R1/2 -- [Part 4]
Shie shie! Shie shie! If you're reading this, then you're still
interested in what I have to say. If not, then somebody's going to miss
out on some explaining, and just whose fault is that going to be, hmmmm.
So I got carried away a little with the third chapter, but hey, you got to
see Nabiki crumple before your eyes (Don't mess with me, Nabiki fans, I
have Happy and Shampoo on my side). And for those of you that always
wanted to see Kunou kiss the pig-tailed girl, I want you to know that
you're sick and should seek professional help. Thank you.
Now, Happy, if you'll do the honors....
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| An Iron Dagger Production |
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"I'm sorry to have to call you so late, Doc, but Mr. Tendo insisted that
you be the one that looked at her." Ranma, in male form once more, leaned
against the wall beside the closet.
"Oh, no, really Ranma, it's no trouble. I'm always ready to help out, and
the Tendos are the closest thing I have to family around here." Dr. Tofu
buzzed around Nabiki's bed with stethoscope and tongue depessor in hand,
carefully monitoring her vital signs like... one of those really neat
vital-sign-monitoring machines at the hospital.
Ranma methodically replayed the events at the high school. He shuddered
every time he passed over the part where Kodachi morphed into a... a...
cat--well, actually, he shuddered at other parts too. _Nabiki's more
cool-headed than I am without a doubt, but it looked like she'd been scared
out of her mind back there._ He folded his arms. "So, Doc, how's she
going to be?"
Still busy with his patient, he said, "Oh, Nabiki will be fine. It's
remarkable really. At first, it seemed like she was in a severe state of
shock, but now, her pulse is returning to normal. She just needs rest
right now."
Having said that, Tofu placed the depressor back in his doctor's bag.
"Again, from what you've told me, it sounds like you did an excellent job
of protecting the Tendos--in this case, Akane's sister."
"...." Ranma wondered where he got that from, remembering how little he
had to do with Nabiki's rescue.
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| Writen and Directed by: |
| Christopher Lee Collins |
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Tofu closed the door behind him, and Ranma moved over to Nabiki's bed.
She was still so pale that it almost wasn't Nabiki. It was a good thing
she was asleep or she probably would have died of embarrassment. He knelt
beside her and took her hand in his. She still felt like ice.
Next, he cocked an ear when he heard voices below:
"Oh, Dr. Tofu, is my little sister going to be Ok?"
"Ah ha ha, Kasumi, of course, um, everything will be fine."
"Thank you for coming, Dr. Tofu. I'm glad you're here."
"Oh ah eh, thank you Kasumi, ha ha, but I have to go now. He he, I'll see
you ah tomorrow?"
"Dr. Tofu? Why are you holding Daddy's hand like that?"
"Please, Mr. Tofu, I couldn't. It's so sudden."
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| Based on Characters Created by: |
| Rumiko Takahashi |
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After staying with Nabiki a few more minutes, still seeing no change in
condition, Ranma pulled the covers high over her shoulders and turned out
the light. He had always wondered if that girl ever felt anything, but he
didn't want to find out this way.
He looked back one more time before closing the door. He then leaned up
against the wall next to it and folded his arms. He had to think. _There
is something more going on here than just a bunch of scary creeps tryin to
kill us. But what?_
Just then, Kasumi came around the corner from the staircase. Her billowy,
blue nightgown and soft, ballet-like strides made her appear like an angel
ascending from the mortal plane. She stepped up to Ranma and stood by the
opposite wall.
"Is my sister alright?" She had that heartstriking, glassy-eyed look like
she was about to cry.
"I donno. But if the doc says she'll be alright, I'd believe 'im."
"First Akane. Now Nabiki. Am I next? I'm so scared." She brought her
arms to her chest to show her insecurity.
"Aw, you don't have anything to worry about. I'll make sure of it.
Nothin'll happen to you as long as I'm around." Ranma unlocked his arms
and pointed his thumb in his direction.
Kasumi's eyes sparkled with gratitude. Without warning, she threw her
arms around Ranma and pulled him close with more strength than he thought
she had in her. "Thank you for watching over us." While Ranma was still
stunned, her lips flew over his.
The door to Akane's room slowly opened and a weakened Akane stubbornly
shuffled out. "Must have... something... to drink." She turned and saw
Ranma and her sister lip-locked against the wall and promptly passed out.
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| Ranma Saotome and Akane Tendo |
| in: |
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Ranma quickly retreated down the hall while Kasumi put Akane back to bed.
_Oh, man! I can't believe she did that! What'd she have to do that for?
SHE kissed me! And not too long ago, I kissed... Kun... Something was
definitey wrong with everybody!_
He entered his own room. Ukyou was still asleep on the cot that had been
set up in the corner of the room, which Kunou felt she deserved more than
the 'lecher Ranma'. (When the pig-tailed girl pointed out that Ranma slept
on the floor, Kunou winced at his mistake, then assuming that the cot was
hers. Kunou asked her to stay at his estate, but the pig-tailed girl
(Ranma) wanted to stay to keep Ukyou safe from Ranma when he got home.
Kunou commended her bravery and said goodnight. (CUTE VOICE: Girl-type
Ranma... safe from Boy-type Ranma? Shampoo confused.) (NOTE: I know you
are.))
Without even removing his shirt, he plopped down on his sleeping-mat to
get some rest. He brought his fingers to his tingling lips. _But it
really wasn't that bad._ Ranma just wasn't sure which kiss he meant, and
that scared him.
