, and, on impulse, he
grabbed the vase with the crocus bulb.  Running out to the
balcony, he climbed up onto the railing, straddling it, with the
vase held in his outstretched hands.

     "Rin!"  Alice came towards him, alarm creasing her face. 
"Don't!  That's dangerous, get down from there right now!"

     Rin just looked at her angrily.  "Watch this, Alice," he
said.

     And dropped the vase.

     He looked down, then, and watched it fall.  

     The vase plunged swiftly past ten stories of building, to
disappear in the leaves of the great oak tree far beneath.  The
shivering sound of shattering glass against the concrete was
spectacularly loud, even from his high distance.

     It was a long way down, he realized, with a numb tightening
of his chest.

     He stared after it a moment, in the darkness of the evening. 
The sound of the breaking glass seemed to shake something loose
within him.  He blinked, surprised at the sudden swell of
horrible realization that washed over him, penetrating the haze
of his anger.

     Oh no...

     He had destroyed Alice's gift. 

     And he could hear her standing next to him, her breath
coming in ragged gasps.  He pulled his gaze up from where the
crocus had fallen to its demise, to look at Alice.  She was
staring down into the darkness.

     When she lifted her gaze, her eyes were glistening wet, her
lips trembling.  She raised her hand, pulled it back, and Rin
watched numbly, unmoving.

     "What a *hateful* child you are!" she cried.

     Her slap struck him across the face.

     Rin felt the world tilt.  His gaze locked with Alice's, and
in that moment he saw, in her wet brown eyes, the surge of
understanding, of raw fear that he felt explode within himself...

     ...as he fell...

     ...fell backwards, into the darkness...

     He reached out with a cry of terror, but there was nothing
to hold onto, nothing to grasp, he was already plunging head
first towards the ground...

     Something snagged his sock, his foot, halting his fall.  His
upside-down body swung back and hit the metal railing.  The blood
was rushing to his head, he could hear his pulse thudding in his
ears.  And through the throbbing, he could hear Alice's screams,
he could feel the tight grip of both her hands as she clung
fiercely to his foot and ankle.

     His foot began to slip out of the sock.

     "Somebody help me!" Alice screamed.  "Mother!  Mother!"

     The darkness of the ground seemed to rush up to meet him as
he dangled there, upside-down, above the black abyss.  His
consciousness flickered like a candle flame in a fierce wind.

     *Mama!* he cried silently, unable to speak or even scream
past the thick terror squeezing his chest.  *Mama, help me..!

     *Alice..!*

     His foot was slipping from her grasp.  The darkness, rising
up from the ground, was pulling him away from her, even as her
fingers dug painfully, futilely through the material of his sock,
unable to find purchase.

     Alice was screaming.  "DEAR GOD, SOMEBODY HELP ME!" 
     
     His foot came free, and he fell.

     And he was surrounded by nothing; he felt nothing but the
sickening plummet of his stomach, heard nothing but the
thundering pulse of blood in his ears.

     Then, a light touch, a brush of wind, and for a wild, mind-
numbing moment, he thought Alice was with him again.

     But then it was gone.

     And the darkness swallowed him.


~*~
Am I a Man Who Dreams He Is a Butterfly...
~*~

     
     "Shion... Shion!  Wake up!"

     He opened his eyes, his mind fuzzy as the blurry image of a
blond-haired man swam into view above him.

     A stranger...

     Anger, sharp and tinged with fear, surged through him, and
he sat up, snapping his arms in front of him aggressively, ready
to fight.  But the blond man wasn't even looking at him at the
moment, having walked over to open a small drawer in the wall. 
He began rummaging through it with haste.

     What the...?  Where was he?  What was going on?

     And then he saw the back of his hand.  He froze in alarm.

     His hand was huge, with long, strong fingers, and strange
brown skin.

     Not his hand...

     A violent thrill of panic rushed through him.  "Who..." he
asked, and paused again.  His voice was an unfamiliar deep, rich
thrum in his ears.

     "It's just me, you idiot."  The blond man pulled something
out of the drawer and threw it at him.  He caught it
instinctively.  It was a bundle; a white shirt and a pair of
trousers.  "You're late for your shift, so wake up already."

     He looked at the blond man, his thoughts a jumble of jigsaw
pieces, desperately trying to fall into place.

     "Gyokulan?" he whispered.

     "What?  Here, take your shoes."

     Gyokulan...  He blinked slowly.  Yes, of course he knew
Gyokulan.

