(Scene: Scott's apartment, which for once is actually decorated
a bit for Christmas. Akane is attempting to knit something (soft
sculpture? hard to tell) while Shampoo is writing furiously, tongue
tucked in one corner of her mouth.)
Shampoo: How you spell "matrimonial"?
Akane: M-a-t-r-i-m-o-n-i-a-l, I think. But that's not going to work.
Shampoo: Hah! Shampoo not know why she not think of this plan sooner!
(Scott and Ranma enter, bearing several bags (mostly from grocery
stores) and go into the kitchen. Scott comes back out.)
Scott: Whatcha writing, Shampoo?
Shampoo: Letter! We no have Christmas in Amazon village, so Shampoo not
get gifts from Santa all this time. So Shampoo send him letter, saying she
will forget all gifts he owe her, if Santa help Shampoo get Ranma for
Christmas!
(Scott considers telling her there's no Santa Claus, then
remembers who he's talking to and where she came from...)
Scott: Shampoo, Christmas isn't about how much or what you get.
Presents aren't even the main point of Christmas.
Shampoo & Ranma (together): They aren't?!
Scott: You should sit down for this. The "Real Meaning of Christmas"
speech takes a while. Now, many years ago in the city of Bethlehem...
(Scott tells the Christmas Story. Most of our readers should
know it by heart, even if they never celebrate Christmas...)
Scott: ..."For God so loved the world, He gave His only begotten son,
that whosoever believeth in Him shall not perish, but have eternal
life." And that's the real meaning of Christmas.
Shampoo: Okay! But Shampoo confused. Where Santa come in?
Scott: That's another long story.
Akane: And one that will have to wait. It's time for another chapter of
"Twilight Existence."
Shampoo: Shampoo not remember that one.
Ranma: Well, in this one, the Jyuusenkyo springs change minds as well as
bodies, so my female side is pretty much a whole other person who calls
herself "Ranko."
Akane: Things have progressed pretty much as before, although Ryouga now
turns into a boy named Shinnosuke instead of P-chan.
Shampoo: Shampoo marry Ranma in this one?
Ranma: Actually, Ranko didn't fight you in this world, so you aren't
hunting her down. I doubt it.
Shampoo: How come Shampoo never get marry Ranma?
Scott: There was "Deep Reflections".
Shampoo: How come Shampoo never marry Ranma in happy stories?
Scott, Ranma and Akane: *sigh*
TWILIGHT EXISTENCE
by Scott K. Jamison
(Takahashi Disclaimer)
Chapter Six
[That was *Ryouga*?] wrote Ranma in our diary. [I remember some
guy jumping by while I got a stone out of my shoe. I guess he was
shouting something; I wasn't paying attention. If I'd've known it was
Ryouga, I would've gone to see what happened to him.
[Pops is still changing the subject whenever I ask about Mom. I
think him turning into a panda one time was actually deliberate! You try
asking him. But I got a funny feeling maybe we don't wanna know.]
I inscribed the details of my own day (mine tended to be less
eventful than Ranma's, so it was a short entry.) It was still several
hours till supper, and Father had given me a small allowance, so I
decided to get some snacks. It was cool out, so I put Ranma's jacket on,
and a Mao hat.
Unfair though it may be, cuteness definitely has its advantages.
For example, when I stopped by the sweet bun shop, all I had to do was
turn on the cute and the counterman said, "You're such a sweet little
girl! Here, have another bun--for free!"
"Oooo! Golly! Thank you so much!" My appetite is just as big
as Ranma's, in proportion to my size. Extra food is something not to be
passed up. But "cute" doesn't work on everyone. Pity, that.
As I walked down the street, I heard shouting from an empty lot,
so I rounded the wall to see what was up. (I share an unhealthy
curiousity with my brother.) Three figures in gym sweats, their heads
wrapped in bandages, surrounded a girl in a school uniform I didn't
recognize. She had a ponytail tied to one side, and was carrying a gym
bag. Even though the others were carrying clubs, she carried herself as
if she were the one in charge of the situation.
"We're finishing you off here and now!" shouted one of the
bandaged figures. "Prepare to die!!"
The ponytailed girl didn't hesitate. She drew a gymnastics
ribbon from her gym bag as she dropped it, and unwound the ribbon with a
snap.
"Forgive me, please, if I've failed to convey my message!!" she
said, as she whipped the ribbon about, knocking her opponents off their
feet. "If I may restate it...perhaps this...or this...or *this* will be
clearer!" She was repeatedly lashing them with the ribbon, actually
cutting their clothing, and possibly the skin beneath. Even though her
voice was smooth, I could see bloodloust in her eyes and cruelty in her
smile. I had to stop this somehow.
The next time the ribbon was on the backswing I snagged it. The
ponytailed girl wasn't at all thrown off balance, though she was
obviously surprised.