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| HELLCATS |
| Chapter IV |
| "Truth Etched in Stone" |
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Ranma walked along the fence to school while Ukyou followed via the
sidewalk. She was wearing Ranma's clothes again: another one of his
sleeveless Chinese outfits. (She'd have to return them someday; they were
almost too baggy on her, but they were very comfotable.) They said next to
nothing to each other, since they knew their conversation would inevitably
involve the events of last night.
Ukyou had no idea what to say to him anyway. Anything she'd say would
seem inappropriate, as would any question she posed. (OLD VOICE: Did Kunou
slip you the tongue? **WHAM!!** Look at the beauti...ful...pantie...)
Ranma likewise had no idea what to say to her. Too much was on his mind.
Like how he was going to live down what he did last night. No. More
importantly, how would he explain it.
An almost distant memory in his mind jerked, and he jumped down to walk
beside his friend. He hesitated to speak, but figured that it was
important. "Hey, Ucchan. You wouldn't by any chance have with you any of
those sticky bombs you used on me when we last fought?"
The okonomiyaki chef raised her eyebrows at him, surprised that he finally
said something but puzzled at the unusual request. She had made a few
earlier that week in case of emergency, but she supposed she was doing fine
without them. She stared at him a few seconds, then pulled out a small
sack of the rubber noodles and handed it to him. "Why do you want it?"
Ranma took the sack and hurled it over the opposite wall. "Gift for a
friend."
She looked at him a few more seconds, but he was back in his
leave-me-alone-I'm-thinking mode, so she just shrugged.
Meanwhile, over the wall, Ryouga growled as he awakened to find his limbs
restrained to the wall and ground with some kind of glue, like he had just
fallen into a giant wad of chewing gum. He pulled with all of his
early-morning strength, but only succeeded in ending up in the same
position he started from. _Curses! This is going to take me a while._
Ranma and Ukyou entered Furinkan High still in deep thought. As soon as
the student body became aware of their presence, gossip started: "Look,
he's back.""That pervert.""Look, Kuonji is wearing Ranma's clothes.""Why is
she walking with him?""Why are they so close together?""What did he do with
Akane?"
They tried to ignore the passing comments. Ranma simply could not miss
another day of school; if he did, he might as well lock himself in his room
for a week doing backup assignments. Ukyou didn't want to run out because
she was only going to school half the time as it was.
They were early once more--what a record (for Ranma anyway). Since Akane
wasn't at breakfast to harass him, Ranma got through eating in no time.
Although, he had to admit that things weren't the same without her
harassments.
Seemingly from out of nowhere, Kunou stepped in front of Ranma's path and
pointed the tip of his wooden sword at Ranma's chest. Ranma stopped but
did not react. "The gods of battle frown upon you, coward Saotome, for
your untimely absence in the rescue of the fair, yet miserly and
overcharging Nabiki Tendo. You have at last shown your true colors. I
cleary heard Kuonji-kun remark that your presence was expected."
Kunou's eyes took a softer tone and appeared to drift toward the sky.
"Against the insurmountable odds, I had the unexpected privelige of
battling alongside the graceful and eligant Pig-tailed, Treeborn, Kettle
Goddess, and she has finally declared her affection for me..." His face
contorted and became darker. "...away from your evil and binding sorcery!"
The swordsman stepped back into a battleready stance. Ranma rolled his
eyes. "What's wrong, Saotome, are your precious powers fading? With the
pig-tailed goddess now at my side, we shall liberate the weaker from your
icy grip! Ukyou Kuonji...."
!!!WHAM!!!
Ukyou held the battle spatula on his head a few seconds longer while she
gritted her teeth and made sure Kunou's face would be imprinted into the
walkway permanently. She then rested the handle on her shoulder and
followed Ranma into the building.
"I am not weaker than you." _And he was beginning to impress me._
Ranma's tone remained unchanged. "Hey, I didn't say a thing." _At least
one thing is returning to normal._
* * * * *
Everyone stopped and stared at the tall, mysterious, white robed and
cowled man striding up the sidewalk. No one saw where he came from--he
just sort of appeared--and he didn't speak to anyone. He just kept a
determined pace wherever he went, not quite slow enough to be considered a
walk and not quite fast enough to be considered a jog.
The deeper he got into Nerima, though, the more he slowed to a more
mannerly pace. Despite the indifference with which he moved, he seemed to
know exactly where to go. And at last, he found it. He looked up at the
sign: 'The Cat Cafe'.
He calmed himself and opened the door into another sea of curious people.
He quickly found an empty table and sat down, folding his arms in front of
him.
Shampoo watched the ghost-like figure sail across the room and sit down.
_Spooky._ He almost reminded her of Mousse (and he was spooky too). She
blinked a few times, then looked down at her waitress outfit, then looked
back up. _Looks like I have to take his order._
She walked up to him with notepad ready, looking at him sideways. "What
you want?"
The figure pulled back his ivory cowl to reveal a handsome, cleanshaven
face with fine, blonde hair pulled in a ponytail (like Ranma). "Excuse me
if I seem impatient, but I must find Master Happousai."
* * * * *
Enormous ghostly heads flew around Akane in a maelstrom of familar and
echoed voices: Ranma, Genma, her dad, her sisters, Shampoo, Happousai, and
many others. "YOU ARE SO UNCUTE, AKANE.""SO UNCUTE.""UNCUTE AKANE."
Akane tried as hard as she could to run through the deptless and colorless
plane, but everything looked the same and the heads were always there--it
was like jogging in place. "UNCUTE AKANE.""UNWORTHY AKANE.""HE DOESN'T
LIKE YOU, AKANE.""HE NEVER LIKED YOU."{{HE HATES YOU, AKANE.}}
She stopped running and glanced up with shivering eyes. "No. He does
like me. He doesn't really mean everything he says!"