     And his hands, his voice... how could he have thought they
weren't his?  He shook his head trying to clear his mind of what
seemed like infinite layers of cobwebs.  The layers peeled away
reluctantly, but gradually his mind cleared.

     "Come on, get up.  Shusulan was looking pretty steamed when
I snuck past the control room."

     "Lay off for a second, jerk," he muttered, sitting up and
rubbing his temples.

     Gyokulan snorted.  "Nice to see you cheerful as ever, Mr.
Sunshine," he said.  "This is the thanks I get for trying to
spare you from Shusulan's temper."

     "I can handle Shusulan."  

     "Of that I have no doubt.  I'm more worried about the safety
of the others, to be honest.  Don't want them getting caught in
the crossfire."  Gyokulan eyed him critically and his voice lost
its joking tone.  "Hey... are you feeling okay?"

     "Would I have slept in if I was feeling okay?" he snapped.

     "Hey, no need to jump on my back."  Gyokulan frowned
worriedly.  "I was just thinking that maybe you should go see
Shukaido, let him check you out.  I know you.  You *never* sleep
in, and yet this is three times in one week.  And, to be honest,
you look like hell.  Maybe you're not getting enough REM sleep,
or something."

     Shion scowled, but said nothing.  If there was anything he
*didn't* need, it was more REM sleep.

     That dream again...

     That terrible, disorienting dream.  He could barely remember
it now, but the feeling of it was still there.  A feeling of
aching pain, of too-fragile joy teetering on the dark edge of
despair...

     He'd already had enough of that in his life.  Did it have to
haunt his dreams as well?

     He forced it out of his mind.  "I'll be fine," he said
irritably, swinging his legs over the edge of his bed and getting
to his feet.

     Gyokulan raised a skeptical eyebrow as he turned to leave,
but said nothing.  

     As soon as his friend was gone, Shion quickly dressed, and
then went into the small bathroom adjacent to his sleeping
quarters.  He leaned on the sink with one arm.  "Cold," he said,
and the faucet gushed on his command.  He splashed a handful of
frigid water in his face.  "Stop."  The faucet obeyed.  Wiping
his eyes with his fingers, he straightened and reached for a
towel.  As he did, he caught a glimpse of himself in the small,
eye-level mirror mounted above the sink.

     He froze.

     A shock of ebony hair, hanging over large, slanted dark eyes
in a bronze-skinned face.

     His face.

     Why in the holy name of Sahjaleem had he expected to see
someone else?

     Pushing his unease from his mind, he dried his face, and
made haste for the corridor door, grabbing his tool case on the
way.  He had a ton of work ahead of him.  As usual.

     The former sterile, white halls of the moon base were choked
with plant life.  Knee-high blades of grass grew impossibly out
of the floor grids, and vines covered the walls and ceiling,
growing out of the ventilation ducts, as well as poking into the 
seams of the fragile computer panels.

     Barely suppressing a growl, Shion began to wade through the
tall grass, making his way down the corridor.

     As if his duties weren't already impossible.  Trying to
upgrade the archaic equipment and computer systems of the old
base was hard enough as it was.

     But then Mokulen had to go and sing to her plants.

     Within hours, the plants had grown out of control and had
overrun the entire station.  He himself had awoken to find his
room full of bright pink flowers, each pungent blossom at least
the size of his hand.  And he nearly couldn't get up for all the
vines wrapped around his bed.

     Of course, the plants wreaked havoc on all the hardware,
destroying weeks worth of his hard labor.  He had spent the past
few days plucking vegetation from the main computer's delicate
innards.  Was it any wonder he was angry?

     Then again, Mokulen wouldn't have sung to her plants if she
hadn't been so upset over their argument the night previous...

     A bit of regret flashed through Shion's dark eyes. 

     *Silly, over-emotional woman...*

     His heart felt heavy and muted, and he couldn't seem to work
up the derisive emotion to match the thought. 

     The door to the now relatively plant-free main control room
slid open, and Shusulan turned in her chair to greet him.

     "Shion" she said icily.  "How nice of you to finally decide
to grace me with your presence."

     "Don't start, Shusulan," he growled.

     The short-haired red-head ignored his black look, giving him
one of her own as she stood from her seat at the main control
panel.  "You're not the only one in this station, you know," she
said.  "I have things I need to take care of as well, and I
certainly don't have time to wait for you to slink on in here
whenever you damn well feel like it."

     Shion gazed at her stonily.  "If you're so short on time, I
guess you'd better hurry and get the hell out of my face."

     Shusulan flushed angrily.  "I don't have to take this.  If
you're ever this late again, Shion, you may find yourself pulling
a double shift."