"Don't you think that's enough?" I asked. "I mean, you've
already won, right?" I was hoping she could accept her victory and move
on.
"You caught that ribbon as if it were nothing." she replied. "If
you'll forgive me, you seem to be no ordinary girl."
"Uh, yes...I guess you could say that!" I was a long way from
ordinary, indeed.
"Good...because I prefer not to treat girls--" she flipped her
foot and brought one of the discarded clubs to her hand, "--with ordinary
courtesy!!" She lunged at me with the club. I ducked and rolled out of
the way. She did a very nice somersault, and we came up facing each
other. I tried to look more brave than I felt.
She gave me a crooked smile. "Well. You are very good! Heh."
She produced a flower from her sleeve and tossed it to me. "Remember.
I'm called the Black Rose of Hebereke Girl's School. Kodachi...the Black
Rose. Please don't forget it." Then she bounded off, laughing like a
madwoman.
"Miss Kodachi, you forgot your...gym bag." But she was already
out of sight.
The bandaged people started weeping. "Oh, how humiliating!"
"Hey, what's with the crying? You attacked her, remember?
Besides, I thought boys didn't cry."
"We're not boys!" one said as they ripped off the bandages hiding
their faces. "We're the Furinkan rhythmic gymnastics team!" They were
really beat-up looking, but still recognizable as girls from my class.
And from the look of it, they'd been beaten up *before* they attacked
Kodachi.
"Say, you're Ranko Saotome, aren't you?" asked one, Hiroko. "You
live with Akane Tendou?"
"That's right."
"We'll have to go to Plan B then. Could you take us to the Dojo,
please?"
I dropped off Kodachi's gym bag at the nearest police box and we
proceeded to the Tendou home.
I fetched some tea while Kasumi found Akane. Then the girls
explained their problem.
"Every member of the team...injured?!" Akane asked.
"We were ambushed!" replied Hiroko.
"Now we'll have to withdraw from the match!" put in another
girl.
"Then...you want me to take your place?" Akane looked puzzled.
"Please, Akane! There's nothing else we can do!" pleaded
Hiroko. "You see, this next match...is Martial Rhythmic Gymnastics!"
"What's that?" I asked.
"Simply put, the schools' champions fight with the techniques of
rhythmic gymnastics!"
"Fight? Girls beating each other up with ribbons and clubs?
That sounds awful!"
Hiroko shrugged. "It's a relatively new wrinkle. Truth to tell,
most of us aren't very good at fighting. Even if we weren't so injured,
we probably couldn't have beat Hebereke in next week's match. But
this..this *cheating* is just too much!"
"I'm still not sure I get it..." said Akane, "but all right! I
will avenge you!"
"Ohhh, thank you, Akane!" They clutched her hands as though
there were no tomorrow.
After dinner, Akane and I went out to the training hall. She had
put on her gi, and was looking at the equipment the gymnasts had left
behind.
"I shouldn't have agreed so quickly. I don't even know how to
use these things. Maybe you should be doing this, Ranko. You're pretty
acrobatic."
"You know I don't like violence. You'll do fine, Akane."
"Excuse me." came a male voice from the doorway.
"Ryouga?"
"Shinnosuke, actually." Ryouga's other half smiled as he came
in. "Good to see you folks again. Would you believe Ryouga doesn't have
his own address written down anywhere?"
"Sounds about right. I'm afraid I don't know where he lives
either. You, Ranko?"
"No, but Ranma knows where he used to live. You can ask him
later."
"Thanks. What's up with you girls?"
I explained the circumstances as Akane warmed up. She took a
club in each hand, leapt into the air, twirled the clubs...and dropped
them.
"Is that supposed to happen?" asked Shinnosuke. Akane flushed
red.
"Very funny. Let's try the ribbon." It quickly became obvious
she didn't know how to use that either.
"Are you supposed to get tangled up?"
"Shh!" I warned. I could see Akane's frustration rising.
Next, Akane tried the hoop. Unfortunately, she didn't quite
clear the hoop as she somersaulted through it, and it snapped.
Shinnosuke was about to say something, but I put my hand over his mouth.
"That does it!" snarled Akane as she stamped her foot.
Shinnosuke took my hand off his mouth. "I remember seeing some
notes on rhythmic gymnastics in my backpack. Maybe Ryouga knows
something about it. I'll go check." He left the hall.
Akane's attempt to use the ball was equally disastrous. She
burst into tears. "I'm a klutz! I'm a klutz! I'm a klutz!"
"Don't worry, Akane. With some practice, your natural grace will
come through."
"I can instruct you." came a voice from the door. It was
Ryouga. I could tell now by his bearing. Much more self-assured than
Shinnosuke, almost arrogant.
"Ryouga...?" asked Akane, just to make sure.
"Yes. According to this note," he held up a piece of paper, "you
need some training in martial rhythmic gymnastics."