"YOU'RE WRONG, AKANE.""HE LIKES UKYOU.""HE LIKES KASUMI.""HE KISS KASUMI."
Akane put her arms up defensively. "No! He almost kissed me once!"
Just then, Ranma stood by her side wearing a red tuxedo. "I love you,
Akane."
She turned and draped her arms around him. "Oh, Ranma, I love you too!"
Ranma's arms never left his side. "Get real, Akane! I was just playin
with you. Y'know, like you always do with me." Then, he vaporized and she
was left holding a cloud. She started to cry.
"UNCUTE AKANE.""DISGRACEFUL AKANE.""IT'S YOUR MOVE, TENDO.""SHAMPOO
GETTING DIZZY.""PANTIES...."
Akane instantly sat up in her bed with a gasp, her chest heaving like a
bellows. She brought a hand to her face; her forehead was dripping with
sweat. It was just a dream, she kept telling herself.
Her head didn't even hurt anymore--well, not that much. She felt hungry
and thirsty. _How long have I been out?_ Her window was thoughtfully
shaded to keep the sun from intruding her sleep. She looked at the digital
clock next to her bed.
_It's almost lunchtime! Missed breakfast. Missed school. Hungry.
Thirsty. Gotta get up!_
She started to throw the covers back, but then parts of the dream rushed
back to her, and she sank back under the covers. _Oh Ranma. How do you
really feel about me?_
* * * * *
The lunchbell rang and Ranma found himself walking away from the main
campus, still in his contemplative mood. When classes had started, Hiroshi
and Daisuke asked a few questions, but when he didn't say anything, they
decided to leave him alone. No one else in any of his classes had anything
to say to him, although he ocassionally heard indirected "Where's Nabiki"s.
When he finally found a spot along the forest surrounding the school where
no one could see him, he allowed himself to think--and worry. If people
were around, he felt they'd be able to hear his thoughts. _Maybe I should
go see if Akane's awake yet. But what would I say?_
Someone placed a slender hand on his shoulder and he stopped walking.
"There you are, Ranchan. I was beginning to think you left."
_She WOULD have to find me so fast._ Ranma didn't turn around.
"Shouldn't you be at Ucchan's right now?"
She walked around in front of him, and he looked up to her face. "So I'll
open a little late today. I wanted to make sure you were Ok."
"Well, I...."
"There you are, coward!" The two friends turned to see Kunou rounding the
corner. He stood a fair distance away while he gave his usual
before-battle speech: "Face me Saotome! The students whose lives you've
touched at this decent school soon wither like the leaves in Autumn! Your
wizardry cannot be tolerated any longer! You must be stopped, and I shall
stop you, for I am Tatewaki Kunou, The Blue Thunder of Furinkan High!" A
clash of thunder and a flash of lightning pierced the calm, blue sky.
Ranma shook his head slowly as Kunou ran for him with sword ready,
screaming: "Release the pig-tailed girl so that she may date with me!"
Ukyou halted Kunou's progress with a mighty swing of her spade, his sword
only inches from Ranma's chest; he went sailing over the school rooftop.
Ukyou turned to Ranma. "Why didn't you move?"
He shrugged. "I had plenty of time. But y'know, you're gettin good at
clobberin Kunou. I might let you do it from now on."
Ukyou shook him by the shoulders. "Snap out of it, Ranma! You can't give
up something as important to you as that!"
Ranma half-smiled. "You're right. What was I thinking." He sighed and
started to walk around her. "What would I do without you, Ucchan?"
As Ranma passed by, Ukyou kicked her foot out and knocked his legs out
from under him, forcing him to fall backwards; she caught him in her arms
and kissed him deeply before he could react (CUTE VOICE: Ok, Shampoo next!)
(NOTE: With Ranma or Ukyou?) (CUTE VOICE: Hnnn.).
Ranma felt like giving in and letting it happen, but something inside him
snapped and he violently pushed her away. He fell on the ground and held
himself up with his hands. "What'd'ya think you're doing?!"
Ukyou smiled seductively (NOTE: Yikes!!!). "I've always wanted to do
that." Her voice took a harsher tone. "And I wanted to know what Kunou
felt last night. I wanted to see, Ranma Saotome, if you still found women
attractive! If you could hold me in your arms like you did that jackass!"
She was yelling now, and a tear stared to run down her cheek.
"...?" Ranma cringed back. _What's wrong with her?_
Ukyou stepped over him threateningly with giant spatula ready. "It seems
I've got my answer! DIE RANMA!"
Ranma swept her legs out from under her and jumped on top to restrain her
arms. She started crying. "Why did you have to kiss... Kunou? Why
couldn't it have been me?"
Ranma closed his eyes and tried not to hear her weeping. _That's a good
question. Why did I have to do it? What ever possessed me to...._
To answer his question, a soothing female voice rang inside his head:
"Because in your woman form, you are still subject to a woman's needs.
Tatewaki Kunou had acted valiantly. He made you feel safe, and for an
instant, you found him alluring."
Ranma's eyes lit up with rage and terror. The thought sounded so absurd,
but in the back of his mind, he knew it to be true. Ukyou must have heard
it too because she was staring at him questioningly.
The phantom voice came back: "Come into the forest where we can talk. My
time is short."
Ranma and Ukyou looked at each other, then stared across the field to the
school. Crowds of faces eyed the two with a mixture of expressions. Ranma
and Ukyou looked at each other again, then sprang to their feet and tried
to appear innocent before speeding into the woods.
