I'm going to be changing the title of this piece to "Martial Arts Marriage
Ceremony", so be looking for that.  




The Wedding: For or Against

Legal and intro stuff:  This is a new project that I may or may not take any
further.  These characters are not mine.  If I ever claimed that they were
I'd be forced to eat Stefan Gagne, or something like that.

##########################

Ch 1  Critical Thinking



	Ranma was discouraged.

	It wasn't that he didn't like the uncute tomboy.  It wasn't that at all.
He really did like her.  Of course, it had taken her almost dying and their
almost getting married to make him realize it.  

	Funny how their almost wedding had galvanized his resolve in a way that
their ordeal at Jyusendo had not.  

	Diety, but she had looked good in that dress!  

	That moment more than any other had helped him to banish the "Keep Akane at
arms length" reflex back to the frightening and dark reaches of his primal
insecurity.  He knew now that more than anything else, he wanted her to be
happy.  He wanted to be with her.  He had realized it when he'd seen the
almost hidden disappointment in her eyes when her father had announced his
decision to postpone the wedding.  The funny thing was, that he, too, had
been disappointed.  He wouldn't have admitted it at the time, but he had
been surprised at how strongly that disappointment had gnawed at his heart.  

	He didn't want to wait any longer.  He wanted to get married.  He wanted to
marry Akane.  He wanted to do it now.

	That was the root of his discouragement.

	He was pretty sure that Akane would go along with it.  He hadn't had the
courage to talk to her about it yet, but after all this time, he thought
that he actually understood what she'd been trying to show him all along.
What her anger and her jealousy and her desire to cook him a decent meal and
her little glimpses of shyness and embarrassment really meant.  

	She kinda sorta maybe liked him too.

	She had as much as admitted it when they'd talked before they *didn't* get
married.  She'd said that she was willing to go through with it because he'd
said that he loved her.

	Of course, like an idiot, he'd denied saying anything of the sort and
pushed her away again, justly incurring her sometimes-unjust wrath.  But the
point was still valid.  She (for reasons he couldn't fathom) *liked* him.
Maybe... maybe even... maybe even loved him.

	The thought was electrifying.  The thought was thrilling and wonderful and
terrifying all at once.  

	Akane would go along with the wedding.  He was pretty sure that that
wouldn't be a problem once he got up the courage and the brain function to
speak sincerely and intelligently with her about it.  She wasn't the problem.

	The problem was everyone else.  

	He wasn't *quite* naive enough to believe that all the people who had
descended like a plague of locusts to destroy his first wedding attempt
would be on their best behavior for a second one.  Chances were good that
they'd still be quite upset by the prospect of losing him or Akane (or both
in the bizarre case of a certain Kendoist) once and for all.  And chances
were even better that they'd, once again, try to do something about it.

	Of course, he'd never been able to prove that Mousse, or Ryoga, or Happosai
had acted deliberately to sabotage the event, but he wasn't throwing out all
his suspicions just yet either.  The girls on the other hand...  Well, it
just hadn't been pretty. 

	He had two choices:  

	One: he could give up on the idea of getting married anytime soon and try
to wait out his problems.  This had the advantage of not hurting anybody too
badly, at least not as badly as they would be hurt by being told "You're not
the one that I love."  It also had the disadvantage of uncertainty.  Chances
were good that he'd be waiting until he and Akane were both old and grey.

	Two: he could find a way to: 
		A.  Tell Akane how he felt
		B.  Ask her to marry him
		C.  Actually pull off a wedding ceremony without either one of them being
kidnapped /killed /drugged /hypnotized and without allowing "things" to get
so out of hand that the whole thing would once again be called off.

	Neither prospect seemed very good to him.  

	Wallowing in his discouragement wasn't helping any either.  He needed to do
something to keep his mind occupied with something else for a while.  All he
could think of was homework. _Might as well._ he thought. _It can only
*improve* my mood._

	He was knee deep in the tangles of algebra when there was a knock at on his
door frame.  He looked up to see Nabiki leaning through it.  "This came for
you." she said, holding a letter towards him.  

	"Come in." he said, holding out his hand to take it.

	Curious, she stood next to him as he pulled it out of the envelope.  The
yen signs in her eyes were *almost* but not quite invisible as she saw the
characters on the outside fold.  "Challenge" they said proudly.  She made
between thirty and forty thousand yen on a typical fight involving Ranma.
More if she had advanced notice.

	Ranma sighed loudly.  Not just a little sigh, or a "Here we go again" sigh,
but a real, honest to goodness, unhappy, almost depressed sigh.  Nabiki
frowned.  That wasn't normal.  He usually just shrugged at challenges and
met them head on.  What was getting him down?  She didn't want him off
during a fight.  It would make the outcome too unpredictable.  She bit her
lip and calculated.

	"Who's it from?" she finally asked.

	"Mousse."  

	"What does he want?"

	Ranma looked down at the letter unenthusiastically.  "He wants to kill me
for dishonoring his lovely Shampoo."

	The flatness of his tone scared her.  This could be *very* bad for
business.  "So what are you going to do?"