"You know that stuff?" I asked. "Where'd you learn it?"
"The same place I learned my other weapons skills...and no, I do
not care to say where that was. Observe. The ribbon." He picked up the
long strip of cloth, untangled it, and then spin-snapped it at me. The
ribbon struck four times right next to me. If I'd flinched, I could have
been hurt.
"That was amazing, but you should be more careful of Ranko." said
Akane.
"Gosh." Ryouga blushed while making the ribbon hover. I
suspected he still harbored some resentment towards me.
After a couple of hours, Ryouga called a halt.
"That's enough special drilling for today." I thought so too.
He'd been using me as the demonstration target. Never quite connecting,
but coming way too close.
Panting heavily, Akane said "Thank you...so much."
"You handled the ribbon very well. You're making very quick
progress."
"Do you really think so, Ryouga?"
In fact, she'd tangled herself up again. I held my tongue,
though. Akane was still dangerously frustrated.
I untangled her, and Akane went to take a bath to soothe her sore
muscles while I made tea for Ryouga. I decided I'd change out of my
leotard when it was my turn for the bath.
"Ryouga, do you still have a problem with me?" I asked. "If you
do, I'd like to get it out in the open so we can talk about it."
"Oh, I don't have a problem with you, but there is something I
need to discuss with Ran--" as he tossed his tea in my face and I blacked
out.
I came to at the side of the school again, running. I looked
behind to see the groundskeeper had been using a hose to water the
flowers. He didn't seem to have noticed my change, probably because he
was too busy chewing out Kunou, who'd tripped over the hose. The
swordsman apologized, then approached me.
"Ah, fair Ranko Saotome. I see that once again your brother has
departed on one of his mysterious errands. Someday I shall learn how he
manages to vanish in the twinkling of an eye, and always when I am just
about to triumph."
"Good afternoon, Upperclassman."
"Odd. It occurs to me that I have never seen you two together.
Then again, I don't believe most of the students here had seen me with my
own sister before this morning."
"Your...sister?"
"Did not your brother inform you?"
"I haven't had a chance to re--er, talk to him yet."
"It has come to my attention that my sister Kodachi has taken a
fancy to Ranma Saotome." Kodachi was Kunou's sister? Come to think of
it, there was a family resemblance. "Thus it is that this upcoming match
shall decide if she or Akane is to be Ranma's love."
"Whaat?!" I couldn't believe Akane had agreed to such a stupid
thing.
"It is quite likely, I fear, that the lovely Akane Tendou will
lose this battle, but it will be to her gain. For in losing her unwanted
attachment to your brother, she will again be free to express her true
affection for myself."
"Upperclassman Kunou, are you by any chance on heavy
medication?"
"Why, no, my health is quite fine, but I thank you for your
concern, my pigtailed goddess. Ah, the bell rings. 'Tis to class we
must now wend our weary way. Till we meet again, Ranko."
I hurriedly checked the diary. No entries since the last time
I'd read it. I used the next period to update my portion. Fortunately,
I wasn't caught. Akane later attributed this to the teacher knowing I
took lots of notes and assuming I was just more enthusiastic than usual.
Between periods, I searched for hot water, which is harder to
find than you might think since I couldn't openly use the washrooms or
the showers. Finally, I managed to cadge some from the teachers'
lounge. Too bad Ranma ended up late for his next class.
I was finally able to read Ranma's reply the next day.
[Woke up feeling kinda confined, and with Ryouga sniggering at
me. He said I didn't deserve Akane cause I was only half a man. Told
him I was enough man to pound him. He pointed out I was wearing a girl's
leotard. Said he'd be happy to show Akane what a real man was like.
[Got angry, started chasing him. All over the house, including
into Akane's bedroom. Turns out we interrupted Kodachi ambushing her,
though didn't know it at the time. Ended up on roof fighting the jerk,
though too tight clothing made it uncomfortable. Sorry 'bout you
leotard, will get you a new one.
[We accidentally knocked someone off roof. I went to catch. Was
Kodachi, as she later introduced herself. She came on to me, gave me
roses with some kind of paralysis gas on them. Tried kissing me but
Akane chased her off. Not sure where Ryouga went.
[Akane covered me with jacket, but it blew off. Awfully cold on
roof, couldn't move for a couple of hours.
[Told Akane about gas this morning, not sure if she believed me.
At school, met Kodachi again. Still coming on to me. Told her I already
have fiancee. Akane's useful after all. She challenged Akane for
privilege of relationship with me. Nice to be wanted, but Kodachi's
obviously nuts.
[Worse, she's Kunou's sister. He's all in favor of me dating
her, which makes me *really* worried about the girl.]
Akane's comment was, "No way am I losing to her! Black Rose,
watch out!"
To Be Continued....
Next time, a pivotal match!
SKJAM!
"Consider the peril inherent in Beryl, she's--not--gneiss!"