Ranma: Thank you Nabiki, Kuno is off my back. Worked out how
to get him off Akanes?

Nabiki: That's an impossibily. WHo next?

Ranma: Both difficult. The Ghoul or the gymnast.

Nabiki: The ghoul.

Ranma: Why the ghoul?

Nabiki: Because this way we get rid of a 'fiancee'.

Ranma: Makes sense. But how?

Nabiki: We have to approach her together. Cologne's as clever
as I am but fortunatley haggish so she prewarns people to be
cautious whereas being cute disarms them. You could probably
take her in a fight and I could take her in a debate but

Ranma: She'll fight you and debate me, if we approach
separatley. But there is a way to deal with this. Mousse is
Shampoo's Shieldman. It is his job to help her in anyway he
can. It is a high honour for him to be the only man granted
that.

Nabiki: Intersting. It does explain why Cologne is so eager
to get rid of you and Shampoo. Mousse should have arrived
on the first time. But of the two people who could have
stopped him Shampoo wouldn't. That means Cologne. Umm-hmm

Ranma: Blackmail material?

(Nabiki nods.)

Nabiki: We need proof though..

Ranma: Problem is how, the ghoul will never admit it. Even
if they listened to Mousse he doesn't make a good eyewitness..

Nabiki: ..and they won't listen to a mere male. There has
to be a reason in the laws Mousse is here. No Matriarch would
allow him to defy them.

Ranma: Unless he'd be more trouble in a village. Remember
their champion is gone. And Mousse is better than Shampoo.
He can aim to miss. If he was there he could be a symbol
for rebellion.

Nabiki: See thinking isn't that hard.

Ranma:(tired) Very funnny Nabiki. What about the offer I made.

Nabiki: I'd love to accept but it wouldn't do your reputation
any good.

Ranma: I don't mind that. Look as I pointed out earlier my
reps almost as bad as yours.

(Now we notice Akane has been listening outside. And she
like you has jumped to the wrong conclusion.)

Akane:(from outside) PERVERTED JERK!

Ranma: Just my luck.

Akane: How could you, Nabiki! I expect it from Ranma but you!

Ranma: um, excu...

Akane: QUIET. I'll deal with you later.

Ranma: *What's the point?* <Sprrr>. VIOLENT TOMBOY.

(Nabiki is looking on suprised as Ranma dodges every blow
She spurts out a question at an inappropiate time)

Nabiki: Ranma why haven't you been hit yet?

<KERTHUDD>

Nabiki:*IDIOT!*

(Kasumi enters and takes Akane out of the room.)

Ranma: Honestly, Akane's getting more paranoid. I only 
offered you a martial arts lesson.

Nabiki: She's got reason. I think I like you Ranma

Ranma: So I like you.

Nabiki: (empahasing) I like you a lot.

Ranma faints again)

Kasumi:(re-entering) Honestly you shouldn't tease Ranma
like that.

Nabiki:(protesting) I' not (realising) Not in the way your
thinking ayway.

Kasumi: Oh dear.Not you as well.

(Nabiki just nods miserably.)

Kasumi: Things will work out, they always do.

Nabiki: Could you help us with this?

Kasumi: Oh is that the time I'd better put dinner on.

Nabiki:*Thanks ever so much,*

(Ranma now comeds round.)

Ranma: Would a taped confession do?

Nabiki: That it might! That it might. But keep quiet about
it...

Ranma: Until we're well away from the Nekohanten.

Nabiki: Sorry I'm not used to you being intelligent

(Nabiki gives an evil grin)

Ranma: V. Funny. Let's go!

Nabiki: Wait Ranma. Lets sort it out first.

(Much later)

Khu Lon: Ah son-in-law.

Ranma: I'm not.

Khu-Lon: Great Grandson in Law just doesn't have the same
ring.

Ranma: I'm just wondering why Shan Poo's shieldmaiden didn't
accompany her to Japan. Because unless Shan Poo has a good
reason.. She can be no amazon.

Khu-Lon: her sheildmaiden was held up a matriach of the
Amazons and sealed in a cave. 

Ranma: Why?

Khu-Lon: A sheild-maiden. Hmmph. Her sheildmaiden was a
male.. She would be humiliated. I did what I had  to to stop
that.

(Ranma dissappears out the Nekohanten fast. Khu Lon is
already waiting.)

Khu-Lon: Hand over the tape.

Ranma: You win.

(Ranma leaves)

(Two days later a letter comes through the Nekohanten)

<Cologne,
        I'm not that stupid. Nor is Ranma come to that.
We did have a back-up made. Now unless you want the
council to hear you'd better retract Shampoo's claim
Ranma doesn't think I'm going quite this far. You're
clocks a bit slow. I just won.

                        Nabiki

PS If you question ranma about this, the tape goes to the
council.>

(Cologne screams a horrifying scream)

David Houghton E-mail houghtod@dcs.kcl.ac.uk
Fanfiction www.spods.dcs.kcl.ac.uk/~houghtod/fanfic.html