They slowed to a walk when they were out of range of prying eyes, then
carefully scanned the area for the owner of the voice.
Ukyou put a hand on Ranma's shoulder. "What did that voice mean you're
still subject to a woman's needs?"
The tone of her speech was still a little agitated, so Ranma tried to
shove her away politely. "It's... it's nothing."
The phantom answered: "When he is splashed with cold water, he becomes a
biological female. In that form, it is by sheer will alone that he keeps
at bay all the hormones and pheromones coursing through his body."
Ranma turned away and clenched his fists. Ukyou looked to either side,
then walked up to him. "Is that true, Ranchan?"
He finally spotted a white-cloaked figure sitting in the middle of a small
clearing. He darted in her direction to rip off her head. "How dare you
get inside my head! You...." He yanked the off the hood covering her face
before she could protest, then ran and hid behind Ukyou when he saw what
she looked like.
Ukyou started to back up as well. The seated figure had the head of a
tiger! The same orange-and-blue striped beast they fought last night!
Only this time, she seemed totally docile as she stared at the two with a
lost and helpless look. "And that is why Ranma detests the curse he picked
up from Jusenkyo." Her voice--her actual speaking voice--was haunting and
grated, but still feminine.
Ranma peeked over his shield's shoulder. "Please... leave my... personal
life... out of this, Ok?" Ukyou glanced back at him.
The cat-lady--Rose, Ukyou had heard her called--bent her head down. "I am
sorry if I discomfort you, but if you saw things the way I do, then a
person's secrets become trivial, and I forget that they are not."
Ukyou placed her hand on her weapon, but did not draw it yet. Ranma was
almost too scared to speak. Ukyou demanded, "Who are you and what do you
want?"
Rose sighed. "That is what I am here to talk to you about." She shook
her head at something. "I am afraid that I am the cause of your friends'
eratic behavior of late."
Ranma raised his eyebrows and forgot about his phobia of cats. Ukyou
crossed her arms in front of her. Rose, unmoving, began: "I have a unique
talent that allows me to send and recieve surface thoughts to and from
anyone I choose--telepathy, you might call it. However, in my lifelong
effort to master the talent, I have discovered the curse that would go with
it. My body constantly emmits a pheromone that intensifies emotional
response and rends a person uninhibited (CUTE VOICE: Shampoo need that!)."
"What?" Ranma stalked out from behind his friend, greatly angered by what
he thought she was trying to say. "What do you mean 'rends a person
uninhibited'?"
Rose watched the fighter, getting ready to move out of the way. "I must
concentrate to keep my powers from affecting someone, and it strains me to
keep everybody's emotions in check. Sometimes I do slip. Your bath with
Ukyou, your kiss with Kasumi Tendo, your kiss with Ukyou.... All happened
when I tried to get close enough to talk to you. Even now, I...."
Ranma pounced at her. "You tried to scare Nabiki to death!" Rose sprang
into a crouch and awkwardly managed to kick him away. Ukyou ran up and
restrained his arms. "Ukyou, what are you doing? Le'me go!"
Ukyou wouldn't be able to hold him long. She talked as fast as she could,
"I'm sure she has an explanation for everything, Ranchan, so I think we
should at least hear what she has to say."
Rose backed up, ready to run. "I stalked your Nabiki only so Sage would
believe I was still on his side. I made sure I did no permanent damage.
She should recover soon. In fact, she most likely will not remember any of
what happened when she wakes up."
Ranma stopped struggling, which relieved Ukyou. Rose swiftly moved over
to him and took his hand against his will. Ukyou started to break it up,
but something inside her told her not to. A cool aura rose around them and
the three calmed down; Rose explained, "I have temporarily restrained your
tensions and fears so we can talk face to face."
Ranma felt a little tingly at first, like when he shapechanged, but then
fell calm. But he was still mad. "Ok. You've got five minutes."
* * * * *
Akane ate some cereal at the counter in the kitchen while Kasumi washed a
few dishes. Kasumi felt uneasy because Akane kept staring at her
loathingly now and again, but she pretended not to notice.
Akane's head felt fine now, although she still had a small lump as a
reminder, but it should go away in a couple of days. She remembered what
she saw last night and wanted to pass it away as another dream, but
Kasumi's odd silence made her think otherwise. Akane, in turn, refused to
say anything to her sister; she came down the stairs herself and got her
own food--certain that she could manage pouring milk over cornflakes
without making a mistake.
She passed by Kasumi and placed her empty bowl in the sink, emitting a
slight grunt of displeasure without relizing it. That out of the way, she
left to go practice. Kasumi wept quietly without turning around.
Akane went to her room, replaced her nightgown with her favorite yellow
gi, then sprinted off to the dojo. She needed to work out some of her
frustrations.
She bowed at an imaginary opponent and began shadowboxing. Punch. Punch.
Punch punch. Punch punch punch kick. _Just warming up._ Punch punch
kick punch. Punch kick punch punch kick... She steadily increased her
routine as she started to think about Ranma.
Kick elbow punch... _Why did I ever put up with that pervert? All we ever
did was fight. Why should I care what he does or who he's with? It's not
like he cares about me._
She slowed her tempo a bit. _But he does, doesn't he. He's always there
for me when I really need him._ She punched faster. _Then why does he
always make fun of me? He always puts me down! Uncute! Too slow! Can't
cook! He never pays me a decent complement!" Punch punch kick elbow punch...