     "Empty threats."  Shion knelt next to the main computer, 
removed one of the base panels, and opened his tool case. 
"Unless, of course, you want to take on the glamorous task of
getting rid of the plant life in systems 43-K through 87-Z.  Then
I'll be more than happy to cover your shift for you."

     The woman seethed in silence for a moment.  Then she headed
for the door.  "This is all your fault, Shion," she said.  "You
deserve all this extra work, for being so cruel to Mokulen."

     Shion felt his jaw clench convulsively, but when he looked
up, Shusulan was already out the door.

     Good riddance.

     Cruel.  He wasn't cruel to Mokulen.  He had simply pointed
out how foolish some of her ideas were.  Okay, perhaps he had
been a bit blunt.  Maybe even... caustic.

     But everyone else on the station, especially Gyokulan and
Shukaido, practically bowed and scraped to the woman as if she
were the Goddess herself.  She was nothing more than a spoiled
girl, pampered beyond repair by the nuns who raised her, simply
because she was born with the rare powers of a Keeches.

     So Mokulen had been born with the Mark of Sahjaleem on her
forehead, while other Keeches weren't marked until at least
adolescence.  So what?  So she could talk to plants and animals. 
It didn't mean she knew the best way to go about observing the
Earth, and it certainly didn't mean she knew anything about
engineering.

     Powers meant nothing.  He himself had been born Sahches, and
what good had his abilities ever done him?  Though, he had to
admit, his powers were of quite a different nature than hers. 
Hers seemed borne of light and life, while his...

     ...his powers...

     *...blood... the soldiers were bleeding, with their eyes and
mouths wide open, bodies motionless, broken, shattered, I didn't
mean to, I didn't mean it, I was so hungry I just wanted some
food and they were going to kill me and it just happened I didn't
mean it...*

     Shion screwed his eyes shut against the memory, welling like
black oil from the dark depths of his childhood...

     No.  His past, perhaps.  Not his childhood.  Not really. 
Children smiled and laughed and played and joked...

     He had never been a child.  

     And that was the difference between him and Mokulen.  Ever
since the first time he saw her, he knew.  When he looked at her,
he saw a beautiful, naive child of light; light that seemed to
shine directly into the dark depths of his soul, where a filthy,
starved war orphan in rags lay huddled in the darkness and
shivering amongst the carnage...

     She saw that deep, hidden part of him, the part he loathed,
the part he feared... he was sure of it.  With all that light,
how could she not?

     He heard the door slide open behind him.

     "Shion."

     Shion suppressed a groan. Shukaido.  What did *he* want?

     "Gyokulan said you weren't feeling well, and Mokulen asked
if I would check up on you."

     *Well, of course, if Mokulen asked,* he thought wryly.  Then
he paused.

     Mokulen was worried about him?

     "I'm fine," he said without turning his head, focusing his
attention on the damaged disk he was repairing.

     "Not according to Gyokulan."

     "Yeah, well, we both know that he's never been good at
minding his own business.  It's amazing, how he's always sticking
his nose in where he's not wanted, and yet he can never seem to
see the facts in front of his face."

     Shukaido lapsed into hurt silence -- as Shion knew he would,
after a barb aimed at their mutual best friend.  They had gone to
school together, the three of them, and the young physician had
always been the over-sensitive type, wide-eyed and eager to
please, but without a thick-enough skin to deal with the harsh
realities of life.

     Shion had always found him to be friendly and open, yet...
faintly annoying.  No doubt because of the young man's ever-
present blind optimism.  And right now, for some reason, his
feelings of annoyance towards his friend were amplified.

     "Just go away, Shukaido.  Can't you see I'm busy?"

     Silence.  Then, "Gyokulan said you've been suffering from
headaches and restless sleep."

     "Gyoku needs to take a flying leap out the airlock."

     Shukaido sighed patiently.  "I'm not going to leave until
you agree to let me examine you.  If you're sick, you should be
treated before it gets worse."

     Shion slammed his laser tool against the wall.  "Now look,"
he said, turning to face his friend.  "I've got a ton of work
that I need to get done, and I don't have time to--"

     He froze, startled, as he saw Shukaido's face.

     Shukaido hadn't changed; it was the same face he saw almost
every day.  Pale skin, smooth, bluish-lavender hair, with long
bangs that fell in a natural part down the middle.  Intelligent,
violet eyes that were entirely too innocent.

     Shukaido's brow creased with concern.  "Shion... what's
wrong?"
     
     "I..."  He didn't know.  A sudden pain lanced through his
head.