	He looked up at her apathetically.  "Beat him up I guess."

	"But you don't really want to?"

	"'Course not.  I got nothin' against Mousse.  Not really."

	This was not the Ranma she knew.  Where was his care- free enthusiasm?
Where was his arrogance and fire?  She studied him for a moment.  Maybe it
was just his situation.  Mousse was a nice enough sort.  Just a little dense
at times.  For that reason alone he and Ranma should be the best of friends.
They had a lot in common.  "You know what your problem is?"

	Ranma's lips tightened.  He knew exactly what his problem... No, his
*problems* were.  He didn't need Nabiki trying to capitalize off yet
*another* fight that he wished would never happen.  "Yeah."  He said.  "I'm
a cold, thoughtless, money grubber who cares more about yen than I do about
my friends or my pride." he dead panned.  "No wait.  That's *your* problem."
He looked back down at the letter testily.

	"Very funny." Nabiki said dryly.  That's what she got for trying to help.
Still, she honestly wanted to see him feeling better.  "Your problem is that
you just don't understand people."  She put a hand lightly on his shoulder.
"Think of it kind of like-" she paused, trying to think of a metaphor that
would help Ranma grasp this concept.  There was only one thing that would
work for sure.

	"Think of it kind of like martial arts.  In a battle, you have to know your
enemy.  You have to get inside his skin; guess what he's thinking.  Learning
his strengths and weaknesses isn't enough.  You've got to understand his
motivation so that you can guess what he's going to do next,  and why, and
how he'll respond to what you do."  

	She leaned a little closer for emphasis.  "If you understood what motivates
Mousse, then you might find a way to make friends with  him.  All you've got
to do is help him see that you two have common interests."

	Suddenly Ranma was intrigued.  "Common interests?"  He asked.  

	"Look it up in the dictionary." she said as she headed for the door.  

	"Hey Nabiki," he called after her.

	"Hmm?" she turned her head to look at him and he smiled.

	"Thanks.  That's good advice."

	Nabiki smiled back.  "Always glad to serve."  She held out her hand.
"That'll be five-hundred yen."

***

Ch 2  Chapter Title Goes Here


	Ranma scowled at the dictionary.  

	He was pretty sure that he knew what "common" meant.  He didn't think
Nabiki meant to say that his "interests" were "coarse or crude" or that they
were "of the usual kind; ordinary."  He was pretty sure that she meant the
"belonging equally to each or all" kind of common.

	"Interests" was another matter.  Did she mean "a feeling of wanting to know
or learn" or did she mean "what is good for one"?  He and Mousse weren't
interested in many of the same things.  Martial arts and cures for Jusenkyo
curses were about it.  That couldn't be what she'd meant.

	That left the good for one answer, but it didn't make a lot of sense to
him.  What could possibly be good for both him *and* Mousse?  Mostly Mousse
wanted to marry Shampoo, so he was mad at Ranma because...  Because Shampoo
was in love with him.  _That's it!_  Ranma realized.  Mousse wanted Shampoo
to stay away from him.  He wanted the same thing.  This was worthy of
further thought.  

	Nabiki was right.  This was just like a battle.  He had to figure out how
he could make Mousse work *for* him instead of *against* him.

	But could Mousse be reasoned with?

	There was only one way to find out.  Ranma stood up and walked towards the
front door.

	"Ranma?" Akane's cheerful voice froze him in place.  

	He turned to look at her where she stood at the base of the stairs.  He
smiled a little, lost in her deep brown eyes.  Would he ever be able to show
her how he felt?

	"Are you going somewhere, Ranma?"

	Doing a quick impression of a deer mesmerized by the headlights of an
oncoming car, Ranma blinked.  If he told her that he was going to the
Nekohanten, she'd assume the worst. _Quick, say something you idiot.  She's
gonna get mad in a second_.  "I'm going to the Nekohanten." 

	"Oh really?" she asked coldly, as Ranma mentally slapped himself in the
forehead.  "And what will you be doing there"

	_Nothing for it now._ "I need to talk to Mousse."

	"*Mousse*?!  You're going to talk to *Mousse*?!"

	Ranma nodded. "Uh-hu."  He said eloquently, leaving his mouth hanging open
for a few seconds afterward. _Why does she have this effect on me?_  

  _Great._ he thought.  _Akane and I are going to have another fight._
Could all the thinking that he'd been doing about how not to fight with
Mousse help him now?  He'd decided to look at it like battle tactics.  That
was it.  He might be able to stop putting his foot in his mouth if he tried
to respond to her as if this were a battle.  A battle of words.  _Think, man._

	Akane's lips formed a tight, thin line.  Her fists clenched and Ranma could
almost hear her teeth grinding.  Suddenly, he had an inspiration.  "Do you
wanna come too?" he asked, as innocently as he could.  His hand went to the
back of his neck and he smiled up at her nervously.  _I sure hope this works._  

	"You're *such* a stup...  What did you say?"

	Ranma smiled for real this time.  "Come with me."