She slowed again. _But he has, hasn't he? I'm just to busy trying to get
back at him that I don't realize it. And then when I do realize it, it's
too LATE!_ She kicked faster. Punch kick elbow kick kick...
_He's always running around with other fiancees! He has too many!_ Punch
kick punch elbow kick punch... _But it's not really his fault, now, is it?
Ooooh noooo! Ranma's father arranged that engagement with Ukyou without
Ranma's knowledge, and Shampoo just throws herself at him just because he
happened to be a better fighter, and Kodachi just doesn't have a clue. I
don't consider that it's not really his fault. And what do I do? I get
jealous and we fight!_ Punch punch kick punch elbow punch kick... _I get
mad at him and he gets mad at me! Why can't I keep from getting mad?_
Punch kick punchpunch kick spinkick... _Why can't he pay more attention
to me? I'm his real fiancee! I'M the one that matters! Can't he see
that? I deserve him more than THEY do! I'm the one that really cares for
him! But what do I do? I give him reasons to hate me!_ Punchpunch
punchkick spinkick elbow punchpunch... _IT'S MY FAULT!_
Tears started to mix with sweat as she gave her imaginary oponent the
thrashing of its non-existant life. Punchpunchkick elbow spinpunch...
_I'M JUST A SLOW, FAT, UNCUTE TOMBOY WHO CAN'T COOK AND CAN'T FIGHT!_
Punchpunchpunchkickpunchelbowspinkickkickspinelbow... _I CAN'T KEEP FROM
FIGHTING WITH HIM AND JUST TELL HIM THAT I LOVE HIM AND NOW I'M LOSING HIM!_
Kasumi had heard Akane's battlecries and went to see if she was alright.
She crept up to the door and quietly pushed it aside. _Oh my. Akane?_
Punchspinkickpunchpunchkickpounduppercutkickkickkickspinkick... _I MUST
PROVE TO HIM WHAT HE MEANS TO ME! UKYOU CAN'T HAVE HIM!_ With that last
word, Akane drove her fist through the wall all the way to the elbow.
"Oh my, Akane." She started to run in her direction, but froze when
Akane's battle aura started radiating at full intensity. Akane turned
around and screamed, "YOU CAN'T HAVE HIM!" Kasumi started running back for
the door, but Akane sprang onto her back before she could finish a step.
Akane grabbed an arm and a head of hair and flung her sister back in the
center of the dojo. "FIGHT ME!"
Kasumi screamed so loud it was inaudiable. She tried to cry, but could
only manage a shrill squeak. Curling up into a fetal position, she
stammered, "Akane... I... ca... can't... fight..."
Akane drew back in dread, realizing what she had just done. She scrambled
to the floor next to her and threw her arms around her. _What have I done?
It's all my fault._
* * * * *
Ranma walked with Ukyou as she made her way to her restaurant. She had to
open sometime soon, preferably before the lunch hour was over. She kept a
normal walking pace so she and Ranma could clear a few things up.
Ukyou began, "Ok. So we know that these are the same guys Happousai and
his son met a long time ago, like you told me. And we know they're after
you."
Ranma held up four fingers and started counting down: "The first guy's
Parsley. Some sort of master of hidden weapons, like Mousse. He must have
been the creep I knocked out in front of Kunou at the school." He lowered
a finger.
Ukyou continued, "Then there's Sage, the leader. He can absorb just about
anyone he can get his hands on and gain their memories and skills. A real
horror movie monster. I gotta admit, it gives me chills just thinking
about it. He must have absorbed Kenny, Tsubasa, and Kodachi, and that's
who you've been fighting all along."
Ranma nodded and lowered another finger, then took over: "Next is
Rosemary." Ranma looked a little embarrassed. "We know what she can do.
Makes us do what we...." He trailed off.
Ukyou picked up: "What we feel at the moment, but are too afraid to."
Ranma hung his head down and lowered another finger. Ukyo concluded, "Then
we have this Thyme guy, who hasn't shown up yet, whom Rose didn't describe
too much."
Ranma shoved his hands into his pockets. "Then she said Pop can explain
the rest. Figures he'd have something to to do with makin my life even
more of a mess. I just wish she told us more before she left."
Ukyou slapped him upside the head with her giant spatula.
"Ow! What was that for."
She rested her weapon back on its strap. "What did you expect from her!
You only gave her five minutes before you threatened to beat her to a pulp!"
Ranma let his voice drop: "Uh. Sorry. I guess I got carried away back
there." He couldn't believe he actually threatened a GIRL--even if she
wasn't completely human.
A moment of silence passed between them as Ukyou waited for Ranma to say
something else. She finally had to ask, "What's wrong?" She recieved a
noncommital grunt. "It's what she said about you, isn't it." Ranma slowly
nodded. "It's true, isn't it."
Ranma gave a low groan. "Aw, why did Pop have to drag me to that stupid
training ground anyway?"
Ukyo walked a little closer to him. "So it is true. In girl form, you do
feel an attraction to..."
He threw his hands up. "Well I had no problem before SHE came along!
I've only had to deal with being half-girl..." He lowered his voice,
seeing that he was attracting attention. "...for a couple of months."
They stopped walking and Ukyou took his hand. "I understand, Ranchan.
Your secret's safe with me." She kept her head down for a few seconds
until she couldn't hold back any longer and burst out laughing:
"Hahahhahaahaha. I'm... sorry... Ranchan, but it's just... so... funny!
Hahahaha...." (NOTE: The ever understanding Ukyou.)
