Ranma 1/2: Ouch! Damn it! I love you!

				By Scott Baker
	  Note*Ranma 1/2 is a trademark of it's respective companies.

	     Author note* Hi, this is my first attempt at a FanFic,
	                any or all insulting mail goes to
			        digihalo@.atom.com
		 (Call it what you will, just don't call it a story!)	
	
                     
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			       Opening song: Closer

			    You let her take your money.
			     She likes to find new ways.
			  You let her lie in front of you.
			She doen't even laugh in your face.
		     Help me! She's blackmailing me for money.
		     Help me! How in the hell 'em I gonna pay?
		      Help me! Now I have to work all my life.
			     Help me get away from her!
		       She wants to extort you like an animal,
		   She wants the payment from inside your wallet.
			She wants to extort you like an animal,
		   She wants the payment from inside your wallet.
			   You get me closer to Nabiki.

	
	=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
		     Part one: Damn Tomboy knocked me out again!

"Ranma no baka!" Akane yells running down the hall with her trademark
'hyperspace hammer'.
"Akane no baka! How do you like it?" Ranma yells back in dismay.
"You ruined my dinner, you jerk!" Akane yells.
"Is that what you call it?" Ranma response.
 Akane finally makes contact to Ranma skull,
all goes black for Ranma.
 
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

	Two hours later....
Ranma finally opens his eyes.
"Where the hell am I?" Ranma thinks.
Ranma gets off the bed, and starts to walk down stairs.
"Wow, I feel great." Ranma thinks.
Everyone is sitting around the dinner area.
"So, Ranma finally wake up?" Soun asks.
"Uhh, yeah I guess." Ranma says
"Sorry for hitting you. I didnt think you would be out for
that long." Akane says.
"Yeah, sure I feel great." Ranma says.
"Hey, don't be sarcastic." Akane says.
"No, I mean it! I've never felt better!" Ranma says happily
"Ranma are you okay?" Akane asks worried.
"Sure am." Ranma says with a warm smile.
"Uh, did'nt you hit him on the head today?" Nabiki asks.
"Uhhh, yeah" Akane says.
"Well that explains it." Nabiki says.
Ranma looks around, untill he find what he is looking for, and smerks
Ranma gets up and goes to the phone.
"Hello, Chuckie cheese's?" Ranma says over the phone.
"Yes?" Order says.
"Hi, this is the board of health a consumer says that you have a 
pestcontrol
problem." Ranma says.
"Oh, is that so?" Order says.
"Yeah, he said he saw a 6 foot rat walking around...HAHAHAHAHA!" Ranma 
says.
"YOU DAMN KIDS!" The order says.
<Click>
Everyone looks in the direction of Ranma in surprise.
"What?" Ranma asks.
"Why did you just..." Akane says.
"just?" Ranma says.
"You sure your okay?" Akane asks.
"Fine. Ya wanna go and get something to eat?"
"My treat." Ranma says.
"WHaT??" Akane asks.
"Lets go somewhere good." Ranma says.
"You are right. He is acting wierd!" Soun says to no one.
"Ranma are you sure?" Akane asks totally bewildered.
"Yeah. You sure are cute!" Ranma says.
"NANI???" Akane yells.

<'.'.'.Commercial Break'.'.'.'>
"Warning AOL Commercial" sign comes on your screen.

Goofy looking guy in his mid-thritys shows up on the screen.
"Hi, my friend told me to try America On-line."
"I asked him why?"
"And he said its better than masterbating!"
"So I gave it a try!" "He was right!"
"And in weeks I was making fake accounts, charging stuff to people
in Japan, even mass mailing my old school!"
"Wow, and if you don't like that kinda stuff you can always
be charged our unbelivably low $4.95* an hour."
"So give it a try!" "Thank you!"
*=$4.95 is rate current if you live in these U.S. states:
Mozzumoua
Graftilopaza
BLAHBLAHBLAH

<'.'.'.End of the stupid commercial break'.'.'.'.>
"What am I saying?" Ranma thinks.
"Is this some kind of joke?" Akane says.
"No joke. I love you!" Ranma says.
<Thinks: Holy shit!>
"Ranma!!! NO BAKA!!!" Akane yells and knocks him out.

<!> *Ranma 1/2 pop quiz; Akane has gotten mad for no reason because:
<A> She is a tomboy <B> Because she hates Ranma <or> <C>
The author really didn't want to write a date scene!
Pick anyone and I win. <!> End of quiz.

"That idiot!" Akane says to a wall in her room.
"....." the wall says.
"He doesn't even care how I feel. He should'nt be joking like that!"
Akane says
"If he really liked me he would show it, would'nt he?" Akane thinks.

Part 2 will be out if anyone wants it to be...