     The laser tool trembled in his hands, then fell from his
stiff fingers.  He clutched his head with a groan and collapsed
to the floor.  Darkness flickered at the edges of his vision.

     "Shion!"

~*~

     Sounds, ebbing, quiet and muffled, from the darkness.

     Weeping.  Somebody was weeping...

     *...Alice?*

     Pain.

     "...my count.  One, two, three... move."

     "...head injury, skull fracture..."

     Pain.

     "...so small... can't find a good vein... how old?"

     "Six, maybe seven... babysitter pushed him off a 10-story
balcony..."

     "...monster..."

     "Got one... IV's in..."

     Pain.

     *Mama... Mama, I'm scared...

     *Alice...*

     Darkness.

~*~

     Shion opened his eyes.

     A plush cushion of fragrant grass, vines and flowers,
cradled him in a lush, living embrace.  Above him, through the
great window, the Earth hung in space like a great blue and white
jewel.

     The dream again.  And, like so many times before, it melted
from his mind like frost in the morning sun, leaving him with
nothing but a vague feeling of...

     Mokulen stirred in his arms.

     He looked down at her, unsurprised, a soft smile curving his
lips.  Shifting slightly, he carefully lifted one hand to gently
brush the loose strands of golden hair from her smooth, ivory
face.

     Her eyes opened then, deep rich brown, and she smiled,
raising one hand to hold his against her cheek.

     "Shion," she whispered.  "Did you dream of Earth?"

     He nodded, once again startled at the warm thrill he felt at
the sound of her voice.  "But I don't remember."

     "It doesn't matter."  Mokulen closed her eyes contentedly,
and leaned against his chest.  "If you dream, it is there, within
you, and it will be with you always."

     Shion didn't reply.  He just held her close, and felt her
warmth and light... amazed all over again that she could love
him.

     After the bitter bleakness of his life; after every scathing
word and gesture he had inflicted, not only on others, but on
her...

     By Sahjaleem.  How could he have ever hurt her?  The sweet,
wonderful creature in his arms that had withstood his harshness,
and then went on to soothe the nightmares of his past, sparking a
light in the dark depths of his soul, pulling him slowly from a
morass of fear and self-loathing...

     She even saved him from the despair of the moment.

     For the others were gone.  

     When Shukaido discovered the terrible, contagious virus that
was making Gyokulan so violently ill, it was already too late. 
They couldn't even call for help or medical supplies from the
home worlds, for the opposing governments were caught up in the
midst of a vast interstellar war, and were far too busy to worry
about a tiny outpost monitoring an insignificant planet on the
outskirts of the galaxy.

     Only a few days later, as Gyokulan lay deathly ill, Hiragi
was the one to decipher the garbled communications that trickled
through to their feeble communications relay station.  Leader
that he was, his voice didn't even crack when he broke the news.

     Virtually everything had been destroyed.  Entire worlds
blown to space dust.  Family and friends gone.

     Not even anyone left to respond to their transmitted pleas
for help.

     Shukaido had worked feverishly to find a cure for the virus,
but the equipment was so old, far too archaic to meet his
research needs.

     Shusulan died soon after Gyokulan, and then Hiragi followed. 
Soft-spoken Enju was next, and then Shukaido himself contracted
the illness... even as he finally discovered a vaccine.

     A vaccine that he gave to Shion and Mokulen, so that they
could survive.

     Shion closed his eyes.  His friend had saved them.  And he
*would* survive.  In spite of everything, the horror and the pain
and the terrible grief of worlds destroyed and friends lost...

     He felt Mokulen's hand against his cheek, wiping away
wetness.  "My love..."  She didn't ask the reason for his tears;
she knew all to well.  She held him close.

     The Earth is our future, she had said.  Together they would
save it from the terrible fate their own worlds had suffered. 
Somehow...

     He didn't know how.  It didn't matter.  He held Mokulen
close, taking comfort in her warmth and love.  Nothing mattered,
as long as they were together.

     Mokulen's hair was soft against his face, and smelled of
wild flowers.  "As long as you're with me," he whispered.

~*~

     *As long as you're with me...*

     Rin's eyes snapped open, wide and full of knowledge.

     A tear slid slowly down his cheek towards his ear as he
stared at the hospital ceiling.


~*~


End of Part One


Well, what do you think?  Obviously, there's lots more story to
tell, and I've got a lot more planned, mostly filling in the gaps
of the OAV, using the manga as inspiration.  Should I continue? 
Or just toss the whole project and do something more productive
with my life? ^_^ Speak your peace, I can take it.

Krista