Ranma slapped his palm against his forehead and groaned. _Why me?_
The okonomiyaki chef's hysterical bout of laughter was interrupted when a
cab driver honked his horn. Ranma looked around and noticed they were
standing in the middle of the street. He yelled an apology and pulled his
friend by the hand to the other side of the street.
Pedestrians glanced in their direction as Ukyou held her hands out like
she was pushing herself out of a mime's glass box. "Ok, Ok, I've got
control of myself. I can handle it. Haha But it's just... so... funny!
Hahahahahaha...."
Ranma growled and grabbed her hand again, then started leading her down
the sidewalk. Ukyou quieted herself down to a giggle. "I'm really sorry,
Ranchan. Don't be mad. It's just that Akane and I are always complaining
that you don't know what we go through as women. Well hehe, I guess you
know more than we thought! Hahahahaha...."
Ranma grunted again. "Are you sure you'll be able to serve your customers
like this?"
They rounded the corner to Ucchan's and paused. Ukyou ceased her
outburst. Ranma voiced his thought: "What's Mikado doin here?"
Mikado Sanzenin paced in front of the darkened restaurant wearing a dark
blue tuxedo and slacks. When he saw the two friends just standing there,
he crossed the street to meet them.
Ranma looked up at him curiously. "Uh. Mikado. Howzit goin?"
Mikado dismissed the question with a wave of his hand. "If I did not have
elsewhere to look, then I would not be here, but my skating partner, Azusa
Shiratori, is missing, and we are due for practice in exactly one hour.
She is familar with you, Ranma, especially your fiancee's little, black
pig. I thought that maybe you had seen her lately."
Ranma looked wide-eyed at Ukyou. He had forgotten that the little girl
following her had vanished after the battle last night, and having a better
understanding of Sage's capabilities, things didn't look good.
* * * * *
Akane held her sister and looked into her tearstreaked face. Kasumi
wasn't even bruised, but she could have taken some serious damage had she
not remembered her breakfalls she learned from her childhood training.
"I'm really sorry, Akane. I didn't mean to kiss him." Her arms lay
trembling at her side in shock. "I don't know why I did it. I guess I've
always been grateful that he was around to look after you and.... Oh,
Akane, can you ever forgive me?"
Akane, a little puffy-eyed herself, smiled at her. "Of course I can
forgive you. That's what sisters are for. Now let me go get something to
dry your eyes with." Kasumi nodded and wearily sat up. Akane stood and
strode out the door.
Kasumi stared down at the floor. _Ranma is hers, now. That's the way
Father wants it._ She gave a sigh of relief, realizing that the engagement
was going to work out. _They really are crazy about each other._
Kasumi looked up when she heard footsteps approaching from behind, away
from the door. She blinked in confusion when she saw a bright-eyed,
brown-haired girl in a tutu standing next to her holding a telephone. _How
did she get in here?_ "Can you help Azusa fix Miranda? I think she sick."
Kasumi looked at the phone and giggled. "Of course I can. Here. Let me
see her."
"Your wish is my command." She swung the phone around and struck Kasumi
on the base of her skull; she went rigid, then slumped forward, unconscious.
Azusa quickly took her hand and a thin, red aura started to run up both
their arms. In seconds, the aura covered them completely and Kasumi's body
started to fade. The red glow started to retreat back into Azusa's hand,
and with it, her victim. The glow faded and she stretched her arms. "That
felt gooood."
Azusa suddenly felt nausious and her head started spinning. _Not now!_
Akane walked back to the dojo with a towel in her hand. She had also
brought the music box their mother gave them before she died--it always
made Kasumi feel better. She felt lousy for letting her temper get away
from her, but right now, she needed to cheer her sister up.
She turned down the hall and stepped into the dojo. "Kasumi, I
brought...." _Where did she go?" The room was empty except for an old phone.
* * * * *
Ranma told Mikado that he'd send Azusa in his direction if he found her;
Mikado didn't seem too pleased with his answer--or his own noneffective
search--and unmerrily sauntered back to the mansion.
Ranma walked Ukyou to the door; she gleamed with worry. "And you're sure
you didn't see her after I passed out--that is, after you pulled yourself
from Kunou's warm embrace?"
Ranma frowned and squinted his eyes at her. "C'mon! I'm serious here! I
didn't see her." Ranma folded his arms and turned away. "Come to think of
it, I don't remember seeing her when Sage and Rose ran off. But I know she
was still there after I caught her in the air."
"Oh, Ranma, we have to find her. But if Sage has got her...."
"*sigh* I know." Ranma turned around and put a hand on her shoulder.
"You should open Ucchan's now. I'll go talk to Pop and see if I can figure
out what's going on. Then I'll look for Azusa. Ok."
Ukyou pushed his hand away and started to unlock her shop. "No way!
Okonomiyaki can wait. You're not going anywhere without me. Just let me
get a few things."
Ranma sighed and shook his head. _Well, I suppose I could use her help on
this one._ Ranma leaned against the wall and watched the passing traffic
while he wondered if Akane was awake yet--and what she would do when she
caught up to him.
After five minutes, Ukyou jumped out of the door with her hands out in a
fashion pose. "Ok. How do I look?" She was wearing the same sleeveless
shirt he gave her that morning, but it was tied at the waist with a wide,
black, cloth belt so the material better hugged the curves of her body--as
opposed to the baggy look she wore earlier. She had also put on a tighter
pair of black pants that would be easier to move in.
Ranma stared at her new look--not to mention her trim frame--with
awe--just the response Ukyou wanted. "Hey! I like it! You can keep the
shirt."
Ukyou gave a short laugh, then asked, "So where to first?"