	The effect this request had on her was somewhat similar to what happens to
a snowman when you point your industrial hair dryer at it, and put it on
high.  The sharp lines in her face softened, and eventually settled into a
nice, almost dreamy smile.  "I...  I mean, I'd like to, but...  Kasumi...
and laundry... helping, and..."

	_So I'm not the only one who gets a little tongue tied.  That's nice to
know._ "Okay.  I'll be back in time for dinner."  He wanted to touch her as
he walked by.  Maybe take her hand, or brush her arm, but habit won out, and
he stepped clear of her carefully as he continued his journey to the door.

***

	_There she goes._  Ranma watched Shampoo pedal away as he sat on the roof
across the street.  It was time to make his move.  He wanted to be on his
way home before she got back from her delivery.  He jumped to the sidewalk
and crossed to the doorway quickly, ignoring the stares and the pointing of
the other pedestrians.  

	There weren't very many customers in the ramen shop.  That was probably
good.  He chose a table, and waited for Mousse to get to him.

	It didn't take long for the myopic waiter to come to his table.  He was
halfway through the specials when Ranma cut him off.  "Mousse, we need to talk."

	Adjusting his glasses, Mousse took another look at his customer.  "Oh, it's
you Saotome.  If you think that you can change my mind, then you're wasting
your time.  I'm going to kill you and free Shampoo once and for all."

	"That's what I wanna talk to you about.  Freein' Shampoo.  Is there any way
that she can forget about me and go home?  Does she really hafta marry me
before she can ever return to your village?"

	Mousses face clouded over with rage.  "How *dare* you taunt me?!  I will
make you suffer, Saotome!  This I swear on-"

	"Yeah, yeah, I know.  Just answer the question.  What would it take to get
Shampoo to forget about me?"

	"If only she would forget you, you enemy of women!  When we fight next
week, then she'll be able to go home.  She won't be expected to marry a dead
man!"

	"Sure.  Whatever.  Just one more question.  Shampoo's crazy about me.  What
makes you think that killin' me will get you on'er good side?  Aint it more
likely that she'll hate you for it, or even try'n kill you?  Are you sure
you've thought this through enough?"

	"What else am I supposed to do!?"

	"I dunno.  I'm sure not the expert on love, but if you let me, I wanna help
you get Shampoo to like you."

	Mousse looked suspicious.  "Why are you being nice to me?"

	"'Cause I think you and me both want the same thing: for Shampoo to leave
me alone.  I'll level with you.  I kinda like... I mean, I really wanna...
You know, I'm really in l- l-"  _Great.  Akane ain't even here and I'm
chokin' on my tongue._  It was time to regroup.  "I got nothin' against
Shampoo, but I don't wanna marry her.  If you wanna marry her, then I'll
help, 'cause that way she won't be feedin' me any more hypnosis mushrooms or
nothin'.  I wanna get her to like you."

	"Oh?  And just how are you going to do *that*?"

	"I got a couple of ideas.  What if you beat her up?"

	"And what good would that do?"

	"Well duh?  She wants to marry me because I beat her.  If you beat her,
won't she have to marry you?  I've seen that dumb law book of yours.  She
has to marry a male who beats her."

	Mousse snorted.  "You obviously weren't paying attention.  The law doesn't
say that she has to marry any male who beats her, it says she has to marry
any *outsider* male who beats her.  Within the tribe, any male who attacks a
female is punished."

	There went plan A.  "Well, what if I got married?  If I was married to Ak-
If I was to marry Ak-  If I married somebody else, would Shampoo still be
after me?"

	Mousse smirked.  Obviously Ranma didn't need to draw him a diagram.  He was
thinking about it, though, and that was all that mattered. "Hmm. *If* you
could pull off a wedding without Shampoo or anyone else interfering, she
might still come after you, but only if she decided that you'd come back to
her if she could prove that she was the better wife for you.  That would
mean that she would challenge Ak- I mean, the girl you married to a fight.
I don't think that's what you want."

	"No, of course not."

	"Still, marrying... someone else would go a long way towards showing her
that you're really not interested.  Sooner or later though, the two of them
would have to fight."

	That didn't sound good.  The thought of putting Akane in danger made him
feel sick inside.  Of course, he'd try to always be there to protect her,
but he was only human.  Maybe he should offer to train with her regularly.
Just in case.  Hopefully they'd be able to reason with Shampoo, and it
wouldn't come to a fight, but the extra training couldn't hurt anything, and
it would give him a chance to spend more time with her.    

	  "Listen, can we talk tonight?  Sometime when you're not working?"

	Mousse looked intent for a moment.  "You're really serious about this,
aren't you?"

	"Dead serious."

	"Alright.  I'll come to the dojo when I get off.  I'll give you this one
chance, but if this doesn't work, you will fight me.  Is that understood?"

	Ranma grinned.  He resisted the urge to comment on what he thought Mousse's
chances of winning such a fight were.  He wanted an ally in him, after all.
"Perfectly.  I'll see you then."



.\\ishamouse~   	www.geocities.com/tokyo/4022

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Second Student Tendo Kasumi School of Philosophy

"That was Zen; this is Tao."
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