This was kind of weird, but I decided to write it anyway.
Don't ask me where I got the title from. It just came to me while
I was writing this.

Is this offensive? If it is tell me.

All of the characters belong to Takahashi. So don't sue me!

A Totally Non-sensical Tripe production

Of a Ryoucilo film

Fertility vs. Sterility

"So Mr.Saotome is sterile?" the doctor asked from behind his desk.
Ranma jumped up from his seat and shouted,"Hey I ain't sterile!"
Akane sighed and pulled Ranma back into his seat. She was sitting
in a chair next to Ranma. She looked at Ranma with growing
annoyance and said,"Ranma, face facts. You. Are. Sterile."
Ranma grumbled out,"Even if I am sterile it's all Ryouga's fault."
Akane said,"Ranma! How long are you going to keep up this grudge?!
He apologized a thousand times for it Ranma!"
"What that bastard did to me was unforgivable! How dare he use such
a viscous attack on me!"
"Ryouga said that he would never use the Bollock Smasher again Ranma!"
Ranma calmed down a little and the doctor said,"So are you sure that
you want to have a child through artificial insimination?"
Akane said,"We want to have a child naturally."
Ranma said,"Hey, you know I was thinking-"
"For once."
"Shut up! I was thinking what happens if you guys goof up? You know like
get some idiot's sperm or lose all of the samples."
"Don't worry Mr.Saotome I  assure you that we are a very 
competent medical facility and we will not make any errors."
---
"What do you mean all the samples were destroyed?!" 
The secretary really hated it when the doctor got all nervous. She
said,"Somebody left the smaples out in the sun all day. Why are you
so upset?"
The doctor began to run around in circles as he cried out,"Oh my god!
This is bad! This is SO bad! I have a patient out there right now! 
If I don't get a sample quick they might figure out that we goofed up
then they'll tell the board and they'll shut us down and I'll only
be able to get a job as a waiter! My career is over!"  
"Doc I'm sure that there is somebody out there who would be willing to
give their sperm."
"Yeah, but I need the sample now! Like somebody's going to just pop up right
this instant and give there sperm."
"Hello. Could you tell me where I am?" 
The secretary and the the doctor turned around and saw a very bewildered
Ryouga Hibiki. The doctor and the secretary looked at each other and said
simultaneously,"Perfect."
---
"Okay so you do know what to do right?"
"Do what?"
The secretary sighed and said to Ryouga,"You know."
Ryouga scratched his head. He couldn't figure out what these people wanted
him to do. The secretary gave him a plastic cup and was now expecting him
to do something. But what?
"I have no idea what you're talking about. Can you please just show me the 
way out?"
"Geeze you're stupid. We will pay you to do it."
Ryouga thought for a second. He did need some money to buy Akari a gift.
He said,"Okay, but please tell me what you want me to do?"
"Well, you see you take down your pants and..."
---
Ranma and Akane were still sitting in their seats when the doctor came
back into the room.
"The sample should be ready in just a few minutes Mr.and Mrs. Saotome.
So there is absolutely no need to wor-"
"You want me to do what?!" 
Ranma said,"What was that?"
The doctor smiled and said,"Oh, it's nothing. You must be hearing things-"
"Come on! You probably do it all the time!" 
"-uh, yes you must be suffering from some kind of hearing disease where-"
"I do not!" 
"-you hear things that are not really there."
Ranma shrugged his shoulders and said,"Whatever you say. I'm getting tired
of
sitting around and waiting.Mind if I walk around?"
The doctor said,"Sure. Just don't walk into any rooms."
"I won't," Ranma said as he left the room.  
---
Ryouga gave the cup back to the secretary. She smiled and said,"See now that
wasn't too hard. Now please give me back the magazine."
Ryouga handed her the skin mag back and said,"Those are quite some
pictures."
The secretary said,"Yeah, but next time you look at them you might want to
pinch your nose."
The secretary walked away as Ryouga examined his shirt which was entirely
covered
in blood. He looked down at his hand which had a wad of yen in it so he
figured that losing a couple of pints of blood was worth it.
"Ryouga."
Ryouga knew the voice and he was almost afraid to look. He turned around and
saw Ranma with clinched fists barely maintaining an air of calm.
"Heh. Heh. Hello Ranma."
Ryouga began to back away from Ranma.
"Ryouga you know what makes me really mad?"
"Uh, what?"
"It's not the fact that you kicked me in the balls."
"It isn't?" 
Ranma said as he walked closer to the lost boy,"What made me
so angry was the fact that you did it 568 times!"
Ranma jumped at the now running lost boy.
"Come back here so I can pay you back you bastard!"
Ryouga ran out of the building and was quickly followed by Ranma.
---

Several Years Later

Two people were sitting on a park bench. One was a young man wearing a brown
shirt and baggy traveling pants. He had green eyes and a pink stripe going 
through his hair. The other person was a young woman who was wearing a
school
uniform. She had short black hair and she also had green eyes.
The man said,"Ranko?"
Ranko said,"Yes Butaga?"
"Why do you think our dads hate each other?"
"I don't know. I asked my mom and she said it was a rather sensitive issue
and didn't say anything else."
"Guess we'll never know. Say do you want to come over for dinner?"
"Yeah, anything to get away from my mom's cooking. *Blech*."
"My mom's cooking so we're not going to be having any pork."
"That's okay. I can understand seeing as how you have a pig for a father."
"Hey! My dad is not pig. Well, at least not all of the time."
"Okay it's a date."
"We still go out on dates even though we're engaged?"
"Of course silly. We have to get to know each other better."
"I can think of some better ways we can get to know each other."
Butaga leaned over and began to kiss Ranko very passionately.Ranko pushed
him away.
"Stop that! Not in public!"
Butaga said in a fake French accent,"But I would make love to you anywhere!
I would even make love to you if you were my sister!"
Ranko giggled and said,"Stop it Butaga! That's the stupidest thing I've ever
heard you say!"
Butaga smiled and said,"Yeah, I mean who in their right mind would think
we're
related?"

Until I find better things to write about. Ja ne.