Ryocuilo
bogue@negia.net

Your Run of the Mill Magical Girl Show Starring... 

Destruction! Chaos! Demon Century Earth! Long Title 
with Absolutely No Relevance to the Story! Buta Scouts Fight On!

(Unryuu House Day Int.)
Akari is sitting at the dinner table eating whatever high school girls eat
in anime shows. Nodoka is busy making some tea.
Akari:Ah that was a good generic breakfest Mrs.Saotome!
Nodoka:Oh thank you Akari. It's so nice to cook for some young people
especially now that my son is gone. I wished that I had a daughter though.
One that I could go shopping with for several hours and bore them to 
the point that they would consider suicide. Akari did you want to go buy
some new outfits with me today?
Nodoka turns around to find that Akari has already left.
Nodoka:Isn't there anyone that I can apply incredibly embarassing amounts
of motherly affection on?
Ryouga steps into the kitchen.
Ryouga:Hello Mrs.Saotome.
Nodoka:Hello Ryouga did you ever wonder what you would look like in a nice
sun dress?
(Mrs.Hinako's class Day Int.)
Akari is sitting at her desk talking to two girls who have no names, because
this isn't the anime so they are not going to be called Yuka and Sayuri.
Ryouga
is sitting next to her wearing a very pink (And rather grotesque) dress.
Akari:Oh I'm sorry that Mrs.Saotome took you shopping Ryouga.
Ryouga:It was hell I tell you. Pure hell.
Mrs Hinako:Okay everyone we're having two new students today. Please come 
in.
The door opens and a girl with bluish-black hair steps into the classroom in
a school uniform. The students grumble a hello. 
Mrs.Hinako:Akane Tendo.
Akari:Oh Ryouga I feel like I know that girl. Like we were best friends in a
past life and our memories were erased in order for us to live normal lives.
Ryouga:Oh no, Not again!
Another girl comes in after Akane. It is a girl with red hair which is tied
in a pig-tail. She is dressed in an obviously non-regulation school uniform
. She 
is wearing a skirt which is hiked up her thighs and her shirt is revealing
quite 
a bit of cleavage Every boy except Ryouga gets a nosebleed.
Mrs.Hinako:And her cousin Ranko Tendo.
Ryouga:Strange, I should be out cold by now.
Akari:Oh Ryouga you didn't get a nosebleed it means you care for me deeply!
Ryouga:What kind of stupid logic is that?!
Akari:I love you too Ryouga.
Ranko sits next to Ryouga and Akane sits next to Ranko.
Ranko latches onto Ryouga's arm.
Ranko:Hey stud wanna go out on a date?! You can even wear the dress baby.
Ryouga:Leggo, leggo!
Akane mallets Ranko.
Akane:Ranko don't pester people!
Akari:Stay away from my man you little hussy!
Ranko looks at Akari and stands up. 
Ranko:Hey I was just flirting. is there any problem with that? It's not like
ya own him.
Akari:I'll have you know  our love was foretold and-
Ryouga:Oh god she's in that mode again.
Akari hits Ryouga over the head with a pig.
Akari:As I was saying our love was foretold in the heavans above and we were
destined to be together  for all eternity. Isn't that right Ryouga?
Ryouga:I guess so.
Akari:Ha! See!
Ranko:Yeah right! You know he'd rather be with me! I'm taking your man away
from you right now! Akane let's take care of her!
Akane:Uggh... This is so embarassing.
Ranko and Akane stand side by side and go through several stupid poses.
Ranko:We are the two most dangerous members of...
Ranko and Akane:DoCo!!!
Ranko:Now we shall destroy you with our music!
Ranko and Akane begin to sing very off pitch and are practically wailing.
All the students are writhing in agony.
Ryouga:God this is worse than that Minmei CD I bought.
Akari:I have to transform!
Akari's clothes fly off and Ryouga gets a nosebleed. Akari is now wearing
her buta scout outfit.
Akari:HA! See Ryouga faints at my body and not yours!
Ranko:Bah! He's just a little near-sighted! Imagine fainting at the sight of
an ugly chick like you!
Akane mallets Ranko.
Akane:That wasn't very nice Ranko!
Ranko:Of course it wasn't! We're the bad guys! 
Akane:Oops. Sorry.
Ranko:Let's finish her.
Akane:We don't have any other attacks Ranko.
Ranko:Oh than I guess we'll have to call a youma.
Akane:Youma come out!
There is a big and really crappy light show. A green, muscular figure with 
insectoid wings on his back appears.
Cell:Son-Goku eat a senzu and fig- uh where am I?
Ranko:Akane you clutz that's the wrong Youma!
Akane:Well where do I send him to!
Ranko looks Cell over.
Ranko:Why don't you send him over to Sailor Moon he sorta has rabbit ears.
Cell is sent off to Sailor Moon.
Ranko:I'll call the youma this time!
A giant monster with blue fish scales appears.
Ranko:Ha! Now we shall finish you off with this demon!
Akari takes out a giant pig and flattens the Youma.
Akari:Buta Press!
Ranko and Akane share aprehensive looks.
Ranko:Gee I knew we were gonna lose, but not that fast.
Akari:Now I will heal you in the name of the pig!
Ranko:Wait a minute! Heal us?! Don't you mean your just gonna conform us to
your
mind set?!
Akari:Pretty much, but 'heal' sounds so much better than brainwash.
Ranko and Akane are not surrounded in a stupid light show because we're
running
on a tight budget so there is merely a cut to what they look like after
they're
'healed'. Akane looks the same, but Ranko...
Ryouga:That's why I didn't get a nosebleed she's a guy!
Yep Ranko is really Ranma Saotome and yes he's still wearing the dress.
Akari:Now I remember we were best friends when we lived on the moon kingdom
about
a zillion years ago! We were re-incarnated so that we may fufill our destiny
of
saving the galaxy!
Ranma:Yeah,yeah tell us something we don't know!
Ryouga:So I guess that means your going to stop coming on to me.
Ranma latches onto Ryouga's arm.
Ranma:Oh I wouldn't say that.There are always yaoi stuff in these magical
girl 
shows! So baby what are you doing tonight?!
Akari tugs on Ryouga's other arm.
Akari:Let him go!
Ryouga and Ranma begin a tug of war game with Ryouga in the middle of it.
Mrs.Hinako:Oooh you three are perverts and delinquents! Happo go-en Satsu!
All of the chi is drained from Ranma,Ryouga and Akari.
Mrs.Hinako:Okay let's get back to our studies.
All the students who were conveniently gone for the fight reappear and start
reading their books.Ranma, Akari and Ryouga are still drained and can barely
move
much less talk loudly.
Ranma:(Whispering)He's mine.
Akari:(Whispering)He's mine.
Ryouga:(Whispering)Do I have any say in this?
Ranma and Akari:(Whispering)No.
Ryouga:(Whispering)This sucks

Well that's it for now. I probably won't do another one unless I get some
response. Until next time. Ja ne