Ranma started walking down the sidewalk. "Well, first I... we have to...
huh?" Ranma stopped and Ukyou almost walked into his back. They looked
back down the street, hearing a bicycle bell and someone shouting.
The bike came into view, jumping over passing motorists. "Nii hao wuoda
airen! Nii hao! Shampoo been looking for you! You needed at Cat Cafe!"
When she passed close by, she sputtered without enthusiasm, "Nii hao stupid
spatula girl." Ranma and Ukyou followed her path as she bounded down the
street without slowing. "Shai shen wuoda airen! Shai shen! Shampoo found
you! Stupid brakes! Fine time give out...."
Ranma and Ukyou turned to each other and shrugged. Ranma turned and
started walking in the direction Shampoo came from, Ukyou following close
behind.
* * * * *
"You worry me, brother. You're not well." The raspy vioce echoed through
the darkness, frightening dozens of rats from their meals and sending them
scattering.
"You right. He not fight with usual skill."
"Brother? Sage!" Rosemarry shook the orange, lion/man-like heap slumped
forward in front of her, but got little response.
"He do too much, you know. He absorb too many too soon." Parsley placed
a few small leaves in the overhead lantern so it would shed more light into
the musty cave as well as kill the smell floating in from the stagnant
river outside.
Rosemarry tried shaking Sage again, and this time he gave a few grunts.
"I know, but he won't listen. He's wearing himself out fighting Ranma AND
keeping a hold on the ones he's captured. Sage! You have to wake up!"
Parsley sat down on a medium-sized rug he had laid out earlier and pulled
a hotplate out of the inside of his robe. "Not know why I follow him." He
reached inside his drooping sleave and pulled out a pair of candles and
candlesticks and arranged them in front of him. "He make us live in sewer.
But he our leader." He then palmed a bowl from his left sleve and set it
on the hotplate. "If he say we must, we must." He then produced two eggs
from his right sleeve and held them over the bowl. "You want onions?"
Rosemarry sighed. "Sure." *crack crack* _Parsley's so indifferent to
leadership and loyalty that he'll follow anyone who happens to be in power
at the time._
Sage started to stir. He put his hand to his head. "Do... don't worry...
I'll... be fine. Just needed some rest. It's a good thing you were...
waiting at the house... spying like that. Wouldn't... have made it... by
myself. But I'll be... fine." He flexed his bestial jaws into a
frightening yawn.
"No you won't! Your overexerting yourself! You've got to slow down!"
Sage pushed her away. "No! I'm not through yet. I've almost got him."
Rosemarry almost commented on that, but only shook her head slightly. She
rested a hand on his shoulder once more. "Then at least get rid of the
gymnast. She's the hardest for you to control. You would have had Nabiki
if it weren't for her struggling."
Even though Rose's mind-altering talents were useless against her brother,
she could still read his movements. Sage snarled at the idea of not being
able to control someone, but then nodded. "Very well. I will dispose of
her."
"No! Wait!"
Sage turned around. "You've got a problem with that?"
She tried to keep her eyes level with his. "She is not an important part
of Ranma's life. Besides, you don't want a vendetta from the House of
Kunou, do you?"
Sage started stroking his furry chin. "I guess your right."
Parsley stuck a plate in front of Rosemarry. "Just the way you like." He
turned toward Sage. "You want omelet too?"
* * * * *
Mousse stood in front of the seated, white-robed man while on his way to
the kitchen. Mousse was wearing a goofy, frilly apron of Shampoo's and
carrying a tray full of dishes to be washed--Shampoo did tell him that he
was in charge until she came back.
The man in white hadn't ordered anything since he walked in. He just
insisted on seeing Happousai. Neither he nor Shampoo were exactly sure
where the little freak could have been, or cared for that matter--when the
pervert finally woke up yesterday, he left with as many of Shampoo's
unmentionables as he could carry. _That's alright_ thought Mousse, _I'll
be happy to buy her more._
But the only ones who regularly kept up with him were Ranma, his father,
and Mr. Tendo. Mousse scowled when she chose to ask the first person on
her list.
"Are you sure you don't want anything?" He seemed to be asking the empty
chair next to him.
The man in white, assuming that he was being addressed, thought about it a
few seconds while Mousse strained to balance the pile of bowls and plates.
"I suppose you could bring me a glass of water."
Mousse nodded and shuffled off to the kitchen. He came back shortly with
a clear peanutbutter jar in his hand. He was about to pass it to the
stranger when he heard a loud thud outside. Mousse looked toward the door
and the jar tipped in his hand, but the stranger performed a
lightning-quick series of flat-handed punches before the water could reach
his lap, and in no time, the water was back in the jar. He took the
container and looked at it strangely, then at the oddly-dressed fellow in
front of him, then shrugged and took a sip.
A dazed Chinese girl in a waitress uniform staggered through the door and
voices followed: "Are you sure you're alright, Shampoo?""I was only trying
to help. I didn't mean to make you crash like that."
Mousse ran to his love's side, but she was staggering too much for him to
catch her. Ranma and Ukyou stepped through the open doorway. "C'mon
Shampoo, she said she was sorry."
The man in white stood up and strode over to Shampoo's side. Ranma and
Ukyou jerked at his presence. He knelt down and watched the fumbling
waitress. "What happened to her?"
Ranma glanced at Ukyou while she fidgeted in place. She rolled a small
spatula through her fingers nervously. "Well.... It looked as though the
brakes on her bicycle gave out, and she couldn't stop. So I decided to try
and jam the pedals with a spatula and... Ibrokethechaininstead. Sorry."
The man looked up at her and smiled. "Don't be. These things happen."
He turned his head in Shampoo's direction and stuck a pointed finger onto
her chest. Shampoo's head cleared enough for her to stand in one place.
She brought a hand to her head, still slightly dazed, and mumbled, "Stupid
spatula girl." Mousse tried to get Shampoo to lay down, but Shampoo kept
slapping him away.
Ranma's eyes widened. _Pressure points?_ "Hey." The robed man looked at
him. "You wouldn't by any chance be...."
"Thyme?" Everyone turned just as Cologne hopped into the doorway carrying
a box of tea. "I thought I sensed someone new."
The white-robed man bowed in recognition. Ukyou cocked an eye at him,
seeing no resemblance to Happousai at all--but then again, the old man's
almost wrinkled beyond recognition.
Cologne hopped closer. "I had a feeling I'd eventually meet...." She
stared about the room with her bulbous eyes and frowned at all the empty
seats. "What happened to all my customers?" All eyes, even Thyme's, fell
on Mousse.
He backed up and adjusted his bottle-lens glasses. "What? I didn't spill
anything on anybody or break anything!"
Cologne hopped up in front of him. "And?"
Mousse started to sweat. "And since I can't make Ramen like you can, I...
I... I used these." He pulled a small plastic package from his sleeve and
handed it to Cologne.
It was Ramen. Cologne groaned, not relishing the idea of using
second-rate Ramen, but if that was all there was.... "I guess that's Ok."
She turned the package over and read the ingredients. "Not as much spice
as mine, but satisfactory, I suppose." Then she read the expiration date.
_This Ramen will crumble to dust in...._
"Two years ago!" She started mercilessly slapping Mousse and Shampoo with
the box of tea in her hand. "How could you let...."
The other three snuck out the door.
* * * * *
Ranma and Ukyou walked to either side of the tall, white-robed man as they
rapidly explained to him what had happened since Kenny(Sage) first appeared
at Ucchan's (NOTE: This is another lengthy overview of the previous
chapters that I shouln't have to re-explain, so I won't). Thyme listened
and said nothing, occasionally nodding his head, indicating that he
understood everything. His expression remained a thoughtful frown no
matter what the other two told him. When they finally reached the end of
their summary, they fell quiet while Thyme rubbed his chin and considered
everything he'd been told.
Ranma stared at Thyme impatiently with eyebrows raised high, waiting for
him to say something. Thyme halted his pondering and turned to Ranma. "I
think you have a big problem."
Ranma's face contorted. "Well, duh. Can you get this Sage guy off my back?"
Thyme put on a half-convincing smile. "It won't be easy, but I'll do my
best to help."
Ranma faced forward and groaned.
Ukyou directed Thyme's attention in her direction. "What does Sage want
anyway?"
He answered as-a-matter-of-factly, "Ranma, of course." Ranma repeated 'of
course' in a low grumble. Thyme added, adressing Ranma, "I'm not exactly
sure WHY Sage wants you, but I think he struck some kind of deal with your
father."
Ranma's brow furrowed. "Rose said something about that. It's not like
it's the first time Pop's done something like that."
Ukyou could see that Ranma was starting to get really mad, but was
relieved when the Tendo Dojo came into view. "Look, we're almost there!"
She dashed ahead and ran through the gate.
Thyme leaned his head toward his remaining companion. "Is she always this
energetic?"
Ranma nodded.
They reached the gate to find Ukyou by the pond ushering a little old man
with panties on his head. The crumply voice complained: "This better be
important! I was busy up there, y'know!"
Thyme's eyes lit up. "Happousai?"
Happousai turned and stared in disbelief. "Thyme?"
Thyme threw his arms wide and rushed toward the little man, crying, "Poppy!"
Ranma's eyes lit up. _Poppy?_
Happousai dashed at him in a mad flurry of legs with outstretched arms,
crying, "Sonny!"
When they reached each other, though, they started furiously punching at
each other in a blur of arms that was difficult even for Ranma to follow.
"How've ya been, Sonny? Still haven't lost any of the old speed in your
arms I see.""It's been a long time, Poppy. And I haven't forgotten your
training.""Well Sonny, I guess ya want to see if ya can best your old man
this time?"
Ranma and Ukyou watched in amazement, then looked at each other and shrugged.
Suddenly, Happousai stood still with his pipe in the air and a white
streak darted for the sky. "Not bad, but you still have a few tricks to
learn."
Ranma and Ukyou started to worry that Thyme wasn't coming back down, but
to their relief, he soon came plummeting back to Earth over the fishpond.
Before he could hit the pool, though, he started madly punching at the
water with the palms of his hand, and the air pressure he produced kept him
hovering like a helicopter. The grass around the pond almost laid down
flat and the water in the pond started to spill out.
_That guy's good!_ Ramna mused.
Happousai launched himself at Thyme. "I've got you now, Sonny!" He
clasped onto Thyme's leg and they both fell into the water with a large
splash. A dripping Happousai stood up and stared at the surface but only
saw a slumped white robe.
Ranma and Ukyou gasped. Happousai took a cautious step back. "Sonny?"
The white robe quickly sat up and the soaked cowl flew back to reveal a
cute, smiling, crimson-haired, pig-tailed head. Her small shoulders
slipped out of the wide collar, revealing the same breasts Ranma became
familiar with after he fell into Nyanniichuan. She brought her right hand
to her mouth and sucked on her pinky finger as she waved energetically with
the other hand.
Ranma slapped his forehead against his palm. _Oh, man._
* * * * *
Well... uh... well... uh... I... well... see ya next time!